The Seed Shrouded By Night
by Sky Painter
Summary: When he met Aria, Toushirou Hitsugaya couldn't see beyond the sad eyes and quiet personality. But through her the world he sees grows bigger, and he finally begins to learn the lessons of the heart. *HitsugayaXOC*
1. Prologue

**Prologue**

Could a heart become any bleaker?

How many times can a heart be mangled before it stopped beating? I've asked myself this question so many times. Surely, by now, it would have stopped beating. Surely I would have passed on. And yet...

And yet, I kept pushing forward. I don't know how I did it. I thought my heart was locked up through and through, completely engulfed in darkness, never able to surface. And yet I still felt the drive to keep going forward. What was it that kept me going? I searched, and I finally found the answer.

Hope.

I was quite shocked to have found this. I thought I had lost that feeling years ago. Damn these human emotions. I often find myself wishing I wasn't human, so that I wouldn't have to feel this pain, these feelings...

_Someone please_, I cry out from the deepest bowels of my heart. _Someone, please save me..._


	2. Message

Yay! The story's started!

Hi everyone! This is my first fanfic! I hope I don't screw up too badly…

Beware: I am a HUGE Hitsugaya fan, I'm just not into any of the current couplings of him with other existing characters. So, I decided to create my own. A warning: one of the characters is a little bit based off a character from Yu-Gi-Oh 5d's. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I do NOT own Bleach. I just LOVE watching and reading it.

***

Toushirou Hitsugaya was very, very mad.

It wouldn't be the first time, as anyone who has been in Squad 10 long enough would see that this was typical behavior for him. But you should still keep your distance.

"MATSUMOTO!!!" he bellowed. Where was that damn lieutenant?! He thought. _I don't understand why I keep her!!! _He screamed to himself in his head.

"Yes, Taicho?" A strawberry blonde head popped around the sliding door, with an all too familiar innocent look on her face.

"MATSUMOTO! ALL THESE TIMES I'VE ONLY ASKED YOU TO DO JUST SOME PAPERWORK SO WHY THE HELL DON'T YOU DO IT????" he yelled. He was so mad that he didn't even get to enjoy his lieutenant's scared expression.

"But Taicho—"

"NO BUTS! THE ONLY BUT WILL BE WHEN YOU GET YOUR SAKE ADDICTED _BUTT _OVER HERE AND DO YOUR PAPERWORK!!!"

With a sigh, Rangiku went to do what her captain asked.

It was many hours later, and Rangiku was still doing her paperwork under the sharp and watchful eye of her stern captain. At last, she put down her brush.

"Aaaahhhh!!!!!" she yawned, stretching. "That was _so_ boring! Let's go to a hot spring, eh Taicho?"

"Go by yourself," Toushirou grumbled.

"Ah, you're no fun!"

"Quit your whining and—"

At that moment a black butterfly silently fluttered into the room.

"A Hell Butterfly?" Rangiku said. She put her hand up and the butterfly landed on her finger.

"A message to Hitsugaya-taicho and Matsumoto-fukutaicho of Squad 10. Please report to the Captain-Commander's office immediately. That is all." With that, the butterfly flew off.

"I wonder what that's all about," Rangiku wondered along with her captain.

***

I know, I know, it's a short chapter. A _really _short one. But I had to start out somewhere, right? I'll be posting a few more chapters soon, so please review and give me some friendly suggestions, 'kay???


	3. First Glance

**

* * *

**

***Hello again everyone.

**I've actually have other chapters to this fanfic already done. I just want to see how people react to it first before I go any further.**

**An explanation before you read on: this story will be changing points of views...often I should say. The author note you're reading right now is actually an edited version than the previous one. I don't _like _to have my story like this, but in order to stay consistent I kept it this way. I am so switching to third person after this..... Most of the story will be in the main character's POV, but a line means the POV switched to third person. I did this because sometimes I want to put my readers in my OC's shoes and hopefully catch a glimpse of what it's like for her. Enjoy.**

* * *

I sighed. Another day to live through.

As usual, I didn't tie my hair up when I got up from bed. My long, white hair curtained my face, hiding my most vulnerable point. I could see well enough.

There was another reason why I didn't tie my hair up. I knew that if I kept it in my face like that, people would be less likely to approach me. I didn't want anyone to approach me: I was too dangerous. I could kill them all so easily…

My name is Aria Miyamoto. I was raised in the lower class of the Rukon district, so I had to learn to toughen up. It was there, that my heart began to darken…

Ever since I could remember, I had a special connection to plants. I could speak to them, I could make medicines from them that no one else could, and the most significant, I could control them. I could make a new flower bloom from the ground in less than a minute. I could summon spiked vines and attack someone with them, and much, much more.

My zanpakutou manifested shortly after I entered the Academy. Her name is Kurobararyu, Black Rose Dragon. It allows me to control plants to a more powerful extent than before it manifested. I just wish…

The warning bell chimed, and I hurried to my class.

"Class, today is an important day." My teacher began.

I looked out the window as he began to talk. I didn't think what he said was important. Even the teachers here stayed away from me.

"Today is the day that a captain from the 13 Court Guards will come and inspect our Academy. So be on your best behavior today."

At this, I slowly raised my head. An inspection? I've never seen one done before. What would they do? I suspected my classmates were thinking the exact same thing as they whispered to each other. No one bothered talking to me.

"Sensei, which captain will be inspecting us?" one of my classmates asked. I didn't know his name. I didn't really bother knowing names.

"Toushirou Hitsugaya-taicho and his fukutaicho, Rangiku Matsumoto," he replied.

Another murmur went through the class.

Captain Hitsugaya? The prodigy? I pondered this and something stirred in my heart. What was it? Anticipation? Excitement? Something along those lines.

I knew all the captains in the Seireitei quite well, but out of all of them Captain Hitsugaya was my favorite. I guess it was because he had white hair just like mine, or maybe the fact that he was about my height that piqued my interest, but I couldn't put my finger on it. Still, I couldn't deny the fact that I was looking forward to actually seeing him in the flesh.

"The captain and his lieutenant will be arriving around two o'clock, so be prepared! That is all," the sensei dismissed us.

Everyone got up and filed out of the class, talking with their friends. I got out of my chair and began walking to the door alone.

"I can't wait to see Captain Hitsugaya! I've heard he's super cute!" a classmate giggled.

"Yeah, I'm hoping to catch his eye while he's here," her friend responded.

"Ooh, who do you think _will _catch his eye?"

"Well, I can tell you this: it definitely will _not _be the Witch. Got it?"

When I heard this, something sharp pierced my heart, but I quickly stifled the feeling. Emotions would do me no good.

Ever since I entered the Academy, I had gotten the nickname of the Witch. Whether it was from my expertise with plants or maybe the way I acted, I never knew. Either way, the nickname was always laced with hate and fear whenever the word was mentioned. And still, it hurt.

It probably hurt because deep in my heart I agreed with them. I agreed that a captain would never acknowledge a monster like me. I'm a freak. I don't belong here.

I sighed quietly and went out to eat my lunch.

* * *

"Isn't this exciting, Captain?" Matsumoto asked excitedly.

Toushirou begged to differ. He was surprised when Head Captain Yamamoto gave him the assignment of inspecting the Soul Reaper Academy. He really didn't want to come back here, where all the bad memories were…

"Where do you think we'll go first, eh, Captain? I don't even know if I know my way around anymore! Do you think they'll let us have a guide, Captain? Do you?"

"Matsumoto, shut up for once," Toushirou barked.

They began walking up the large path toward the main gates to the Academy was. When they began to get near it, Matsumoto finally quieted and reverted into her lieutenant personality. They stopped just outside the gate.

"Let's just get this over with," sighed Toushirou. With that, the gate began to open.

* * *

I hurried toward the front of the Academy. I had lost track of time, and now I was afraid that I wouldn't get a good view of the captain and his lieutenant.

I was a bit late. There were already hundreds of people crowding around the path. That wasn't about to stop me.

"Excuse me. Let me through please," I said quietly as I pushed my way through the crowd. The people closest to me instinctively shied away, so I got through to the front of the crowd without trouble. Well, being feared had its good points I suppose.

I waited quietly in my place, trying my best to be invisible. Suddenly, loud murmurs shot through the crowd.

"They're opening the gate!" a voice cried out. I stuck my head out in anticipation.

The great doors slowly began to part. Groans and creaks emanated, adding to the suspense. The whole crowd, surprisingly, was silent, awaiting the arrival of revered Soul Reapers. Anticipation hung heavy in the air.

Then, in the distance, two dark figures were walking towards us, getting closer and closer. At their appearance the crowd began to get animated again. I clasped my hands together tightly, awaiting the captain's arrival.

* * *

Toushirou was not surprised when the students of the Soul Reaper Academy began whispering and even cheering when he began walking on the pathway towards the building. He was irritated at his lieutenant's sudden pleasure at all the attention though.

"Hi there! Nice to meet you all!" she said, waving.

"Quit making a fool of yourself, Matsumoto," Toushirou ordered shortly.

It continued like that for a while. Toushirou ignored it for the most part, while Rangiku was practically bathing in it. Then, when the captain and his lieutenant were getting close to the Academy, he felt a strange and powerful reiatsu coming from the side. He risked looking; only moving his eyes, to his left.

There, he saw her.

He only made eye contact for a moment, but that was enough to get a good look at her. The person with the powerful reiatsu was a girl, with surprising long _white_ hair that hung before her face. She had the most piercing green eyes he had ever seen, and they were looking straight at him. And he had to admit, she was pretty, in a way. Her eyes widened ever so slightly when she realized that he was looking at her, but still she continued to look. Toushirou quickly looked away and continued walking. But the girl's presence continued to occupy his thoughts.

* * *

*****Another chapter has come and gone. Now Aria and Hitsugaya have finally seen each other. (I don't really count it as a meeting becuase they only looked at each other for a split second.)**

**Please, please, PLEASE review. I'd like to know that people are _actually_ reading my stories, thank you very much.**

**I hope no one minds if I call Hitsugaya by his first name in the story. It's just that it's so much easier to type! **

**If you guys have any suggestions on anything, for example the Japanese name of Aria's zanpakutou (best translation I could think of. sorry, my japanese is very bad) or something else, please review. PLEASE.**


	4. File

*****This is an edited version of the original. There isn't much difference between the two, but if you read my reviews you'll see why I changed some details. Urg!!! Even now just thinking about the things I changed makes we want to bang my head on the table!!!! Stupid past me! **

**And just so that I don't forget: Updated 7/10/09 (This is only for my personal reference.)**

* * *

At last, the door closed behind them. Toushirou exhaled with hidden relief.

"That was fun, wasn't it, Captain?" Rangiku prompted, seeming to enjoy her time in the spotlight. Toushirou merely grumbled.

"Welcome Captain Hitsugaya and Lieutenant Matsumoto," a man greeted. He was a teacher, from the looks of him. "I am Akito Miyagi, the principal, and I will be your guide today. Please, come this way." He gestured them into a room and they went in.

"Welcome to the Soul Reaper Academy. May I offer you some tea?"

"No thank you, Miyagi-san. We are strictly here on business," Toushirou replied stiffly before Rangiku could reply.

The teacher nodded and said, "What would you like to review first?"

Toushirou knew exactly. "The students. Are there any…interesting ones?"

To his surprise, the principal frowned. "Well…" he said.

"Is there a problem?"

"No, no! No problem at all! It's just that…" he trailed off, going off and rummaging in some cabinets. He pulled out a file and placed it on the desk.

"This is the list of the most gifted students we currently have in the Academy. Look through them if you wish," he explained rather uncomfortably. Toushirou pondered this as he sifted through the papers.

All was quiet until Rangiku cut in, "Look, Captain! That girl!"

Indeed, it was the same girl Toushirou spotted in the crowd. The picture was the same, only her hair wasn't in her face as much.

"Aria Miyamoto…" he read. He didn't notice how the principal shifted rather nervously as he said the name.

"Born in the 60th Rukon district… Born December 17th…" he paused. He continued on, but there wasn't much left to read.

"Can you get me the file on this student?" he asked. This time he spotted how uncomfortable the principal was.

"Yes, of course, right away sir," he mumbled. He went over to another cabinet and began rummaging.

Toushirou studied the picture of Aria. This time, the first thing he noticed wasn't her long hair, but rather the expression on her face. Her eyes looked so hard, as though she had been through many hardships, but her face was _sad. _He could instantly read the expression on her face even through her picture. He wondered, what made this girl sad?  
"She has white hair like you, Captain. She looks like you," Rangiku remarked.

Toushirou began to wonder why the principal looked so nervous. Was it because of this Aria? Why would that make him nervous anyway?

"Here you go, Hitsugaya-taicho. The files on Aria Miyamoto." The man handed a surprisingly bulky file.

Toushirou went straight to the part about academics. He could look at personal history later.

"Good grades…Destructive behavior…?" Toushirou mumbled.

"She's an attentive student. She easily gives anyone who challenges her in zanjutsu (swordsmanship) a sound beating. Her shunpo is…adequate, to say in the least. Hand-to-hand combat is something she avoids but she manages. Kido is her second best skill, as she can perform eishohaki (a form of kido where the user skips the incantation but the power is drastically decreased) for quite a few low level spells."

Toushirou listened attentively. A fairly normal student regarding studies but when it comes to her life outside the classroom…

"Captain, look at the section on her zanpakutou," Rangiku suggested.

Toushirou took a look and his eyebrows rose.

"She achieved _shikai _so quickly… Name: Kurobararyu. Hmm, Black Rose Dragon…?"

The principal conspicuously shifted nervously again. Why was he doing that?

"Abilities. Plant manipulation…?"

Akito cleared his throat. "Miyamoto-san is a plant master, I should say. Her control and knowledge of plants is unprecedented. By far, it is one of the most…destructive zanpakutos I've ever laid eyes on."

Toushirou perceived, once again, how the man squirmed whenever they mentioned Aria Miyamoto. And frankly, he was getting irritated from it.

"Miyagi-san, is there a reason that you are uncomfortable?" Rangiku suddenly asked. Toushirou approved. She had uncanny ability to voice his concerns when he didn't want to.

The man sighed. "I knew this would come up eventually. You see, Miyamoto-san is a very special student."

"We can see that, but what exactly do you mean?"

"Well, you see, she's already got quite a reputation before she even entered the Academy."

Toushirou flipped to the part of Aria's history in the Rukon district. He read it with an incredulous expression. He looked up and said, "Accidents?"

Miyagi nodded. "Everywhere she goes she's caused destruction with that plant power of hers. She can summon giant roots from the ground, create rose petal gales, and much more. Even when her sword isn't released she can talk to plants! She's done incredible things with herbs and her gardening abilities are amazing! It's because of that special power that all the students are afraid of her. Even the teachers avoid her if they can help it."

Toushirou furrowed his brow. This was not good.

"What kind of destruction? Surely a plant-based zanpakutou can't cause that much trouble, could it?" Rangiku asked.

Akito gestured toward the file. "Read the part about her history in the Rukon district."

Toushirou and Rangiku browsed through. What the file said was stunning.

"She destroyed half a segment of a small district?" Rangiku said incredulously.

Akito nodded. "Even here she's destroyed many things, but lately she's been docile. She seems to be avoiding fighting entirely. Still, everyone keeps their distance."

Toushirou shut the folder with a snap. Everyone jumped.

"We'd like a tour of the Academy now," he announced.

"Yes sir, I understand. It's just that, being the principal, I'm quite busy, so may I suggest a student guide?"

The captain nodded.

"Wonderful. I will get one of the teachers to—"

"I don't want a teacher. I want Aria Miyamoto to be the guide."

Rangiku curiously looked at her captain. Akito gaped.

"O-of course, sir. Right away." He called for someone, and then sent a messenger.

Rangiku approached her captain. "Captain, why do you want Aria to be our guide?"

Toushirou looked at his lieutenant. "Honestly, Matsumoto, I have no idea."

* * *

*****The reason I changed some details (for those of you who are rereading this for some strange reason) was that I was getting a lot of reviews on this chapter regarding the fact that Aria is becoming a Mary Sue. After reading this chapter again I _really _wanted to bang my head on the table for my stupidity. Later in the story I changed the details but I wanted to stay consistent so I went back. Stupid, stupid, stupid....!**

**And just another thing for personal reference: I updated this when Chapter 18 was put up. Wow...I sure was late. **


	5. Fate or Fumble

Hi everyone! It's me again!

Lots of thanks to **Lord Slayer **for my first ever review! Yay!

I've been given some suggestions, like watching out for my character becoming a Mary Sue. And there's the question for why she causes so much destruction. The answer to those two questions are pretty much the same answer, but you probably will have to wait for the next couple of chapters before you'll know a definite answer. Here's a hint: Aria is sometimes like a sleeping dragon that you _really _don't want to wake up. Now enough with my chattering. Here you go!

Disclaimer: I do NOT own Bleach. Just Aria.

***

I was quite dazed.

I was surprised when I felt my heart pounding as I waited for Hitsugaya-taicho to walk by. It had been so long since I felt that emotion; it felt pretty good.

Then, as he walked by, I was overcome by his reiatsu. It was nothing I had ever sensed before! It was so dense and strong, but most of all, it was cold. I could feel it a mile away if I tried.

And then, for a split second, the captain's eyes locked with mine.

I have no idea how this happened. As I was observing the taicho, he wasn't looking at anyone in particular as he walked down the path. He just looked straight, very composed and stoic. It was as though the crowd wasn't there. His fukutaicho was an entirely different story. She was waving her arms everywhere, smiling this way and that. Her chest was bigger than I expected though; I heard some boys mutter something about it.

But then, as he walked by me, his turquoise eyes shifted toward my direction and his head turned ever so slightly, and he was looking directly at me. My eyes widened; I wasn't expecting him to notice me at all.

But then he looked away and continued walking, again not looking at anyone.

Once he had gone through the door the students dispersed, going back to their classes. I followed suit, marching toward my sword practice class. But the captain's glance still puzzled me.

I was in the middle of practicing my sword swings when I sense someone behind me.

I turned, and realized that it was a messenger.

"Aria Miyamoto-san," he began. I tried to not notice how he cringed slightly when he said my name.

"Akito Miyagi-sama, the principal of the Soul Reaper Academy, would like you to come to his office immediately." With that, the messenger left.

I stood there in shock. Miyagi-sensei wanted me in his office? What did I do? None of the staff here ever approached me for anything good, so I must have done something bad to get summoned there. But wasn't he supposed to be guiding Hitsugaya-taicho and his fukutaicho around the school? Maybe he was getting someone else to do it so he could talk to me personally. My shoulders slumped as I sauntered toward his office.

I guess I was getting into a bad mood. Maybe it was because Miyagi-sensei wanted me in his office, or something else. Either way, seeing the looks everyone gave me became too much. I decided I wouldn't walk to the principal's office; I would shunpo there.

I zipped around some corners, taking a shortcut so that I wouldn't bother any of the other students. I took extra care to make my steps as quiet as possible but tried to be quick about it at the same time. And in less than 10 minutes I was getting very close to the office.

I only had a few more feet to go, so I decided to give one last burst. I thrust my foot backwards so I could end up right in front of Miyagi-sensei's door in only one step.

I was in the middle of that step when I realized that there was someone in front of me.

It was too late to stop now. In other cases I would have stopped immediately, but this had taken me completely by surprise. I tried my best to stop, but it wasn't enough.

I then collided.

"Oof!" I choked as I made contact. We went down and I heard our bodies crashing into the floor. There was a moment that we lay there, stunned. Then I raised my head.

"I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to crash into you, I was just—"

I stopped sharply when I took a good look at the person I had crashed into.

Spiky white hair. Turquoise eyes. And a very, very chilly reiatsu.

I had just crashed into Toushirou Hitsugaya-taicho.

Not only did I crash into him, I was also hyperaware that I was right on top of him as well; we were so close that our noses were nearly touching. He blinked at me.

My mind sprang into action. I pushed myself up, lurching. Within a second I was standing, aghast.

"I'm terribly sorry, Hitsugaya-taicho! I was just on my way to Miyagi-sensei's office, and I wasn't being careful with my shunpo so I just kind of crashed into you. I'm so sorry! I—"

"Baka."

That was what Hitsugaya-taicho had said. I cringed, awaiting a punishment.

"You don't have to apologize like that. I know you didn't do it on purpose."

That was definitely _not _the response I was expecting. I looked up and I spotted the captain looking away from me with a hand on his forehead. Then he looked back at me.

"Are you Aria Miyamoto?"

I jumped, and spluttered, "Yes sir!"

Hitsugaya-taicho looked toward the other side and called out, "Matsumoto! She's here."

I looked around. Matsumoto-fukutaicho was here as well? Where was she th—

"RI-CHAN!!!!!"

CRASH.

"GAH!" I exhaled. I was now aware that I was being crushed to something. The next thing I was aware of was that I couldn't breathe. And the very last thing I was aware of was that I was being hugged _very _tightly to Matsumoto-fukutaicho's chest. Not a good situation to be in.

"RI-CHAN! I'm so glad to meet you!" she squealed.

I was barely aware of what she was saying. I was being squeezed to a pulp! I thrashed about, trying to get some air, but Matsumoto-fukutaicho's grip was very strong. I tried to say something, but nothing came out since I had no air.

Slowly, I was getting lightheaded. I heard the lieutenant say something else, but I couldn't make out what it was, and then Hitsugaya-taicho snapping something, and then I realized that I was released from that spine-crushing hold. I keeled over, gasping for air.

"So close…" I breathed. Yeah, so close to dying. And yet, I couldn't get mad at the lieutenant. Frankly, I missed this kind of contact with anyone in particular. It's been so long since I've been hugged…

"Miyamoto-san," a cold voice emanated from the side. My body stiffened, and I turned to look into the cold eyes of Miyagi-sensei.


	6. Inspection

Once Akito had sent the messenger he sat down in his chair and said to the two Soul Reapers, "Make yourselves at home please,"

"We'll wait outside, thank you," the captain replied. He and his lieutenant proceeded to walking out the door.

"I wonder how long it'll take Ri-chan to get over here," Rangiku mused, only a few feet outside the door.

_Ri-chan? _Toushirou wondered. That was so typical of his lieutenant. She hasn't even met the girl yet and already she's got a pet name for her. Despite his cold exterior the captain was really wondering what it would be like to meet Aria. _Why does she look sad? _

"Considering her records, she might just shunpo over here and be here shortly," Toushirou said quietly. "We should watch out for any-"

Suddenly, the captain felt a familiar reiatsu coming towards him. He had only barely turned when something came ramming into him!

With the breath thoroughly knocked out of him, Toushirou couldn't react when he fell to the floor. Thoroughly dazed, he laid on his back for a few seconds before his thoughts unscrambled themselves.

With his head in order, he became conscious that someone was with him on the floor. A head raised at looked at him.

"I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to crash into you, I was just-" She stopped abruptly

Toushirou was shocked to see two emerald green eyes staring back at his turquoise ones. He was very surprised to see how easy they were to read; it was clear that she was surprised at having bumped into him. And once again, the sadness in her face struck him. Up close, he realized she really was pretty, even beautiful, even with that melancholy expression.

He was then very aware that Aria was right on top of him. He blinked at her, unable to respond.

In less than a second Aria leaped up and it was easy to tell that she was panicked.

"I'm terribly sorry, Hitsugaya-taicho! I was just on my way to Miyagi-sensei's office, and I wasn't being careful with my shunpo so I just kind of crashed into you. I'm so sorry! I-"

"Baka," the captain muttered as he stood up. Immediately the girl went silent.

Toushirou was slightly confused at the girl's frantic apologies. It wasn't like she had done anything wrong on purpose. He had seen his own subordinates do worse things than bump into their captain and they didn't even come close to giving such a panicked apology. Is the girl insecure?

"You don't have to apologize like that. I know you didn't do it on purpose."

There was no response from Aria. Toushirou raised a hand and rubbed his head. Then he looked back toward the girl and asked, "Are you Aria Miyamoto?"

"Y-yes, sir!" she squeaked.

"Matsumoto!" he called toward his lieutenant. "She's here!"

He noticed that Aria looked around, trying to find his lieutenant. Where was she? He could have sworn she was around somewhere…

Toushirou felt a small flare of reiatsu from a corner, and he cringed internally. _Oh no, not again…_

"RI-CHAN!!!" Matsumoto squealed. The captain stepped back as he watched Rangiku tackle the student. She then began giving Aria her well known back-breaking hug. He watched in horror and chagrin as Aria began to turn red.

Rangiku squealed a greeting, and Toushirou watched with a twitching eye as Aria turned slightly purple. _I'd better do something before she dies… _

"Ri-chan! I bet the captain has a crush on you since he called you here!" Rangiku chirped.

Toushirou's face turned a faint pink and he snapped, "Stop talking nonsense, Matsumoto, now put her down!"

Rangiku pouted but obeyed. Aria bent over and took deep breaths. Soon her face was beginning to revert back to normal. Toushirou was about to approach her when he felt another presence nearby.

"Miyamoto-san," a flat voice said.

I have always hated this man. Unlike the students, who feared me, Akito Miyagi seemed to hate me for some reason. I had never met him before, but from the moment we met face to face, he has always regarded me with a bone-chilling glare. I fought the urge to shudder and returned his cold eyes with a leer of my own.

"Good afternoon, Miyagi-sensei," I muttered through clenched teeth, bowing. I had a hard time saying "_good _afternoon," as I had no intention of ever giving him good regards. And also I didn't want to get in trouble for giving funny looks to the principal.

"Miyamoto-san, you are to guide Captain Hitsugaya and Lieutenant Matsumoto wherever they want to go, understood?"

"Yes sir," I answered. I was having a hard time not choking out my answers, so I decided to do with something short.

"Good. I will leave you to your duties then. Take your sword with you as well." With that he went back to his office and slammed his door.

ARG!! There were so many things that I wanted to say to that man, and none of them are very ladylike in the least. It was always like this. He would give me short, curt orders that made me feel like I was underachieving or something. I could feel my anger and hatred boiling within me, threatening to overflow…

_Aria. _

That voice! It was Kurobararyu!

_Aria, watch your temper. There are others with you, remember?_

I suddenly recalled that Captain Hitsugaya and his lieutenant were close by. I glanced up and noticed that they were eyeing me curiously.

"Um, if you could excuse me, I'll go, uh, get my sword like he suggested," I stuttered. With a bow I departed toward my dorm.

"Stupid, stupid," I chastised myself as I flash-stepped toward my room. Damn that Miyagi! I didn't want lose my temper here, or ever. His very existence jeopardized that goal.

_You'll have to be more careful, if you don't want this to end like last time,_ Kurobararyu whispered. I winced at the memory.

_I thought entering the Soul Reaper Academy could help with controlling my powers, _I thought. _But I'm not sure if it's helped at all._

_At least you've become conscious of your true potential. Who knows what would have happened if you didn't realize your full power? _

_Gee, thanks. _

_Why don't you talk to anyone anyway? You force yourself into this desolate situation and refuse help from anyone. In a way you brought yourself into this._

But how could I? How would anyone understand the anguish I felt inside? The guilt, regret, and self-disgust I felt at myself?

_Those emotions will only make things worse. You need to socialize._

_Don't you get it? I can't! I'm a coward, alright? Are you happy that I admitted it? My heart…_

Sighing, I opened the door to the dorm that I shared with three other girls. When I had first heard that I would be bunking with others I internally cringed. Luckily, they mostly ignored me and nothing drastic has happened.

_Finally! It's been so long since you've wielded me! You never go to sword practice with me anymore! _Kurobararyu cried out with joy.

_You know why I don't go anymore. If I lost control there it might hinder me graduating, _I sighed in my head as I retrieved my sword on my bed. _I would really hate it if I had to stay here any longer, Kuro. _

Kuro was my nickname for my zanpakutou. She never called me "master" either, but I couldn't care less.

_I guess. But still, I would really like to let loose somewhere. I've been cooped up too long. You have to too, _she sighed.

_Don't even think about that, _I hissed.

_Sorry. _

I tied my sword to my uniform and flash-stepped back to Captain Hitsugaya.

Toushirou looked out a window as he and Rangiku waited for Aria to return.

He pondered what had happened between Akito and Aria. Akito had seemed so cold, and Aria seemed so angry when he had spoken to her. The way she talked to him, it was as if she was spitting out the words. He exhaled. Perhaps spending a little time with her would solve this.

Rangiku looked over her captain's shoulder. "Thinking about Ri-chan again, huh?"

"Shut up and get those stupid assumptions out of your head," he muttered back, agitated. Rangiku giggled but left him be.

Frankly, even he didn't know why he was so interested in Aria. Somehow, he just felt drawn to her. Was it the sadness in her face, or the fact that they were so alike? He really didn't know.

Then he felt a strong reiatsu coming towards him and he looked back down the hallway. Aria was a few feet away, with her head bowed and she was breathing a little heavily.

"I'm sorry…for making…you wait," she panted. She didn't look that much different except there was a long, elegant sword tied to her back.

It was the moment Toushirou comprehended the size of her zanpakutou that he realized that Aria was actually _shorter _than her and had a normal, non-childish mind (*cough, cough,* Yachiru, cough*).

"Wow Ri-chan, you're actually shorter than the captain," Rangiku remarked out loud. Aria looked up at Toushirou and her mouth twitched. Was that supposed to be a smile?

"Let's get going," Toushirou commanded briskly.

"Uh, w-where would you like to go?" Aria asked.

Toushirou looked at her face and was once again struck by the sorrow clearly written on her face, but he shook it off and resumed his businesslike manner.

"The dorms."

And so the inspection of the Soul Reaper Academy began.

***

Here's Chapter 5 for you. Hopefully you've gotten a better look into Aria's head and there might be a hint or two as to some of your questions about her. All will be explained in good time, my dear readers. Keep your reviews up! I don't mind getting good words, questions, or suggestions. I'll update as soon as I can finish and edit Chapter 6!


	7. Sparring

Finally! I'm done with this Chapter! I finally made a nice long one! Well, at least I hope it's long.

Let me tell you, it is not the easiest thing to make transition parts. Seriously, I really want to get to the chase, but I have to type up a part that makes it flow easy! Making those parts are not my strong point.

So, I apologize beforehand if anyone thinks there are too many "filler" scenes in this chapter. Sorry everyone, I did the best I could.

***

I had to admit, guiding Captain Hitsugaya around the school was not as bad as I thought. He told me where he wanted to go and I brought him there, no questions asked. Rangiku-san… That was a bit of another story.

"Honestly, Ri-chan! Why do you keep your pretty hair in front of your face?" Rangiku asked, pulling at my hair.

"Uh, Lieutenant, you're kind of hurting me here…Ow!"

"Sorry, Ri-chan! Hmm, maybe some hair pins!" And out of nowhere she extracts a whole bunch of hair pins.

"Um…"

And with that Lieutenant Matsumoto became my personal hairstylist for the day. Although I didn't really like it that she was pulling my hair this way and that, I didn't complain.

_Why are you letting her mess with your hair like that? _Kuro asked.

_It makes her happy. _

_Even if it causes you pain?_

_Are you implying something here?_

_You're too self-sacrificing for your own good, Aria. Try doing something for yourself for a change. It's not selfish._

_I'm just trying to keep everyone safe. Besides, I don't think I deserve something for myself. _

_Still, you're too self-sacrificing. You don't care if you have to do something that hurts you personally as long as it benefits others. Ever heard of a win-win situation?_

_I don't believe in those, Kuro. Just compromise._

_You don't believe in that either. If you did you wouldn't be a walking lump of misery. You'd at least have some happiness in life. _

I didn't reply to that one.

At last, thank goodness, Rangiku was done with my hair. She had parted my bangs to two sides and then simply fastened each side with…how many pins? I didn't really know.

"Wow, Ri-chan, you have a lot of hair," the lieutenant remarked.

"Uh, thanks…I guess."

"Kido training room, please," Captain Hitsugaya requested.

I made a right, and the two Soul Reapers behind me followed suit.

Big mistake.

I realized that although I took the shortest path to the kido room, I had also picked out the one that had the most students in it. _Suck it up, _I told myself. _The captain and his lieutenant won't like it if there's any delay._

_See! This is exactly what I'm talking about? Why not just take the other path? It's not that much longer!_

I ignored her and trudged bravely into the hall. Well, as brave as I ever could be.

Just as I expected, everyone began to mutter as I walked through with the two captains behind me. Although they stared at the captain and his lieutenant, I could feel most of their stares aimed at me.

"Why is the Witch with them?"

"I can't believe she's actually their guide."

"It must be a fluke. She probably bewitched them or something."

I winced slightly as I heard these comments, but still I went on. I didn't even notice that Captain Hitsugaya and Lieutenant Matsumoto were walking almost right beside me. I was only concentrating on getting through the hall without running.

_It's okay, just a few more steps, _Kuro soothed.

_I don't understand you, Kuro. First you patronize me, now you're trying to make me feel better. Choose one!_

_I have to be both. If I comfort you too much, you'll get overconfident. If I patronize you too much, you'll feel unconfident. I think it's better if I'm a balanced mix. _

I saw the logic in her words and didn't argue.

Once we were out of that blasted hall, I took a deep breath to steady myself.

"Wow, you look green, Ri-chan," Rangiku muttered.

I jumped. I didn't expect anyone to notice. Wait, I turned green??? Never noticed that before…

_I wanted to tell you, but I was afraid you wouldn't react well, _Kuro explained.

"Must be something I ate," I lied. "But I'm a little claustrophobic anyway."

I didn't want to lie, but I had no other way to explain the aversion I had towards other people. I don't really know what would happen if the captain found out about my powers. Would he be disgusted? Scared?

We continued on toward the kido room, and I had a strong sense of foreboding.

"We're getting close to the kido room now," I declared in a quiet voice.

We made a right turn, and now we were on the hall where the door to the kido room was. Normally the room wasn't used but it would be for remedial lessons.

We were nearing the door when I felt a spike of reiatsu coming from the door. It was very familiar, since I had kido classes with the person possessing it. _Oh boy, _I thought.

_Here we go again, _Kuro sighed, sounding forlorn.

I stopped short of a few feet from the door of the room. Captain Hitsugaya and his lieutenant keep walking but stopped a little bit ahead of me.

"Is something wrong?" the captain asked, addressing me for the first time in a while.

The corners of my mouth went up. This situation was one of the few things I found funny here.

"If you don't want to get hurt, I suggest you get a few steps back," I suggested. The captain gave me a confused look but backed up all the same. Rangiku, however, stayed put.

"Oh, come on! What's going on? It can't be that bad!" she complained.

"Matsumoto, if she says get back then get back," Captain Hitsugaya ordered. She obeyed immediately.

With the corners of my mouth still turned up, I looked at the door to the kido room and held up three fingers.

"Three, two, one…" I said, putting down a finger each down I counted down.

KABOOM!!

An explosion shook the ground and red flames shot out of the door, throwing it back and crushing it. Rangiku screamed and leaped back. I glanced at the captain. He had one eyebrow arched down over one eye that was twitching and his eyes were very wide. I bit my lip to keep from giggling.

"Wh…what the heck was that?!" Rangiku gasped.

"That was Suzuki-san. I'm not surprised he's taking remedial lessons. His kido…is a bit _explosive."_

"I'll say," the captain muttered under his breath.

_I don't understand, _Kuro said in my head. _Why is it that they're not afraid of him since his kido is so destructive? Why you?_

_Maybe…because that's his flaw, kido. They can see he's normal, because of that flaw. And besides, he can't bust up doors five times as well as I can. _

_So, why do you have good grades to begin with, if you didn't want to stick out?_

_So I can get out of this wretched place faster._

"I'm going to check if everything's alright…" Captain Hitsugaya proclaimed. He strode over and entered the probably-destroyed room.

_That was…interesting. His explosions are getting smaller at least, _my zanpakutou said.

_Yes… It just goes to show that things can improve over time, however bad they may seem. _

_Do you think that applies to you as well?_

I didn't know the answer to that one.

Once the mess with the kido room was sorted out (which basically means to clear out and let the repairmen handle it), the tour was getting back to normal.

"Let's go to the sparring room," the captain announced.

"Yes sir," I murmured. I walked on, and they followed.

We arrived at the sparring room without another incident like the kido room. I opened the door and gestured the two of them in and I followed suit.

I saw many students in a circle, watching two boys spar. They were only using wooden swords and they leaped back and forth, trying to hit the other. I hid in the shadows and watched them. Click clack, went their wooden swords.

_I wish I was one of those swords. I've been getting bored lately, _Kuro sighed with longing.

_Not now. I really don't want to lose control now of all times. Graduation is coming up and I really want to get out of here. _

The teacher who was overlooking the fight finally noticed Captain Hitsugaya and his lieutenant. It looked like he was a new teacher, since I hadn't seen him before.

"Welcome, Captain. I hope the Academy is up to your standards?" the new teacher asked.

"We'll let you know after we've reviewed everything," Captain Hitsugaya replied coldly.

"Of course. Oh, what have we here?" The teacher peered around the captain, and looked straight at me.

_Crap. _

"You're Aria Miyamoto, correct?" he asked. "You're one of my students this period, aren't you? You should be sparring right about now. I won't let my students slack!" With that he grabbed my wrist and began towing me to the center of the room.

"But I—"

"No buts! I said no slacking, didn't I?"

I looked toward the captain and his lieutenant for support, but all I saw were bewildered looks.

_I thought I didn't have to do any lessons today!_

_If you recall, Akito didn't actually give you permission for a day off, _Kuro explained.

I replayed my short conversation with Miyagi-sensei and cursed mentally.

_You're right. How am I going to get out of this?_

_For goodness sake, just spar for once! I doubt you'd cause any damage. Besides, you could use the practice. _

_I'm not so sure…_

_C'mon! You'll probably scare your opponent anyway!_

_Thanks for sparing my feelings, Kuro._

Still, I was reluctant to spar. I couldn't be sure that I wouldn't lose control.

The sensei pushed me into the center of the room, with my opponent already there. He was almost twice as tall as me, but that shouldn't be a problem. The only thing I didn't like was that when he saw me I noticed that his mouth curled into a sneer.

_We've got another one, _Kuro said.

I desperately hoped that the boy wouldn't give me any trouble. I was concentrating so hard on trying to keep myself in control that I didn't even hear the sensei's introductions, so naturally I didn't know what my opponent's name was.

"Draw your swords, students!" he ordered.

I put up my left hand and extracted my sword. Yes, I was left handed. As I pulled it out Kurobararyu made a very nice, clear ring and it glinted in the sun. I heard nervous murmurs throughout the crowd.

"Oh no, the Witch is going to fight…"

"We should get out of here…"

"Should we tell the sensei…?"

I cringed slightly but held my ground. With a small sigh I held my sword in front of me. And I had to admit, I did feel a twinge of guilt for not using her in so long. The guard was in the shape of a five petal rose, and the hilt had a black and red pattern on it. I waved it around, trying to get the feel of it.

My opponent happened to have a real sword as well. He drew it and hefted it in both hands. Was it just me, or did it looked more menacing than necessary?

"And, begin!"

My opponent charged at me, thrusting his sword forward with full force. I ducked, and tried to get a swipe at his stomach. He managed to block it with his own sword, and then surprisingly, swung his leg toward my head.

What the heck? This was sparring! It was illegal to use any parts of your body that weren't your sword! I was taken so much by surprise that I didn't even have time to block.

The boy's knee made a direct hit to my cheek, I felt a jamming pain, and then I went flying into the wall. The students scampered away skittishly, but I didn't hear any complaints about the foul.

Dazed, I rubbed my cheek, only to realize that he was charging at me again. When he was close enough he raised his sword, and swung down. I flash stepped out of the way just in time.

_What the hell? _I thought. _What's wrong_ _with_ _this guy_?

"Stop! You're not obeying proper sparring conduct! What in the world do you think you're doing?" I heard the teacher shout out. I even saw Captain Hitsugaya and Lieutenant Matsumoto try to get to me, but then my attention was divided and I had to dodge another crazy attack from the boy.

"Isn't it obvious? I'm going to kill the beast!" the boy shouted back.

Everything inside me turned cold. No one had ever called me that to my face before. What would the captain think? I couldn't wonder for long, because the boy swung his sword to my left and I had to block with my sword.

_What do I do??? _I thought feverishly.

_Well, can't you use kido or something to restrain him? _Kuro suggested, sounding just as confused as I was.

_I don't know!!!_

"I'll kill the Witch once and for all!" the boy cried out, attacking again. Pain pierced my heart, and I shuddered. What was wrong with him? Why couldn't he leave me alone?

"Stop!" Captain Hitsugaya's voice rang with authority throughout the room, but it had no effect on the boy.

"You should have gone back to your den, you witch!" he spat.

I don't know what came over me. I shuddered violently, and my thoughts didn't make sense anymore. _A den! I never lived in a den! It's not my fault I have these powers! I'm not a monster!_

Suddenly, I found myself striking back at him. I couldn't control myself. Anger began to boil in my heart, flashing red in my eyes. Self preservation dominated my mind, and the only thing I could think of was attacking the boy.

_Aria, get a hold of yourself! _Kuro hollered in my mind. It had no effect. I had to defend myself against the boy. And to do that, I had to kill him.

"Just like a monster! You'll kill me and bathe in my blood!" the boy shouted in my face. My mouth curled downwards into a snarl and I growled back at him.

_No, Aria! You're not a monster! Don't listen to him! _

I wouldn't listen. Couldn't or wouldn't? Either way, I didn't follow a word Kuro had said. Blind rage filled me. Images flashed before my eyes, accompanied by forgotten emotions. A streak of black hair…loneliness…excitement...fleeting eyes…

And then there were horrific images. Exploding plants…thorns dripped with blood…blood splatters…hateful eyes…destroyed buildings…

Destruction everywhere I looked. Fearful eyes that looked at me. All because of this cursed power.

_Aria, you know you don't want to be a monster! You don't have to listen! Aria! Listen to me! _

I had to get away from the hateful eyes that watched me wherever I went. I had to protect myself. I wasn't a monster… It's not my fault…

In a very small corner of my mind I was vaguely aware that the captain and his lieutenant were trying to stop the fight, but it was too hectic. Anyone who would get caught in the middle would surely be killed.

I kept slashing at my opponent, not even watching out for the other students. Anger made my attacks stronger, and I felt a gruesome satisfaction that the boy was beginning to falter under my attacks. One of my hands let go of my sword and punched the boy in the face. He staggered back a few steps, but didn't stray far.

I attacked him again, and this time he had great difficulty parrying my strikes. But still, he taunted me.

"You'll always be a witch, a monster! You'll never change! NO ONE WILL EVER ACCEPT YOU!!!!" he screamed.

That did it.

My fury peaked, and my body began to tremble. I didn't think, only felt. I raised my sword at about waist height and raised my hate.

"Flare your bloodthirsty thorns, Kurobara—"I began.

_ARIA, STOP!_

"RYU!"

"The room exploded.

***

Bum, bum, bummm.....

Sorry guys, but I just _had_ to put that kido part in there. When I thought about Toushirou's and Rangiku's expressions if they were only a few feet from a deadly explosion, I just started cracking up. I mean, wouldn't you? The expression I envisioned for Rangiku was that her eyes did that shrinking thing they do in the anime where the colored part looks a lot smaller than it looks and her mouth was really open. Not to mention she would be in a body position similar to Ichigo in that Sword Frenzy or whatever it's called special episode when Yuzu went up to his room and Rukia had just barely made it into the closet. I'm giggling right now just thinking about it. And Toushirou, well I hope I described it well enough in the story. I really like the twitching eyebrow thing. Well, at least I think it's funny.

Some questions the reviewers have been asking will probably be answered in the next chapter, but it wouldn't hurt to make inferences in this one. I'm not sure how long the next chapter will, but I will do my best to make it as long as possible!


	8. Transfer

*********I like this chapter. It was really interesting to write about everyone's thoughts like this. Hope you like it! It's just the next chapter that I'm worried about. Hope I can get it long enough....**

* * *

Ever since I could remember, Kuro had been my balancer.

When Kurobararyu had manifested, I had wondered for a while where this benign, encouraging (most of the time) zanpakutou had come from. At that time I was even more lost in darkness, so I didn't think a zanpakutou like her could exist within me.

Then one day when I had been brooding over it for an extremely long time, she told me.

_I was born from the brightest area in your heart. You still have good within you. I manifested because that part of you wanted to so desperately come out that I was born as a result. The darkness within you isn't a part of you, so there's no way that a zanpakutou like that would have been born. _

Those were her exact words. And it was those words that kept me going.

Those words gave me hope, however small, that I could overcome this devastating power and one day actually help people with it, instead of destroying things with it. I had figured out why I was so destructive for a while now.

The answer was my emotions.

Since I felt some emotions more strongly than other people, the "excess" would affect my reiatsu. And since I felt so lonely and angry all the time, my reiatsu gets chaotic. My main issue was my temper. Not only was I very easy to irritate and anger, but the emotion was the one that affected my reiatsu the most. I would get angry the most at the people who shunned me, the people who treated me like I wasn't human, that I couldn't feel pain.

Kuro, on the other hand, she was the half of me that had pleasant emotions. So, if I ever got too angry or sad, she would "balance" my reiatsu with good emotions so nothing drastic would happen. It worked most of the time.

So when I was finally coming to, I was very shocked at what I saw.

Giant tree roots had crushed through the walls of the sparring room, twisted and contorted. They had wrapped around every single person in the room with the exception of my sparring opponent, Captain Hitsugaya and Rangiku-san. Vines with sharp thorns were wrapped around everyone's necks, but apparently there was no blood. The room was completely ruined.

_No one's hurt, _Kuro sighed with relief.

_Kuro, what the hell just happened?! _

_Um… Can I take a pass on that one?_

_Kuro!_

If I was being honest to myself, I probably already knew what had happened. But I just couldn't believe it. Wouldn't believe it.

_Are you sure?_

_Just show me!_

At last, she reluctantly showed me what had happened in the last couple of minutes.

In seconds, images and emotions filled my mind. The boy attacking me…Confusion… Me wildly attacking the boy back…And to finish up, there was a very fierce burst of rage on my part.

_Enough, _I thought.

_Aria…_

_Enough! _

Shame and grief welled up in my chest, and my vision turned blurry for some reason. This was my entire fault. If I hadn't sparred then I wouldn't have lost control _right in front of a captain. _Not to mention I could have killed almost everyone in the room if Kuro hadn't intervened at the last minute. If she hadn't screamed at me to stop, I would have unleashed my full power.

My shoulders sagged and I choked up. I was right. I should have never sparred in the first place. Because of the fact that I couldn't control my emotions I had almost killed everyone in the room.

When I finally admitted this to myself, it was too much. I couldn't bear show my face ever again. So I did the only thing I've ever really done.

I ran away.

* * *

Toushirou could not believe what he was seeing.

He felt a little confused when the teacher had pulled Aria into the fight. Shouldn't that Miyagi have given her the day off? He couldn't do anything when she looked at him for support. He was just as confused as her.

He heard the murmurs around him when Aria was placed in the center of the room.

"The Witch is going to fight…"

The Witch? Why did they call Aria that? And why was it that every time they mentioned her their voices became a fearful whisper?

Those questions were forgotten for a moment when the fight began. The captain was impressed at Aria's agility. It would take a lot more than what her opponent had to hit her with a sword.

But then she got hit with the boy's knee.

Toushirou felt outraged when he watched Aria slammed into the wall with a large purple bruise beginning to surface on her cheek. He shot an icy look at the sensei, who tried to stop the fight, to no avail.

"I'll kill the Witch once and for all!" the boy proclaimed loudly.

Toushirou noticed how Aria shuddered when he said those words. She seemed to have been deeply hurt by those words. He looked around and was furious when he saw that no one in the crowd was going to stop this. They only shied away from the fray.

_What the hell is wrong with these people? _He thought.

"Shouldn't get involved…"

"Don't want to get killed…"

"If he kills her, we'll be safe…"

Didn't these people have any integrity?! It was if they were watching an execution of an innocent person. Toushirou winced as memories of the fight with Kusaka in Central 46 came back to him, but he shook them off quickly. He would have to take matters into his own hands.

"Stop!" he shouted at the boy.

It had no effect whatsoever.

"You should have gone back to your den, you witch!"

The moment he said that, Aria seemed have lost control. She began attacking her opponent back with incredible ferocity. Toushirou reached back to draw his sword.

"Matsumoto," he said.

"Yes, sir!" Rangiku ran forward, drawing her own sword, but suddenly Aria slashed at the boy right in front of her. She yelped and jumped back, with Aria missing and cutting into the floor, sending wood chips flying.

_Dammit, _Toushirou thought. He realized that no one could get into the fray without getting severely injured.

But he had to do something! If he didn't act fast, he could see that people who _didn't _try to stop the fight would get hurt as well. The boy wouldn't be able to withstand Aria's aggressive attacks for long.

"Just like a monster! You'll kill me and bathe in my blood!" the boy shouted.

Toushirou growled. Why couldn't he just shut up? He had to see that he was only making things worse with his hateful comments. Aria continued to slash wildly, seeming to concentrate only on cutting her opponent. The captain wondered what could be going on through her head right now, and tried to stop the fight himself. However, Aria gave off bursts of reiatsu and they blocked him from intervening. He exhaled in frustration. Suddenly, the boy shouted something else.

"You'll always be a witch, a monster! You'll never change! NO ONE WILL EVER ACCEPT YOU!!!!"

Toushirou was shocked when he noticed that Aria's reiatsu was rising fast after that comment. Then he noticed something else. Her reiatsu… seemed to be filled with so much anger and rejection. He could feel those emotions as easily as if they were his own. Now he figured out a little bit of why the girl's face was so sad. She was deeply affected whenever anyone called her a witch or a monster. He couldn't blame her…

Suddenly, the captain realized that she was standing still at one side of the room. Red spiritual energy began streaming out of her, and she raised her sword at about waist height. A feeling of dread possessed him.

"Flare your bloodthirsty thorns, Kurobara_ryu!" _she cried.

Toushirou suddenly realized that he was being thrown out of balance by something. He tumbled away from his place, his vision spinning. He heard loud cracking and bursting of something, most likely wood.

At last he stopped spinning. Very dazed, he lay on the floor while he waited for his head to stop spinning. His vision spun, swirled, and at last stabilized. Groaning, he slowly began to get up when his head bumped into something.

It was a giant root.

Stunned he spun his head around, trying to get a good look at everything. The entire room was filled with giant roots, flowers, and vines with thorns. He noticed that many of the students in the room were wrapped tightly in roots with sharp thorns at their throats, barely touching their skin.

_Did Aria do this? _He thought incredulously. Suddenly reminded of the girl, he looked around, trying to find her. He spotted in the same place she was before she released her zanpakutou, which was strangely untouched by the flood of plants. She was breathing heavily, and seemed surprised at her environment. Getting up, he edged a few steps toward her, not knowing if he should approach her or not. Toushirou watched as Aria's eyes widened at what she saw. He could see tears forming in her eyes, but not falling. Suddenly she bolted from her place, dodging the giant tree roots and running past him.

At one second, Toushirou took a clear look at her face and was shocked. That look, it looked as though she was drowning, and she would die if someone didn't pull her out of that personal hell that she was living in. That look was strangely familiar, yet he couldn't place it…

And then she was gone. Toushirou stared in the direction she had run, wondering what she was thinking.

"Captain?"

He turned around and saw Rangiku standing behind a giant root.

"What should we do, sir?"

"Let's start cutting these roots and get everyone out first, but this room is finished."

Rangiku extracted her sword and swung it at the nearest root. It cut into it, but it wasn't very deep. The lieutenant frowned and slashed again. Once again it barely cut the root.

"These roots… they're very strong," Rangiku noted.

Toushirou placed a hand on a root and was surprised to feel spiritual energy laced through it.

"Normal cutting won't work. You'll have to release your zanpakutou."

"What about you?"

"I'm a captain so I'll use my normal blade but I'll still have to use up some reiatsu for this."

His lieutenant nodded and muttered, "Growl, Haineko." Her blade dissolved into ash and began streaming around the room. Soon, the roots began to collapse.

Toushirou summoned his reiatsu and began slashing at the roots and they too were cut down.

A while later all the students and the teacher were cut down. The students scurried away in terror, murmuring something about "never wanting to cross the Witch ever again." When the teacher was released, he scratched his head but didn't look too unnerved.

"Strange. Miyagi-san didn't say this would happen…" he mused.

"Did the principal put you up to this?" Toushirou asked.

"Yes. He showed me a picture of Aria Miyamoto and ordered me to have her spar with a certain opponent when I saw her. He said it was for training. He didn't say anything about this kind of…_ incident _happening."

The captain was suddenly reminded of Aria's sparring opponent and a surge of hate filled him. Looking around, he spotted the boy still constricted by at least two tree roots. Toushirou cut them down, but he noted that they were a lot tougher than the others and the boy seemed to have some scratches.

Once the boy fell down, the captain grabbed him by the collar and growled in his face, "Why were you saying all those things to her?"

The boy gave Toushirou a look of hate. "She's a monster. She deserves to be killed. It's not my fault she doesn't like hearing the truth."

A fist abruptly came colliding with the boy's face, and he was thrown a few feet, knocked unconscious. Toushirou grit his teeth as he flexed his hand.

"Make sure this boy gets the punishments for lack of respect," he snarled at the teacher. The teacher bowed briskly and went over to the boy.

"What will we do now, Captain?" Rangiku asked.

"We're going to see the principal."

* * *

I felt tears flowing steadily down my face as I ran, but I didn't bother wiping them away. I was too ashamed to do anything but run from my crime.

_It's not your fault, _Kuro muttered.

_I should have been able to control my powers, Kuro! I should have learned to control them when I came here, but I couldn't!_

_It was the boy's fault. He said all those awful things._

_He spoke nothing but the truth. I _am _a monster. I don't deserve to live in society._

_Why don't you ask someone for help to control your power?_

_And risk their lives in the process? This is something that I have to do by myself._

_You are such a masochist, Aria._

I slowed down a bit as she said this to me.

_A…what?_

_You heard me. A masochist. You hurt yourself too much, Aria. You keep everything bottled inside, which hurts yourself. And hurting yourself is the reason why you keep losing control. You need to let go._

I had no response for that. However, I did consider my sword's words as I continued to flee.

Is it true? Did hurting myself only hurt others around me more? Maybe Kuro was right, maybe I did have to get someone to help… But I couldn't bring myself to put someone in danger like that. There was no guarantee that that would work…

_You need more faith, Aria, _Kuro whispered in my mind. Again, I didn't respond.

I wasn't paying attention to where I was going. All I was seeking now was refuge, somewhere to hide, so that I could somehow pretend that the last couple of minutes didn't happen. Now that Captain Hitsugaya witnessed this curse I bore, I don't think I could ever join the Gotei 13, even though I wanted to so much. A sense of hopelessness enveloped me. I didn't know what to do anymore.

I realized that I was in a forested area, where the trees were a lush green and protected all that hid within them. A perfect place for me.

_Aria… _They whispered.

I sighed and tried to find the highest tree to climb into.

_Aria, it's not your fault…_ They murmured to me. I gritted my teeth, trying to ignore them. But it was hard, considering that I could talk to plants and whenever they spoke their voices their presences practically overtook my mind. Not to mention whenever I walked into a place like this, the plants knew exactly what I was thinking.

_Aria, let go of your anguish. It's not your fault. Join us…_

_It's not your fault…_

_Join us…_

_It's not your fault…_

"Shut up!" I roared, aggravated. "You don't know me! Leave me alone!"

At last, the forest was silent. The way it should be if I didn't have this curse.

_A masochist, as usual, _Kuro said.

_Stop calling me that. I am not a masochist. _

_Yes you are. And nothing you say is going to change my mind. _

I stepped in front of a tree trunk and looked up. Branches were entangled together, and the top wasn't in any place that I could see yet. I reached up and began to climb.

* * *

Toushirou stormed into Akito Miyagi's office like a bull. The man abruptly stood up from his chair.

"Captain, is there anything I can do for you?" he asked, appearing concerned.

"Yes. I want you to transfer Aria Miyamoto straight into Squad 10," the captain ordered.

The principal stood there, shocked, then composed himself enough to ask, "May I ask why?"

"That is none of your concern. I want her transferred immediately, as in _right now." _

"Um, of course sir, but…"

"Is there a problem? She has the required grades, so she was going to transfer into the Gotei 13 anyway."

"But, the graduation ceremony…"

"A ceremony will only complicate things. I thought that the Academy didn't exactly invite Miyamoto-san's presence here." Toushirou gave the principal a cold look.

Flustered but obedient, the principal extracted some papers and a pen and began scribbling things down.

"O-of course, sir. Right away," Akito stuttered.

"Good. See to it that there are no issues with transferring her. Contact me when you are finished. I will escort Miyamoto-san off the premises myself." With that the captain strode briskly out the door.

His lieutenant was waiting for him on the other side, obviously eavesdropping.

"Captain, I really don't understand. Why is it that you're so attached to Ri-chan?" she asked, using Aria's nickname out of habit.

The boy quietly stared out the window for a few moments. Then he looked up and muttered, "That girl… She's reminds me of Hinamori."

"Ah," the lieutenant said, understanding. She knew that anything connected with the Fifth Squad's lieutenant would automatically attract her captain's attention.

"Now, whenever I remember Miyamoto-san, she reminds me of Hinamori, at the time when Aizen faked his death," Toushirou murmured, saying the former captain's name with hate. "That look on Hinamori's face, it looked as though she was drowning."

The captain stared off into space once more, thoughts beginning to form in his head. That look that Hinamori bore on her face, it still haunted Toushirou. He still couldn't erase the guilt that reminded him that he couldn't protect his closest friend. He wouldn't fail this time, not again.

* * *

The moment I got into a comfortable position in the tree, I began to cry in earnest. And yet I was getting mad at myself for crying, for showing weakness, but I couldn't hold it in. How could I have let this happen? How was it possible that I had lost control, when I had worked so hard for it? I pounded my fists against the tree trunk, ignoring the biting pain. My reiatsu began to pour out uncontrollably, causing more plants to grow around my sanctuary. Now I would never become a true Soul Reaper. I was just about ready to scream.

"Ri-chan?" A familiar voice called out from below.

* * *

Once the transfer arrangements were made, Toushirou and Rangiku began their search for Aria.

"Where can we find her? She ran out and I don't think anyone would pay attention to where she would go," Rangiku mused.

"We can track her down by her spiritual energy. It leaks so we should be able to follow it easily," the captain replied.

And it was true. There was a prominent trail of Aria's reiatsu that led out of the Academy.

"Ri-chan really needs to control her reiatsu," the lieutenant remarked.

"Maybe it's because she can't."

"Sir?"

Rangiku looked at her captain curiously. He was using a tone of voice that meant he had something on his mind, and his face looked like it.

"Hmm…"

They continued to follow the obvious trail out of the building and into the forest. The trail began to wind around trees, not making any recognizable pattern, as though it was searching for something or lost. The two decided to use shunpo to follow the trail and in minutes they found the end of the trail, at the base of a huge tree.

Rangiku looked up and said, "She's still here. Ri-chan?"

There was no response, so she stepped forward and flash stepped up the tree, using the branches as steps. At the top of the tree, cradled in a wide branch, was Aria, curled up. Her piercing emerald eyes were staring right where the woman appeared, as though she was expecting her.

"Hi there, Ri-chan," Rangiku greeted quietly. She noticed with sadness that there were tear streaks running down the girl's face. Aria blinked, but made no audible response.

"Matsumoto," a quiet but firm voice called from under Rangiku. She looked down and Toushirou stepped up.

"I need to talk to her. Get back to the Academy and wait for me."

"Understood."

Rangiku left, thus leaving the two behind.

Toushirou slowly took a small step toward Aria, but she scooted away an inch, eyeing the boy as though he was a snake about to strike.

"I won't do anything. I just want to talk," Toushirou coaxed as he moved closer. This time Aria did not scoot away, but she continued to leer at the captain.

Toushirou stopped just a few inches from where Aria sat, not knowing how to continue. Aria continued to stare at him, giving him a look that clearly said, _Okay_, _I'll humor you and hear what you have to say. _

They stayed there for a few moments, but then she cleared her throat, which startled them both, and croaked, "What do you want, Captain?"

"I just wanted to tell you some good news."

Aria stared him down intensely. He noted that.

"Good for you at least. You won't be attending the Soul Reaper Academy any longer. Starting today, you'll be a Soul Reaper in Squad 10."

Aria's eyebrows rose all the way up to her forehead but didn't say a thing. Toushirou knew what she was thinking. He sighed and continued, "I'm not joking. You'll be transferred today so you should get your things. You have the necessary requirements so there won't be any trouble."

Aria wrapped her arms tightly around her knees and looked down. After a few moments she looked up and whispered, "But… I still can't control my power…"

Toushirou knew what she meant. He had reviewed her files again a few minutes ago and realized that although she had good grades, all the teachers' notes said, "Lacks precise control." And from what he had just seen, he knew that it would take a lot to control that kind of raw power. He inched closer and looked Aria straight in the eye. What should he do now? He thought frantically. He couldn't just tell it to her straight. He took a clear look at Aria, and suddenly remembered that she was actually _smaller _than him. Hesitantly, he reached his hand up and gently rested it on Aria's white head.

"I know what you can do, and I can see what happens to you if you make mistakes," he started. Aria seemed shocked at the close contact between them, but she looked down when she heard him say that.

"I can see that, and I just want to say… that I'll help you. I can help you control that power. It's not impossible. Just takes time."

He could see that the girl was clearly staggered, completely derailed. Her shoulders slumped and she blinked repeatedly.

"You'll… help me?" she whispered. "You'll actually… help me control my power?"

"Yes, I can. Just… trust me."

_

* * *

_

Just trust me.

I could tell from his face and tone that he wasn't kidding.

I was completely, utterly astonished. This was definitely not what I had in mind.

It was definitely not what I was expecting that a captain, an actual captain, would offer to help me control my power. Me. The witch, the monster.

At first I was thinking, what was wrong with him? Couldn't he see what he was doing? It was suicide, offering to help someone as dangerous as me.

And then, as the seconds passed, I realized that I was lying to myself. I was forcing myself to think those thoughts, so that maybe I could distance myself from him, to keep him safe. Then I realized that I really wanted this. I had been alone for so long that I was desperately craving this, craving for company and… for a friend.

I argued with myself. The parts of me that decided what was right and what I wanted warred inside my head. The two sides were equally strong; I couldn't make a proper decision.

_Go ahead, Aria. You need this, _Kuro put in.

_But… I can't trust myself enough to not be able to hurt him. _

_Didn't you hear what he said? Trust him. If you trust him, then you can trust yourself. You do trust him, don't you?_

_I…guess. _

_Then do it Aria. It's both right and what you want. It's a win-win. _

Kuro's words slowly sunk in, and I hesitantly made my decision.

"Okay," I breathed. "Okay, I'll do it."

Captain Hitsugaya's mouth flashed a small smile, and he rubbed my head a little before holding it out to me. "Let's get out of this tree then."

I stared at it as though it was something I'd never seen before.

He sighed and said, "This won't work if you don't trust me."

"Do… do you promise… that you won't…call me a monster…and…abandon me?"

It was as though my mouth had moved on its own. I clapped my hand over my mouth and looked down.

"Miyamoto-san, look at me."

I didn't want to, but apparently my face had a mind of its own as well.

To my surprise, the captain's face wasn't that icy glare that he constantly used. Actually, it was… a little soft.

"I promise I won't hurt you," he muttered.

It wasn't until I noticed that my hand had somehow wrapped around his that I realized that I truly believed him.

"Let's get your stuff then," the captain said, his voice returning to the icy tone he usually used. Gripping my hand firmly but gently he slowly led me out of the tree.

Not too far off, inside the Academy, two people were talking on the phone.

"So everything went according to plan?" one said.

"Yes sir. Everything went without a hitch."

"Excellent. We will have everything we need. Soon everything we've worked for will fall into our hands..."

* * *

*****Yay! Done!**

**Like I said before, I really need to make these chapters longer. No idea how many can fit into one fanfic on this thing....**

**The next chapter might be a little messy, so it might take a while before I get it on here.**


	9. Sunsets and Ribbons

***Hi everyone! My new chapter is out! Oodles and bundles of thanks to **Butterfly****. Love. Mikomi. **for beta-ing this!

Random question: has any of you ever wondered how old Shiro-chan (I hope he doesn't mind me calling him that) is? Heck, how old _all _the Soul Reapers--besides Rukia and Ichigo--are? They never really say anything about that. Anyway, enough with my hyper chattering. Hope you like it!

* * *

For the second time that day, I was in a daze.

I felt a strange high as I packed my things while Captain (_my_ captain!) Hitsugaya and his lieutenant waited outside. Not only did he notice _me _out of all the students, but now I was actually going to become a Soul Reaper under him! I couldn't be more ecstatic.

I tied Kurobararyu over my left shoulder so that it was vertical against my body and my small pack over the other so my hands could be free.

I ran out to greet the captain and lieutenant, who eyed my small bag critically but said nothing.

"Let's go. Matsumoto still needs to finish her paperwork," Captain Hitsugaya grumbled.

"Ah, but Captain! I was hoping we could take the day off and show Ri-chan around!"

"You've already had the whole day off from the inspection, Matsumoto! Get your work done!"

I quietly watched the two Soul Reapers bicker with each other as we walked out of the Academy. The halls were unusually quiet, as though we were sealed off from everyone else. As we strode out the door and outside, I took a glance at the sky. It was sunset. The sky was a pale blue with brushes of gold near the horizon. The sun was a giant half-orb of red light, with purple, orange and red color glowing out of it. There wasn't a cloud to be seen in the sky. It would soon be a cloudless, starry night; a twilight, almost. My favorite.

The captain noticed me observing the sky. "Do you watch the sunset?"

I jumped, not expecting him to notice. But then again, I should expect no less from a captain. "Not really. I prefer watching sunrises instead. Or the stars. Sunsets…feel kind of melancholy to me."

But not today. I enjoyed watching sunrises and the stars because sunrises symbolized new beginnings to me, while the stars reminded me that even though there are some things we can't see that doesn't mean they're not watching over us. Sunsets were the opposite. They were like endings to me. And today, they really were. The ending of my time in the Academy, and soon the beginning of my career as a Soul Reaper. A fresh start. I hoped it would be a good one.

"Hmm," the captain mused. "Well, we should get going. We're late enough already. Do you mind if we used shunpo?"

I shook my head.

"Good. Let's get moving, then." With that he disappeared.

"Catch us if you can, Ri-chan!" the lieutenant goaded playfully. And then she too, disappeared.

"H-hey!" Thoroughly caught off guard, I rushed after them.

* * *

Half an hour later Toushirou, Rangiku and Aria were sauntering through the halls of the Squad 10 barracks. Rangiku was happily chattering to a disgruntled Aria about things that the captain didn't really care about. Whether it was because they had left her all alone to get to the barracks or because she had arrived much after them, he didn't really know.

"Oh, here we are, Ri-chan! Your room!" Rangiku announced.

The trio stopped in front of a door and Aria gestured toward it. "This is…mine?"

"Didn't you hear what I just said? Yup! All yours! And you won't be sharing it with anyone, _right?_" Rangiku emphasized in Toushirou's direction.

Catching on quickly, the captain coughed and said, "We don't want to attract attention about you before the graduation and because of your current….situation you won't be sharing this room with anyone."

Aria had already opened the door to her new room.

"Wow, it's…big."

Rangiku piped in, "Only if you're not sharing it with anyone. Otherwise it seems real crowded."

Toushirou cleared his throat. "We'll let you get settled before we show you around. Let's go back to the office, Matsumoto."

"Ah, we have to work so soon? Why can't we go eat something?"

"I know you just want to drink your head off again. I'm not falling for that one."

"No, no, Captain! I meant Ri-chan! Shouldn't she go eat something?"

Toushirou looked pointedly at the new recruit, allowing her to decide.

Aria fidgeted. "Um… I guess I should eat something… okay, sure."

"Alright! Lemme tell you something, Ri-chan, the food here is a wholly lot better than the Academy's! Let's go!" Rangiku swept Aria away with one arm and drove her off. Toushirou sighed and followed.

"So, Ri-chan, what do you think? It's good, right?"

Rangiku, Toushirou and Aria were all sitting around a table. Aria was sipping noodles under the watchful eye of the lieutenant and the captain was looking off into the space.  
"Mmm," Aria mumbled, mouth full of noodles.

"Well, I'll leave you here to finish up. I'm leaving." Rangiku suddenly rose out of her chair and dashed off.

"Mmm?" Aria looked up and stared after the retreating lieutenant.

"Hey! Get back here, Matsumoto, I know you're just trying to get out of doing paperwork!" Toushirou leaped up angrily and chased after her, not noticing a frightened Aria.

Toushirou marched out the door, cursing under his breath as he strutted a few steps out the door. Suddenly, something shot out and grabbed, covering his mouth and pulling him into a corner.

"Mmmph!!!" Toushirou tried to scream, a hand smothering his mouth.

"Sssshh! It's just me, Captain!" a voice said in the darkness, releasing Toushirou.

"Matsumoto? What was that for?"

"You're coming with me, Captain!"

"Where are we going?"

"We're going shopping! Aren't you excited? Let's go!" Rangiku squealed in an excited voice. She began dragging her young captain off.

"W-what? No, wait, Matsumoto! Lemme go! Geez!"

_

* * *

_

Do not panic. Do not panic.

I said these words over and over again in my head like a mantra, trying desperately to calm down.

I mean, it's not like the captain and lieutenant left me on purpose, right? They wouldn't leave me alone with other people, right?

I really didn't have anything to be afraid of. No one knew me here; no one could hurt me here. That's what I keep telling myself over and over again, but I'm not sure if it's working.

I wasn't sure what time it was, but it must have been dinnertime here as other Soul Reapers began gathering where I was. Luckily I was in the corner so no one took note of me, but it would only be a matter of time. I swear I was having a panic attack.

I finished the rest of my noodles mechanically, without tasting them. _Where were they? _I thought frantically. Glancing at the clock, I grimaced when I saw that they had been gone for over 45 minutes. I debated within myself whether or not I should return to my room. I decided at last to return to my room, since it would be good practice and I might just go explore a bit. _Might_.

I tried as inconspicuously as I could to exit the room. I prayed that no one would take particular interest in me, but because of my height _and _my hair my hopes weren't that high. However to my advantage the halls were a little dark, so my hair wouldn't be a problem. Now if I could just sneak around unnoticed…

Before I knew it I was in front of the door to my room. I guess I was so preoccupied with _trying_ to be sneaky that I hadn't noticed that I was already here. Sighing, I reached for the doorknob. Looks like that's the last I'll see of the captain and the lieutenant for today…

"RI-CHAN!!!!"

I was starting to notice a pattern here. Quickly, I tried to get out of the way, but unfortunately for me the lieutenant was very fast. She slammed into me a second time that day and crushed me to her chest, swinging me back and forth.

"Ri-chan! We're back! Did you miss us?!"

Oh, _now _they get here, I thought forlornly. But then again, maybe it was better that I was alone. Less conspicuous. But my thoughts were quickly erased as I was once again being suffocated.

"Lieutenant…" I wheezed.

"Oops, sorry!" She immediately dropped me and I nearly did a face plant into the floor. Fortunately I managed to get my head in order in time to get my feet where I wanted them.

"Sorry for taking so long to get back, Ri-chan! The captain and I went shopping!"

Shopping? For what? I took a quick look at the captain's face then turned around again. His face was almost comical; he looked like he had just been put through the worst torment of his life.

"Oh, and you don't have to call me Lieutenant all the time, Ri-chan! Just Rangiku-san will do! We'll be the best of friends now!" She smiled widely at me.

I felt very warm inside. The lieutenant, no, Rangiku-san, wanted to be my friend. My _friend. _There were no words to describe this moment. I had a friend. A _friend. _I kept repeating that over and over in my head. I suddenly had the urge to just run around, yelling it to the whole world. Rangiku-san would be my friend! And I couldn't help it; I smiled a little right back at her. The first time I smiled in a long time.

"Yes, Lieute—"

"What was that?"

"I mean, Rangiku-san."

She smiled even wider. "Oh, and I almost forgot! The captain and I got a present for you! _Both _of us!" She patted her uniform for a few moments, and while she was I wondered curiously what they got me. At last she extracted something small and put her hand into my palm, with a, "Hope you like it!"

When she removed her fist, I took a good look at the gift. It was a small black felt box wrapped in a purple ribbon. I carefully pinched one side and pulled slowly. Heck, I don't care if I'm being too dramatic. It had been a while since I had gotten any gifts from anyone actually, and they weren't even half this nice. I took the ribbon off and opened the black box. I stared into it in wonder.

Inside were two of the prettiest ribbons I've ever seen. They were set next to each other, coiled up, and they were a deep, soft purple. At a snail's pace I reached in and pulled one out, examining it as though it was something I had never seen before.

"The captain and I got these for you because we didn't want to have all that hair covering up that pretty face of yours, now did we? These seemed better than hairpins because you don't need a lot of them. Speaking of which, where were the ones that I gave you earlier…? Oh yeah, and we also got you some Soul Reaper uniforms…"

Realizing what she said, I groped the hair in front of my face. Strange, I guess I never noticed when the pins came off. They must've have been blasted off when I…

"You'll wear them though, right?"

I looked up at Rangiku's expectant face. In her arms were some sets of Soul Reaper uniforms that looked like they would fit me. I took them from her, cradling them in my arms. Even though we had only known each other for a day, I already felt very close to her.

"Yeah, I'll wear them."

She beamed at me and stepped back. "I'm so glad! See, I've always wanted to do something with white hair, because it matches with practically everything, but before you came along the captain wouldn't let me get near him!"

"Try it and you die," the captain growled in a low tone.

"Haha, don't worry, Captain, now Ri-chan is my guinea pig—I mean, friend. Well, see you in the morning then, Ri-chan!" With a wave the lieutenant began ambling off.

Captain Hitsugaya, however, stayed in his spot for a while. I looked at him, wondering why he wasn't following his lieutenant. He turned around, but then looked back at me.

"Come to my office immediately tomorrow morning."

Once he had explained to me where it was he turned around briskly and started walking away with a stiff, "Good night."

Glancing down at the gift Rangiku-san and the captain gave me I was suddenly filled with a deep sense of gratitude and… was it happiness? Either way, I hadn't felt so warm in a long time. I looked back at the captain's retreating figure and smiled.

"Good night to you too, Captain, and…thank you."

And with that I swiftly turned and closed the door of the room that now belonged to me.

The next morning I was standing right in front of the office's doors.

Finding it wasn't that hard with the captain's instructions. I had gotten up to the bright sunshine of the morning. True to my word, I had worn the ribbons that Rangiku-san gave me, which I had to admit, they do look very nice. Kurobararyu was tied around my left shoulder, though I wasn't sure if I would need a sword now. The halls were oddly quiet this morning, again. Shouldn't there be people up and about at this hour?

I stopped in front of the sliding door to the captain's office. I took a deep breath and grasped the handle. Don't worry, it's just the captain and Rangiku-san behind that door, I thought to myself.

But then I chickened out. I took my hand away and began pondering my head how I should enter. Should I knock, or should I just open the door right away? Or maybe I should just "happen" to come by and notice the door. Oh gosh, how am I supposed to go on like this???

_Just knock, _my sword ordered in a tired tone.

Hesitantly I reached up my hand and tapped the door.

No response.

_Knock harder! Oh for the love of..._

Frantically I pounded my fist on the frame of the door, not realizing until it was too late that I had hit too hard and that there was a tiny dent on it. I cursed myself for not being more careful.

"Come in," a voice said from the behind it.

Relief washed over me as I realized that it was Captain Hitsugaya's voice and I slid the door. The captain, working at his desk, looked up.

"You're up early," he noted in a very surprised tone. "And I'll thank you for not _completely _destroying my door."

I blushed but glanced at a nearby clock. It said eight. That wasn't early, was it?

"Nobody else gets up this early?"

He snorted. "No. The earliest I've ever gotten out of anyone here is ten o'clock."

I looked around. "Where's Rangiku-san?"

"You probably won't see her until after twelve o'clock. She's the laziest person around here." He paused for a few seconds before saying, "You know, you can come in."

I realized that I hadn't actually entered the room yet. Getting nervous, I recklessly rushed forward.

And promptly tripped and did a face plant.

_Damn! _I thought. My cheeks were stinging, my nose felt like it had been shoved into my head and my forehead was aching fiercely. I thought I had rid myself of this habit ages ago. Then again, it had taken me a huge amount of time and effort getting rid of it. I wasn't surprised that it had come back.

"Owwww…" I muttered, getting up and rubbing my forehead. I felt miserable that I had tripped in front of my captain, but when I saw his eyes they looked… almost comical.

"Are you alright?" he asked. Was it me, or did his mouth twitch upwards like he was trying to hold back a smile?

"Yes." Painstakingly I got up and dusted myself off. When I reached my full, short height, I at last grasped the sheer amount of paperwork that was in room. There must have been, what, at least 20 stacks of ten pound papers in here!! I realized that I tripped over a stack of papers in front of the door. And the captain had no one else to help him with it all.

"Um…" I started, unsure. He looked up.

"Do you… need any help?" I figured, that since my captain was so kind to me, I might as well help with this little task.

He looked at me with an incredulous look. "Are you kidding me?"

Gaining a sheepish expression I rubbed the back of my head, looking down. There wasn't really a way to express my thanks any other way…

"Fine then. Look here." He gestured toward a stack of papers close to me. "If you can, can you sort those for me? Those letters from that freaking fanclub keep getting mixed up with the important papers."

I stared at him, thunderstruck. "F-f-fanclub?"

He waved his hand nonchalantly. "Yeah. They're really beginning to get on my nerves, especially Matsumoto. Can't she tell that I'm in no mood for her matchmaker games…?"

I gaped at him. A fanclub????? Seriously???? Though I couldn't blame them, Captain Hitsugaya was an excellent captain anyway…

Becoming conscious that it was a very large stack, I placed Kurobararyu on the couch, sat on the floor and diligently got to work.

* * *

When Toushirou saw Aria get to work, he continued his own.

Several minutes passed, and slowly he began to forget that Aria was even in the room. It was only half an hour later that he remembered when he heard some rustling from behind the couch. He jumped, but calmed down when he recalled that his newest subordinate was with him. But he was surprised that he had actually forgotten she was there. It wasn't as though he couldn't feel her reiatsu, it was just that she was so quiet that it created the illusion that she wasn't there.

He peered around the couch, looking for the girl. She was sitting on the floor, glancing at papers and setting them into two piles. One pile was a colorful mess of envelopes that he had no doubt were from his accursed fanclub. The other pile was a neat mound of papers that were probably important ones that had to be looked over. He sighed at the quantity of paper he had to work on by himself but quickly returned his attention to had to admit, the purple ribbons were an improvement. She was being as silent as possible with the papers, careful to not rustle them loudly, and curled up. It was hard to believe that she looked even smaller than she already was, but that was the case. She looked like someone who wanted to blend into the background, not wanting to be noticed.

Like a ghost.

Why was it that he had a feeling that he only had a shadow of a former Aria, the mere leftover ashes of another girl, another life? He scrutinized her. Her hair was the exact same color as him, maybe even whiter, but she seemed so pale and small. The same noticeable grief was on her features, and she seemed extremely careful not to disturb her environment. She looked like she could fade away into oblivion at any moment.

He wasn't exactly surprised. With all the treatment she's been getting, it must've been necessary for her to find a way to not be noticed, no matter how hard it seemed. But the thing he noticed most about her was that she looked _tired. _She looked like she had experienced her entire life in a single day without a moment's rest. Tired of being treated the way she was, tired of keeping whatever she was hiding locked inside her heart…

"Captain?"

A muted voice interrupted Toushirou's musing. He looked up and was staring straight into a pair of large, emerald eyes. They seemed so clear yet deep; he felt as though he could lose himself in their endless depths.

She hoisted a stack of papers off the ground and asked, "Where do I put these?"

Toushirou pointed to a place close to his desk and she dropped it there, albeit with some difficulty because of its sheer size and weight. The captain tried to suppress some immature glee when he realized that there was someone shorter than him in his squad. She stood there, unsure of what else to do.

"Why don't you go get some tea?" he suggested.

Was it him, or did her face brighten, just a tiny bit? She nodded and without a word began to go out. Before she did, however, Toushirou had something to tell her.

"Miyamoto-san," he called. She turned, stopping halfway through the door.

"Meet me at the Squad 10 training grounds tonight around nine."

Her eyes widened, but she nodded a bit more enthusiastically and scampered out.

Toushirou leaned against the trunk of a fir in the cool night air. It was once again a cloudless spring night, warm and soft. Toushirou wasn't looking forward to the summer but he would bear it until the winter. He felt a familiar reiatsu coming closer and he got out of his position against the tree. Sure enough, there came little Aria, her long white hair flowing in the wind and quite seeable against the darkness.

She stopped a few feet away from her captain, clasping her hands behind her back, swinging back and forth and appearing to enjoy the air.

"Hi," she greeted without much expression.

The white haired boy would have liked to respond in a similar manner, but this wasn't the time for chit chat.

"Alright, I agreed to train you on how to control your reiatsu. As your teacher you must obey every command I give you, understood?"

Considering the fact that he was already her captain Toushirou wanted to smack himself in the head for being redundant like that. But it had to be said.

Aria nodded obediently and awaited further instructions. Toushirou walked over and pointed at three wide wooden stakes in the ground.

"Use your sword and cut those stakes."

Although it seemed to be a menial task, it was actually an important test. Toushirou needed to see how in control Aria's reiatsu was.

Aria reached for her sword with her left hand, grasping the sword handle that was parallel to her body. Toushirou noted to odd placement of her sword.

Drawing her sword, Aria faced the three stakes… and slashed.

Although he was expecting it, Toushirou was still taken by surprise by the sheer amount of reiatsu that was released. The moment Aria slashed she released many waves of reiatsu. They weren't that powerful, it's just that there were so many of them. The walls of the nearby buildings cracked and branches suddenly flown off. When everything calmed, the three stalks were completely cut in half, leaving a dismayed Aria. The captain walked over and touched her shoulder.

"Come over here and sit down," he ordered. Aria nodded in a slightly miserable way and sat onto the ground, wrapping her arms around her legs.

Toushirou was unsure of what to do next. When he was in the Academy he had no need on lessons on how to control reiatsu, since he was considered a prodigy and Aria's reiatsu seemed very different than his. Then he remembered that incident in the Academy. Her reiatsu was so intense that he could practically feel the anger and rejection in it himself. Gathering from what happened he immediately knew that emotions were heavily linked to the girl's spiritual energy. And thus he knew what to do.

"Listen closely," he began. "I want you to concentrate, Miyamoto-san. Let go of everything you know. Empty your mind so that you don't think of anything, or feel anything. Just… let go."

Aria looked up at him with those green eyes again. He noticed how piercing they seemed, as though she could see exactly what was going on in his head. She looked down again, perhaps pondering on what to do.

"Just let go," Toushirou repeated. It was the best way he could convey his instructions.

Aria took a deep breath and closed her eyes. The captain could tell how difficult it was for her to simply let go of her emotions. He watched her as she struggled to think of nothing, to let go of the sorrow deep in her heart. Her reiatsu rippled and flared; sometimes it would calm down but other times it would fire up again.

She sat there for minutes on end and Toushirou stood there, watching over her. And he had to admit, it was interesting to watch her. Her reiatsu seemed to never stay in one place; he was fascinated by how quickly it would shift from water to fire, from strong to brittle, but his face betrayed nothing.

An hour passed and still Aria could not quiet her energy. However the captain could tell that she wasn't ready to give up. All day long he had perceived that the sorrow printed on her face had never changed or left. However now, during training, he could see determination replace it. She had been sitting there for what seemed like ages. Others would have given up by now. And he learned something about her that night: she was the very persistent type.

The night air fell a few degrees and Toushirou realized how late it was getting.

"Miyamoto-san, it's time to go back."

With a sigh Aria opened her eyes and stopped concentrating. From the disappointed set of her mouth he surmised that she wasn't very happy with herself.

"Don't worry, these things take time," he assured her. "Trust me, I know a guy who leaks reiatsu like a broken dam. He's much worse than you."

Aria's mouth twitched, but didn't crack into a full-fledged smile. Toushirou was referring to Ichigo, whose leaking reiatsu rivaled that of Kenpachi's. But the thing he didn't tell her was that both of them were much more in control of their reiatsu than her.

"Let's go back. We've got more work to do in the days to come."

"Yes, sir."

* * *

My footsteps echoed their light tapping against the stone halls. Breaking in a jog, I looked around.

_Where is he? _

At last, I come across a light in the distance and found myself in a large dungeon-like room. The walls were made of stones and were dripping water.

"Hayashi-san?"

"Welcome again, Miyamoto."

I turned sharply and saw a dark silhouette in the shadows. He stepped into the light and I observed him carefully. He looked the same as ever, black wavy hair that reached his shoulders, a large constantly smirking mouth, and dark brown eyes that were almost black. Even though he had helped me in the past, I still couldn't shake the feeling that there was something sinister about Ikotsu Hayashi.

"I hope your new life as a Soul Reaper is suitable?"

"Oh yes, it's very nice."

"That's good to hear. Oh, and I like your hair ribbons. Now, if we could continue…?"

In the next few minutes Hayashi-san was instructing me on how to control my reiatsu.

"Let it flow out of you, Miyamoto. You can't keep it bottled up forever."

I frowned. That was not how Captain Hitsugaya taught me. But I believed in different teaching methods and did as he asked.

However, at the end of the training session, I did not feel any more control over my powers. Actually… they felt a little worse.

"It will come in time, Miyamoto. Now I bid you good night."

I bade him good night as well and ran out of the dripping tunnel.

But somehow… I couldn't rid myself of the ominous feeling that Ikotsu was not all that he claimed to be.

* * *

***Let it be known that I am part of Toushirou's Hitsugaya's self-proclaimed fanclub. The only difference is, I'm not desperate enough to send him gooey, mushy love letters. Then again...

I really enjoyed writing the part in third person because Shiro-chan is just so observant! And I enjoyed writing about Aria tripping. That was_ really_ fun to imagine. Teehehe...


	10. Encounters

*****HI HI!!! It's me again!**

**I didn't know how to incorporate this into it, but this story takes place about a year _after _the Winter War. Aria and her classmates never learned anything it because no one wanted another Aizen running around killing everyone and betraying everyone and the whole conquest deal. I think it's because they think it's annoying having to clean up after him. (Lol)**

* * *

Over the next few weeks, Toshiro learned a little bit more about his new subordinate.

Even though he only learned a small amount, he was grateful that he discovered anything at all. Aria didn't talk that much but her body language was possibly a lot more expressive than her speech ever could be.

First of all, he discovered that Aria was very good with her hands. Although they were small and a bit elegant, at the same time they were quick and efficient. Whenever the captain gave her paperwork to write on she would return the stack in a short amount of time, in neat handwriting. She seemed capable of fixing anything, even a cup that Rangiku broke that had shattered into so many pieces—many of the them tiny ones—that it seemed impossible to put it all back together again. Yet that's what she did, and the cup looked perfect. Toshiro could see where her skill in sword fighting originated.

But at the same time, she was incredibly clumsy.

Toushirou often wondered how in the world she got good shunpo grades whenever she tripped. If the girl was walking on a totally smooth, flat area then she would inevitably find something to trip over, probably her own feet. Not to mention they were always bad falls; she would always somehow get at least two big bruises each time she tripped. And sometimes she even took people with her; that was never a pretty sight. Toshiro wanted to chuckle every time he saw her fall, but he held it back, like always.

One day he decided to broach the topic with her.

"It's a wonder how you got good shunpo scores when you can barely stay on your own two feet," he joked lightly as he watched Aria painstakingly get up from tripping on the doorframe when her foot caught.

She grimaced slightly as she brushed herself off. "I took me a while to get those grades; don't ruin it."

Toushirou said nothing; he continued to stare at her, waiting for her to continue. Feeling his icy look Aria exhaled sharply and turned towards the captain.

"You see… every time I move to a new place… I have to adjust to it somehow," she explained, not looking at her captain as she fixed something on her robe. "My body takes time to adjust to new places, so it'll take some time before I'll stop falling over." She silenced herself after that.

Another thing to know about her: she never talked too much about herself.

Toshiro was slightly frustrated at this. She rarely ever said anything about herself personally. Hell, she barely talked at all. This was one of the few times that he actually got her to reveal something. He didn't even know her favorite color or something like that. It was as though she was keeping everyone out on purpose for some reason. He had consulted her file a few times, but her time in Rukongai was a bit skimpy and the entries were usually the same, always something about her destroying something with that extraordinary plant power of hers. What he really wanted to know was how she got to be so sad and introverted in the first place, but as usual Aria revealed nothing.

And then the graduation of the Soul Reaper Academy began.

The captain worried about having some of Aria's former classmates in his squad. He didn't want her to run into trouble and cause something to happen like on the day he met her. So far she showed no signs of concern as the day went by, but who could tell under those layers of sorrow? As he went over the new recruits, he began planning on how to take extra precautions on watching Aria and keeping her safe.

One day, a week after the graduation, while Aria and Toshiro were quietly laboring over paperwork, Rangiku in all her glory suddenly banged the door open.

"Morning, Captain! Mornin' Ri-chan!" she greeted enthusiastically. She was bemused at the scene before her. She was somehow reminded of two small children sitting at the same art table and doing their work, completely unaware of each other, which was a bit of the case.

"What is it now, Matsumoto?" her captain sighed.

"Captain, it's been weeks! Ri-chan rarely ever goes anywhere! I think I should show her around the Gotei 13 for the rest of the day!"

At the mention at her name Aria stopped writing for a moment and then continued.

Toshiro mulled it over for a few moments. On one hand, it would be a good idea for Aria to look around; she's in the office doing _Rangiku's _untouched paperwork too often. But then again it was that exact reason why he was a bit hesitant on letting her go. She's such a hard worker; she finishes the paperwork four times as fast as his lazy lieutenant. He decided to ask.

"Miyamoto-san, do you want to go?" he asked.

Aria jumped but began fingering her kimono.

"Well, uh, I guess…if it's okay with the captain…"

"Of course it's okay with him! Right, Captain?" Rangiku jumped in, looking expectantly at her superior.

Toushirou decided that Aria needed a break for all her hard work. Perhaps a little time away from all this paper would take away a little of that weariness away from her face.

"Go ahead," he consented with a wave of his hand. "You can deliver some stuff while you're at it. But when you get back, _you, _Matsumoto, will have to finish the paperwork that Miyamoto-san has been doing for you. I've been lenient so far, but if you don't do this, so help me, I swear I'll freeze your lazy bum to a chair until you finish it all!"

Aria looked at him with a thunderstruck expression. Rangiku was undisturbed.

"Ah, Captain, you're so mean! But alright, I'll do it. C'mon, Ri-chan, let's go have some fun!" Rangiku shouted happily, pulling Aria off her place on the floor.

Aria dusted herself off for a few seconds and looked back at her captain, taking a stack of papers he held out to her.

"I'll see you later then, Captain. And…thanks," she muttered quietly.

"C'mon, c'mon, let's go!" the strawberry blonde lieutenant whined, beginning to drag the small girl by her sleeve. Aria continued to look back at the captain with a mysteriously worried expression on her face.

Once the door was slid closed, Toshiro resumed his writing, pondering in his head the chances of getting Aria to replace Rangiku as his lieutenant.

* * *

"This'll be so fun, Ri-chan! We'll meet everyone, like Momo, Renji, Izuru…!" Rangiku-san chattered on as we trudged through the halls.

"Uh, Rangiku-san…"

"You'll get to meet all of my friends here! Not all Soul Reapers are total bums, you know. There are actually really, really nice ones!"

"Please… Rangiku-san…"

"And we might even get a chance to meet all the captains too! Isn't this great, Ri-chan? I bet no one has ever been on a full-fledged tour of the Gotei 13 in one day before! Especially the tour guide is _moi."_

_Oof, _I said in my head, hefting the large stack of papers that Captain Hitsugaya assigned me to deliver. _I wish she would help me carry some of these…_

_So why don't you ask her? _Kurobararyu asked.

_I'd like to see you try. I can hardly get a word in. _

_True. _

As she faded from my mind I began to think about other things while Rangiku-san babbled.

I was slightly worried about the captain. Would he be okay working on all those reports while I was gone?

_Always worrying about others, even the tiniest things, as always, _Kuro commented. _I'm sure he'll be okay. After all, if he managed to get all that work done with _her _as his lieutenant before you got here, then I'm certain that he can go a few hours without you doing her work. _

_Yeah, I guess you're right… Oof, this is heavy…_

It was times like this that I wish I was taller. I _really _didn't want to trip with all this paper in my arms.

Rangiku-san continued to happily chatter as we walked to who-knows-where. I knew the Squad 10 barracks pretty well but now I didn't even know if we were in it or not. I just hoped that the lieutenant's sense of direction was better than Lieutenant Kusajishi from Squad 11. (I picked that up from the captain.)

"Alright, here we are! Squad 13!" Rangiku revealed, spreading her arms wide. I craned my head around the skyscraper of papers in my face and saw a huge building with the characters for the number 13 painted on the wall. We only stopped there for a minute before Rangiku began dragging me against my will into the building.

We took a lot of turns, and I began to wonder if this place was built like the giant maze that the Seireitei is, until I realized that I was stepping on something soft. I looked down and I saw that my feet were on lush green grass.

_Welcome…_the plants around me whispered in my head.

Immediately I put down my stack of papers on the wooden floor behind me and looked around in amazement. Surrounding me was one of the prettiest gardens I've ever seen. The grass was a healthy green; there were variegated flowers everywhere along with healthy trees of all kinds. There was a cherry blossom tree, an apple tree…

_Welcome to our home, Aria… Please make yourself at home…_

"Thanks," I muttered quietly to myself.

"Do you like it?" Rangiku probed. I nodded enthusiastically.

"That's great! Let's go meet Captain Ukitake then!" I nodded again, having slight difficulty seeing where I was going, as usual.

There was a small house-like structure on the large garden that I didn't notice at first, but then I realized that Rangiku was leading me there. When we got close to it I heard the shouting.

"Kiyone! Gimme the kettle! _I _want to pour tea for the captain!"

"Too bad, Sentaro! I called it first! Besides, the captain likes it more when a proper lady pours the tea, right Captain?"

"As if you were a proper lady! You'd be better off being passed as a warthog!

"WHAT WAS THAT?!"

I wondered who in the right mind would argue over something as trivial as that while Rangiku shook her head.

"That Kiyone and Sentaro," she said under her breath. Seeing me looking at her she added, "The third seats of Squad 13. Their captain is always sick so the lieutenant usually does the work. And since they don't have one it's those two who are running everything and they're _always _fighting over their captain. You'll see."

And I soon did. When the lieutenant burst through the door there were three people in the room. A woman and a man were shouting loudly right in each other's faces while there was one who was oddly sitting in the back, looking like he had a really bad headache. I don't blame him.

"Ah, Lieutenant Matsumoto, good to see you," the man in the back said, sounding like he was gladly welcoming the distraction. Surprisingly he had long white hair and a sickly pale face. I guess white hair wasn't as uncommon as I thought.

"Hello, Captain Ukitake!" Rangiku greeted back, bowing. I would have too, if it weren't for this blasted stack of papers.

"Oh? Who's this?"

"This is our newest recruit, Aria Miyamoto!"

The lieutenant presented me with a flourish and I gave a shaky, "Hi," to them all. Kiyone and Sentaro stopped arguing to notice my hair.

"Ah, you have white hair like the captain!" Kiyone cooed.

"Except the captain's is a ton better! And since you said that, I'm the captain's favorite!"

"I knew that, Sentaro! I was just stating a fact! And the captain has much better taste than to choose you over me! Isn't that right, Captain Ukitake?"

The long white haired captain scratched his head with an exasperated look as the two started to bicker once more, completely ignoring everyone else in the room. I suddenly remembered that I had paperwork to pass out so I sifted through the stack and presented it to Captain Ukitake. He gave me a warm smile and thanks, which gave me a warm feeling inside.

"Lieutenant, is the girl a seated officer?"

"Oh yes! She's our third seat! Did you hear that, Ri-chan? Since you're our third seat you get to hang out with Sentaro and Kiyone more often!"

I didn't know which I was more thunderstruck by: the fact that I would be in the company of those two constantly arguing or that I was a third seat in Squad 10 AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW. Maybe it was both.

Rangiku either ignored my mild gaping or she just didn't notice.

"Well, we'll be going now, Captain Ukitake!" she said, turning around and waving her hand.

"Wait, Lieutenant! When you get back can you hand some candy to Captain Hitsugaya for me?" he asked, holding out a rather large bag of presumably candy.

"Sure!"

I cocked my head. "Does the captain like candy?"

The lieutenant giggled. "Something like that. Let's go to the other squads! Hurry!" Before I could pay a respectful good-bye to Captain Ukitake I was again jerked out of the building.

We went to Squad 12 next, and let me tell you, I have never seen a stranger sight. Captain Kurotsuchi was… well… if you stereotyped him then he would be the mad scientist type in my opinion. But I had to wonder, how in the world does a soul get a face like that??? There is absolutely no way he could have looked like that in the real world. I swear, he is the most bizarre person I have ever met. I liked his lieutenant Nemu though. Quiet, wanting to keep out of the way. She took her stack of paperwork from me with an almost muted, "Thank you."

"Don't just stand there, Nemu, you idiotic girl, go put those back in the division," Captain Kurotsuchi snapped. Nemu bowed and hurried off without much expression.

Now, I'm not much of a feminist, but even I could tell that this kind of treatment was just plain wrong. I fought to suppress the flame of rage that threatened to envelope me, with Kuro soothing me. My face twitched and I could feel my mouth curling into a sneer. My fingers were itching to grab my sword and press it to the monster's neck.

I had actually been keeping a secret from the captain and the lieutenant ever since Rangiku had given me those hair ribbons. I decided to experiment and used my kido to place a seal on the accessories so whenever I wore them they would suppress my leaking reiatsu from going hectic. But the flaw was that since it was heavily connected with my emotions they were also heavily suppressed as well. My rage disappeared, thankfully, but I was left with only emptiness, and I think it was showing, because I often saw Rangiku giving me concerned looks at the corner of my eye.

Squad 11 was one of my favorites. As we were passing a building in the barracks all of a sudden I heard a shout, and then a guy came flying out of a window! I yelped and jumped back, wondering if the poor thing was alive after being busted up with glass. The lieutenant waved her hand, said something about a man named Ikkaku, and we moved on.

The moment Rangiku opened the door to the office something pink and small flashed towards her. Not at all startled, the lieutenant dodged and the figure landed neatly on the floor. It turned out to be Lieutenant Kusajishi, the one with the bad sense of direction. I actually liked her, despite the hyperactive personality.

"Look, Ken-chan, it's another Snowy-chan! And she's even smaller!" she cried out in delight.

_Another one? _If I was just another one, the others must be Captain Hitsugaya and Captain Ukitake. I wanted to snicker at the silly nickname but I held my tongue.

"I think I'll call you Seppen-chan!"

Snowflake? Great, now I had two nicknames. Not that I minded, really.

Then I got a good look at her captain. And to be truthful, he absolutely terrified me. It wasn't his enormous reiatsu, it was that maniacal grin on his face.

"So, looks like you've got quite some reiatsu, little girl. I look forward to fighting you!" he challenged with an insane laugh.

Immediately I hid behind Rangiku, eyeing Captain Zaraki warily. The two lieutenants laughed, one rich laugh and one high pitched giggle.

After Rangiku-san assured me that the fight-driven captain was not going to flay me alive and gave Yachiru all the candy, I handed them their papers and tried to be discreet in ushering the lieutenant out the door, ignoring her chuckles. I learned to steel myself against upcoming oddballs.

As the stack steadily grew smaller, I was amazed at the differences between the squads. Squad 9's lieutenant (they strangely didn't have a captain; Rangiku didn't explain) seemed very responsible of his squad while Squad 8's captain seemed to be a sake-addicted womanizer and his lieutenant was a little cold but analytical. I thought the Gotei 13 had to be the same to work efficiently together, but it seems that's not the case.

Rangiku warned me about Squad 6. She said that at first the captain and lieutenant could be pretty intimidating but once you hang out with them some more they're not so bad.

"Can't be much worse than all the other weirdoes here," I muttered in response. She laughed.

Indeed she was right. Lieutenant Abarai had a pretty scary expression on his face, like he was trying to tell everyone that he was the tough guy. Although Captain Kuchiki didn't have the same face his coldness sort of chilled me.

"Hi, Renji!" Rangiku cried, sliding the door with a bang. I sighed. You'd think I'd get used to that but…

"Yo, Rangiku. Challenging me to another sake-drinking competition?" the spiky red-haired lieutenant replied.

"As much as I'd love to, I have to show my squad's newest recruit around! Speaking of which, Renji, I'd like you to meet Aria Miyamoto!"

Renji glanced at me and said, "Wow, Squad 10 really has a thing for midgets… Gah! I mean, uh, well…Please don't tell Captain Hitsugaya that I said that! He'll freeze me into next century!" Rangiku laughed at this and I turned away, looking out at the window at the sakura trees. All this time my ribbons had been suppressing my reiatsu along with my emotions. I didn't like feeling all hollow inside but it was the only way to keep everyone around me safe.

Then I realized I was being watched.

* * *

Byakuya had noticed the reiatsu even before it was within six feet of him.

How could he not? It was leaking like a broken pipe and seemed to resemble fire and water at the same time. It flickered, grew and curled. He could tell that it had enormous density despite its size but it felt restrained somehow, as though it was being sealed off by something. The noble wondered if his lieutenant could sense it. How could he not?

Renji looked up from his work. "Rangiku's coming… along with someone else…"

Byakuya snorted internally. So his thick-skulled lieutenant had some brains after all, he thought. However he was surprised that he hadn't noticed the Squad 10 lieutenant earlier; he had been entirely focused on the other presence.

Sure enough, the busty lieutenant burst through the door and began to have a chat with his subordinate. The captain suddenly noticed a tiny figure behind Rangiku, looking towards the window at the sakura. Byakuya was mildly surprised at her long white hair and tiny size, but most of all he noticed those luminescent green eyes. The surface of them resembled emeralds; hard and unyielding. But he could tell that that was only a mask to cover something up. He noticed that her face was slightly devoid of emotion and the strange thing was that it didn't look as though she was hiding anything; it looked as though she was actually not feeling anything, as though she was empty inside. She noticed his stare and jumps when she looks at him, bowing to hide her surprise.

"Hello, Captain Kuchiki," she says quietly. Byakuya feels her reiatsu spike, only to have it muffled again by that mysterious force.

Seeming to remember something Aria grabs some papers and hands them to the captain, glancing back out the window.

"It's a good time to watch the cherry blossoms," she muttered to no one in particular.

This comment piqued the captain's interest, albeit slightly. He watches her while the two lieutenants continue to chat. Aria sits down and watches the sakura trees as they flutter in the wind with those piercing green eyes of hers.

_With reiatsu like that, she can become very powerful, _Byakuya mused. But if she couldn't learn to control it, it could end up causing a lot of destruction.

"Ah! Ri-chan, why don't you go wait outside for a minute! I'll be right out! And leave the paperwork here; I'll carry the rest of it." Rangiku suggests. The girl nods silently and walks out the room.

It is silent except for the captain's brush until Renji says, "Rangiku, who is that girl? She has a monstrous reiatsu; where on earth did you find her?"

The woman sighs. "We were inspecting the Academy when we found her. She's actually a very nice girl, I don't know why everyone over there is afraid of her."

"Afraid?"

"Her zanpakuto can control plants to a powerful extent, but she can't control her reiatsu very well, so when she gets provoked she pretty much busts everything up. She's so lonely though, it's no wonder she gets aggravated so easily…"

"What are you going to do about her?"

"The captain's training her for now, but something's different. Her reiatsu's been suppressed, but it's not the training that's doing it. I'm a little worried about her, but Ri-chan will turn out alright."

Byakuya looked out the door where Aria was standing. He didn't notice before, but now that he thought about it she had a lonely, sorrowful look on her face. He returned to his work, but he continued to wonder if Aria could really control herself before she loses herself.

* * *

After a few minutes of standing by the door the lieutenant came hopping out with those papers in her hands.

"Whoops, it looks like the captain gave us some wrong papers to deliver! You stay here, Ri-chan, while I run this back to Squad 10 and get the right ones! Later!" She flash-steps away, leaving me all alone.

Even though I've been here for a few weeks I still don't like being left alone, especially in someone else's squad. What if someone I knew from the Academy finds me here? Graduation week really stressed me because I kept panicking about seeing someone familiar. Now I don't panic but I still don't' like it. I'm not sure if bringing my sword was a good idea or not. Trying to gather the meager confidence that I had I began walking away from the Squad 6 office, searching for a way to go outside. I had been walking for a few minutes now before I heard something behind me.

"Excuse me?"

I cringed, hoping that that person was not talking to me. But my hope was dashed as I felt someone tap my shoulder. Trying to keep a straight face I turned around. Behind me was an older boy who was about a head taller than me, with spiky blond hair, glinting blue eyes and a huge grin on his face.

"Hey," he said. "You lost?"

I shook my head. "I'm only looking for a place to go outside."

"Oh, that's easy. Just walk ahead some more and take the last door on the left. Squad 6 has a huge courtyard you know. Oh, and by the way, I'm Takumi Sawahata, fourth seat of Squad 10." He held out his large hand and grinned even wider, showing his teeth.

Huh, he's in the same squad I am. I reached out and gingerly took his hand and smiled tentatively. "Aria Miyamoto, third seat of Squad 10."

He mock-grimaced and said, "Geez, how'd a shortcake like you get one rank above me? One rank! The world has gone mad!" He turned and threw up his arms, joking about how unjust the world was. My smile grew and became more genuine.

"Anyway, I was running an errand for Captain Hitsugaya so I'd better get back. Hope I'll see you around more, Aria! Good luck with the fresh air; don't get eaten by it!" he joked as he waved good bye, strolling back to the squad. I smirked a bit and waved back, and then walked out based on his directions. True to his word Squad 6 had a wonderful courtyard, full of sakura trees. I wondered if the captain has an affinity for the pink blossoms as I sat down at the trunk of a tree, closing my eyes and leaning back.

I would have liked to stay there for a while, but unfortunately my peace was stolen. Out of nowhere these men come stumbling out, carrying sake bottles and making a huge ruckus. I opened my eyes and realized in shock that they were some of my former classmates at the Academy.

_Oh, bloody thorns! _I cursed in my head. I sprang up and looked for the nearest exit, and what do you know, those drunken fools are blocking it! I bit my lip, frantically looking for a place to hide. With those three all drunk who knows what they could do to me if they see me? I was about to jump behind a tree—

"Hey!" a slurred voice said. I cringed and tried to take cover again.

"You're that witch monster from the Academy!" another called. I grimaced; there was no more use in hiding now that they had seen me. I'll just have to somehow get around them…

"Yeah, who'd let a monster in there anyway? Someone should put her in a cage or something!" The man who spoke downed some alcohol.

A cage? No… I never did anything on purpose…

_Aria, don't you dare, _Kuro hissed. _Remember who you are! _

"Monsters should be captured and killed! They don't belong with normal people!"

My fists clenched. _I am normal! I am a human! I didn't ask for this! _My mind was screaming these things while Kuro tried desperately to calm me down. My hair ribbons worked and repressed my reiatsu, but not all of it. My anger was like molten lava: sluggish but red hot. I tried to remember how the captain showed me how to control my energy, but it was useless.

"How'd you even get to be a Soul Reaper anyway? No one wants to be around a monster! You'll kill them all and then we'll have to kill the fiend! Everyone's scared!" The men whooped at this and drank more. I fought the urge to attack; my fists were so tightly clenched that my palms were beginning to bleed. I wasn't sure if the ribbons would hold against this torrent of reiatsu that threatened to flood out of me. Kuro was shouting in my head, which helped a bit. But I'll never forget what one man said next.

"You've been abandoned by everyone! Even your own family tossed you aside!"

My fury peaked.

* * *

Toshiro flashed around all obstacles, making his way toward Squad 6. He had just realized that he gave Aria some wrong papers and was heading over. Normally he would have sent someone else but he wasn't sure how others would react to her.

He was nearing his destination when he felt it. A sudden increase in a very familiar reiatsu.

_I have to hurry! _He urged himself. He followed the burst of energy like a beacon. Then, he sensed another reiatsu.

"Captain?" Rangiku's voice called out. The captain stopped abruptly in front of his lieutenant, who was holding a bunch of papers.

"What are you doing here, Captain?"

"No time to explain, follow me!"

The lieutenant obeyed without question and flash stepped behind her captain.

As they were getting closer Rangiku sensed Aria's furious reiatsu. _I swear I'll skin the person who did it alive, _she thought menacingly. The two rounded a corner and the captain practically ripped off the door in his urgency. What they saw was slightly a shock.

Aria had drawn her sword and was pointing it at three men cowering against a tree. Taking from some discarded sake bottles they appeared to be drunk. The girl's arm was shaking as she glared at the men. They didn't look injured at all, just scared. Before Aria could cause any damage, Toshiro used shunpo and appeared next to her and place a hand on her shoulder.

"Miyamoto-san," he murmured.

* * *

It was amazing how quickly my reiatsu was snuffed, how most of my fury had iced over.

My arm was still shaking as I held my sword dangerously close to the drunken men but Captain Hitsugaya lowered it. Was it his own captain-level reiatsu that smothered mine or was it the chilling quality of it that had extinguished the flame of rage that had burst?

_Thank goodness, _Kuro and I thought at the same time.

It was a good thing I had those ribbons or else those men would probably be in much worse shape. I suddenly collapsed onto the ground, breathing heavily as what had happened registered. _So close… _

"Matsumoto, get these men to their squad leader and have them detained," the captain ordered. Rangiku nodded and gruffly shepherded the drunks, muttering something in a menacing tone to them. The captain's hand came back onto my shoulder.

"Are you alright?" he asked in a kind tone.

I was distracted by the coldness of his touch. It wasn't frigid cold, but it was cool, like the air around ice. It felt nice.

"Yes," I mumbled, getting up.

"Let's go back to the barracks. You can stop delivering things today."

I nodded, not wanting to talk, thinking back to what the man said.

"_You've been abandoned by everyone! Even your own family tossed you aside!"_

I shuddered. He didn't know how right he was…

* * *

*****Wow, I hope I didn't make any grammatical mistakes in this.**


	11. Flickering Embers

***AT LAST!!!! I'm finally done! It was kind of weird with this chapter: when I first started writing it I had a writing splurge (you know, the opposite of writer's block) but then I just kind of stopped for a bit. The beginning may be a bit drabbly but it was *snicker* important *giggle*. But still, after looking this over, I swear Aria is going to kill me.

Oh, and I have one more question. *Sigh* sorry guys for all these questions but they just don't explain any of this anywhere! Anyway, can anyone explain what a harem is? I _think _it has something to do with opposites, but like I said before they don't explain this anywhere. Thank you so much with putting up this.

One more thing: if any of you find any mistakes in any of my chapters, could you please PM me or something and tell me _specifically _what it is? I get kind of irritated when people tell me I made mistakes and they don't tell me what in the world they are.

* * *

I was so _tired. _

It had been about a week after I encountered those drunken men and since then I hadn't gotten any good sleep. I think it might be the nightmares that I have. Although they were merely flickers they horrified me all the same.

_You've been abandoned by everyone! Even your own family tossed you aside!_

I shivered as I worked on some paperwork. That comment had haunted me ever since it left the man's mouth.

Besides the slight insomnia everything was pretty much back to normal. Rangiku was out drinking and the captain was busy doing paperwork. Strangely enough he never seemed to yell at the lieutenant as much, but that's probably because I finish all of her paperwork and he doesn't have to snap at her for it.

I see Sawahata-kun every once in a while. I asked Captain Hitsugaya about him and he says that Jomei was a pretty good student and he was a well-liked Soul Reaper in the squad. I didn't know if he could release his sword yet, but I'll be sure to ask him sometime.

I rubbed my tired eyes when I had finished a sheet. They had violet shadows under them, obvious signs of my restlessness. I was fighting sleep every single moment, just to avoid seeing those horrendous images behind my eyelids. I'm surprised my handwriting didn't look sloppier. I'll have to visit Squad 4 if this kept up…

"Do you need a break?" my captain asked, sounding concerned. I had no doubt that everyone knew about my mild insomnia. One look of my face and you would have all the answers.

"No, I'm just going to stop for a moment," I replied, though I felt like flinging myself onto the couch and taking the longest nap in the world. I wondered if some tea would help.

"I'm going to make some tea," I announced softly. I stood up and swayed slightly, ignoring it along with my captain's protests, and marched out.

Walking was not easy. I was quite lightheaded and my drooping eyes were not helping. I felt like I wanted to punch something for no good reason, all because I was getting quite irritable. After just walking a few yards I was stumbling around like a drunk. Er, wait, scratch that, I do _not _want to stoop to that level…

I almost blindly groped in front of me, trying to find the mini-kitchen that had a small fridge, a stove and a number of other utensils. I turned left and smooshed my face into a wall.

"_Dammit_," I hissed. I couldn't help it, I was just so irate. I began banging my head on the wall, not caring if anyone saw me, muttering a stream of profanities that normally never left my mind.

_I swear the world is out to get me! _I screamed in my head. This definitely was not my normal behavior. I was surprised that Kuro had not retorted something back, but she probably knows that nothing would really help. My head kept colliding with the wall but I felt like doing much worse than that. I wanted to tear that wall apart with my fists; I wanted to smash it into little bits with Kuro… Oh, I _really _wanted to destroy it...! Thank goodness my ribbons were holding my reiatsu back, but it wasn't doing much with my emotions… Everyone better clear out soon if this keeps up…

"Whoa, look who's gotten all suicidal," a voice penetrated my thoughts.

It didn't matter that it was Sawahata-kun; I still death-glared him when I looked up. Normally I would have been quite fine with see him but I just was _not _in the mood.

Sawahata-kun stepped back when he saw my leer, but stayed anyway.

"You know, if you had a grudge against that wall, there are better ways," he said with a nervous smile.

"Oh, haha, like I don't know that already," I sneered. Where did this sardonic me come from?

He held up his hands, a sign of peace. "Just trying to lighten the mood is all. You look like hell, Aria."

"I never gave you permission to call me by my first name. Remember your rank," I snapped rudely. Wow, that was _really _unexpected. I was actually totally happy with him calling me by that, but, well… I'd make a note to apologize later.

He raised his eyebrows. "You're acting like hell too. Honestly, ever heard of sleeping pills? You know, even if you _did _manage to smash through that wall with just your head that's still not the right way to Squad 4."

"I wasn't going there, I was getting some tea. And you are _not _helping, Sawahata-kun. I'm having enough trouble finding a room only 20 yards away and I really hate every single thing and person in the whole world at the moment, so get out of my face."

Contrary to my expectations, he chuckled. "Wow, you must have had a lot of sleepless nights for you to turn out like this. If you want, I can get you to your tea _and _get you some pills." He appraised me, waiting for an answer.

Thankfully my irritability subsided and I nodded my head.

"Great," Sawahata-kun said. "Now, let's get you away from the wall…"

He steered me away and went down a few halls. When he stopped he put me against another wall, stabilizing me when I swayed a bit.

"Here. I've used these sometimes too, and let me tell you, they work wonders." He reached into his pocket and extracted something tubular. It was a standard small white bottle with a top you screw off. Taking it I shook it, wondering why it didn't make much noise.

"If you've been using it, why is it full?"

The fourth seat was unprepared for my question, as though he didn't have an answer at hand. But sure enough he said, "Oh well… I got a refill. Yeah, that's it…"

I unscrewed the top and inside were long, white ovular pills. I giggled.

"They're like mini-radishes!" I sniggered. "They're so cute!"

Oh no, please, not the loopy stage… My moods were swinging wildly out of control.

Sawahata-kun looked at me with a worried expression. "Eh, you alright there, Aria?"

I was practically incoherent, rocking back and forth and giggling like an idiot.

"Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown… Wait, if he was a king then why does _he _have to get the water? He has servants, doesn't he?" I giggled manically again and spouted off other silly lines I've heard and making strange comments about them.

I heard somewhere that you can actually get drunk off sleep deprivation. I had never believed it at the time, but now I sure do. Sawahata-kun shook my shoulders, trying to snap me out of my loopy state.

"Hey, Aria, c'mon, snap out of it. Don't go all wacko on me!"

His words somehow dissipated the loopy fog in my head (man, I hate mood swings) and I was coherent enough to pour some pills into my palm for swallowing. Seeing my hand Sawahata-kun grabbed the pills and shoved them back into the bottle. I looked at him questionably.

"Those knock you out pretty fast, so I wouldn't eat those now if I were you. You should swallow those right before you sleep; trust me, these get you asleep fast and keep you asleep." He handed me back the sealed bottle and pointed to his right.

"The kitchen is just that way. Try not to get lost, 'kay? I've got some things to do. See you later, Aria." He waved and walked off.

By now my loopy state had completely ebbed away and I stood there, my face flushed with chagrin when I thought about my embarrassing demeanor. Sighing, I turned in the direction that the fourth seat pointed and began walking, only to once again, hit my face into a wall.

_Oh, bloody thorns…_

After much difficulty I had _finally _managed to get some tea back to the office without spilling it all over myself. It had taken a lot longer than planned but I managed. But I still cursed the drunken men for getting me like this and wished that all of them would trip in front of a Cero. (Yup, still having mood swing issues.)

Putting all my focus in keeping the tray I held steady, I carefully pushed open the door and was not surprised to see my captain continuing his paperwork. He looked up and I was somehow touched that he still wore that concerned expression.

"What took you so long?"

I simply pointed to my face and set down the tray. He frowned but said nothing.

Steadily I tipped the kettle over two cups, trying not to rush. The steam that rose into my eyes did not help; it only made me sleepier. I longed to get some caffeine into my system.

"Here," I said as I handed the captain his cup. Wordlessly he took it, his hand faintly brushing against mine. Still cool. Somehow, I found that comforting.

He sipped it but then stopped, peering into the cup. I looked at him worriedly.

"Is it that bad?"

He shook his head. "No, it's not that… It's actually really good." He took a longer sip this time, making a satisfying gulp.

I felt flattered at this but said nothing. Returning to my work I drank my tea as well. I had taken extra time to make some good tea with a good amount of caffeine in it so maybe I could somehow combat my sleepiness. I felt very soothed as the somewhat sweet drink gushed down my throat and warmed me up. Feeling a little more rejuvenated I held the cup in one hand and began brushing my page. I hadn't noticed before but I realize now that I was kind of clammy before the tea. I took another sip in an effort to drive the wintriness away.

Silent minutes passed and I still kept the tea cup in my hand. I could tell that it really was beginning to work. My head seemed a lot clearer and my hand shook less, but somehow I still retained my tiredness. Still, better than nothing.

More time went by, and for some strange reason I had a sense of foreboding deep in my heart. What's going on? There was nothing bad that was happening, so why was I feeling so anxious? I tried in vain to extinguish the feeling, but it only got stronger. I poured more tea in an effort to rid myself of that feeling. I continued to brush ink across my paper and—

_ARIA!!!!!_

I was so startled that the hand around the cup shattered it all over the table, spraying tea everywhere. Alarmed, the captain stood up, but I couldn't pay attention, because Kuro was replaying some images in my head.

"OH CRAP!!!" I yelled, leaping over the table with surprising agility and busting the door open, not even bothering to pause when I heard my captain's calls. The door seemed a little broken, but I would worry about that later. I began running full speed to the hall where my room was, but somehow it just didn't seem fast enough. When did it seem so far away? I began to use shunpo and pushed my legs to the limit, flashing past other surprised Soul Reapers.

As I got nearer to my destination I felt a deep dread when I saw that smoke was hanging in the air. I was vaguely aware that Captain Hitsugaya was following me but most of my focus was on the smoke.

_ARIA! _Kuro shrieked in my head.

_I know, I know! I'm coming! _

I took a sharp turn and abruptly stopped, my mouth gaping at what I saw.

The hallway was filled with Soul Reapers, who were all focused on one thing: the angry flames emanating from the door of _my _room. Utter disbelief gripped me and I was too stunned to even move a finger until my sword gave another cry for help. Not hesitating for a moment I ran down the hallway, cursing myself for leaving Kurobararyu in my room. Cries of alarm and warning sounded around me as I got nearer and nearer to the flames. Soul Reapers close by were trying to douse the enormous embers to try to save the room. I couldn't care less about that; all I could think about was Kuro. I had a strong aversion of fire, which meant that she did too, and I couldn't erase the sheer terror that belonged to her in my mind.

"Miyamoto-san, wait…!" a familiar voice came from behind me. I didn't respond, even when his hand reached out and brushed the sleeve to my kimono, trying to pull me back. I couldn't stop even if I tried. Kuro and I were one and the same; when she burned, I burned. I raced down the hallway, getting closer to the flames than anyone else. I paused for a second though, when I was only a few feet away. For as long as I could remember I had a terrible fear of fire and I could never really get over it. The heat was a battering ram; it beat down upon my skin relentlessly. My arm shook, but I couldn't afford to be afraid now. For some reason I turned my head, searching for support. My green eyes locked with a pair of turquoise ones. The captain looked so alarmed, I wanted to laugh. It was just so out of character for him. Somehow looking into those cool depths froze some of the molten fear within me. Feeling that I summoned my persistence; it would take all the courage I had to pull this off. Captain Hitsugaya could see that from where he was standing.

"Miyamoto, don't you dare—!" he snarled, forgetting the normal honorific, but before he could finish I had already rushed into the scorching inferno.

The heat was choking and whipped against every inch of my skin. The smoke was making it hard to breathe so I began to crawl.

_Kuro, where are you? _I called. The room was completely in tatters; it would take weeks for it to be restored. The fire had already touched everything; all that was left was to consume it all. The bright orange color made it tough to see.

Unexpected fear gripped me again. What if I couldn't find her? I thought desperately. What if she burns and I do too?

_No, _I told myself, trying to sound firm. _You can get through this, Aria, you've been through worse. _I had actually, but that was so much different. I had never plunged into a physical fire before. I tried to conjure up an image of the captain's eyes, hoping to cool my mind. It worked a tiny bit, just enough for me to keep searching.

_Aria, _a trembling voice whimpered. My head swerved, searching for the source of the voice. I looked at all the likely sources: the desk, the bed… oh, where was she?"

_Kuro, gimme a sign here! I need your help!_

_Under your mattress, _she replied, her voice getting wispy.

Of course. These days I would always stash her under the mattress, despite her indignant protests, so that no one could easily find her and do something. I tried to rush over to where my bed was, but there was an especially large fire blazing on the bed; that's probably where the fire started. My unwanted fear unintentionally kicked in again, only this time it was sharper and stronger. My persistence fought against it and won out, just barely. I grit my teeth, my body still shaking, but all the same I rushed over and plunged my arm under the mattress, trying to dodge the surrounding inferno. I hissed in pain when my arm came in contact with hot material but still I groped.

At last I felt something hard under my hand and quickly extracted it. I breathed a sigh of relief when I saw that Kuro's sword form seemed untouched by the raging blaze. The only thing wrong was her palpable fear.

_Th-thank g-goodness, _she stuttered as I blindly tried to find my way out. I had to move out fast because the heat was just becoming too much. I wasn't crawling anymore, which was stupid, but I was in such a hurry to get away from the hungry fire. For the first time I didn't like the fact that my room was big.

At last I saw the door way and I ran for it, eagerness in every step.

_It's so hot, _Kuro whimpered.

_I know, I know, we'll get out soon, _I soothed, only a few feet away from the opening.

Suddenly the fire spat and wild flames blocked my path. I yelped and jumped back, trying to find another way to the door. There were none.

_I'll have to go right through them! _

I didn't like the idea. I _really _didn't like that idea. But the flames were so close to the doorway I had no choice. Taking a few breaths (and then choking) I steeled myself, closed my eyes and then ran with all my might.

For a moment I could feel the flames caressing my robes, searing them for a moment. But then I was past them, and finally close enough to the door! I was about to step out—

NO! Out of nowhere another fire exploded and somehow moved the half-charred door over the doorway!

"Oh for the love of—!" I screamed. This was just _NOT _my day! I was so enraged that even my reiatsu got past my ribbons and even managed to shove some of the fire away. The ribbons loosened slightly, but I'd tie them later. I tried pounded against the door with my fists, only to jump back wincing in pain because of its hotness. Kicking the door was not helping either; it only seemed to feed the flames.

It was at this point in time that I began to truly panic. And panicking while in a fire is something that no one should ever do. My breathing came fast, causing more and more and smoke to run into my lungs, which made me wheeze and then it got even _harder _to breathe. Which only made me inhale even faster.

As I stood there for a few moments surrounded by the hungry inferno, I really thought that I would actually die in here. How ironic, that I would die in the one place that I normally stayed away from.

_Sorry, _Kuro muttered in my head. Her voice sounded so…final.

Somehow that tone kindled some self preservation in me and I managed to keep on kicking the door, which made the fire go up faster but it did damage it. I didn't know where it came from, because it wasn't normally an emotion that I was conscious of, but something inside just told me to _not die. _

But it just wasn't fast enough. My oxygen was running out fast, and the clouds of smoke were making my eyes teary. I could feel my chest slowly constricting…

Then, out of nowhere, I saw that the door began to change. The flames slowly died away, and in replacement there was…_ice? _It crackled up the burnt wood and I sighed in relief as the heat in front of me died away. Before I knew it I was face to face with a huge iceberg.

But then something burst through the ice, creating a hole. I waited anxiously because the cold and hot air were not mixing well. They were creating a little wind, blowing the flames my way. I panicked again, even stabbing away the ice myself with Kuro.

Then something shot through the hole; it was too fast for me to see what. Something grabbed my uniform and began tugging me rather roughly. I was too surprised to do anything, so I shot at the hole, but it was still a bit small and I didn't easily get through. I heard some vehement cursing on the other side and then I was jerked even harder, this time breaking through the ice. I winced as some ice shards cut me, but soon I could feel some non-hot air around me. I realized that my eyes were closed and I opened them wide. I couldn't believe it; I was outside, away from the frightening fire! I looked back and saw the huge iceberg that was previously my door. I could have jumped for joy, but… I was suddenly aware that a _very _stern captain was glaring at me.

"What the hell do you think you were doing?" he hissed. His hand was still gripping my sleeve very tightly. I was surprised that I didn't feel any fear staring into the icy fire that was his glare. _Almost_ no fear.

I shrugged, and firmly grasped my sword. "I had to get Kurobararyu" was my simple answer.

His eyes flashed and he replied hotly, "Someone else would have gotten it. You didn't have to burn yourself alive."

"That someone else would have 'burned alive' too. She is my responsibility and mine alone."

I stared coolly up into the angry face of my captain. It was almost comical at how short I was; this was the first time I consciously acknowledged that he was about a forehead taller than me. But soon the coolness began to wear off, and I began to feel something else. I stared back at the charred remains of my room and a thought finally formed to the emotion I felt.

_Someone set this. _

I had no doubt. How was in possible that a fire had been set _particularly _in my room? I just realized that the fire did not ravage any part of the barracks; everything was centered on my room. And a drunk could not have simply stumbled in and knocked a candle over. There were three things wrong with that: first, I kept no candles in my room; two, no one uses candles in the morning; lastly I always took extra, _extra _care to lock my door every time I left, even during my insomniac days. I perfectly remember locking it this morning. And something else just occurred to me: while I was searching for Kuro in the inferno I smelled the faint scent of oil and on my bed, the hottest area, I saw a huge black blot, as though it had burned more severely than the rest of the room. I hadn't registered it at the time, but with the heightened adrenaline from the fire, I remember with perfect clarity.

As these thoughts ordered themselves, despair and anguish seized me. This was a much more open statement expressing how I was a monster. In history, people would almost always raze what they deemed as demons to ashes. What more could be taken from this? The message that was all-too-plain to see: the monster must die.

I hadn't realized that there were tears in my eyes until I heard myself choking. Hastily I wiped them away, but the gesture was not unnoticed by Captain Hitsugaya.

"Are you alright?" he asked in a worried tone. "We should probably get you to Squad 4 to get those burns checked…"

He thought I was crying because of the burns. Now, with the anguish setting in, the blisters were nothing. I was good at suppressing tears; I had done it countless times before. Vigorously I shook his arm off and began running, no, fleeing. Again he came after me, but this time I was not touched; instead I ran faster, and surprisingly I didn't trip and I did actually lose him.

_Why is it that you're always by yourself? Why do you suffer alone? _Kuro murmured sleepily in my head. It had been a long day for her; I could at least find some solace in _someone _escaping reality for a bit. But her questions only left my own, like flickering embers.

_Why am I alone? _

* * *

Me:.....Please don't kill me.

Aria: *Sighs* I don't have the energy for that right now. I just had the worst day ever thank you very much. I need a nap.....

Me: Sorry........ Wait, did you say _right now_? To all my readers, if I...... _disappear, _please contact the Soul Society and have that investigated. Oh wait, if I disappear, that means Aria does too! AHA! IN YOUR FACE, ARIA!!!!!

Aria: Dang.....

Me: And one more random question to you wonderful people who go through the trouble of reading my Author Notes (spoilers for those who aren't up to date on Bleach right now): does anyone know what happened to Grimmjow in the current Bleach storyline? I'm not quite sure what happened to him. Is he dead or what? Yeah, random thing.


	12. Plunge

***Hey everyone! It's me, Dusty! Or, whatever you wanna call me if you don't want to use my full username. Sorry this took so long, I was writing two chapters at one time so I could post them at the same time. Not to mention I've been _super _busy because I've been working on this thing for this contest....AND I GOT 4TH PLACE!!!! WOOOOO!!!! I seriously did not expect that. I don't get to go to the national competition, but I didn't really want to go anyway. I CAN'T BELIEVE I GOT AHEAD OF ALL MY FRIENDS!!! Seriously, if you'd seen their projects, you'd probably be thinking that they'd be ahead. But no, my partner and I did! Yay!

Anyway, I just had to tell that to someone. Anyhoo, this chapter is shorter than my other ones because it's what I call a transition chapter. It was originally supposed to go on the previous one but I thought it would make it too long so I cut it out. Just some reminders: the blue lines mean that the POV change (every time except for my AN's) and Aria doesn't like cursing that much so in replacement she sometimes says "thorns" or "bloody thorns" or something like that. But she still does swear whenever she gets really TOed, so yeah. Ok, I'll shut up now to give you some reading peace.

* * *

Anywhere. Any place would have been fine.

I clumsily ran away from the fire that was my bane, stumbling a few times as I did it. It was familiar to me though, in a sick way. How many times had I run away from the things that continuously caused me misery? Too many to count. There was hardly a soul about, probably helping with the fire. I didn't know where I was going and frankly I didn't care. The white walls somehow ceased to show any difference between them and I continued to pass them, again and again…

At last, I had to stop to catch my breath. I hadn't realized how hard and how long I had run. I keeled over, taking deep breaths and pushing my hand against the wall to support myself.

_Well, since I stopped, I might as well stay here_, I thought. I looked around, and realized in horror that it was the Squad 10 office that I was outside of. I cursed myself mentally but I was just too tired to move on. Besides, I would have come back here eventually; no need to prolong the inevitable.

It was empty, just as I expected. I bit my lip when I looked at the mess I had made when I had carelessly rushed out the door. Grabbing a damp rag I began to pick up the pieces of the tea cup I had shattered and wiped up all the tea that I spilled.

Once every tea drop was wiped, every shard picked and every piece of paper in order I simply plopped onto the couch and sat there limply, not moving an inch. I could see that the fire not only ate away my room, but the last of my energy as well. My encounter with it had exhausted my mental stability as well as my physical. I _had _to get some sleep.

Then I remembered the pills that Sawahata-kun had given me a bit before the fire. I reached into my pocket and extracted the white bottle that contained the sleeping pills. Pouring the last of the tea into an unbroken cup I unscrewed the cap and poured some of the tablets onto my hand. It was then that I thought of something.

"Oh, thorns… I forgot to ask for the dosage…" I muttered. "I guess I'll just take one this time then…"

I spilled the capsules into bottle except for one. Screwing the top back on, I scrutinized the white oval.

"Hmph… This thing looks nothing like a white radish…" (**A/N: WAHAHAHA!**)

_Anyway, _I put the pill onto my tongue and took a swig of tea, swallowing it all.

Minutes passed, and I began to feel the effects of the medicine. _Sawahata-kun was right, _I thought drowsily. _These do work fast… _

My eyelids drooped and I was vaguely aware of my body slipping out of its position and lying on its side. My mind clouded, and my thoughts became less and less coherent. _At last… _

A little nap wouldn't hurt. I'll just rest for a few moments…

* * *

The tenth captain cursed.

Not out loud of course, because he was surrounded by subordinates. But if someone could read his mind, that person would be cringing visibly and covering his or her ears.

Toushirou had pasted on what seemed like a permanent grimace on his face as he directed people on extinguishing the fire. Rangiku had also turned up from who-knows-where, but he was too preoccupied with his own thoughts to scold her.

The image of Aria's tortured expression seemed to be burned into his mind. The only other time he had seen that look was when they first met, at the end of the sparring match. That day he had promised himself that he never wanted to see that face again. Unfortunately, it was broken.

At first he thought she was crying because of the burns she had endured when she had foolishly rushed into the blaze. But as her expression went from bad to worse, he knew that that was just impossible. And then it hit him.

How many times has he seen someone who was different get treated differently? Many, many times. In Aria's case, it wasn't the good kind of treatment. After she had run away (he was surprised she could do it so well without tripping) an ancient memory, as though something from a past life, was tugged into his mind. It was a vague memory, but the basics were there. There were a group of people with fire and an assorted array of weapons chasing something. And another: one of a giant pyre with a giant stake with what appeared to be a person tied to it. The crowd surrounding it appeared to be jeering. The bottom line: monsters, often people who just seemed different, had to burn.

At first he didn't believe that the fire was set. He stubbornly thought that this could have been a simple accident, no harm done. But that was before the evidence began to pile up.

When he entered the ashen room, there were other Soul Reapers everywhere, trying to extinguish any lingering flames. He surveyed the damage critically and sighed. Where was Aria supposed to sleep now? If he ever found the person responsible….

"Captain Hitsugaya!" a voice called. The white-haired boy turned and saw an unseated officer rush over to him.

"What is it?"

"I found this in the remains, sir…"

She held up something in her hand and Toushirou's insides froze.

In her hand were the charred remains of a match. Although much of it had turned to ash, the captain could barely make out some of the wooden handle and the tip in the Soul Reaper's hand. He stared at it angrily, his emotions at a boiling point.

"Someone set this fire, sir. We've also found traces of oil all over. Someone wanted to deliberately burn this room."

Toushirou had heard enough. He barked an order a little harsher than necessary for the cleanup and angrily marched away with his lieutenant at his heels.

"Where's Ri-chan going to sleep, Captain?" she asked.

"We'll just put her in another room, that's all there is to it," he snapped back, not thinking the answer through.

Rangiku was silent as they walked briskly back to the office, which made the captain quite happy. Unfortunately he was still quite furious so the good feeling didn't last.

"You know, Captain, we don't have any spare rooms right now," the lieutenant announced quietly. Toushirou stopped abruptly and turned towards her.

"Are you joking?" he asked in a low voice. With unusual seriousness she shook her head.

"We're constructing some more barracks, but they're not finished yet."

Toushirou ran a hand through his hair. He could feel a huge headache coming on. "Then where the hell is she going to sleep?"

"Well…" Rangiku's voice trailed off. For a few seconds she thought. And then, her expression changed. And not in a good way, to Toushirou at least. Her eyes lit up, and a devilish grin crept onto her face. The look was familiar but he just couldn't place it…

"Well Captain… She could always bunk with you," she giggled.

Silence.

Rangiku watched in glee as she watched her captain's face morph from boiling anger to a mixture of horror and embarrassment. The grin on her face grew even wider. Rangiku had always teased her captain about his lack of romance and was constantly playing matchmaker. She decided to tease him some more as his face began to turn into a _very _vivid shade of red.

"Oh, Captain's having dirty thoughts about Ri-chan! Perv in the house!" she cried in mock alarm. Toushirou's face grew even redder as his eye twitched.

"Matsumoto, shut the hell up!" he yelled. His lieutenant was having a good time.

"C'mon, Captain, I know you want to!"

"Matsumoto, I _swear…_!"

"That's probably why you're keeping her all to yourself, isn't it? So you can make a move! I never knew you were so sneaky!"

"MATSUMOTO, SHUT YOUR TRAP FOR ONCE!"

The lieutenant continued to giggle uncontrollably, but stopped her chattering nonetheless. Deep inside she knew her captain wasn't that kind of person but she was just trying to get him to loosen up and have some fun. The captain, still a brilliant red, continued to run his hand through his hair.

"Go back to the ruins and direct the cleanup," he ordered in a low voice. "I'll just go back…"

His lieutenant eventually sobered up and nodded, flash stepping away.

_Finally, some quiet, _Toushirou thought as he himself began walking briskly back to the office, trying to rid the hotness of his face. But as his head cleared up, he realized that Rangiku was right. Aria would just have to sleep in his room until her room was properly rebuilt. But seeing how much damage it had taken she would be there for a few weeks…

The captain shook his head vigorously. There was absolutely _no _reason why he should be embarrassed! It's not like he and the third seat were going to do anything! The thought had never even crossed his mind. Damn that Rangiku for bringing it up…

Arriving at the office the captain swung the door open with a clatter. The couch was facing him, and his eyes immediately softened when he assessed the sleeping figure lying there. Aria slept bundled together, her legs held against her chest. She looked incredibly helpless in her sleep. However, even in slumber the sadness on her face did not seem to change. She seemed very deeply asleep.

_It's no wonder, she's had barely any sleep in the last week, _Toushirou thought considerately. He looked around, searching for a blanket or something to cover her up. Seeing none, he did not hesitate to shrug off his haori and throw it over her. She did not stir. He hoped that it wasn't too cold from his own body.

Quietly he strode over to the desk and began to get back to work, filling in some forms about construction for a new room. He tried to make his brush strokes as silent as possible to not disturb his third seat, but he doubted she would wake even if the entire Squad 11 was in the room. Still, he continued to inaudibly work.

Minutes passed, with only the occasionally muffled clatter from elsewhere. The captain was looking out the window when he heard something strange.

"Please," a small voice whimpered from behind the couch. "Please…don't leave me…"

* * *

***HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sorry...*wipes away a tear* I just couldn't help myself..... BUT! Just to tell you something, **THIS IS NOT A LEMON. **And I never planned for it to be. I don't even think there's even going to be anything suggestive in here..... Except for Rangiku's teasing. That's pretty much it. At least I hope so.

I'm going to be changing the title to this pretty soon, so if you guys get alerts about a story with a title that has the word "seed" or something that has something to do with plants, click it. It's probably my story, only with a different title. The first one was just a prototype. I'm not too good at coming up with titles so I just let that one sit until I could think of one I liked.

**PLEASE REVIEW. **Compliments and constructive critisism is welcome. If you find any mistakes in here feel free to say so in the review and BE SPECIFIC. Anyway, onto the next chappie!


	13. Broken Memories

***Another reason these two chapters took so long: this particular one was a bit tough for me to write, hope you figure out why once you read it. Anyway, some things in this won't make too much sense, but I have a good reason why. Don't begrudge me if it's kind of off, it's my first time trying this....

_

* * *

_

It was dark…

_Everything felt heavy… My body felt incredibly weighted upon, but it was not numb. _

_Where was I? _

_Wasn't I supposed to be asleep? If that was the case, why were my thoughts this clear? This was not the lucidity that occurred during slumber… It was hard to tell…_

_Something flickered. _

_Blurs. Ripples. _

_All of a sudden it was no longer dark. The scene before me changed, and yet at the same time it didn't. Again, I was confused at my whereabouts. _

_It was as though I was very, very close to a giant screen. Like I was a ghost; there, but not really there. I wondered for the umpteenth time what was going on._

_An odd setting appeared before me. It appeared to be a large, slightly run-down building surrounded by other run-down structures. I saw a beautiful, lush garden in right next to it._

_My brain slowly processed this, and I felt horror slowly dawn on me, like flowing mud. My old home in Rukongai…_

_This was impossible… I had intentionally buried all memories of this place into the back of my mind, hoping to forget the events that took place here…_

_But even I should have known that no matter how much you forget something, that doesn't change the fact that it never happened. _

_I watched, utterly paralyzed, as a door right by the green garden slid open and a little girl came dashing out. She was tiny, wearing a worn kimono, and had short white hair that only reached her shoulders. Her bangs did not hang in her eyes; on the contrary, they drooped comfortably in the middle, barely above her eyebrows. She had emerald green eyes. _

"_Onee-chan! Come out and play with me!" the little girl cried. She seemed giddy, jumping and fidgeting where she was standing. An impatient look was set on her face. At last, she saw something near the door and became even giddier._

"_Alright, Ri-chan! Keep your pants on!" another voice emanated from the building. Another girl stepped outside. She was a third taller than the other. They looked remarkably alike, with some minor facial differences, the exception that the older one had jet-black hair that draped past her shoulders. Their eyes were the same shade of emerald; only the black haired girl had a bright look, while the one with white had a sharp, all-knowing expression._

"_Hurry up, Onee-chan! You promised that you would play with me today!" the short one announced rather loudly. _

"_I'm sorry, Ri-chan, I've been busy," the tall one replied sheepishly, rubbing the back of her head. The other one began to tug on her arm._

"_C'mon, c'mon! Come look at my garden!" she said urgently, tugging and gesturing. The black-haired one swept her eyes over the magnificent backyard, and her eyes widened._

"_Wow, you must've had a lot of free time! It's beautiful!"_

"_Look, look, look!" _

_The young one had rushed over to one of the trees and picked something off, and then rushing back over to her sister. Offering it to her, I saw that it was a pear._

"_Eat, eat, eat!" she compelled, practically pushing it into the tall one's mouth. She backed away a bit but took the gift all the same, eyeing it and greedily sinking her teeth into its flesh. Her lively eyes widened even further._

"_Really, really good…" she moaned, and took another bite. The short one beamed. _

"_We can pick these and sell them some time! I'm sure lots of people will like them!" she exclaimed cheerily. The one in black nodded, still munching._

"_Geez, Ri-chan, how do you garden so well?"_

_The short girl shrugged. "I guess I just have a green thumb." _

_Through all this, I had watched silently, sorrow slowly filling me. The girl with the short white hair had no idea of the things she had in store…_

"_Come on! We'll be late!" another unknown voice called. The girl in black turned her head sharply, not noticing the slight frown on her little sister's face. _

"_I'm sorry, Ri-chan, but I have to go," she said gently, patting the other one's head. The latter grimaced._

"_But we just started!" she whined. The taller girl looked apologetic._

"_I promise we'll play longer next time," she pledged. With that, she ran back with a, "I'm coming!" _

_The younger girl stared after her retreating figure, until she could not see her any longer. She did not look happy._

"_That's what you said last time, Onee-chan," she whispered. _

_I wanted to close my eyes. I wanted to flee. I wanted to stop watching this, before something would break. Before _I _would break. _

_Suddenly, the scene seemed to blur again, and it morphed into another one. There was a small room before me, with some tatami mats and rugs scattered about with a table in the center. A man with short, black hair was sitting on one, reading a book._

_Suddenly a door burst open, and the same girl with white hair came running in. She looked generally the same, save for being a tiny bit taller and longer hair. She ran and stood in front of the man. He peered up. _

"_Auntie! Uncle! Look! I got accepted!" the girl declared with a hint of pride. She waved a paper in front of the man's face until he examined it._

"_Well done, Ri-chan," he complimented with a warm smile. The girl beamed and took the paper back. _

"_Yes, congratulations," someone else said. A woman in what appeared to be in her mid-thirties appeared from another doorway. She was a little round with sandy hair tied in a bun. _

"_You'll be just like your sister. You can become a Soul Reaper like her!" she said with a smile._

_Did I imagine it, or did the girl's smile falter a bit?_

"_Yes, you'll be just like her. Let's hope you can measure up," the man continued, still with that clueless smile pasted on his face. How could he not notice how his words were like blows to the child?_

"_Uh, yeah… like Onee-chan…" the girl muttered, head down. "I'm going to my room now, excuse me." With a bow she walked off. It looked almost like she was fleeing._

_She opened the door a little roughly and closed it with a loud crack. Rushing across the room, past one futon, she jumped into the one closest to the window. _

"_Why?" she mumbled. "Why is it that you only saw Onee-chan in me? I wanted you to see _me _going to the Academy, not her…" She buried her face into the pillow. The paper she was so enthusiastically brandishing lay crumpled and forgotten on the dusty floor. _

_My vision warped again, flashing images that sometimes made sense and sometimes didn't. There were pictures of a solitary figure standing in a garden, one where she watches her family leave the door without her, and many more. The similarity between them: she was always alone. _

_It was as though someone had pinned my eyes opened, forcing me to watch the awful truth. To me, it was the exact same thing as torture. _

_Everything stabilized once more, and I was slightly surprised at what I saw. The girl in white was in the garden along with the girl in black, but the latter was wearing a black uniform and was wielding a sword. _

_I noticed the white haired girl narrow her eyes. "Just because you have a fancy weapon doesn't make you better," she said, her tone a tiny bit harsh. Her sister did not seem to notice. _

"_Oh yeah? Well, if you haven't opened your eyes already, Ri-chan, I'm the one who's a Soul Reaper, the one who's in the Gotei 13, the one with the zanpakutou. In a way, it does make me better."_

_She had meant it in a playful way, but her younger sister did not seem to see it like that. _

"_You're such a show off! No one wants you to be queen of the universe, you know!" she snapped, her voice reverberating strangely out in the open. _

_Her sister's eyes tightened and her bright eyes became sharp. _

"_I was only kidding! Geez, what's up with you these days?" _

"_What do you mean, 'what's up with you these days?'?! You're never around to notice anything!" _

_The short girl's temper was swinging wildly out of control after only a few words. Her green eyes stared accusingly at her older sister with her teeth bared. The girl in black frowned and sheathed her sword, putting it onto the ground. _

"_You know why I'm never around, Ri-chan! I'm busy with Soul Reaper—"_

"_Don't say that to me! It's always Soul Reaper this, and Soul Reaper that! Oh, look at me, I get to run around waving my fancy sword around and smash Hollows in the face! I get to prance around the world of the living and do konsos on wholes! That's all you talk about! It's just about you, you, and you, isn't? Whatever happened to your promises, Onee-chan? Whatever happened to me? I bet I'm just a burden to you now, huh? I'm just some pretty little decoration in your life, something you could toss away at any time!" _

_She was practically shouting at this time. The raven-haired girl's face grew angry, but strangely, I saw that it faltered with something. I had never noticed that before. _

"_What is _wrong _with you?! You know it's not like that! I'm just doing what's best for Soul Society! You're being such a brat, Ri-chan!" _

_That snapped something within the other girl, and she leapt at the accuser with beastly ferocity, tackling her to the ground. The victim hissed and began to throw punches, with some contact, but it only provoked the other even more. The one in white tresses scratched and kicked ferociously with the other screaming and punching._

_A dog fight swiftly ensued. It was the perfect description of the event. The two were scuffling in the dirt like dogs fighting over a piece of meat, for that slight chance at survival. The smaller girl was holding up surprisingly well against her sister; she did not succumb to the other's blows despite her size and landed many hits as well. I continued to watch them claw and beat upon each other, trying to will them to stop. Obviously, it was to no avail. _

_The fight continued for several minutes, though I had no idea how I could tell because time seemed to have stopped in this strange place. And then the door that led back into the run down building suddenly burst open, and a woman came running out._

"_What in the world are you two doing?!" she shrieked, grabbing the scruff of both girls and pulling them apart with surprising strength. The two children ignored her and tried to tackle each other despite being in their aunt's firm grasp._

"_Enough! Both of you!" she chastised loudly. "I've seen you two fight before but never this bad! Can't you see that nothing will come out of scuffling around?" She shook them for effect._

_The two attempted to attack one another once more, but the woman's shaking quickly dissipated any desire for fighting. Once they stopped struggling she dropped them and watched with a critical eye as they got up and dusted themselves off._

"_Honestly, I would have thought that you two would have been rid of this habit a long time ago! What with Ri-chan about to attend the Academy and her sister already a Soul Reaper! Will you two ever grow up?" _

_The two children rubbed their faces in an effort to clean themselves and refused to look at each other as they received a good chastising. _

_Once their scolding was over, the one in black did not hesitate to proceed to a gate built in the fence surrounding the garden. _

"_I should get back. They'll be wondering why I've been gone so long and I have _important _work to do. Apparently, I'm not wanted here," she growled coldly._

"_Go ahead; go! It's not like you _wanted _to be here," the one in white lashed out in response. Simmering they flipped their heads at each other petulantly and marched angrily in opposite directions. _

"_Watch out, Onee-chan!" the shorter one cried out. The one in black paused but continued. "You better watch out, because someday, I'll be a better Soul Reaper than you! I'll surpass you and be better in every way!" _

_Those words continued to ring out despite the shifting images before me. _

_Why were these images so vivid, so clear? Dreams were not supposed to be this way. And it was clear that I was having a nightmare, so why wasn't I waking up? _

_And then, something came to me._

"_Those knock you out pretty fast, so I wouldn't eat those now if I were you. You should swallow those right before you sleep; trust me, these get you asleep fast and keep you asleep." _

_I see… Those capsules I ate are the things keeping me asleep… But that doesn't explain why this dream was so clear…_

_The omniscient screen before me settled, and there was still no way to run…_

_The girl was crouching alone, as usual, in the garden, obviously gardening something. I could tell that there was a cold, angry expression on her face, but she made no effort to express it._

_The door opened for what seemed like the umpteenth time, and out came the woman from before. _

"_Hi there, Ri-chan. Can I join you?" she asked pleasantly. The girl made a sound of approval and went back to her work. _

_The woman knelt down alongside the girl and began working too, saying nothing. The smaller one didn't make an attempt to acknowledge her presence either. _

"_These are beautiful, Ri-chan," the woman complimented in an attempt at small talk. "You have such a talent with plants; with you they even grow here in the 60__th__ district!" _

_The girl shrugged, but I could tell she was beginning to get less angry due to the attention she was receiving. _

_The woman seemed oblivious to the aura of antagonism that the girl was emitting. She began chatting about random topics, which eased the girl little by little, but on the topic of her sister, she stiffened visibly. But the woman still did not stop her babbling. _

_She continued this topic longer than the others, expressing how proud she was. I couldn't hear her exact words, strangely, but I knew what she was talking about. _

_The girl in white bristled and gritted her teeth, her green eyes flashing. She even scooted away a few centimeters, but somehow she just didn't have the heart to say anything to her guardian. _

_Time passed in that strange dream sense, and at last the woman ceased her babbling. She got up and dusted herself off, under the watchful stare of the young girl. _

"_Well, I'd better be off. Your uncle and I have to go meet your sister for a celebration. Can you watch the house while we're gone?" she asked. _

_The girl's eyes grew outraged and she stood up abruptly. The woman looked at her curiously._

"_Is something the matter?"_

"_Of course!" the girl exploded, throwing her arms up. Her guardian appeared surprised at her loud outburst. _

"_Of course there's something wrong! Why is it that it's also Onee-chan these days? You're always with her, always doting over her! Onee-chan this, Onee-chan that, I'm sick of it! Why do you always pay attention to her! I'm here too you know! I'm here! I exist!" Her voice may have been angry, but I could detect a hint of desperation in it. _

_The woman's eyes narrowed. "What is wrong with you, Ri-chan? Why can't you be happy for your sister? She's a proper Soul Reaper in the Gotei 13!"_

"_See! This is what I'm talking about! You never say anything nice about me anymore! In fact, you never seem to even talk to me anymore! And when you do, it's always about Onee-chan!"_

"_Ri-chan! You are being immature! You're just jealous of your sister, but most of all, you are being selfish!" _

_The last word triggered something. From where I was I could see the girl emitting red energy from her body, which was shaking. The woman had already turned her back and was stomping back into the house, so she didn't notice the anger pulsating from the girl._

"_I'M SELFISH? I AM? WHAT ABOUT YOU? YOU NEVER CARE ABOUT ANYONE BUT WHO MAKES YOU LOOK GOOD! I'M NOTHING BUT A GHOST TO YOU!" the girl roared. _

_Everything changed then._

_A blinding explosion occurred, mixed with a horrifying scream, completely voiding my mind of everything. There was no thought, no images, nothing…_

_And then everything settled. _

_The girl was panting heavily, but she and I were completely shocked at the sight before us. _

_Thick roots enveloped the run-down building, completely shattering windows and crushing the weak wood. Strong vines were wrapped around it as well, with piercing thorns that could easily cut into flesh. The entire place looked like a greenhouse gone mad. _

_The girl, astonished, could not move for many minutes. And then, she slowly creaked into action, as though she was moving through mud. _

"_W-what happened…? Why are there plants everywhere…?" she mumbled, frightened. She painstakingly approached the broken door and stepped over it, slowly trudging into the structure. _

"_Auntie? Uncle? What happened…?" _

_She stopped outside a cracked doorframe, and cautiously stepped through._

_And screamed. _

_The room was practically washed with blood. Red splatters painted the walls and there were puddles of it everywhere. But that was not why she screamed._

_In the center of the room were two bloody, mangled bodies. The vines with long, sharp thorns had wrapped themselves around them, stabbing them in all directions. Blood seeped from any opening possible, and there were some hacked limbs as well. There was one that was a man…And one that was a woman. _

_I screamed as well. _

_But no one would come help me, no one would hear my silent shriek, for all those that had protected me were gone…_

_The child in white screeched for a few moments, before choking and horribly retching in a corner. Her body was shaking as she raised her eyes at the macabre scene._

"_Auntie…Uncle…" she rasped as she crawled toward the broken bodies. She was so scared, her entire frame shook, as though she was standing out in a blizzard. She stared at the figures on the floor with an unfathomable expression._

_Then a finger twitched._

_She let out a breathless cry but was silenced by sheer terror as the head of the body raised and looked at her with dead, bloodshot eyes. They belonged to the woman._

"_Ri-chan," she whispered, barely audible. However, it was too much and she violently coughed up a spew of blood, some of which hit the child's face. She flinched. _

"_I'll… never forgive…" the woman began. But before she could finish her sentence she choked up even more red, and her head fell to the floor, dead. _

_The shaking figure, the only live creature in the room, covered in the blood of the ones she murdered, let out a torturous bawl._

_Everything went black. _

_I was writhing. I was being tortured within inches of my sanity. I needed to get out. I needed escape. _

_But no, it didn't end. _

_The torment continued, and again there was a scene before me. It was dusk, the sky was an eerie burnt orange. There was a forest, which made dark silhouettes against the sky. In front of that forest was a large group of people, with sharp weapons and burning torches. And in front of that group was a girl with black hair donning a black kimono._

_They were all staring at something ahead._

_It was the girl in white, her body smeared with blood. Her green eyes, for once, lost their piercing stare. It was replaced with sheer fear. Her eyes were intensely focused on the girl with black tresses at the head of the group, who was staring at her with the same expression._

_A murmur ran through the crowd, and the lone figure cringed, as though she had been the brunt of a physical blow. _

"_Well, you know her or not?" a gruff, menacing voice snarled. The question was directed at the girl in the kimono._

_Confusion coated her green eyes as she stared at her younger sister, and she bit her lip. The smaller girl stared at her, pleading._

"_Please, Onee-chan…" she whimpered. Another murmur, this time angry, ran through the crowd. Another cringe._

_Her sister's breath came fast, and anguish glazed her face. _

"_I…I…" she stuttered._

"_Hurry up! The beast might strike!" a voice shouted out._

_The younger girl opened her mouth in protest. "I'm not a beast! I'm not a monster! Please—!" _

_She didn't get to finish. Someone growled and hurled a spear at her. The child yelped and dodged, the weapon lodging into the ground, its blade glinting murderously at its missed target._

_Even more disturbed, but undeterred, the girl continued. "Please, Onee-chan! I'm not a monster! You know me! I didn't do it on the purpose! You know… Please, don't leave me…" she trailed off, unable to continue._

_The sister was obviously fighting an inner dilemma. I knew what she was thinking. Would she convict her own sister and save herself? Or say yes, and be deemed an accomplice of a monster? _

_She reached a decision, and raised her head. Anguish and fear were palpable in her eyes._

"_No," she mumbled. "No, I don't know her." _

_And then slowly, as if for effect, she turned her back on the girl._

_Everything proceeded in slow motion._

_The mob roared and surged forward, brandishing their weapons. The girl seemed frozen for a second, staring at her sister, betrayal flooding her face. But when she finally acknowledged the mob, she squeaked and leapt up, running away, bitter tears streaming. _

_More flashes. A tiny girl running from bright flames. Fearful eyes being cast. Black tar being poured onto her retreating head…_

_Enough, I thought. ENOUGH! _

_At last, everything stopped. But that didn't affect anything._

_The darkness was blinding, engulfing, numbing. Yet I could still feel my body, and I made use of it. I crouched down, burying my dream face into my dream lap._

_Yes, I admit it. The girl with the short white hair was me. I had watched my sister rise to glory in both Soul Society and in my guardians' eyes, leaving me as a forgotten shadow in the dust. I grew bitter with jealousy, and soon I accused my aunt of being selfish and biased, seeing me as nothing but some shadow of another greater person they raised._

_I really was a selfish monster. _

_If I hadn't grown jealous, if I hadn't been so stupidly selfish, so possessive, then my aunt and uncle would not have been murdered by my hands. And my sister would not have left me. Who else was my aunt speaking of? I'm certain she was about to say that she could never forgive me._

_Did I deserve to die? I didn't know. I would leave that up to fate, if that even exists. I did not think I deserved to live, but I still didn't want to die. That puzzled me. What had I to live for? The few who truly cared about me were gone, and I didn't have anything else…_

_However, my sister's betrayal hit the hardest._

_No, it wasn't a betrayal. I deserved it. It was punishment, for the terrible sins I had committed. A consequence equal to the crime. But… that tragic day, my heart broke. My sister was closer to me than anyone else, and I felt something inside me was lost when she abandoned me. It just goes to show how monstrous I was; even my own family didn't want me anymore. _

_I wept._

_It was the only way to describe that sudden outpouring of emotions, of guilt, regret and anguish. I could not feel the tears, but I could feel those horrible feelings gushing out of me. My heart was broken, long gone, impossible to repair. Only hollowness occupied me now. And it only seemed to hurt even more. I'm surprised I wasn't a Hollow by now. But no matter how hard I tried, I will never fade away, into that blissful nothingness where emotions did not exist…_

_My life was an eternal night. I could not see where I was going; I only drifted. The darkness consumed any shred of light that came to me, any sense of hope I had. And I could not escape it. I could not be relinquished. _

_But as I confessed these things to myself, I felt something._

_I could not name it, it was only a feeling. And then it grew. And grew. And grew even more._

_Into flames. _

_It was so hot… A choking heat that ate away all oxygen, making it hard for me to breathe. I gasped in the dream way, and leapt up. _

_I was surrounded by fire._

_That day, when my heart was broken, and after I was chased away, I saw flames in the distance, burning my home. Those angry embers, flickering and devouring all of my past, would forever be etched into my mind. Ironic, how something so bright could leave me in such obscurity. _

_But the burning continued. _

_Past memories flashed. I could not name all of them, I only knew that they were not pleasant ones. And they were like real flames, burning away my skin, eating away anything that it touched. I had to escape._

_Why couldn't someone put the fire out? It left me dry and parched, nonetheless I screamed, a hoarse shriek that left me choking. I couldn't breathe, couldn't think. Painful recollections continued to eat me away, and I let out another wordless wail. Was this really a nightmare? There was no way; it was too real. _

_Someone please! Put it out! I pleaded. I thrashed and struggled and I even ran a few steps, but the flames that were my past stalked and beat upon me, threatening to engulf me. I continued to wither, and was about to give up…_

_When I felt a cool rush of air pass me. _

_It felt so nice, so refreshing, I stopped and luxuriated in the feeling… _

_And soon, the mere breeze became a blizzard._

_To my surprise, it was not the biting chill that normal cold went. It was like a cool river, washing away everything. It blew the furious inferno away, not even leaving any ashes. It caressed my body, and I felt drugged._

_This coolness, it was familiar. I had met the same iciness somewhere before… Ah, yes…_

_Toushirou… Captain Hitsugaya…_

_I felt a strange bliss as the cold gusted away the burning, the painful hotness. My mind began to close as I felt drowsier and drowsier…_

_I saw a strange flash of white before I drifted…_

* * *

***I almost felt like crying, writing this.

So now you know. It's kind of tough, seeing an OC of yours struggle, isn't it? Maybe it was a bit too clear to be dream, maybe it wasn't. But still, I kind of liked how this one turned out. Told you Aria was a big time masochist, didn't I? Not that she'll ever admit that.....

**LEAVE A REVIEW PLEASE!!!! **I love how so many people are faving my story! It's really making me happy! So leave a review while you're at it! If you have anything to say, like how good it was or suggestions, feel free to post it. I'm kind of sensitive to that stuff from the judging I received from that contest I told you about in the last chappie, BUT KEEP IT COMING! Tell me what'd you thought. And once again, be specific if you found any mistakes in here.


	14. Hemorrhage

***Hi everyone! I'm sorry for the wait, but writer's block is one of the most annoying, if not deadly, "diseases" in the world. So, if this chapter kind of sucks, I apologize in advance. This is all in third-person, just something to say so no one gets confused.

* * *

Toushirou had faced Hollows, Arrancar, and men with crazy world domination-driven plans, but never in his long lifetime had he ever prepared for something like this.

_She talks in her sleep…? _He thought, puzzled. It was an odd detail and he wasn't sure what to do about it.

_I really hope she doesn't do that when she… _

"Onee-chan…please…" Aria sighed on the other side of the couch.

"Onee-chan…?" Toushirou pondered. "She has a sister…?"

"I'm not a monster…please…"

He heard some rustling from here, and then silence.

The captain frowned. The third seat was obviously having a nightmare, but it seemed that it had subsided for now. The grimace still set on his face, he returned to his paperwork.

A breathless squeak deterred him from his work.

_What the…?_

He slowly rose from his seat and approached the sleeping figure.

The Aria on the couch right now was remarkably different than the peacefully slumbering figure minutes ago. Somehow she had silently contorted into an uncomfortable position, with her head hanging over the edge of the couch and her body bent over as though somehow had punched her in the stomach.

And most of all, he did not expect tears streaming down her face.

The captain felt something stir in his heart as he assessed the third seat. Her face was clearly displaying heavy anguish from the way her eyes were squeezed tightly shut and the way she bit her lip. And the way she held herself… It was as though she was putting all her energy into simply holding herself together, and she had only herself to find solace in, to hold what little comfort she had inside…

For the first time, Toushirou wondered about true pain. Sure, he had felt responsible for the death of one of his closest friends and he felt guilty that he couldn't protect Hinamori, but all his life he actually _had _someone. He had his grandmother and Hinamori, who he grew up with and knew him almost inside out. He had Rangiku, who, despite being one of the laziest people he had ever met, stayed by his side no matter what. And he really hated to admit it, even to himself, but he had comrades like Ichigo, who fought ferociously for his nakama (**A/N: **I use this word because "friends" just doesn't seem to cover it), even if they were simply people who fought by his side.

But what did Aria have?

She didn't have any friends, for her classmates and teachers shunned her. He had never seen or heard a trace of her parents or guardians, so they must have left her as well. And if she had a sister and she was whimpering about not being abandoned, then she couldn't possibly still be attached. And if she had any good memories, they were probably eclipsed by the horrible ones that seemed to shadow her every move.

That day, Toushirou Hitsugaya learned the meaning of true loneliness.

Sighing, he gingerly gripped Aria's bent form and hoisted her body so that the entire thing was on the couch. Physical contact was not something he welcomed easily, so his hands withdrew in an instant. But he was amazed at the contact. Aria's body was incredibly warm against his cool skin, and it wasn't that stifling heat most people emitted. And frankly, he wanted to bask in it. The heat wasn't like the scorching sun. How do you explain a light but firm heat?

"No, I didn't do it on purpose… I'm not…" Aria murmured, shaking Toushirou out of his musings. A little bewildered, he glanced at her face. And remembered that steady flow of tears.

Clumsily he wiped them away, not wanting to see them but worrying what would happen if she woke up and caught him doing it. It was to no avail. The tears lost were quickly replaced by an even stronger torrent.

Aria's frame began to rack with tiny shudders and she gripped herself tighter.

For the longest time, the captain did not know the reason behind tears. He couldn't even remember the last time he cried, if he ever did. He thought they were useless things, things that would betray your emotions and hold you back in more things than just battle. But today he learned another thing. When the body is overwhelmed and overflowing with any kind of feeling, tears would be shed to dispatch the excess, the amounts that the body and mind could not hold. Strangely, this almost always seemed to apply to sadness and anger.

"Why, Onee-chan, why…?" she whimpered.

_That's it, _Toushirou finalized. _That's it, I'm waking her up. _

He grabbed her shoulder and gave her a tiny shake, saying, "Hey, wake up."

No response.

His eyebrows furrowed and he shook her harder, trying to be gentle at the same time. She looked fragile enough as it is. Still no effect. Aria continued to mumble incoherently into space.

_Something's wrong, _he thought. Something unnatural was keeping her in this eternal nightmare.

Looking around, he noticed a white bottle on the table next to the couch. He picked it up and examined it, noticing that it did not bear the Fourth Division symbol. Which meant that Aria could not have gotten these from the healers and that they were probably untested and unreliable.

He shook the bottle for no good reason and proceeded to tossing them into the trash with a loud "thunk."

Turning his attention back to his subordinate, he was startled to see that her body seemed to be even more contorted, as though she was in severe pain.

"Please no…! Make it stop…!"

By now Aria was making hoarse, breathless shouts to no one in particular.

Toushirou knew that waking her up seemed impossible for now. The best he could do was to find some bizarre way to stop her nightmare.

That might be harder than he thought.

Aria seemed to truly be in pain. Her arms would sometimes randomly flail out, as though she was warding off an invisible army. Her shrieks only seemed to add effect. And her tears refused to cease.

The tenth captain learned something else that day. He learned that you don't have to be awake to feel pain.

Even so, for a girl who looked like she could break any moment she was quite hard to restrain. Aria's reiatsu felt restrained, but it writhed and thrashed about all the same. It was as if it was chained by something but it could still move slightly. Toushirou tried pinning her arms down but her flailing made it tough.

"Fire…! Fire…! Someone put it out…!" she begged hoarsely. The captain panicked when she coughed up some blood, but was soon relieved when he realized that she had only bit her lip.

_But still… She'll chew her mouth off if this keeps up. _

"Leave me alone… I don't… Stop…!" Aria continued to wail and cry.

Toushirou was preparing a kido spell in an effort to restrain her, but he still had no idea how to actually stop the nightmare.

Suddenly Aria's thrashing threw her off the couch. Startled Toushirou reacted out of reflex and caught her in his arms. Still driven by reflex, he automatically wrapped them around her tiny build.

Her thrashing slightly ceased, but she still continued to whimper. Her own arms suddenly came around his own body and her hands gripped his kimono desperately. As though she had nothing else to hang on to.

For a brief moment Toushirou panicked, for the first time in a while. The emotion connected with his reiatsu, and it flared.

That was all that it took.

When his reiatsu slipped from his control for a few mere seconds it managed to mingle in the air, touching Aria's own contorted energy. The moment they touched, her spiritual energy suddenly seemed to ice over, receding from its torturous form and settling back into her body, becoming a simple, emitted energy. Her struggling faded, but her grip on his kimono remained as tight as ever. Her weeping, thank goodness, had stopped as well, leaving only a few mumblings and sighs. She somehow managed to pull him closer to her.

"Toushirou…" she uttered clearly. He thought he saw her eyes flutter open for barely half a second at his head before they settled.

Said person jumped. It had been a while since anyone had called him that. It was either Hitsugaya-kun (and the occasional Shiro-chan) or just Captain. But Toushirou was something he hadn't heard in quite some time. Not to mention that she had said it so _clearly_….

Aria muttered something else and finally seemed to rest in peace, leaning against the captain's chest limply and loosening her grip on his clothes. But her arms remained where they were.

The young captain remained motionless for a few moments, checking to see if she would start again. However nothing was heard, save for the girl's even breathing.

Toushirou sighed and sat onto the couch himself. It had only been a few minutes, but dealing with his third seat had made him more weary than he needed.

_I could use some of that tea she made…_ He thought randomly. He set his body in motion and was about to shrug Aria off when all of a sudden her hands clenched again.

"Don't…go… Stay with me…" she spoke softly. There was no sadness in her voice this time; just a pleading request.

It was obvious to him that she wouldn't let him go for some time, so the captain remained on the couch with one arm slung loosely around her back. Surprisingly, he didn't mind. The light heat she was emanating was actually quite pleasant, a nice change from the coolness he was normally used to.

After a while, Aria's arms fell off. Toushirou adjusted his haori over the girl and went over back to his chair. He stared out the window into the sunset, the voice calling his name echoing in the depths of his mind…

* * *

***Grrrr....... Was it a bit rushed? This somehow turned out a bit shorter than I thought it would. Three pages.... Normally the average is five. Again, I blame writer's block. Gomen nasai everyone, if it sucked. *Sigh*...... If you find any grammatical mistakes, plz say so in your review!!!! **PLEASE REVIEW!!!!!!!!**

Random Rant: I've been reading the latest chapters of Bleach, and all I've thought it this: WHY THE HECK IS KUBO PIKCING ON MY FAVORITE CHARACTERS????? Hopefully I won't be spoiling anything for those who aren't up to date, but to those who are, I hope you do. First of all, you-know-who got you-know-what and then the other you-know-who got his you-know-what cut off. Well, actually the latter wasn't really the real deal (thank goodness!) but I'm still kind of mad of the first thing. Meh.


	15. Angel of the Full Moon

*****Hi again! It's me! Sorry for the delay! I've been so darned busy with writing other things lately...arg.... So to make it up to you guys, here's a nice long chappie for you to read. Almost 10 pages I think. I finished in a whole day, haha. And let me tell you, getting my thoughts onto paper was **_**not **_**the easiest thing in the world.... **

**Note: There's a bit of OOCness towards the end, at least in my opinion. But I don't think it's that bad.** **And one more thing: when I put *** it means time has passed but it's still the same POV. Enjoy!**

* * *

The room was blurry as my sleep-driven eyes opened.

I was lying on my stomach, definitely not in the original position I thought I had fallen asleep in. And something else: I remember quite clearly that my head was on the other side of the couch when I had fallen asleep.

_What the heck…? _I thought as I tried to get up.

I slipped and I somehow flipped myself off the couch.

"Gah!" I hissed as my forehead came in collision with the wooden floor. Gripping my head gingerly and biting my lip in pain, I realized that there was something that had fallen along with my body. Slowly sitting up I grabbed the cloth and examined it. To my utter shock, it was a captain's haori with the symbol for the number ten on it. That meant…

A muffled snort from across the room brought me back to my senses. Discreetly I turned my head and immediately recognized my captain's spiky white head. He didn't seem to have noticed my falling off the couch, but he probably hid it behind that icy mask of his. Who wouldn't have noticed?

Had he just laughed? Or was he scoffing my clumsiness?

I didn't know what to do with the haori, as he didn't show any sign of wanting it back, so I hesitantly draped it over my body as I pulled myself back onto the couch, throwing an arm over my eyes.

The black fabric of my uniform thankfully blocked the seemingly bright lights from my still-sensitive eyes, allowing some peace to think. Unfortunately, due to the clarity of that nightmare, I could remember all the details. I cursed to myself in my mind, but it continued to drift back to my past…

My sister and I had been together for…well…as long as I could remember. Our parents had died when we were still very young; only my sister had remembered anything at all, and even then the memories were blurry. From what I remember my aunt telling us, both of our parents were Soul Reapers, which would explain where we inherited our spiritual energy. My mother had contracted an illness a year or two after my birth, and she died shortly after. My father, ridden with grief, was too distracted by that during a mission in the world of the living, and was killed by a Hollow. Any more details were unknown, as our aunt and uncle refused to tell us anymore, no matter how much we pestered them. They promised that they would tell us when we got older, but obviously that day never came.

I kept thinking about my past, even though my chest ached with every memory. I tried to ignore it. I forced myself to dredge up the happiest memories I had. I refused to allow my worst memories to rule my life. As much as I wanted to fade away, I still felt an instinctive fear that I could not control. What a human I was…And yet…

"You know, if you're awake, you could at least help me with these."

I yelped and was so startled that I once again tumbled off the couch, this time landing on my back.

_Oh, bloody thorns… _I thought as I rubbed my backside. I looked up as I did so, and noticed the captain watching me with one eyebrow raised.

"Um, oh, yes, right away sir!" I stuttered, leaping up. I felt so stupid for forgetting he was there. I bet there were at least five sweat drops on his head by now.

"I'd like my haori back too."

"Yes sir…"

Flushed, I handed him back his captain's robe and hoisted some papers over to the couch as he put it back on. It was then that something occurred to me.

"Um… Captain?"

"What?"

"I was just wondering…how did I end up with your haori anyway?"

There was silence, and I turned around to make sure he had heard me. His face was turned away from the paperwork in front of him, staring off into space with that same stern expression. I blushed even harder.

"Uh… If you don't want to answer…"

"There weren't any blankets around, and I didn't want you to freeze," he said briskly, returning to his work.

I stared at him for a few more seconds before doing the same.

_I see, _I thought. Unexpectedly a small smile graced my face. _He really is a kind person after all…_

I've always wondered what lay behind that cold face of his. I wasn't sure if it really was his true nature or if it was simply a mask he puts on. Lately however, my suspicions had gradually shifted to the latter. The smile still set on my lips, I began my own work.

Only half an hour passed before I heard my captain set down his brush.

"I'm going outside," he announced bluntly before vanishing out the door.

Despite the fact that no one was in the room with me, I still nodded a bit. He usually dismissed me like this when he wanted me to come out and train. It was one of the few things that I actually looked forward to in the day. I still couldn't believe that Captain Hitsugaya would set aside time _every single night _for my training.

Truthfully, I felt happy about this.

I leaped off the couch and exited the room myself.

***

It was a clear night when I went outside, save for a few puffy clouds. The full moon itself was hidden slightly behind a cloud, but it still shone brightly, along with the stars. I inhaled the crisp night air as I walked to the usual training area. My hair swayed casually in the breeze, since I never wore my hair ribbons during training. Still, I had to see so I pinned it up with some normal hairpins.

He was waiting, as usual, leaning against the trunk of a large tree. I stopped a few feet away from him, wordlessly awaiting instructions.

"You know what to do. Sit down and show me."

I nodded and sat down. Frankly I was still exhausted from my ordeals, but I pushed it away. This realization had brought back memories of the fire and the nightmare rushing back to me, dissipating my pleasant mood and replacing it with a stony silence. The message sent through the fire was clear: kill the monster. And that nightmare had just explained how right that accusation was...

I wished I had a heart of stone, so that none of these things would affect me, cause me to feel this hollow throbbing in my chest. But I knew that was impossible. My heart had broken long ago. And I was still searching within myself for the pieces. But did I have the courage to put it back together again? What would happen if it was simply shattered once more?

It would never end, would it?

I sighed and began to drain my mind of all feeling…

* * *

Toushirou watched his third seat carefully as her reiatsu began to gradually calm down. He observed in fascination as the wild flames that were her energy began to recede and lose its untamed appearance and become a simple emitted aura. Her reiatsu was somehow always stronger at this time, but he had never figured out why. Lately Aria had been getting quite good at this particular technique, so tonight he decided to move on.

"Alright, now keep it like that," he instructed. "I want you to try something new. It'll help you with better concentrating your reiatsu without wreaking havoc everywhere."

He knew she was listening even though her eyes were closed. She was almost always listening. Toushirou had learned that Aria was the kind of person who was completely content in sitting in the background, listening. She was very aware of her environment. And why shouldn't she be? With those piercing green eyes it feels as though she can see right through you. It was a quality that the young captain liked very much about her.

"Pull your reiatsu inside yourself and focus it into…I don't know…a particular point. Try not to have it slipping out while you're doing that."

He eyed the girl carefully. As expected, she was having trouble pulling all her power in without it spilling all over. Streams of it flickered and flowed from her body and she struggled to hold them back. He was actually making this up as he went along; controlling reiatsu had not been a huge problem for him. She was a quick learner though; he wouldn't be surprised if she had it figured out in a week. For a while, all was quiet.

And yet it irked him. The silence. Toushirou continued to look at Aria. She had not said a word since she first came out. Somehow he found her calmness unnatural, as though she was emitting an aura of quiet desolation. Her face explained nothing; the only thing visible was her concentration. Yet he knew that she was all but happy inside.

_So she hides behind a mask as well…_ He pondered. When her eyes were closed, Aria's face was quite unreadable sometimes. She could somehow haul all that sorrow and anguish back and cover it with an emotionless front. It reminded him… a bit of himself, actually. And it's because of this fact that really frustrated him. What was that girl thinking?

Considering what had happened today, he wouldn't be surprised if she was still thinking about the fire and even the nightmare. It must have been a very long day for her. A three-hour long nap wouldn't be able to change that. Yet she hadn't expressed even a hint of anger toward today's events. Not even a glimmer of frustration could be seen. And that is what vexed him the most.

Toushirou looked up at the blackened sky. The bright white moon was now even more obscured by the illuminated clouds surrounding it. Sometimes when he gazed up at the stars he wondered what it was like, being all the way up there and staring down at everything. Would you be able to see everything from up there or just a wide view of one thing? If, hypothetically, there was someone up there, staring down at the two of them right at this moment, what would that person say?

"It's beautiful, isn't it?"

The captain jumped, but he hid it well. Turning his head, his attention went back to Aria.

_Was she just talking to me?_

Aria was simply staring off into space, not focusing on anything in particular. While she was still trying to concentrate her reiatsu, it was sporadic and irregular, as though she was only trying halfheartedly.

"I remember I used to watch the moon and the stars…back home…" she said dreamily.

It was the most Toushirou had ever heard her share willingly. Discreetly he listened intently, hoping to glean some more information about her past.

"We always watched the sky in the summer…The sky was clearer than it is over here…"

_We? _Toushirou thought. And then he remembered her mumbling in her sleep.

_What could her sister possibly do that made her end up like this? _Of course, he knew that it would take a lot of effort for Aria to part with that kind of information.

"She would always tease me, but I never really minded…She was…my best friend…So why…?"

Toushirou edged closer, his undivided attention focused solely on his subordinate. However, Aria fell silent after that remark, but her reiatsu was very still. Toushirou was now convinced that she was completely out of it. He stepped closer to her, taking a look at her face. Sure enough, it was blank, showing no sign that her mind was in the present. And yet…there was something about her eyes that he just didn't like. They were distant, obviously, but they had somehow lost their sharpness and were replaced by dullness. What was the word for that…?

A cool breeze roused the captain out of his musings. Aria was still sitting there, her reiatsu at rest. Her eyes were still glazed over. He had no idea of the time, but he did know that they should be getting inside soon. He knew he himself could withstand the chill but he was not quite sure about his third seat.

"We're done for the day. Let's go, Miyamoto-san."

Aria jumped, her eyes returning to awareness. "Ah, yes sir," she stuttered as she dusted herself off. Her captain was already walking back inside and she hurried (and stumbled) to catch up with him.

The pair was silent for the most part as they tread quietly through the Squad 10 barracks, Toushirou in front with a silent Aria a few steps behind him. And again, the silenced bothered him.

At last he couldn't take it anymore and he abruptly stopped. Aria, seeming to have spaced out again, bumped into him. Ignoring that, he turned sharply and looked her right in the eye.

"Hey, I have a question for you," he said bluntly.

"Y-yes?" Aria stammered, rubbing her face where she had bumped him.

At first the captain didn't know how to approach the topic. Small talk was never his specialty, and this was as awkward and candid as it could get. In the end he simply gave up and resorted to just saying it straight out.

"Why isn't it that you're upset over the fire? You're just standing there as though nothing happened! You've had one hell of a day but I haven't heard a single complaint out of you. What's wrong with you?"

Aria's mouth twitched downwards when he said that last sentence and Toushirou instantly regretted it. However she didn't look extremely bothered by it as far as he could see.

"I'm not upset…" she started.

"I can see that. What I want to know is _why. _Anyone else would have at least have shown a little more of a reaction that just…than just accepting it and waiting for it to happen again!"

Aria said nothing. She simply stared at her captain.

And that's how he got his answer.

_Of course, _he thought. _She's probably had to deal with this for a long time. She's "used to it" by now. But still…_

"You know, doing something about it doesn't hurt," he barked sharply.

She gave a small sigh. "But what can I do? Tell me, Captain, what can I do? It's not something that I'm actually doing that's causing all this. No, it's simply because of something I _am. _How can I change who I am? It's like…planting a rose seed and trying to grow a tulip."

Toushirou twitched but he knew she was right. It's not like she did anything truly monstrous in her past…right?

Aria was looking down at the floor and she spoke again, in an even quieter voice. "And even if I did do something, it's not like it will make anything better. It might even make things worse. Nothing will change. I'll still be me, Aria, the monster, the witch… The only thing I can do is accept and move on. It's useless for me to try."

For the first time he met her, Toushirou heard bitterness in her voice, especially in that last sentence. Was she really that hopeless? Did she really believe that nothing could change, that her life couldn't get better? Was she really just go around just accepting this?

"What a masochist…" he muttered to himself. Her head snapped up, startled.

"What…did you just say?"

"Ah, nothing. Come on, let's go back to the office. You left your sword there."

The captain continued walking along, his third seat still behind him, possibly even more distant than before the conversation.

"And besides, it's not like I don't deserve it," someone said from behind him, in a voice so soft that he could have imagined it.

"Did you say something?"

"Huh? Uh, no."

He was still skeptical, but did not press the issue. And so he and his third seat continued to saunter along, with nothing but a wall of silent despondency between them.

* * *

"Captain, have you seen a white bottle anywhere?"

His head peered around the slide door. "A white bottle?"

"Uh, yes…It's a small one, and it's just white…"

I heard a snort. "That thing? I threw it into the trash. Have you ever heard never to take candy from strangers, Miyamoto-san? Same thing applies here: never eat any kind of medicine unauthorized by Squad 4."

"Umm…"

"That bottle wasn't marked with the Squad 4 insignia. That means it's untested and unreliable. Where did you get that thing, anyway?"

_What?? _I thought incredulously. _Sawahata-kun gave me something like that? _

_Hmm…Normally I would do otherwise, but right now I think I'll let your temper slide, _Kurobararyu said, now fully awake from her nap, which was probably better than mine.

And I _was _mad. Well, maybe not mad, but definitely irritated, that's for sure. My hands were just itching to grab Kuro and marching over and slicing him up right now. I plan on having a little…_chit-chat _with Sawahata-kun sometime in the near future about this.

_By chit-chat, you mean beating him until his eyeballs pop out._

_Oh, quiet. You're not helping. _

Trying to stifle my annoyance (or anger; I really wasn't sure) I hastily tied Kuro around my left shoulder and walked out, perhaps with a bit more steam to it than I wanted. I wasn't sure if my appearance amused my captain or not, but thank goodness all he did was raise an eyebrow and stride off.

"Follow me. We're going to get you some new uniforms," he explained in quick manner. I followed him, trying to catch up.

Once my arms were full of clothes I continued to following my captain. It was then that I realized that I had no idea where I was staying.

_You just realized that? _

_How many times have I told you to be quiet? _

_Fine, Miss Grumpy-Pants…_

I pretended I didn't hear that.

I didn't really see a need to ask Captain Hitsugaya where we were going, seeing how I would see soon enough. But then we began taking turns that I've never walked before. _Where in the Soul Society are we going? _

At last we stopped. I looked around, utterly confused. There were other rooms around, but it looked like they were preoccupied. Where would I be sleeping?

Captain Hitsugaya must have caught my bewildered expression because then he clarified, "That's right. You've never seen my room before, have you?"

I stared at him and he gestured to the door next to us. It indeed looked like it was fit for a captain. The door was larger than the others and it looked better maintained. But what did this have anything to do with where I was staying?

When I looked back at him, questions visible in my eyes, I thought I saw a hint of pink spreading across the captain's face. And this only confused me even more.

"Miyamoto-san…" he started. He honestly looked like he was at a loss of words. "I don't know how to tell you this but… We don't have any other rooms prepared right at the moment, since the new section of the barracks is still under construction… And it will take a couple of weeks before your room is repaired…So in the meantime, you'll be sleeping in my room." He paused, looking away.

"Oh."

Was that why he was blushing? It made sense: a captain having to share a room with a third seat! This must have been a serious blow to his pride…

_I don't think that's why he's embarrassed, _Kuro uncharacteristically giggled in my head.

_Well, what do you think? _

But she had disappeared.

The pink still evident on his cheeks, Captain Hitsugaya pushed opened his door and motioned me to go in. When I stepped inside it was dark, but it looked bigger than my previous room, and maybe even more lavish. Not that I expected anything less from the room of a captain. I looked around and placed Kuro on the edge of a desk.

Captain Hitsugaya beckoned me over. "There's a bathroom over there, you can wash up in there. I'll wait."

I bustled in, not wanting to make him wait very long.

***

When I had finished washing up and changing, I was only wearing a white sleeveless shirt along with thin hakama pants the same color. When I came out Captain Hitsugaya was pulling something out from a closet.

"You take the bed. I'll take the floor," he grunted. I stared incredulously.

"Wha…? Ah, no, Captain, that's fine. I'll sleep on the floor." I couldn't possibly sleep in a captain's bed. While it was probably no different than any other, it still didn't feel right.

My captain stopped tugging and eyed me. "You think I'm going to let a girl sleep on the floor?"

"Yes."

He shook his head. "No. You're sleeping on the bed."

There was no point in arguing about this. I simply strode over and pulled out a futon from the closet and walked over to an empty area of floor, setting the futon there. Then I plopped onto it, crossing my arms and showing no sign of letting up.

My captain stared at me before letting out a short sigh. "You're a stubborn one," I heard him mutter before he went into the bathroom himself. I nodded to myself, satisfied.

I was idly sitting there, gazing out the window at the full moon, when I heard the door open. I turned around, wanting to say thank you, when the words caught on my lips. Captain Hitsugaya was standing there, with black pants on, and _no shirt. _His chest was bare for the world to see. He may look small, but he had a muscular and finely sculpted chest. In all honesty, I couldn't look away. And that made me blush tomato red.

_Whoa….Oh, bloody thorns…_

_You know you like looking at that. _

_Wha…? SHUT UP, KURO!_

She giggled but said no more.

By now my face was so hot and red that you could probably use it as a night light. I tried to put my hands on my face inconspicuously, since my neck was not working for reasons I will not say. My eyes followed my captain as he walked over and sat on the bed. He eyed me.

"Like what you see?" he asked, completely without emotion.

I must have jumped at least three feet into the air when he said that. My face was getting redder and redder, if that was even possible.

"Ah, no I don't…I mean! Yes, I do! _I mean!_ It's that you're not attractive, Captain, I mean! I guess you are pretty good-looking _and_ _no that's not what I'm trying to say either! _Wait, wait, wait, I take that back—!"

A cross between a snort and a cough came from my captain's direction and I stopped my spluttering before I made things worse. Kuro was laughing her head off in my own head right now. I tried to ignore her. Me? I was just sitting there like an idiot, waiting for a reaction. Though I couldn't see very well in the dark, I could have sworn that Captain Hitsugaya was holding back a laugh.

"Go to sleep, Miyamoto-san," he ordered, adjusting his position so that he was lying on the bed. Utterly speechless from embarrassment, I did the same, crawling into the thick futon.

And then I remembered something. How was I supposed to sleep without those pills that Sawahata-kun gave me? I shook my head. Those things probably made things worse. I'd much rather wake up from a nightmare and get almost no sleep than to be stuck in one for a long time.

Either way, I would be having nightmares. The thought haunted me for the longest time, and I couldn't sleep. I wasn't sure if my captain was, but I tried focusing on the sound his even breathing to calm me down.

Eventually my lids began to droop and the warmth of the blanket began to make me drowsy. I don't know how long my nap was, but I don't think it was enough to make me not tired for the rest of the day. After a day of physical and mental exhaustion, I gladly sank under the tempting darkness…

_

* * *

_

_About time,_ Toushirou thought as Aria's reiatsu finally became restful. No wonder she's been having those purple shadows under eyes, if she's been sleeping like this.

The boy waited a few moments, staring up at his ceiling.. To pass the time, he thought about Aria's reaction to his little "question" earlier. Truthfully it really did entertain him greatly, watching her shocked face like that. He was extremely close to laughing out loud when she was spluttering her astonishment. Gently he chuckled to himself.

A rustle from nearby stopped his merriment and had him sitting up, staring at Aria's sleeping form. Sure enough, she was restlessly turning in her sleep, whimpering inaudible words.

Toushirou slipped off the bed and knelt by his third seat. She was scrunched up into a ball, just like this afternoon. While she was still mumbling in her sleep, she was no longer shrieking the words out, though it seems she was still having a nightmare. As gently as he could, Toushirou hoisted her out of the futon and set her onto the mattress, covering her with a blanket. As hard as he tried, he couldn't avoid jostling her a bit, at which Aria stirred a bit, causing him to freeze for a few seconds before she would fall back asleep.

This was his plan all along. Despite having a cold attitude, he could be just as stubborn as Aria. Due to a sudden rise in chivalry, he didn't exactly like the idea of his third seat sleeping on the floor and planned on switching places with her while she was asleep.

A sigh brought Toushirou's attention back to Aria as she turned over on the bed. She looked so…sad. Even sadder than when she was awake. Was it because during the day she was not constantly confronted of memories of her past?

Seeing the girl in this state made Toushirou want to stay next to her for just a few more moments. His conscience would be forever haunting him if he let a suffering girl alone when he was only a few feet away.

But what can I do? Last time this happened, trying to wake her up was completely useless…

And then he recalled her reaction when he released his reiatsu.

Well, it's worth a try.

Lying down next to Aria he watched her for a few seconds. Then he turned over and hesitantly put one arm over her petite form. Even now she still emitted that comforting heat. He would have liked to stay like this a bit longer, but if he fell asleep like this she would surely ask questions in the morning. So he would have to get the job done quickly.

Toushirou closed his eyes and summoned his reiatsu. He only released a little bit, so none of the night guards would be alarmed. And sure enough it had the exact effect he was hoping for.

Aria's flickering reiatsu slowly ebbed and calmed down. Her whimpering stopped and she looked much more comfortable on the bed. And…was there a small smile on her lips? Toushirou reluctantly moved his arm away as Aria turned over, whispering something he did not hear.

He stayed in the bed a while longer, propping himself up into a sitting position. There was no sound besides Aria's now peaceful breathing.

During this time, Toushirou's mind wandered all the way back to when he first met the white-haired girl. Back then, she didn't even seem like the kind of person who could smile. And now she was giving off tiny smirks. While it wasn't much, it was definitely a start. And then he remembered a remark he made back at the Academy.

"Captain, I really don't understand. Why is it that you're so attached to Ri-chan?"

"That girl… She's reminds me of Hinamori."

In retrospect, he realized that wasn't correct. While Hinamori and Aria had a few similarities, it wasn't the precise reason that he was "attached" to her. That palpable sorrow, the visible anguish…These emotions should never have appeared on such a face. Being one that uses a cold front, he was adept at reading people behind the face. And whenever he looked at Aria, a lot of things passed through his mind. Serenity, kindness and even beauty. Those characteristics conflicted horribly with the emotions Aria was currently feeling. He didn't want to see those kind of feelings churning inside her. And he had a feeling that with some extra training, she could become an extraordinary Soul Reaper. She just needed someone to guide her…

Toushirou thought back a few years, to a time before the Winter War. To that time when he fought Gin Ichimaru on the Seireitei grounds.

"You are a heavenly white angel that blesses Soul Society once a century."

An angel…Until now, the comment had never really made much of an impression on the young captain. But now…Could he be the one to guide Aria onto the right path? Could he be…her angel? The actual wording sounding ridiculous, but he thought about it for a bit. The one who would guide others to the light…to him that is what angels were. And what he resolved to be. For Aria.

A sliver of moonlight peered through the window and fell upon both white-haired children. In the pale light, Aria's hair could sometimes be considered paler than her captain's. Hair as white as freshly fallen snow in winter, but with eyes as green as spring. Something like that should never have to feel bitterness and sadness.

He remembered the look she had when she was training. That distant, dull look. He finally remembered the word for that look.

Lifeless. That was the term. At that moment Aria had looked as though all the life had been drained out of her. It was incredibly haunting to see that expression on a face like hers. He never wanted to see that look on her ever again.

Toushirou took one last look at his subordinate before softly getting off the bed and slipping onto the futon she had set out. He thought about the moon, something that faded away but would always come back, glowing and all. He had read somewhere that we could only see one side of the moon—the other side was filled with craters.

It hides its wounds but continues to shine… Perhaps Aria could be something like that…the moon…

Feathers fluttering across the white orb in the sky were his last thought before he went under…

**

* * *

**

***I apologize for all the POV changes. I am never doing a story like this ever again!! I'm not saying that I'm going to change the style of it, no way. I'm sticking with it till the end. I'm just saying I've learned my lesson. I'm so moving over to third person.....Also, I apologize if there are a lot of grammatical mistakes. It was a long day full of typing, and I really wasn't in the mood of checking this over. I finished this, what, at 11:30 at night? If you find any, please say so in a review.

**Oh, and did any of you catch the thing with the title of this chappie? I read online that Hyorinmaru idiomatically meant "frozen full moon" or something like that in Japanese. So I just kind of incorporated that. Coming up with a good wording of the title wasn't easy though. **

_**PLEASE REVIEW!!!!!**_


	16. Chit Chat

*****Aloha everyone! It's finally summer!!! Yay!!!! I finally have more free time, so I'll probably be able to update sooner. But it's not a guarantee, since I might just be screwing around on other things. Anyway, this chapter was originally supposed to be a lot longer, but it got too long so I had to cut it into two parts. And I've been having stupid writer's block with this because it's one of those intermission scenes that's not really one of the big important parts that I was thinking of. Grr.....I hate filler chapters.... So if it's a bit off, I apologize in advance.**

**Oh, and a warning: This chapter contains more swearing than the usual amount. I didn't use any new words; it just has more than the usual amount because **_**someone **_**here got a bit testy. **

* * *

I awoke for the second time, this time to a ray of sunshine beaming through the window.

I groaned and rolled over, my arm hanging over the edge.

Wait. Edge?

I forced my eyes to open and I saw that I wasn't on the floor. Hadn't I fallen asleep on a futon last night? Pushing myself up, I realized that I was on an actual bed. How in the world did I get up here?

_About time you got up. I've been waiting forever, _Kuro greeted.

_You should remember that not everyone is a freak like you and wakes up at five in the morning, _I retorted.

_True, but you're pretty close, considering the fact that you always wake up around six to seven. I guess you're what you humans call a "morning person." _

_Whatever. By the way, how did I get up here?_

_Look at the floor. _

I did as she said and my eyes widened. Sleeping on the futon where I was supposed to be was Captain Hitsugaya. Turned on his side he looked like he was still deeply asleep.

_He must have switched places with me while I was asleep, _I pondered.

_That's…really sweet. You can tell how much he wanted you to sleep on the bed. _

_Well…If he really wants that, I might as well let him be a gentleman and have his way. _

My eyes still on my captain I silently stepped off the bed and retrieved Kuro from the desk. Absolutely unable to resist I went over to his side and leaned over, trying to see his face. Strangely the stern expression was still there, but it was not as severe as it normally was when he was awake. He looked…almost innocent. I couldn't help myself; I smiled.

_You've been doing that a lot lately, _my sword remarked, sounding rather cheerful.

_Huh? Doing what?_

_Smiling. You're doing it almost every day now. Even during your insomniac days you would at least give a tiny smile. You've been so much happier lately, Aria. It's even gotten me cheerful. _

_I guess you're right…Hmm. My nightmares…They weren't as vivid as they normally were. Why is that? _

_Don't ask me. I was already asleep. _

Feeling thoroughly rejuvenated I sprang up and rushed into the bathroom with a set of robes. Having no nightmares to haunt my sleep made me feel cheerful. To finally be free of those terrible memories! Not to mention having a decent night of sleep for once! I walked out with a spring in my step. One night wasn't enough to have me fully catch up on my sleep, but it sure did put me in good spirits.

After eating some breakfast I ambled back to the office, plopping onto the couch. It seemed to soak up my good mood, since it looked brighter. Having nothing else to do I walked around, retrieving papers scattered around the room and tidying up a bit. Once that was done I picked up a pile of papers I had set up and went over to do them.

It was quiet as I worked. I glanced at the clock. 7:30.

Yes, I had gotten up much too early for there to be many people wandering about. I had always been like that, always getting up earlier than everyone else and then going to sleep earlier as well.

_Like an actual plant…Opening their petals when the sun comes up and closing them the moment it goes down…_

Flowers.

An idea came to me. I got off the couch and walked out of the office, heading toward the Squad 10 gardens. Every squad had a garden, each with its own kinds of flowers. I hoped that ours would have the kind I was looking for.

_Daffodils, daffodils…_ I listed in my head as I walked through the gardens. Seriously though, this place was full of daffodils! I liked them just as much as any other kind of flower but really?

As I began to wander deeper into the gardens I at last spotted different kinds of flowers amid the mass of daffodils. Lilies, tulips, azaleas… This was a beautiful area and I thoroughly enjoyed being here. But I happened to notice that garden had many wilting flowers and also many that were overgrowing. How long had it been since someone had tended to them?

_I wonder if the captain will let me…No, of course he wouldn't. _

I breathed in the fragrances of each flower. They murmured a sleepy greeting as I passed them. But did this garden have the kind I was searching for?

Yes! They did! I bent over and sniffed them, a vague scent drifting into my nose. My favorite. I selected a few and picked them, bundling them into my arms and then returning to the Squad 10 office.

* * *

With a muffled groan, Toshiro himself rolled over and blocked his eyes from the muted sunshine.

_Mmm… Might as well get up, seeing how I'm already awake. Lots of paperwork left to do…_

He stayed in that position a bit longer before uncovering his eyes. Obviously disgruntled he scratched his head, and looked around, confused about why he was sleeping on the floor.

_You don't remember, master? _A powerful, resounding voice boomed in his head.

_It's been a while since we've talked, Hyorinmaru. _

_It's incredible how you don't remember after simply a night's rest. _

…_I'm trying my best here._

_Let me give you the hint: this was the first night the girl stayed here, remember? _

Toshro automatically snapped up, the memories rushing back to him so fast his mind was suffering recoil. He swerved his head toward the bed, and was positively shocked that it was empty.

_Where in the world is she?!_

_I seem to remember her zanpakuto speaking with her an hour or two ago. _

_You can sense her sword's presence?_

_Zanpakutos can always sense each other, Toshiro Hitsugaya. We can even communicate with each other. Remember that. _

The young captain glanced at the clock. Eight thirty.

_I can't believe she could wake up so early, _he thought, amazed. _Absolutely no one in the entire squad can get up that early, not even me. _

_The girl has a plant-type zanpakutou. She blooms with the sun and folds with the moon. It is no surprise that she is able to rise so early in the morning. _

Toushirou disregarded his sword's chilling tone and looked around the room, seeing signs everywhere of Aria's early wake-up. The bed was neatly made, the blanket smoothed to perfection. A set of fresh robes was missing, along with her zanpakuto that he remembered was placed on the desk. She could obviously take good care of herself, but did he really expect anything else?

_I wonder what she's doing now…_ he wondered idly as he himself rose to get ready for the day.

***

The 10th captain walked down the quiet halls of his barracks in thought, not really paying attention to where his feet were going. He had been down this way so often that he didn't really even need to think about it anymore. There was hardly anyone about, even though it was already 9:15.

_Lazy little…Matsumoto's habits are catching on, _Toshiro thought crossly. He twitched at the thought of his lieutenant having a terrible hangover with her "drinking buddies" at a bar at who-knows-where. Ever since Aria had been recruited he had seen her less and less in her designated place, the office. He vowed that to himself that if she kept this up he really would freeze her behind to a chair. And use heavy-duty chains, just in case.

He was so engrossed in his thoughts that he didn't really sense anything as he approached the office door. Absentmindedly he grabbed the handle and pulled it open.

He blinked as he found his third seat bent over the table, her brush neatly writing across the sheet. At the sound of the opening door, her head went up.

Toushirou could almost immediately see the difference after just one night of peaceful sleep. While the shadows were still there, they seemed less prominent against her pale face. Her expression seemed a bit brighter and her emerald eyes regained some of that sharpness that was lost when she wasn't sleeping. In truth, he was a bit stunned. One night was all it took? One night of staying by her side? He felt small, unfamiliar warmth in his chest as he thought of how he helped her.

"Morning," she greeted, promptly returning to her work. This too was another sign of how her condition had improved. She rarely ever greeted him at all, usually only resorting to small nods and other gestures of acknowledgement. He did not say anything back; instead he glanced around, assessing the room. It was much neater than usual, as there weren't any random pieces of paper lying around, which was mostly the reason why the room was so cluttered in the first place. As his eyes roamed the room, his gaze settled on something on his desk.

Roses. A vase containing white roses. They sat there, a significant sign of beauty in the normally drab office. This was the first time he could remember that anyone had ever placed flowers in this room. Silently he strode over, taking a closer look at the rosy bouquet. It looked like each flower was picked carefully; all of them were healthy and blooming beautifully. Even a few tiny drops of dew were still left on them. Carefully Toushirou reached out, stroking a soft, smooth petal.

"Did you put these here?" he asked, turning his head.

"Mmhmm," she confirmed. "I thought the room could use a bit more brightening."

Indeed she was right. The new signs of life in the room gave it a livelier atmosphere, the stark whiteness brightly catching the light and casting it about.

The captain at last turned his attention away from the new spray of blossoms and turned his stare back to his third seat. He noticed that a rather large stack of papers were sitting on the table next to Aria's working figure. Looking around, he also noticed that there was hardly any paperwork left.

"Wha…Did you…finish all the paperwork?" he asked incredulously.

Aria nodded, clearly focused on the task at hand. "Almost done."

The captain ran a hand through his hair. _What am I supposed to do now? _Paperwork was something he did most of the time and it was rare that it was all finished. And when it was, it took him so much time to do it that usually another few stacks would already be on their way.

_Was this all she'd been doing for the last few hours? _

"Finished," Aria muttered, placing the sheet onto the large stack. She gingerly placed her brush onto the inkpad and sat back onto the couch, staring out into space.

_Damn, she's quick. But even so, working's been the only thing she's been doing ever since she got here. She needs a break. _

"Miyamoto-san," he called out, sitting down behind his desk. She turned, her expression showing eagerness at something else to do.

"If you're all finished," he said unnecessarily, "go…make some tea."

Giving a small nod of affirmation the third seat stood up and went for the door.

* * *

I made for the door, for some reason carrying Kuro with me.

_What, Aria can't even make some tea without me reminding you not to touch it while it's hot? _Kuro teased lightly.

_Oh, zip it. I'm only bringing you for some company. There's no one around and I think it's too quiet._

_I thought you didn't like crowds._

…_.I don't._

_So why do you miss the constant ruckus of the barracks? _

I had no answer for that. I thought I didn't like crowds either but…

_Things change. _

_Exactly, Aria. Exactly. _

What was that supposed to mean?

I came to the door, at last reaching and grasping the handle. But before I could pull it open, something caught my eye.

In that corner there was a small trash bin, and there was one lone object sitting inside. On closer inspection, it was a white bottle.

My white bottle.

I twitched, the memories from last night crashing down on me_. _

"_That bottle wasn't marked with the Squad 4 insignia. That means it's untested and unreliable." _

So Sawahata-kun was the cause of my having the nightmare.

No, it wasn't right to blame him for that. I had no proof he was the cause of that terrible dream. But I _could _blame him for me not being able to wake up from it. Which was the exact reason I was angry at him. I knew it was petty to be so, but I really had no control over my emotions. White hot anger pulsed through me, but luckily my hair ribbons that I put on this morning suppressed some of the reiatsu that would have leaked due to it. My anger was only slightly stifled.

_He made me face those terrible memories…_

That was the only thought in my head as I walked over to the bin, trying to be as casual as possible, and picked up the white bottle. It was still the same weight as it was when I first received.

_Good. I can use that to my advantage…_

_What are you scheming, Aria?_

_Oh, nothing in particular. _

Kuro left the confines of my mind, searching for the answer to her question, though she probably already knew. Pocketing the accursed container I headed to the door once more.

"What are you doing with that bottle, Miyamoto-san?"

I froze, my hand on the door once again. Of course he would notice. It's not like I was being stealthy about it.

"Taking out the trash," was my response exiting the room and closing the door with a snap.

I strut down the halls with an almost bull-like gait, my eyes darting around, trying to find my target.

_Where is he…?_

_Erm…What happened to making tea?_

_Later. I need to take care of this._

There were other Soul Reapers beginning to inhabit the Squad 10 hallways. There were two things about that. One, it was good because that meant Sawahata-kun would have probably gotten up as well. Two, it was a bad thing because it would be harder to find him in a crowd. Still, I persistently scanned all around me, trying to find a head of spiky blond hair or bright, mischievous eyes.

For the first few minutes I couldn't find anything. I ignored all the frightened looks I received from my angry gait and probably from the tiny amounts of reiryoku (spirit energy) I was putting off and put all my attention in trying to spot the fourth seat.

…_You're not really going to beat him until his eyeballs pop out, are you? I was just kidding about that, _Kuro told me nervously.

_Oh no, definitely not. What made you think I was going to do something like that?_

_Oh, that's a relief! I thought you really were going to—_

_I'm going to do _so _much worse._

After that remark I tuned out her shocked stuttering.

"Yo! Aria!"

_About damn time, _I thought, turning my head in the direction of the voice. Sure enough it was Sawahata-kun, looking as chipper as ever. He waved, with that same mischievous expression. I couldn't tell if that was normal or if he figured out what he did…

_I sure hope he doesn't see that evil gleam in your eyes… Or figure out that you're going to skin him alive and use his hide to hang on the wall._

_Actually I wasn't thinking of doing that, but thanks for the idea!_

_Oh crap…_

I tried my best to paste on a fake smile as he ran over and greeted me again.

"Wow, Aria, I can't believe you look so awake so early in the morning! And after your little, um, insomniac issue. Have you been taking those pills I've been giving you?" he asked cheerfully. I scrutinized him, trying to find a trace of guilt or some sort of awareness on his face.

"Speaking of which…" I answered, pulling the bottle from my pocket and holding it out to him, my palm completely outstretched. He peered at him curiously.

"What's up? Don't tell me you ate the whole bottle in just one night? Hate to break it to ya, but seriously, you'll kill yourself if you eat that many! Do you really have a death wish?"

I twitched, something I probably caught from the captain from him getting made at Rangiku-san for not doing her paperwork.

"That's rich, coming from you, Sawahata-kun, considering you're the ones who gave me the damned pills in the first place," I replied icily.

He raised an eyebrow, his expression shifting to confusion, but I couldn't see a flicker of guilt or something indicating that he knew about the unreliable medicine. "What's that supposed to mean, Aria?"

A small vein popped in the back of my head. My voice went low, and I tried to make it sound even deadlier. "It means that you were the one who gave me my supposed instrument of death."

Another confused look.

I lost control then.

"It means that these damned pills are _untested _and _unreliable_, Sawahata! You gave me _defective medicine!_ Are you really trying to kill me, huh, are you? You _do _know what happens if you eat medicine that's defective, right? _You die, that's what! _So it's a bit ironic how you tell me that _I'm _the one who's killing myself, when _you're _the one who gave me the pills in the first place! I could have _died, _has that gotten through yet?! Where the hell did you get these freaking things in the first place, dammit!? Because if you were stupid enough to take defective stuff then really, I really am going to have to smack you until you come to your senses! What the hell is wrong with you?!"

It just all poured out then. It was really unnatural for me to yell out a long, curse-ridden speech (if you call it that) like that one, but my temper often gets the better of me. Other Soul Reapers cast nervous glances at me from my loud tirade and hustled past us even faster.

Actually, this wasn't what I wanted to rant about. I wanted to yell at Sawahata-kun for making me face those forsaken memories, making them clearer more vivid than ever before so that the pain would be so much worse. But that would raise eyebrows so I had to say something else. I'm pretty sure that screaming at someone because they could have gotten you killed was appropriate.

Sawahata-kun glanced around, noticing the negative attention we were receiving. "Ssh, Aria, keep it down! There are people watching!"

"Do I look like I give a damn?!"

He grimaced but grabbed my wrist, dragging me off somewhere, which I obviously did not approve of.

"Hey, where are you taking me? Get off!"

_Aria, just keep quiet! _Kuro chastised me in my mind. _Honestly, if you make a scene you'll get into trouble! You can take it out on Sawahata when no one's watching! _

Another vein popped in my head, but deep down I knew she was right. So I kept my mouth shut as he dragged me around, but that didn't mean I liked it.

At last we stopped at an empty corridor. Sawahata-kun released my hand and I snatched it back like he was some kind of dangerous monster about to strike. Which, now that I think about it, was a bit ironic to me.

He turned around and faced me, the grimace still evident on his expression. "Okay, now that we're out of sight, you can rant at me all you want. What was it you wanted, again?"

I exhaled in a gush, and if anger was steam, you'd be seeing a lot of it. "I want you to take back these stupid tablets, Sawahata!" I hissed, again dropping the honorific I usually used for him. "They're more trouble than they're worth!"

I was watching for guilt, but it definitely caught me off guard to see surprise. "Wait, you want to what?"

"I said, take them back! I don't want these anymore!"

I shoved the bottle into his hands and stepped back. My anger was beginning to ebb away. "Thanks for giving them to me, but I really don't want them anymore. See you later." I started walking away, but something grabbed my wrist.

"Wait, are you sure? Did you even use these?" he asked. I turned around, about to tell him, but I stopped when I saw his expression. There was surprise there for sure, and maybe even a bit of guilt, but I also saw panic in those bright eyes.

_Why…? Why does he want me to keep those so badly?_

"Yes, I've already taken them once. And once is quite enough." I shook his hand off but made no effort to walk away. He would only stop me again so I decided I would stay until he stopped asking me all these questions.

"Are you sure you don't want to keep them longer?" he asked. "I mean, you only used them once. You've just got a bad first impression of them, that's all."

I shook my head. "To be honest, even if I did keep them, I wouldn't even use them. I've…had all I could handle."

How desperate I was to get rid of that bottle! When was the last time I talked this much? But he seemed to be just as desperate to make me keep it.

Sawahata-kun frowned but the bottle still lay in his hand. "I have a question," he stated. I shrugged, a gesture to continue.

"Who told you that these things were 'defective,' as you say? Since you took them initially you couldn't have known then."

"Captain Hitsugaya told me. He said that it wasn't marked with the Squad 4 insignia, so it hasn't been tested or approved by them."

If I hadn't been watching his face so intently I would have never caught the slight narrowing of his eyes at the mention of the captain's name. He exhaled in a puff and scratched his head. "Fine. But can you at least keep them on you, just in case you ever need them?"

I was reluctant, since I wanted him to take them back once and for all, but I could always throw them away later. I took the bottle gingerly and pocketed it. I had one more question before I would go. "By the way, Sawahata-kun, where did you get those anyway?"

He jumped a bit, again surprised by my words. "Huh? Oh, uh, I got them from a friend, that's all…"

"And where did he get it?"

"Um…I don't really know…From another person…?"

I frowned, not satisfied with his answer, but I didn't push it any further. By now my fury was entirely gone, and I was back to my none-confrontational self. "Well, that's all I needed. I'll…just be going back to work I guess…" I sauntered out of the hallway, this time completely intent on getting back. How long was I gone? The captain will start to wonder…

"Aria! Wait! What kind of work, anyway?"

I groaned internally. He would never stop, would he?

"Paperwork. I'm helping Captain with his work."

His eyebrows rose. "Paperwork? Isn't that the lieutenant's job?"

"Yes, but since she's…never around I fill in."

"Does he make you do it?"

"No. I do it voluntarily."

"Why?"

I sighed quietly. Something told me Sawahata-kun did not like Captain Hitsugaya that much. "It's…peaceful in there, I guess." He waited for more, but I had nothing else to say. It was just as simple as that. Peacefulness was something I treasured, because it meant no fearful stares, no one calling me a witch or a monster… It was a place where I could be myself without getting hurt.

"Wow, really?" he answered, again scratching his head. "I've never heard anyone in Squad 10 ever say that…I honestly don't know how you can stand to be alone with him."

I jumped, shocked. "What? Why's that?"

"He's just so…cold. A lot of people have been going around saying that sometimes one stare can turn you into a soul popsicle, not that he can't do that already. Don't get me wrong, he's the model captain, smart and strong, so everyone respects him a lot. It's just he hardly shows any emotion, so he's really hard to be near, let alone being alone with him."

Was that how everyone viewed Captain Hitsugaya? A glacier, cold and barren? From the way Sawahata-kun was talking about him, it was as though he viewed him more as a machine than as an actual person… Sure, he had an icy attitude and it always felt like he was pushing others away from him, but from my interaction with him I knew that he wasn't always like that.

"Sometimes there's always more beneath," I muttered under my breath. "Well, if you don't mind, Sawahata-kun, I need to be going."

For the third time I strode away, hoping that this would be the last time. And thankfully, it was fulfilled. The fourth seat did not seem to go after me. However, as I walked away, I heard something.

"Really…How does she stand to be alone with him? He's not so great…Just a walking, midget iceberg…"

I stopped and looked around, watching to see if anyone was watching. There were none. When I looked back Sawahata-kun was turned away from me, probably muttering other things about Captain Hitsugaya.

_Good, he's not looking, _I thought.

_Oh, don't tell me you're going to…_

_Yes, I am. _

I reached into my pocket and drew out the white bottle that I didn't manage to get rid of. I leered at the fourth seat's figure and pulled back my arm. And then…SWING! I shot my arm forward, chucking the bottle as hard as I could. It zoomed through the air as though it was launched by a slingshot and then CLUNK! It hit the Soul Reaper's head with a nice smacking sound. And since it was full…

"OW!!" he howled, clutching the back of his head. Trying to hold back a chuckle, I took off, wanting to get away as fast as possible.

_That's what you get for calling Captain a midget._

_I thought you gave up beating him up!_

_I did, but that didn't mean he wouldn't get hurt! _

**

* * *

**

***You know, this marks my 16th document uploaded. Before I uploaded it I totally panicked because it wouldn't load because I didn't know it had a 15 document limit. And then I figured, since those were already made into chapters, I might as well delete those. I wasn't sure if the story would still have all the chapters because I deleted them. Well, I just had to wait and see. Gee I hope it works...Then again it makes sense because I never figured out how authors who have so many stories with tons of chapters in them manage to sort out the document uploader. Looks like I learned something new. So please review and tell me if you found any mistakes in there... Or if you want to say something else.

**Me: Are you satisfied yet?**

**Aria: Yes.**

**Takumi: Well I'm not! You chucked a five pound bottle at my head, for Pete's sake!**

**Me: I would have done it too, for calling Toshiro a midget.**

**Aria: You're just lucky I didn't punch you full of holes with those thorned vines I use. Just wait until we tell him....**

**Toshiro: Tell me what?**

**Jomei: UH!! Nothing really, we were just chatting, really....**

**Aria and Me: He's so dead....**

**Actually I'm not sure the bottle was five pounds, but I guess it would be the equivalent to throwing a basketball or something at his head.... Or a basketball full of water. I really don't know.**


	17. Not a Dog

*****Hi everyone! I'm back! I'm so happy because now that it's summer I can update faster!!! Yay!!!! Back to the point, like I said in the last chappie this was originally part of the last one only it got too long I had to cut it into two parts. And then I got a bit carried away with this one....There goes my 5-page average..... This part in my eyes was a bit pointless, full of pointless conversations and events that don't relate too much to the story, but I do have a reason for typing this up. But it was just so fun to type! I was laughing at myself throughout a lot of it! **

**Thanks to my beta, .Butterfly. Love .Mikomi. Couldn't have done it without you! **

* * *

"Where have you been?" Captain Hitsugaya asked as I walked in, balancing a tea tray.

"Erm… I was… chatting with Sawahata-kun," I replied, focusing more on walking without spilling tea. It wasn't exactly a lie, since I _was_ talking to him—if you call shouting profanities and chucking a bottle at his head as "talking."

I set the tray down and proceeded to pour tea for the Captain and myself. I gave him his cup, but my hand froze when I saw the brush in his hand and the paper he was working on. My eyes glanced around and I finally realized the stacks of paper sitting around.

_What the…That was fast…_

Captain Hitsugaya caught my shifting eyes and cleared his throat. "You were gone longer than I thought and more paperwork came in, so…"

_Bloody thorns… Where in the world does all this paper come from? Does it just magically appear out of nowhere?! It's called going green, people!_

The Captain smirked for a brief second, as thought he knew what I was thinking. "A lower ranked officer delivers them here," he explained. "Actually, multiple officers, considering the amount."

_Wasting paper… _I thought grumpily as I returned to the couch. I picked up my own brush and grabbed a piece of paper, almost pressing it too hard against the sheet.

_Having tree hugger thoughts again? _Kuro teased.

_I told you before, the correct term is environmentalist! And I don't get why you're saying anything since you're a plant-type zanpakutou! Don't you care about the trees, too?_

_Of course. I was only teasing._

Getting crankier by the second, I set my mind on trying not to ruin the paper with ink blots. I hardly got two words down when I sensed someone coming.

_Who is…? Oh, no…_

Of all the people that were coming here, it had to be him… He's probably going to waste me for hurling that bottle at his head… It couldn't have hurt that much, could it?

_What do you mean, you're going to get wasted? I'm still here! You can waste him instead!_

_Thanks, but I think I'll pass. _

Even the Captain noticed. "Why is the fourth seat coming…?"

I ran through my options quickly in my head: I could jump out the window; shunpo past him the second the door opened; mask my reiatsu and hide behind Captain Hitsugaya's desk… I gulped when I realized I was out of time as his presence appeared behind the door.

The slider door abruptly opened with a loud clack and—obviously—Sawahata-kun stood there, in all his glory. His eyes flickered to me and I thought I saw him twitch slightly. In response, I tried to give the most impish grin I could muster, although I suspected that it turned out more sheepish than impish. A small vein popped in his head but he didn't confront me, instead turning his attention to the Captain.

"Captain Hitsugaya, sir," he said with a bow. The Captain eyed him with his usual icy look.

"It's called knocking, Sawahata. Remember your rank," he replied nonchalantly.

"Yes, sir."

"What is it that you've come here for?"

"I want to see if you'll dismiss the third seat from paperwork, sir."

One of Captain Hitsugaya's eyebrows arched while both of mine shot up. "And why, may I ask?"

"I just thought that she's been working hard sir, so I thought she could take a break. She's been working twenty-four/seven and I've hardly seen her that much at all."

Purple lines appeared on my head as I contemplated that. _He's probably going to take me somewhere and beat me up for the bottle… Oh, joy…_

Our superior looked at me for a few seconds and turned back toward the awaiting fourth seat. "I suppose that can be arranged, though we'll have to ask her. Miyamoto-san?" he called.

"Y-yes, sir?"

"Do you need a break?"

A simple question, but it meant so much more. Specifically, a very bad pummeling in the future.

_Just refuse. He's not going to push you, _Kuro suggested.

_I… doubt that. If he's willing to let me sleep on his bed, something tells me he might force me to take a break. And I _do_ suppose I could use it. I don't want to be surrounded by all this wasted paper._

_So that's your reason? He probably won't beat you up, anyway. Not over a bottle._

_I sure hope so…_

But I was still unsure. Once more I would leave my decision up to the Captain.

"I guess I could… If it's okay with the Captain…" I answered with uncertainty.

He shrugged and said, "Go ahead. You could use it anyway."

"Uh, sure, but…"

"You're not like Matsumoto, always running off when you're not supposed to. You're almost the exact opposite; you work too hard. Just go. I'll be fine."

I gave a small nod of affirmation, but out of nowhere Sawahata-kun's hand shot out and grabbed my wrist—for the third time that day, nonetheless.

"Sweet," he said. "We'll be going then. Excuse us, Captain." And then he suddenly just ran for the door, jerking me along very sharply.

"AH!" I squeaked at the sudden movement. A short second right before we were completely out the door I caught Captain Hitsugaya looking rather stunned but nevertheless amused.

Sawahata-kun was the one running, jerking me along since I was constantly stumbling. When he finally stopped we were outside the barracks. I snatched my arm back and leaned over to catch my breath.

"What's with you? You nearly pulled my arm off, doing that!" I said between breaths. One of his eyebrows was raised as he assessed me.

"Wow… You're really out of shape, Aria. We only ran a few yards."

"You think I don't know that already? And I would have done better if you weren't yanking me around like that; I was tripping every two seconds!"

He chuckled heartily. "Yeah, I noticed. Good thing you weren't wearing shoes with laces, or you'd have a _really _hard time."

"…Laces?"

"Oh, right; you've never been to the world of the living, have you? Yeah, they have these shoes with strings to make them tighter, but sometimes they get untied so their owners trip over them."

I shuddered at the thought. How do they walk in those? If I ever went to the world of the living I would never, ever get a pair of shoes like that.

"Anyway," I cleared my throat, "what do you want with me?"

Sawahata-kun shrugged. "Captain Hitsugaya was right; you do need a break from paperwork. I mean, I haven't seen you that much at all the past couple of days, but during the times I have you've always been in there. Don't you have any friends to hang out with?"

My heart gave a little ache and my shoulders slumped as I looked down at the ground. "No, not really."

I could sense the fourth seat's surprise. "Really? Why?"

"I don't think anyone likes me that much."

"Have you even _talked _to anyone yet?"

"…Not really."

"Then how do you know they don't like you?"

"There are a bunch of new recruits from my Academy class, and they… didn't like me. I wouldn't be surprised if they spread stories about me around." I wondered if Sawahata-kun himself had heard those stories.

He didn't say anything after that and I looked up to see him pondering something. He shrugged again and grinned. "Well, we're going to change that! I took you out here so that we could go do something fun. Whaddaya say?"

I looked at him skeptically. Hanging around Rangiku-san had altered my definition of "fun."

"We're not going to drink, are we? Because I'm underage."

"Really? How old are you?"

"Um…Younger than you…?"

"That's not underage."

"You know what I mean!"

"Okay, okay! No reason to get testy. And no, we're not going to drink. Because—believe it or not—I'm pretty sure I'm underage, too. We're just going to go around Seireitei and look around. Sound good?"

I shrugged. "Fine."

"Oh, and by the way, why do you have your sword on you?"

I gave him a lame look. "So I can whack you upside the head if you even get close to a bar."

He took a look at my expression and frowned. "You serious?" My face didn't look like I was joking. I nodded, but I couldn't hold back a small smirk. He sighed in relief.

"Speaking of whacking, you've got one hell of an arm there, slinging that bottle at my head. You gave me a huge bruise, Aria!" Sawahata-kun reached up and felt the back of his head, wincing.

"Are you sure I did that?"

"Well, duh! It was the same bottle as before!"

"How do you know I didn't just drop it and someone accidentally kicked it at your head?"

"Sure, that's exactly what happened," he replied sarcastically. "Either way, I'm still keeping that bottle so I don't get hurt even more. Well, let's get going then. Time for some fun, Aria!" He walked off and I followed.

"Oh, and by the way, I wasn't joking about the whacking and the bar thing."

"Ah, dang…"

***

Sawahata-kun was right; Seireitei was an enjoyable place to spend time in. They had so many things that I'd never seen or even heard of in Rukongai. It was a busy place with Soul Reapers going from place to place. There were clothing shops, candy shops, and even my favorite, flower shops. There was one where they had such a huge selection of flowers that the fourth seat had to drag me away in order to move on. (I wasn't too happy about it, either.) They even had something I had never even thought existed before: ice cream.

"What's… ice-cream?" I asked when Sawahata-kun mentioned it. He gave me an incredulous look.

"Are you serious? You really don't know?"

I turned pink and retorted, "I grew up in the 60th district, Sawahata-kun. I've never heard of it because we never had it."

"Right, sorry. I didn't know. You should try it then." He went over to a vendor and came back with two cones in his hands. One had a cream sphere and the other had a green one with brown chunks in it.

"Here," he said, giving me the cone with the cream sphere. "Since this is your first time tasting ice-cream, I think it's a good idea to start off light. How does vanilla sound?"

"Vanilla…" I muttered to myself. Watching the boy give the green cone a lick, I tried mine. It was really good!

"Mmm… yum." I gave a few more licks and even bit into it. It was so cold! When I looked up at Sawahata-kun to thank him, I nearly choked on my ice cream because on his face was a green mustache.

"Nice mustache, boy. Though I still think it's too early for you to grow facial hair. Especially when it's green," I pointed out. Instead of wiping it away with a napkin he simply licked it all away.

"No dissing the 'stache," he remarked. I rolled my eyes and continued to enjoy my own ice-cream. When I was all done I pestered the fourth seat for all the details about it until he was twitching from irritation.

The day passed by quicker than I thought. When I looked at a clock in a clock store, I noticed with horror that it was already three. I had been gone for at least four hours!

"Holy…! Uh, Sawahata-kun, I think I need to go back now…" I announced. He looked at the clock as well and shrugged.

"Eh. I think it's okay. I doubt that the Captain will be mad just because you took a day off."

A day?! How long did he intend to keep me around?

"B-but… He gets really angry at the lieutenant when she skips out on paperwork for just an hour or two…" I shuddered at what the Captain's reaction will be when I go back.

"That's because she hardly does any paperwork anyway, Aria. Relax, for goodness sake. You've filled out enough forms to get your share of break time."

"But—"

"No buts! We're going!"

He grabbed my sleeve and began tugging me along _again. _I struggled to break free indignantly.

"Wah! Lemme go! I'm not just some wagon to be pulled around!" I cried, waving my free arm in protestation.

"No can do. We've still have a lot of things left to do!"

"I swear, if I get killed when I get back, I will come back and haunt you until the day you die yourself, Sawahata-kun," I threatened.

He snorted. "Sure you will."

Unfortunately he won that battle and I was unable to return. However, the worry was shoved into the back of my mind as he took me to different places in Seireitei. Who knew it was such a huge place? There were cafés and bookshops and so much more.

There was only one instance when I had to get severe. We had stopped outside a smoothie shop after going in and buying some. Sawahata-kun had asked me to wait outside while he went to get something. I tried to go with him but he insisted on me staying put. I did as he told, but once he was gone I quietly flash stepped after him, hoping not to run into anything. Sure enough, Sawahata-kun was standing close to a bar, and he looked around before inching closer and closer. As silently as possible I went up behind him and WHACK! I used Kurobararyu and smacked him sharply in the head. It was probably where that bruise I gave him earlier was because suddenly he clutched the area, howling with pain. He spun around, his eyes wide and on the verge of tearing up. I grinned evilly. "Aha. Gotcha," I said, eyeing him. A sweat drop appeared on his head.

"Er, hiya, Aria. Didn't I tell you to stay over there?" he replied nervously. My sword was still in its sheath and I gently tapped my right palm with the end.

"I did, but I didn't really see a reason to stay, since I knew you weren't _sneaking off,_" I emphasized. He gulped.

"What do you mean, sneaking off? I totally was _not _sneaking off! I wasn't going into the bar to have a quick drink or anything! Why would you say something like that?"

I grinned even wider. "I didn't."

The sweat drop on Sawahata-kun's head got even bigger.

"Didn't you tell me you were probably under aged?"

The sweat drop was probably the size of Mount. Fuji by now and in turn I grabbed his shihakusho and started jerking him around. Ah, sweet revenge!

"Oh! Do that again, and I will personally tell Captain Hitsugaya that you've been drinking with the lieutenant," I threatened in a sweet voice. The fourth seat looked horrified and stuttered never to do it again while I was around. And he kept that promise. I made sure of it.

I panicked again when I noticed the sun beginning to set, but once more my companion reassured me that the Captain was not going to severely punish me. To take my mind off of it, he led me to a restaurant and ordered us some food. I tried to pay for my own, but he wouldn't allow it.

"So, Aria," he said, handing me my food. I accepted in silence and started poking it with my chopsticks.

"What's up? Not hungry?" he asked, sounding concerned.

"No," I responded, my face leering at my plate. "I still can't believe you wouldn't let me pay, even though you bought all those other things… Hmph."

He laughed. "Oh, don't worry about it. I've been saving up for a day like this." He used his own chopsticks and popped some food into his mouth. "Now eat, before I have to force it down your throat myself."

"I'd like to see you try," I muttered in a low tone. Nevertheless, I poked my food and ate it, albeit grumpily.

"So Aria," Sawahata-kun repeated after swallowing. I glanced up. "Since we're friends and all… Why don't we take this chance to get to know each other?"

I raised an eyebrow. "Huh?"

"You know, friends should know things about each other. Heck I don't even know your favorite color. It's not going to work like that, you know?"

He waited for me to speak but I said nothing, only putting more food in my mouth. He sighed and continued to eat in silence. And while he was doing that, I was contemplating something.

Friends. He said we were _friends. _A person who had not met me at the Academy and had not seen how others treated me. A person who did not pity me. He called us friends.

Sure, Rangiku-san was my friend for sure. In a way she was like a mother to me; and while Captain Hitsugaya said nothing concerning the matter, from the way he treated me I considered him an important person to me.

Though, the thing was that both of them had seen what it was like for me at the Academy. I wasn't entirely sure of their reasons, but it was possible that it was out of pity that they took me in and gave me "special treatment." But Sawahata-kun had never seen me like that before. He called me his friend just from seeing me here, in the Gotei 13, a place where I could feel free of those fearful glances and maybe even be myself. And that was what was so special.

"Red," I murmured.

"What?"

"I said red. Red is my favorite color."

"Oh." He blinked, obviously not expecting me to answer. "Well, my favorite color is gold."

"Red is my favorite, along with pink, white, yellow, orange and any other color of flowers," and on it went.

I lost track of time once again as I was chatting with the fourth seat. I don't know, but I just felt comfortable there, chatting with him, like I was _normal _and not some strange girl with destructive powers. Something about it was familiar... Sawahata-kun… He reminded me of…

"Aria? Tell me a bit about your Rukongai days," he asked. I jumped out of my ponderings and processed his question, shifting tensely in my seat. So far he hadn't asked me anything too personal yet, so I was put on the spot. What was I supposed to say? That I had a terrible temper and went out on such a flying rage that I killed my guardians?

"What do you want to know?" I answered evasively.

"You know, your family and what it was like. I grew up in the 10th district and I was never really the adventurous type so it's tough for me to think what it was like in the 60th."

By now we had finished the meal, so I didn't have anything to delay my reply. Under the table I wrung my hands, searching for something to say without giving away too much. And most of all, bringing back that old pain.

"I lived with my aunt and uncle," I whispered. I hesitated, but went on. "And… my sister."

"Huh. I lived with just my dad. Why were you with your aunt and uncle?"

"My parents had died when I was very young so we were sent there. My uncle was my dad's brother."

"Okay then… What was your sister's name, then?"

I closed my eyes, glad that my head was bowed and he could not see my face drawn in pain. I took a deep breath and exhaled. "H… Hotaru…" I tried to use all the force of my mind to keep from thinking about said person.

"That's a pretty name. Weird, her name is Japanese but yours is English. Why is that?"

"…I heard a story from my aunt that my mother liked to sing so she decided to name me after a kind of song. I heard that she's always liked arias because they were beautiful but sad at the same time, at least some of them." What a fitting name… A sad, lilting melody, quiet in the background. Never fading away, but never substantial enough…

"Really? My name means 'spread light,' and my mom named me that just because she wanted me to spread happiness or something like that… Pshaw."

"Sawahata-kun? Why is it that you only lived with your dad anyway?" I launched a question, hoping for something to drive him away from the subject. Thankfully that did the trick, and the boy began a story about his own past. It wasn't something he had explained but I really was grasping for straws here. I sighed internally with relief.

_Your heart… It's wavering again, _Kurobararyu whispered.

_Sorry… It's just so hard…._

_I know, Aria, I know… I just hope it'll go away soon._

After awhile I noticed the blackening sky and I stood up. "Sawahata-kun. I really appreciate you bringing me out like this; I don't know how to ever repay you. But I really have to get back now. I'm getting a bit tired."

He stood up as well, rolling his shoulders. "Yeah, I guess you're right. Captain would definitely get mad if you get back past nighttime."

He paid the bill (much to my chagrin) and we walked back together in the cool night air.

_I can't train with Captain Hitsugaya tonight…_ I thought with disappointment, staring at the sky.

_It's just one night. You can make it up tomorrow,_ my sword reassured.

***

I took a deep breath as I stood outside the office door, Sawahata-kun behind me.

"Oh, relax. He won't kill you," he ensured.

"Says you," I mumbled. I reached for the handle but I just couldn't bring myself to pull.

"Oh, for the love of… I can't believe you're the third seat," the fourth seat scoffed. He gripped the handle himself and thrust it open with another clack, making me jump.

When I peered inside, it hadn't changed much. There was still some paper, only a lot less than there was this morning. Captain Hitsugaya was, as usual, behind the desk. At the sound of the loud clatter, he looked up with a raised eyebrow, as though he already knew it was us.

"You're late, Miyamoto-san," he admonished. I cringed but there was no hint of anger in his voice. It was just the same tone as when I was usually around him.

"My gravest apologies, Captain. I lost track of time…"

"Suck-up," the fourth seat whispered to me.

"Zip it," I retorted quietly. "You're the one who got me into this. Now get me out of it."

"Whatever. Sorry, Cap'n!" He called. I winced at his informality but he continued. "We were just having lots of fun. Don't blame Aria for this. The girl really needs to get out sometimes."

That comment made me want to stomp on his foot, but I resisted. My eyes widened as our superior's shoulders shrugged.

"She wasn't even in trouble in the first place. You work too hard, Miyamoto-san." Exhaling in relief, I stepped into the room and quickly sat on the couch, mentally exhausted. "You're dismissed, Sawahata."

He bowed low and straightened. "Nice getting to know ya, Aria. Don't expect this to be your last time spending the day with me," he parted before leaving the room. I sat there, slightly in shock.

"Bye…" I uttered under my breath. "Nice getting to know you, too."

**

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**

Me: HOW COULD YOU NOT KNOW WHAT ICE CREAM IS, WOMAN??? WHAT KIND OF DEMON HAS DEMENTED YOU??  
Aria: STOP SHOUTING!!! DIDN'T YOU HEAR ME??? I GREW UP IN A PLACE WHERE THEY DIDN'T HAVE ICE CREAM, DARN IT!!! RELAX!!  
Me: THAT'S NO EXCUSE FOR NOT KNOWING ABOUT THE CREAMY GOODNESS!!!! Oh, and by the way, why is it that you never admit being a tree hugger or a masochist or anything?  
Aria: THAT CORRECT TERM IS ENVIRONMENTALIST!!! AND I AM NOT A MASOCHIST!!!! GRR!!! (Wow, she changed the subject fast...)  
Me: THEY'RE THE SAME THING!!! (Why are we shouting?)  
Aria: NO THEY'RE NOT!!!  
Me: WHATEVER!!!! THEY ARE TO ME!!!

Me: Well now that that's all done.....I really enjoyed writing this chapter because--  
Jomei: *jumps out and strikes a pose* Because I looked so sexy in it!!!  
Me: *looks at him for a moment and then breaks down* BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! WHAT THE HECK WAS THAT?!?!?! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!  
Jomei: Okay, now that's just insulting.  
Me: *stops laughing* Okay, okay, I'm okay now. *wipes away tear* Anyway, I liked writing this because *giggle* Jomei makes the *snicker* funniest comments *chuckle* EVER! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!  
Jomei: ......Okay you can stop now...  
Aria: Wow....I've never seen her laugh this much since she watched the video about the guy walking while strapped to a rubber band tied to the wall and then it snapped...Only she laughed harder at that.  
Jomei: Yeah, that _was _really funny.  
Me: *still having a laughing seizure*  
Jomei: Should we do something? It isn't natural for her to laugh this long just because I made a funny comment.  
Aria: Naw, she'll snap out of it eventually. So I'll do the honors today. Readers, please review! Suggestions? Constructive critisism? Or just compliments? Press the green button, everyone!

Hmm...I wonder if anyone noticed how during the entire chapter of that nightmare Aria had that I never once mentioned her sister's name. And now I'm betting that some people are going to go back to check......Wow that was a long author note.....


	18. Something Different

*****Hi hi, everyone! I've updated yet again! Yay! This actually turned out to be a lot fewer words than I thought...only about 3600? Meh. I blame the font. I'm hoping you guys will like this chapter, since...well, I can't say anything now that won't spoil it. I apologize if this seems a bit rushed; I wasn't in a hurry or anything, it's just that I'm really bad at coming up with little filler details. Ironic, I can do filler chappies but not the little details in between? Eh.....**

**On a random note: Anyone read the latest Bleach chapter? I have one thing to say: FINALLY!!! AIZEN IS GOING DOWN!!!! Oh, and Tranformers 2 is AWESOME!!!! BEST MOVIE EVER!!!!**

**For personal reference: This chapter was put up 7/10/09.**

* * *

Life went on in the Seireitei.

Days turned to weeks as I watched time fly by. Nothing of special coincidence happened. I kept helping Captain Hitsugaya with his paperwork, he did his share, and every now and then Sawahata-kun would take me out again (though I never again allowed him to have me out for an entire day). Sleep, get up, and the cycle would begin all over again.

The reconstruction of my room was taking a bit long, but frankly I didn't mind at all. Every night my nightmares would fade and fade and I would see even less of them, until now they were barely flickers, even though I still didn't know why.

_Oh really? I thought it was because you just liked seeing your precious captain shirtless, _Kuro teased.

_Sh-shut up! _

And as usual, Kurobararyu was _really _getting on my nerves.

My training was going along fairly well too. I was now able to pull most of my reiryoku in, though there were still some spills. Captain Hitsugaya was surprisingly a patient teacher and simply stood by, commenting every now and then on my prowess and offering advice. I worked as hard as I could because I didn't want to feel incompetent next to him. After all, he was a captain and obviously had no trouble controlling his reiatsu.

As the days passed, however, I began to get a strange feeling. It was monotonous and for some reason my body would begin to feel somewhat heavy as I went about my daily routine. Sometimes, I would even feel irritated at the sameness of it all and I just wanted to groan out loud. And one day I figured it out.

I was bored.

Bored! Of all the things I was feeling! I should be feeling grateful for my pleasant, non-confrontational life but… I longed to go outside and breathe in the fragrant air, to smell the flowers and heck even climb a tree or two.

It got so bad that one day, for the first time, I actually slacked off from doing paperwork. There was just that moment where I just couldn't write on the same white paper over and over again anymore. So what did I do? I found a piece of scratch paper and began doodling all over it.

_I'll just finish this and get straight back to work! _I thought dutifully.

But as much as I kept reminding myself my hand kept on lingering over the page.

_Just…one… more… doodle! _

I looked over the page and examined my work. In the very center of the page I drew two things: a bunny and a panda. They were really simple so they weren't my greatest drawings. That was when my mind started to wander. In the corner I had written my name and then a ways down I drew a chibi-tized version of my captain's head. And then in another corner I drew…a sheep…on the body of a Cupid…with a giant hammer…?

"Having fun, are we?" a voice said, very close to my ear.

"AHHH!!" I shrieked. I was so startled that I dropped my brush and jumped off the couch, landing my behind…

"Captain!" I said while on the ground, sheepish. Apparently he was leaning right over my shoulder. "Captain! Were you watching me? I wasn't slacking off or anything, really! I wasn't doodling all over a piece of paper, no way!" As I was saying this I snatched the scribble page and tore it up into little pieces.

Captain Hitsugaya raised an eyebrow at me. "Right," he replied sarcastically. "You know, if you're bored, you just had to say so."

"Bored? What, me? No way!"

"…It's not that hard to tell you're bored, Miyamoto-san. And I figured as much. You've been here, what, months now? And every day you've been working on paperwork nonstop. Even if I didn't look at your face I can just tell."

My head drooped, ashamed, and I poked the floor.

"So…what does Captain do besides paperwork…?" I asked shyly.

"I have to make sure that squad members are in line, I have to go to captain meetings, making sure that the squad is running properly, assign missions and most of all," he twitched at this, "I have to go around scouting for Matsumoto, who is most likely drunk and hung over in some ditch God-knows-where!" A vein had popped on his head. "The thing is, I don't spend _all _my time filling out forms, Miyamoto-san. I do have other things to do. Don't you have any hobbies…any friends beside Sawahata to spend with…?"

He was second person to ask. Now that it had been brought up again I began to think about my social life here. I wasn't sure if my former classmates weren't spreading rumors anymore (though I wasn't even sure that they were spreading them in the first place) so making friends was a bit difficult for me.

_I'm sure that they've stopped now. It's been months since the graduation and your transfer. Old class gossip is so yesterday, _Kuro pointed out, though in a very strange way…

…_I still have to be careful…_

But I didn't have an excuse for not having any hobbies. Come to think of it, I really wanted to something else with my hands…When I was little I was usually the one that fixed everything around the house and I even handmade some things on my own as well.

_Haha, Aria is just a hermit with no hobbies! _Kuro snickered in my head.

_How long are you going to keep doing this to me? _

I stood up from my position on the floor and dusted myself off, still pondering.

"Well, Miyamoto-san, do you have hobbies you can do?"

My mind wandered at his question and suddenly I remembered the first morning after I spent a night with the captain. I thought about how I went into the garden and I found it a bit of a tangled mess.

At those thoughts my hands itched, aching for something to handle. Toiling the soft earth, snipping wild vines….I knew at that moment what I wanted to do.

With the captain in front of me, I leaned over to the left and pointed shyly toward the window. He turned around and saw the garden that I was gesturing at.

"Oh. You like to garden? Not surprised…You do have a plant-type zanpakuto after all," he mused. He took a look at me, still standing there. "Well? What are you waiting for? Go already, if you want to!"

I jumped but started to scamper out the door. Right before I left, however, I looked back and smiled brightly at my captain.

"Thank you very much, Captain Hitsugaya," I thanked graciously. He seemed a little stunned at my outburst, but waved his hand, gesturing for me to go.

I trotted away, almost skipping, eager to actually be doing something with my hands that I fully enjoyed.

_Did I imagine it, or did I see him smile right before I left? _I wondered.

* * *

After his third seat happily left the room, Toshiro returned to his own work, not being the type who liked to garden himself. Unsuccessfully he tried to wipe away that small smile on his face that came when Aria had thanked him. He gave up after a while, simply resorting to letting it fade on its own.

_It's nice to know that she's happy, _he thought.

_Through your efforts, boy, _a powerful voice echoed within him.

_I suppose so. _

_I have been pondering this for quite some time now…What is it that drives you to help the girl? She has not done anything for you so why do you help her?_

…_It's not what she has done, it's what she hasn't, _the captain replied. _Even though I still don't know what caused her be so…sad, I know that she's the kind of girl who doesn't deserve it. Miyamoto-san...is the kind of girl who deserves to live a happy life. _

_Is that the only reason? I think you see a bit of yourself in the youngling. _

_Oh? Like what?_

_Perhaps it's the fact that she does not share her pain with others, _Hyorinmaru pondered. _No matter how much she suffers she refuses to share those experiences with those around her. Maybe you are helping her also because you don't want her to be like you. You were once like that, weren't you, boy?_

_I…guess so. _

Now that he thought about it, Aria really was as his sword had described. Toshiro still knew very little about his subordinate, and her file did not contain much about her history. Try as he could she would not reveal one bit about her past, as though she had something to hide.

_Or if she doesn't want to remember past miseries…_

He sat back in his chair and closed his eyes, his mind wandered to the past. He could still remember a time when he too was like that, when he was simply a wall of ice that never let anything in, or out…

In the middle of his musings he felt something enter the room. Opening his eyes he saw a Hell Butterfly flutter in. Sticking out a finger it landed daintily.

"There will be a captain's meeting in fifteen minutes," he uttered softly. "All captains are suggested to attend. That will be all."

Its job finished the black butterfly flapped its wings and began to return to wherever it came from. Sighing Toshiro slipped out of the comfort of his chair sauntered out the door.

***

The sharp banging of the Head Captain's cane against the floor resounded throughout the entire room.

"This captains' meeting has officially begun," the elder's deep voice declared. "Where is Captain Ukitake?"

"He was feeling a bit under the weather so he couldn't join us," Captain Kyoraku explained, fingering his hat.

"I see. Then we shall immediately begin discussing the current affairs of the Gotei 13." And thus it began.

Toushirou did not listen the whole time. In his mind he was thinking about ways that might keep his third seat away from doing paperwork 24/7. Occasionally he would listen in on the discussion but he would become disinterested and continue his deliberations again.

"Furthermore, there is one last issue that I would like to address," the wise captain boomed after some time. "Lately, there has been a large amount of Hollow activity in the world of the living and a team of at least fifteen will need to be sent in order to deal with the problem."

_A perfect opportunity, _Toushirou thought. He knew that Aria had never been to the world of the living before and this would be a good training exercise for all those that he would choose to go on the mission.

"Head Captain Yamamoto, I will head the mission, if you deem fit," the tenth captain volunteered, stepping forward.

Yamamoto looked at the boy and nodded. "Very well. Captain Hitsugaya of Squad 10 will head the mission to exterminate the rogue Hollows. Send a report on who you are bringing before you go. This captains' meeting is hereby adjourned!" The elder hit the floor twice with his ancient cane.

As the group of elite Soul Reapers filed out the room, Captain Kyoraku started to walk alongside the tenth.

"So, Captain Hitsugaya, what made you take the troublesome job of taking out the Hollows?" he asked in that casual manner of his.

The addressed shrugged. "It's about time I had some of my subordinates do something for a change. If I go too long without giving them work, Matsumoto's slacking-off will infect everyone."

"Ah, yes, Lieutenant Matsumoto does have a funny way of doing things," the eighth captain replied, amused. "But are you sure you're not doing it specifically for that cute little third seat of yours? Aria-chan, was it?"

Toushirou's eyes widened slightly, but he shouldn't have been surprised. "What makes you say that, Captain Kyoraku?"

"Ah well lately I've been feeling some reiatsu fluctuations where the Squad 10 barracks are, and I recognize it as Aria-chan's. My guess is that she's been training on trying to control that monstrous energy of hers. You just took the chance to really put her to the test, am I right?"

The young captain did not reply to the keen observation. Instead he rounded the corner and disappeared, returning to his own barracks. Adjusting his hat again the older captain smiled as he ambled back to his division.

"My, my, things are getting interesting over in Squad 10, aren't they?" he remarked.

* * *

"A mission?" I asked, peering at the sheet Captain Hitsugaya handed me.

"That's right," he answered. "There's some Hollow activity over there and I volunteered to take care of it. It shouldn't be that hard, in fact it could even be considered a training exercise for the people going. Matsumoto and I are also going, but we're just there to monitor everything. Just fill out that sheet and give it to me. We'll be leaving tomorrow and staying there for two or three days, so rest up." He turned away and left.

_Finally! I get a chance to finally do something! _Kuro burst, exhilarated.

_They're just Hollows. I don't think I'll have to release you to take care of them, _I contradicted.

_Aahhh, that's too bad. _

I didn't say anything back. I continued to listlessly read the sheet.

_What's wrong? I thought you were bored out of your mind here. Shouldn't you be excited for this? It will be your first time in the world of the living, not one of those simulations at the Academy. _

_Those Hollows…I'll have to fight them, won't I?_

_Well of course! How else will you—oh. _

Kurobararyu finally understood what I was getting at. In order to get rid of the Hollows I would have draw my sword and fight them.

Could I do it? My control in my powers did not seem to have improved much…

_You'll be fine. You know what I think? I think Captain Hitsugaya took this mission to give you a chance to use your training in the field, _Kuro suggested.

_Huh? I doubt it. All this work just for me? _

_Well, it is a training exercise for other subordinates too, but he probably had you in mind at the time. And don't worry, you'll be fine! You won't go out of control or anything! I don't even think you'll need to take off your hair ribbons! You've been training hard, Aria. I believe in you!_

…_You know that sounds really corny, right? _Despite my teasing my uncertainty was beginning to wear off and I was started to get excited. I owed my thanks to Kuro…

_Ah! How could you say that? I say something nice for a change and you totally brush it off! How mean! _Kuro turned her head dramatically, but I knew that she wasn't mad. _Oh, and you're welcome. _

I smiled to myself as I stashed the form into my pocket. "This'll be fun…"

***

_(The following day)_

A group of Soul Reapers were huddled in front of the enormous Senkaimon. I admit, I was slightly intimidated by the large, towering gates.

"Aahhh!" Rangiku-san stretched, her arms reaching toward the sky. "Finally! A mission! I was so bored hanging around the barracks all the time!"

"If you were so bored, then why didn't you come help me with paperwork, Matsumoto?" Captain Hitsugaya suggested in a low tone. Rangiku-san ignored him and kept chatting.

"I wonder if we'll be able to go shopping! Oh, I could just imagine all the things I could buy for Ri-chan!" She eyed as if I was some kind of experiment. I backed away a little.

"Stop daydreaming and focus, Matsumoto!" the captain snapped. He huffed. "I still can't believe she's my lieutenant…"

Thankfully Rangiku-san turned her attention elsewhere and I was left to my own devices. In truth, I was beginning to feel a bit nervous about the mission. I couldn't understand why, since the majority of humans couldn't see Soul Reapers and I had fought Hollows before. Well, to be more exact, they were virtual Hollows so they couldn't really hurt me…

_Real Hollows…And I don't even know what's in the world of the living…I don't remember anything from when I was a human…What if something happens and I'm not prepared? Oh, I hope I don't trip too often…_

"YO!" a voice shattered my thoughts. A hand slapped my shoulder and I must have jumped at least three feet into the air.

"Whoops, sorry 'bout that," Sawahata-kun chuckled as I tried to catch my breath after the startling greeting. "Didn't mean to scare yout. I thought you were paying attention."

"Oh. Hi, Sawahata-kun," I greeted back.

"Are ya excited for the mission?" he asked with a grin, elbowing me. "I'm guessing this is your first time to the other side, huh? Don't worry; I'll watch your back! Your knight in shining armor is here!"

"Like I need you to protect me," I snorted. "I don't need a shining knight in armor or whatever it was you said. I can take care of myself." _At least I hope so, _I added mentally.

"By the way…Sawahata-kun? What's the world of the living like?" I wanted to glean all the info so I could be prepared.

"Well, the humans there look just like us…except without the wacky hair tones," he started, eyeing my "wacky hair." I ignored that part. "A lot of humans can't see us though, so you don't have to worry. They live in these things called houses, and they look a lot different from the buildings in Rukongai. Oh, and you'll like this part. They have all sorts of flowers there and trees are everywhere! Those things are huge! The forests are awesome, lots of tall trees and different flowers growing everywhere. You'll probably like it there."

I nodded, slightly reassured. "Okay, that doesn't sound so bad." _I just hope I don't destroy anything while I'm there…._

_Oh, quit thinking like that! _Kuro snapped. _You're getting on my nerves! You'll be just fine!_

I heard someone shouting and a murmur ran through the crowd. Hell Butterflies came flapping in and I heard another shout.

"Looks like it's time," Sawahata-kun mumbled.

I took this opportunity to quickly scan the crowd, trying to memorize as many faces as possible. Everyone was taller than me, so it wasn't that easy to see past some people. And then something caught my eye. I took a closer look and my eyes widened in horror when I realized it was one of my former classmates, the one that had whispering behind my back on the day Captain Hitsugaya had come to the Academy. Feeling me stare, the Soul Reaper looked in my direction and I tried not to cringe when I saw her eyes widen when she spotted me. She tore her gaze from mine and began whispering into her neighbor's ear, another person I recognized, and her eyes widened as well.

I snapped my head around, my face getting hot. _Shoot, _I thought. _How am I supposed to fight in front of those two? _I hoped fervently that there weren't too many other former classmates in this group. I couldn't hope for much though; it was quite a large group and the class I "graduated" from was also very large. The best I could hope for was for there to be only two or three more people in this crowd that I knew.

"Hey, are you okay?" the fourth seat asked, sounding concerned. I nodded meekly, not able to speak due to the paranoia that I thought the one I recognized could hear me. I could tell he wasn't satisfied with my answer but turned away just in time for the gates to open.

Despite my cowardice I craned my neck eagerly to watch the gates open. I was amazed that these huge, incredibly heavy doors could actually budge. As the gates opened, I saw a bright, light blue light getting bigger and bigger as the gateway parted.

"There's the portal," Sawahata-kun explained in a low tone. "With the Hell Butterflies we can get to the world of the living without running into any trouble."

"Trouble?"

"Oh, that's another story, and it won't happen to us. Don't worry about it, I'll tell you some other time."

"I'll hold you to that."

The gates had finally fully parted, the dimensional portal shining brightly before us. The captain turned toward us and shouted only two words.

"Let's move!"

He ran and jumped into the portal, with Rangiku-san swiftly following. The rest of us quickly began to enter the portal as well, keen on not getting left behind.

"Let's go!" Sawahata-kun cried and ran straight into the light.

I took a deep breath and started running, and despite the circumstances I found myself in, I smiled with enthusiasm as I slipped into the brightness.

**

* * *

***Ack.....So....many....POV changes.....*dies* Sorry for the part with Toshiro being so short. I have absolutely no clue what they talk about at those captain meetings when Soul Society is not threatened one way or the other. **

**Me: Finally!!!! Wee!!!!**

**Toshiro: What's she so excited about?**

**Aria: One, she saw the new Transformers movie and now it's her favorite; two, she's hyper over chapter 365 of Bleach and she's impatiently waiting for the next one; and three she's just having one of those writing splurges again and she's eager to start writing again.**

**Toshiro: Oh.....Weird...One second she's gone all lazy and sitting like lump on the couch and then the next she's typing like crazy on the computer. Women....**

**Me: Can I say something? Can I can I?**

**Aria: Fine.....**

**Me: *jumps up and down* REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW!!!! **

**I will try to get the next chapter as soon as I can, okay? Hopefully I didn't kill you guys from the semi-cliffhanger....**

**Stardust out! **


	19. Every Rose Has its Thorns

*****Salutations everyone! I've updated once again! And let me tell you, it wasn't easy. Writing this chapter caused heck for me and my brain juices. *sigh* Let's just hope I didn't mess up too badly this time, huh? Thanks to Mikomi-oneechan (formerly known as Butterfly. Love. Mikomi) for editing this! **

**Before we go on, I just wanted to point out Aria's current skill level. I know I briefly mentioned it in Chapter 4 but a certain paragraph caused some issues so I changed it along with a few sentences. First off, zanjutsu (swordsmanship) is her best skill: she's very good at it. Kido is second best, nothing special to say. Hakuda third best. (Or second worst I should say. Meh.) And shunpo...Erm.....**

**Aria: Let's not talk about that, shall we?  
Me: ****Ah, c'mon. You only tripped once, right? Er....twice....Ten times is more like it.....Or more.....I lost count after 10.....*sweatdrop*  
Aria: *sigh* Just looking back on that is embarrassing....I can't even look at my grades without turning red....  
****Me: *pats back* There, there. We still love you, Aria. **

**Warning to all: This chapter is rather....gory. You have been warned. Posted 7/19/09**

* * *

A cool wind blew past me as I stood atop a tall fir tree on a hill. The moon was merely a thin crescent in the night sky, but it was enough for me. Clouds blotted out the stars, giving the dark a stifling appearance. The white light from the moon turned the atmosphere a griseous color, making it look like someone had merely penciled everything in.

I looked out into the distance, where a mass of lights were crowded together. A city, that's what Sawahata-kun had called it. It was an area where humans congregated and lived together, much like Rukongai. According to the fourth seat, there were millions of these all across the world, and they weren't all just the same size.

I looked up at the blocked-out sky.

"How do they see the stars, with all those lights blinding them like that?" I murmured to myself.

"Ri-chan! Get down from there!" a voice ordered from below.

"Alright! I'm coming down now!" I called back. I hopped down lithely from branch to branch until I hit the ground. Tree climbing (and descending) was probably the only activity using my feet that I didn't trip all the time over.

Jogging over to a meadow I stopped once I was within earshot of the large group of Soul Reapers in it. Rangiku-san spotted me and waved. I waved back, but I had no need of getting closer.

"Listen up!" a firm, male voice rang out. The surrounding chatting died down at once. "Your mission, as you should already know, is to exterminate the Hollows surrounding the area. You will be divided into groups of five, with a leader for each group. You will all be headed out in different directions so we can get rid of the Hollows faster. You may split from there, but remember you must work as a team to eliminate all of them. If you must, you may call in reinforcements from neighboring teams! Now, the lieutenant will determine your parties…"

The crowd started talking again, everyone eager to be teamed up with someone they knew. Of course no one walked up to me. I looked away, gazing at the distant human habitat. I really didn't care about who I was teamed up with, so long as it wasn't with anyone from my former class.

"Aria!" someone called out. Turning back I saw the fourth seat running towards me.

"Isn't it great? The lieutenant put me in your team, to 'keep an eye on you,' she says. Why she said that I don't know, but aren't you excited? I'm going to totally show you what I can do!"

I nodded absently, looking around for anyone coming towards our group. Noticing this Sawahata-kun also glanced around, as if recalling something.

"Oh, that's right! She put us with someone else too! She's a good friend of mine, so I'm glad we got grouped together. Hey! Over here!" He beckoned over to someone.

Someone ran over and I looked up, but suddenly my muscles locked. A cold chill possessed me and I struggled to move. Standing in front of me was that exact girl that I had looked straight at right before I entered the Senkaimon. Short, copper hair that was uneven at the bottom with thin, gray eyes. Physically she looked like she was 16. As two more men came to join us, she looked displeased, probably because the other girl I saw her whispering to wasn't with us. But then she finally spotted me.

Her gray eyes narrowed sharply and her mouth pulled back in what could none other be a sneer. I twitched but I kept staring back, determined to not be cowed by her. Why? Even though she too treated me with fear at the Academy she was also one of the few who actually _picked _on me for a few things, mostly my height, and also for…something else that I'm still immensely annoyed over. I never really bothered learning her name.

Sawahata-kun looked between the two of us. "Do…you two know each other?"

"We were in the same class back at the Academy," I said through clenched teeth, still glaring at the opposing girl. Her narrow eyes, if it was even possible, narrowed even further.

"Jomei," she said. A vein popped in the back of my head when I heard her voice. Slightly high pitched and reedy; every time I heard it it gave me the impression that she thought she was better than most people. Ugh. I hated people like that. "Jomei, do you know this… person?"

"Er, yeah, she's a friend of mine…" the fourth seat explained uncertainly.

"Hmph," the girl replied, seeming dissatisfied. "Here's a lesson, Jomei, be careful of the friends you make." With that she turned her head away.

I twitched and more veins popped in the back of my head.

_Err… That girl _really_ annoys me. _

_Ugh… I don't like her that much either, _my sword agreed.

"Honestly," I heard her voice say. "How in the world did she become the third seat anyway? That midget probably hypnotized the Captain or something, I honestly can't think of a reason why he of all people would have a good reason for accepting her."

_No, wait, scratch that. She doesn't annoy me. She freaking pisses_ _me off!! _

At that point I really _was _ready to rip her head off. If it wasn't for my hair ribbons I probably would have.

_Calm down, Aria, don't lose control, don't lose control, _I chanted to myself. _Bloody thorns…This is going to be one heck of a mission… _

_You could use that energy for the Hollows! _Kuro suggested. _Just imagine her face on the Hollow's mask and you can slash it all up! Haha! _

_That's true…But it still won't be as satisfying as doing it for real._

She sighed. _Yes, that's true. _

I finally turned away and loosened my apparent death grip on my shihakusho. Reminded of my clothes I looked angrily down to my chest.

_You still can't forgive her for that comment she made, can't you? _My sword perceived, seeming amused.

_Of course not! It's not my fault I'm as flat as a cutting board! Do I look like I've gone through puberty yet?! I don't mind being called short but being called "flat chest" is a bit going over the line! She was probably just showing off her own chest just for the attention… Stupid little…_ And thus I ranted.

"Hey, snap out of it! We're about to start!" Sawahata-kun jabbed me, snapping me out of my murderous thoughts. I stood on tip-toe, trying to see over all the tall heads around me. Next to me the girl snickered. And for once I shot her such a piercing glare that to my great liking shut her up.

_Honestly, you can be really scary when you want to be, _my sword observed.

_So they tell me._

"Remember!" Captain Hitsugaya's voice rang out. "This may only be a training exercise for many of you, but you should never lower your guard! One moment of cockiness and it may be your last! Are you all ready?"

"Yes, sir!" We bellowed back.

"Alright then. Move out!"

The moment he shouted that command everyone flash-stepped away to their designated areas. My team was assigned to a place northwest of here, a couple meters away. Although I was the third seat, I didn't bother leading the group. Instead I left that duty up to Sawahata-kun, who was much more well-liked than me and would probably have less trouble leading.

We leaped from branch to branch, dodging overhanging twigs. I was in the back for two reasons: I had no desire to be near the girl and… I wasn't exactly the best at shunpo. Thankfully I wasn't lagging behind too terribly so no one could really tell.

There was a small clearing up ahead and everyone in front of me jumped down from the trees, in which I followed suit.

"Okay, I think that's far enough," the fourth seat declared.

"What are we going to do now, Sawahata-yonseki (4th seat)?" one of the men asked.

"This area will be our base, somewhere to return to after we're finished with the Hollows," Sawahata-kun explained. "They're up ahead, only a few more yards. We'll go in as a whole group and attack. Once their numbers are down we'll split into smaller groups to get any stragglers. Understand?" When we all nodded our affirmation he continued. "Okay, here are the groups…"

My mind wandered soon after that, though I didn't mean to on purpose. My thoughts were drawn away from the present by the whisperings of the plants all around me.

_Danger… _They murmured.

_Yes I know. We'll get rid of it soon, _I assured.

_No… danger… near…_

What was wrong with them? I already knew that.

_Yes! I understand! We'll be meeting them in a few minutes! _

_No… DANGER! _

The screams shook me out of my musings just in time. Loud cracks erupted behind me and my head swiveled around to see trees breaking and crashing to the ground.

"ARIA!! Get out of the way!!" Sawahata-kun yelled at me.

I didn't think; I followed as he said and used all the power in my legs to push myself backwards. The moment I did something massive came crashing down into the ground, spraying dirt everywhere.

The shrieks and screeches raging inside my head were almost unbearable. My heels dug into the ground as I skidded to a stop and I gripped my head in an effort to drown out the cacophony.

"What in the world…?" One of my comrades mumbled behind me. I squinted against the dust cloud that floated around the collision site, but I already knew what lay beyond.

A loud moan rang through the air and something emerged from the cloud. A creature that resembled a scorpion swept the dust away and brought one of its pincers down, breaking the ground again. A long, plated tail protruded from the back, swinging back and forth among the overhead branches. A white mask with fangs was at the head of the body.

A Hollow.

It was the first real, flesh-and-blood Hollow I had ever seen. And hopefully it would die as easily as it had back when I only fought ones from simulations.

Another wave of voices penetrated my mind and I shook my head as if I could get rid of them that way.

_Danger… Danger… Danger… _That was all they were saying.

_Kuro, if you would please, _I pleaded.

_No problem. _The moment she said that the voices faded away and I could only hear murmurs.

_Thanks so much._

The Hollow gave another moan and its tail swung dangerously.

"It looks like they were closer than we thought," Sawahata-kun remarked to himself.

"It's alright. We don't have to waste all the energy getting to them now," the girl replied.

One of the creature's claws suddenly swung to the side, colliding with a tree. A large crack materialized and the tree broke, toppling to the ground.

I winced when the screams in my head rose once again. Not only could I talk to plants, I could also feel their deaths. Not all the time, mind, but only when the death was an unnatural one, like cracking down the middle and breaking. Kuro sealed the voices away but the feeling of death shook me. Never before had the sensation swept through me before.

I stood up straight, out of my crouched position. My left hand reached back and grasped the hilt of my sword. I pulled it out and gripped it with both hands, my body shifting into a fighting pose.

"Hang on…What are you doing, Aria?" the fourth seat asked, sounding worried. I ignored him and jumped, my eyes focusing ahead.

"W-Wait a sec! Aria! Are you out of you mind? Aria!" He called after me, but it was too late. I was already in front of the beast now. I pulled my sword back against the side of my face, aiming for the mask.

_Just a bit farther… And no more deaths… _I thought.

Something whistled through the air to my right and I only had barely a second to move my sword into a blocking position. The plated tail of the Hollow clashed with my blade, sending a few sparks.

"Shoot," I whispered to myself. The force of the impact was enough to make me jump away. Luckily there was a tree so I landed on my feet against the trunk and rebounded, leaping back towards it.

This time one of the Hollow's pincers came hurtling towards me. Tightening my grip on Kuro, I took careful aim, and WHOOSH!

The claw disconnected from the arm of the creature, falling onto the ground. Blood spewed from the wrist, and the Hollow writhed in agony, uttering a high-pitched groan. It panicked and the second arm stabbed toward me. Since I was already standing in the air I jumped upwards to avoid it and landed on the wrist. I swung downwards and thus the second arm was cut off.

The Hollow was definitely going mad now. It flailed around wildly, blood flying in flecks.

_Enough of this, _I thought to myself. I flash-stepped down, narrowly missing the swinging tail. I didn't want to waste time with it, going straight for the face. Before it knew it, I was already in front of its mask. I drew my sword back and thrust it forward.

The blade easily pierced through the bone-white face, right in the area between the eyes. The Hollow emitted an ear-splitting screech and its body reared, and then it simply dissolved away in black particles.

I landed back onto the ground softly and waved Kurobararyu, trying to get rid of the blood dripping down the blade.

_Well done, _Kuro commented to me.

_That was easier than I had expected… Except for that stupid tail…_

_Well you'd better get ready, because I'm absolutely sure that they'll be more. _I nearly groaned at that statement.

"Aria!" Someone called behind me. Obviously it was Sawahata-kun.

"Hey! Are you alright? No huge injuries?" he asked. All the others were still in the same place, looking at me with incredulous expressions.

"No, I'm fine," I assured. In truth my arm was a bit sore from blocking that tail, but I was sure that it would go away.

"That was amazing! How on Earth did you get rid of it so fast?"

"Erm… I always got really good grades on my zanjutsu… Of course my shunpo scores were an entirely different story…" I shuddered as I thought about it.

"I'll say! That was really cool! I—"

"Excuse me! Are you done?" A female voice called behind us.

"Yeah, yeah, we're done," Sawahata-kun replied.

I sensed something then. I quickly pulled out my sword and once again shifted into a fighting position.

"Sawahata-kun…" I cautioned.

"Yeah, yeah… I hear ya, I hear ya." He too unsheathed his sword and held it in his right hand. The others cautiously followed suit. "Finally, some fun for me."

_How on Earth is slashing up Hollows fun? Oh, never mind…_

Several moans erupted through the forest and all of us prepared ourselves.

_Here they come… _Kuro muttered.

The earth rumbled and another Hollow emerged. This one had an oversized torso with enormous arms and a rather generic mask. It looked around, probably sniffing for victims, and suddenly punched toward me.

I leaped back, trying to head for a more open area. The fourth seat followed, silently giving the role of leadership to me. I gave a tiny smirk as I ran.

And thus it began.

***

I slashed downwards, killing a Hollow for the umpteenth time. I wasn't even paying attention to what they looked like anymore; whatever came I simply sliced.

I admit, I was overly anxious over this mission. There really was no problem dealing with real Hollows; they really died as easily as simulations.

Something that looked like a tongue shot towards me from the side and I jumped. Once I was in the air I lunged, cutting away about half of the tongue. The Hollow it belonged to screamed and tried to attack again, but I carefully flash-stepped away and gave it cuts all along the arms and shoulders to distract it. Finally I appeared in front of the face and shoved Kuro forward.

_Another one. How many has it been now?_ She asked nonchalantly.

_I… lost count. Why would I be counting in the first place? _

_It's just something to do, since this is so easy it's almost boring. _

True, the corrupted souls didn't seem too challenging, but there was absolutely no way I would be lowering my guard. I ran forward, cutting down even more Hollows.

However, as time passed, something dawned on me. There shouldn't have been so many Hollows in this area. I looked around and frowned. There were still a fair number of them, even with the others fighting them.

_You're right, it's strange for there to be so many. I thought there'd only be maybe six or seven of them, _Kuro agreed, sounding worried.

I pondered this as well, standing in the air for a few seconds.

Big mistake.

I was thinking so deeply that I didn't feel anything come up behind me. It was only at the very last minute when I felt the air move that I turned around.

My eyes widened. Three Hollows at once? I flashed away, only to have another launch an attack.

_Bloody thorns…_ I cursed. One of the creatures threw a punch at me, in which I cut the arm away easily along with its face. Suddenly another clawed appendage hurled itself at me and I just barely hopped away. A scratch appeared on the bridge of my nose, a tiny stream of blood flowing.

"Dammit," I swore to myself. Just slicing all of them wouldn't work now; I'd have to use something else.

"Bakudo Number 4: Hainawa (Crawling Rope)!" I cried out. A yellow cord of energy burst from my palm and shot itself toward a Hollow, binding it tightly. It moaned as it struggled, but my kido didn't falter.

"Now's my chance!" I bounded over its head, landing right behind it. My sword in my left hand, I ripped it across the black skin. As it faded away so did the yellow rope.

A shadow fell upon me and I held my hand out.

"Hado #31: Shakkaho (Red Flame Cannon)!" A glowing red ball discharged and landed in the Hollow's stomach, giving off a small explosion. With it distracted I ran forward and dug Kuro into its face.

I breathed heavily as I sheathed my sword. _What in the world is going on here? _I thought. _All the Hollows should be dead by now! If this keeps up…_

It was at that moment that I remembered the other Soul Reapers on the team. How would they fare against all those fiends? I couldn't even remember what ranks they were… If they even had one that is…

_Aria! Watch out!_

"What the—"

Something struck me and I was sent sprawling. After rolling in the dirt for a few moments I finally managed to stop after colliding with the base of a tree. I gripped my right hip, wincing.

_That's going to hurt in the morning… Ow… On second thought, it's hurting now…_

I looked up and gave a small gasp. Five Hollows stood in front of me, in all shapes and sizes. I looked toward the other Soul Reapers and bit my lip when I realized they were fighting large amounts of Hollows at the same time as well, and they weren't having an easy time with it. I didn't even try to count them. I grimaced as I struggled to stand, a hand on the tree trunk to support myself. Unwillingly I drew my hand away from my bruise and clutched Kuro.

"Guess I have no choice now..." I puffed softly.

_Are you… going to do it? _Kurobararyu asked, sounding excited.

_Yes…I am. I don't care if this causes trouble for me later; if I don't do it now there won't _be_ a later._

Leaping upwards onto a bough I drew my blade and held it out horizontally in front of me.

"Flare your bloodthirsty thorns…" I uttered quietly. "Kurobararyu."

**

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**

*** Whoops. It seems I've left a cliffhanger. *evil laugh* Holy cow! Almost 100 reviews???? I LOVE YOU ALL!!!*glamps all of you*

**Me: *laughs and pokes* AHA!! You've got a chest complex! Haha!  
Aria: *blushes* I do not! Why should I? It's not like I should have a chest or anything! At least not right now....  
Me: Right....Well maybe if you ate more vegetables you'd have a better time.  
Aria: *blushes even harder* SHUT UP! I only don't eat them because it's like cannibalism!  
Me: Sure, sure, you say that, but I know that's just a cover up. You just don't like eating them like many other people out there. You know, kids need vegetables to be able to grow. So if you want to get a chest you're going to have to eat your veggies.  
Aria: SHUT UP!**

**Yes, I know it's amazing, people. Aria doesn't like to eat vegetables. Just a random tidbit that I didn't know how to put into the story. No wonder she's so short.  
Aria: I said shut it....**

***bangs head on table* I *bang* can't *bang* write *bang* fight *bang* scenes! *bang* RAAAAAAAAARRRRRRGGGGGGGGG!!! (I don't know if I screamed because I can't write them or if it's because I bashed my head on the table so much.) **

**Review please, everyone. This was my first real attempt at fight scenes. Any kind of critique is welcome! Until next time, darlings, I bid you adieu! (I know, I'm a total weirdo.) **


	20. The Black Rose

*****YAY!! I UPDATED!!!! Sorry it took so long, especially after the last chapter. I had a parade thingy and I've been busy with that. Tip for anyone that wants to be in a parade: If you're planning on changing shoes before you go on, MAKE SURE YOU BRING BOTH TENNIS SHOES. That happened to a girl there: she only brought one shoe and so she had to go buy a new pair....**

**I apologize in advance if this chappie seems kind of redundant; I was getting lazy with the killing-Hollows thing going on. Another gory chapter, so be warned. **

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A flurry of rose petals enveloped my sword, shrouding it from view. I could feel my reiatsu level steadily rising as wind swirled around me.

At last the gale of blossoms was blown away and for a moment I marveled at the object in my hand.

Instead of a regular katana, a staff/scepter was in my hand. The shaft was a blood red and slender enough that it fit in my grip easily. On one end of the weapon was a large, closed dark purple bud with short vines covered in thorns growing from the bottom of it. These vines were also wrapped the top area of the staff. The other end only held a small, round purple jewel.

I swept Kurobararyu's released form side to side, adjusting to the feel of it.

_It's been much too long, _I "greeted."

_Yes, it has. When was the last time you released me? _

_I think it was months ago, back in that sparring match…But I returned you to your sealed form right after, so I suppose you never really had a chance to breathe, huh? _

_Oh yes, I can finally taste the air! _Kuro exclaimed. _But you know what else I can taste?_

_What?_

_The taste of our enemy's blood. _

I smirked at her comment. There was a reason that her release command was, "Flare your bloodthirsty thorns." Kuro was a rather vicious creature for a plant-type zanpakuto.

But it's not like I didn't share that trait with her.

The Hollows facing me let out echoing moans, a challenge. I swung the rose scepter to my left.

"Out of my way…Shred them to pieces, Kuro," I ordered.

The earth surrounding us suddenly erupted, and barbed vines like the one on my zanpakuto shot out. They wrapped easily around a Hollow's two arms, the sharp thorns causing some bleeding.

And then the vines pulled.

I jumped back in order to dodge the blood raining down. The victim tumbled onto the earth, the crimson liquid pooling. It let out a deep keening, trying to stand, but without both its arms it would never work.

Running forward I drew back Kuro. There may be a bud on one end, but it was sharp and thus had the function of a spear. I skidded to a stop right before the great beast's face, pulled back my weapon and—

A single image suddenly flashed for an instant before my eyes:

A mangled corpse in a pool of blood.

I shook my head vigorously and plunged the sharp end into the Hollow's face. It disappeared without any trouble.

More groans pierced the evening air. I remembered the remaining four Hollows. Turning toward their charging figures I raised a hand.

"No point in holding back…They'll all be dead anyway…" I clenched my fist.

More vines burst out and bound themselves around the fallen souls. They desperately struggled, but the more they did the tighter the vines went.

I took those moments to quickly dispatch them and watched as they vanished. Once that mess was over, I pinched the bridge of my nose (which was still bleeding) and shook my head. The image from before still lingered at the edge of my conscious.

_I think I'm going to put you back now, _I thought weakly.

…_Ah. That's too bad. I was just released too, _Kuro acquiesced. Strange. I would have thought that she would refuse because she wanted to be released for a long time. Holding her to the side I was prepared to her seal when all of a sudden I heard yells coming over from not too far off. I cursed under my breath.

"Dang it…I forgot about the others!" With that I leaped off, ignoring the cries of happiness from my sword.

I slid to a stop and observed the other Soul Reapers for a few moments, and it did not look good. Sawahata-kun was able to kill all the Hollows easily, but the sheer numbers were beginning to overwhelm him. The other three were barely able to hold up.

Then I spotted the fourth seat killing a Hollow and resting for just a moment. A shadow suddenly befell him, and the Hollow silently raised its arm. I knew that there was no way he could dodge that in time.

I swung Kuro in his direction and a thick vine ruptured from the earth and fired toward the boy. I could see his face bursting with surprise as the plant quickly wrapped itself tightly around his waist and hauled him in my direction.

"Oof!" he groaned as the vine roughly tossed him to the ground. He made a face as he rubbed his back but then finally noticed me. "Aria…?"

"Sorry for the rough landing," I apologized. "I was in a bit of a hurry." I gestured toward the Hollow that was about to smash him to a pulp. It glanced around, looking for its lost prey.

"Wow…Guess I'll have to thank you for saving my life, huh?" He rose off the ground, dusting himself off. When he looked at me his eyes were immediately drawn to the scepter in my hand.

"Is that…?"

"Er, yes, this is my zanpakuto, Kurobararyu. I was in a spot of trouble so I had to…"

Without permission he poked her. "A plant? How's a plant supposed to hurt anything?"

I twitched and poked him back with the sharp end of my zanpakuto. He jumped away, rubbing the place where I jabbed him. "Every rose has its thorns, Sawahata-kun. And it's more than just a simple plant, as you say."

I turned my body back to the beast that was just about to attack. I summoned some tree roots in the vicinity and they slowly broke out from the terrain, growing around the Hollow. Too late it noticed them and tried to break free. But there was no escaping my deadly garden.

Once it was fully trapped, I did what I did before: I ordered the roots to pull. And you know what happened next.

Sawahata-kun stared at the gory scene. "I'll never be able to see plants the same ever again," he muttered.

I was about to make a reply when another image appeared in my mind.

A broken building covered in plants, being slowly crushed.

I closed my eyes tightly and shook my head, arguing with myself.

_This isn't wrong…I'm not hurting anyone now…So why are the memories still showing up? This isn't at all what it was like before…Is it? _

_This is no time to think about that, Aria! _Kuro yelled at me. _Have you forgotten where we are?!_

I snapped out of my thoughts and launched another assault on the surrounding enemies. I was incredibly surprised at how easy it was to kill the Hollows with Kuro released. Surrounding plants would hold them down while I sliced their faces. Sometime during the fray Sawahata-kun had called in the other Soul Reapers so no one would take on the numerable beasts alone, but I didn't join them.

Still, the sheer numbers of Hollows disturbed me. The fourth seat had tried calling in reinforcements, but they too had to deal with what seemed like the army of Hollows.

"Where's the captain and lieutenant when you need them…?" he mumbled to himself.

If Captain Hitsugaya and Rangiku-san were here, what would happen? I admit I was curious to see what their zanpakuto releases were like.

_Aria…_Kuro cautioned.

_Sorry, sorry, lost focus there for a moment. It won't happen again._

And it didn't. Why did it seem like for every Hollow I killed, two would take its place? There really was no _end _to them. If I lost my concentration for a moment I was sure to die. That was difficult to do as gory illustrations from my past kept springing into my mind. Every time that happened I would hesitate for the slightest moment, but I had no time for that here.

"Bloody thorns," I growled under my breath when the wave of Hollows stopped for a short moment. "What is going on here?"

"Sawahata-yonseki, has there been any communication with Captain Hitsugaya yet?" one of two male Soul Reapers asked.

The addressed looked at the headphone with a frustrated expression. He shook his head. "No, I haven't heard a word. It's just static. I can barely reach the surrounding teams. It's like something's jamming the signal. Dammit, dammit, _dammit, _what the hell is going on here?"

"Look out!" the girl shouted out. A barbed tail soared down.

"Bakudo #9: Geki (Strike)!" I cried. The wide tail stopped abruptly, as well as the entire reptilian-like Hollow, and emitted a red light. It shuddered and tried desperately to move. Before the spell would have a chance a break I launched a very sharp vine at it. It pierced straight through the white mask, all the way to the other side of its head, and it dissolved.

The release of Kurobararyu had mixed reactions from the other four Soul Reapers. The two males looked with amazed faces and I might have even detected a hint of admiration in their eyes. However the girl shivered a little bit every time I attacked and would turn away. I wasn't exactly too happy about this, even though it was expected.

_I'm the one saving her hide, and she's still acting like a total…_I fumed in my mind. I let out my irritation by slashing up the corrupted souls before me, growling dark comments as I did.

No matter how annoyed I got, there was no way I was letting my temper get the better of me. Not here, at least. While I admit my hair ribbons hindered me it didn't get to a point where I absolutely had to remove them. No, that would only be a last resort.

I jumped in surprised when five Hollows suddenly leaped at me all at once. I pointed my zanpakuto upwards and was about to fire an attack when all of a sudden another creature charged at me from the ground.

"What the—"was all I could utter before shifting Kuro into both hands and blocking the clawed hands of the small but agile Hollow. I managed to push it back a bit and barely dodge and kill the other lunging Hollows but it charged again, this time gripping my weapon and pushing. I had no other choice: I pushed back. Digging my feet into the earth I used my legs as leverage and pushed back with my entire body, instead of just using my arms. For the moment I was winning, and I wanted to smile at my achievement, but all my focus was set on driving back the creature.

The moment I was about to fully push it back and slash at it, however, it shocked me when one of its sharp feet pulled back and aimed for my stomach. At the last minute I was able to see it and move a little so that it wouldn't land on my abdomen, but its talons still managed to graze my thigh and leave a gash.

The sharp pain sent a sudden jolt into my system and I rapidly forced it back and sliced it in half, thus killing it.

I collapsed onto my good leg, my palm clutching the bleeding wound. I tried to remember how to use healing kido that I learned from my time at the Academy. I wasn't Fourth Division material, but hopefully I could do enough to seal the cut.

"I can't keep this up forever," I whispered to myself. I asked myself for the umpteenth time what was going on.

Today was just not my day. Slowly but surely I could my anger building up inside me, instead of the irritation from before. I blew off some steam by sending vines through the bodies of the Hollows, but it wasn't completely enough.

_Will it really come to the point where I have to use _that_? _I asked myself.

_Go ahead. There's no law that says you can't._

_No, not now. I'll save that for when I really need it._

_Like your hair ribbons? _My sword added dryly.

…_Okay maybe earlier than the ribbons. _

I tried to get up, and to my relief my leg could still function correctly, albeit being a bit wobbly. I hoped that it wouldn't impede on my ability to fight.

Unfortunately, that wish was about to be tested when more Hollows headed my way. I snarled incoherently and killed them all in a couple hits, but then just like before once the others were dead another leaped at me.

_Oh, gimme a break! _I shrieked in my head. I leaped back as it swept its fist at me and in return I hurdled forward, jabbing my scepter straight ahead. The cursed thing dodged and charged.

To my distress, this Hollow was cleverer than the others and smaller, so it had the simple ability to dodge my jabs. There wasn't a way my plants could get it while it was this quick. It went on like this for a while, me stabbing at it and it would dodge and retaliate.

And then, out of the corner of my eye, I saw something. The girl was currently facing off against a rather large Hollow. Apparently it looked like it was hard to slay because no matter how many times she hacked at it, it would still manage to get up and hit back. But that wasn't why I watching.

With her concentration entirely on the creature before her, she didn't think of covering her back. And that left her vulnerable. And it looked like another Hollow had figured that out. The reason I was suddenly looking over to her was because I saw a creature stalk up to her unawares. If she didn't turn around soon she'd be killed.

In between evading attacks and doing my own I frantically looked around for someone to help her. Unfortunately everyone else was occupied, even Sawahata-kun. Obviously I couldn't do it. But if something wasn't done soon, the girl would die.

I didn't want that.

As much as the girl annoyed the heck out of me, I couldn't bring myself to let her die because of that petty reason. That would make a true monster to the essence, to let someone die because they irritated you and you could have done something about it. Wouldn't that be murder?

I wracked my brain for some way to get out of the situation and the only way currently was to yell at her. I couldn't get the Hollow myself because _the darned thing I was facing just wouldn't stand still and die. _It was either that reason or I was just getting tired.

I managed to force back the Hollow enough to give me some room. Taking in a deep breath I was about to shout to her…

When a sudden detail came crashing down on me.

I didn't know the girl's name.

_Stupid, stupid, stupid! _I shouted at myself. Now I'm wishing that I hadn't been so petty and learned my classmates' names. Stupid, stupid…

I thought as hard as I could while the Hollow kept on charging at me. It got to a point where I didn't even bother striking back; half my mind was on remembering the girl's name and half was on blocking and/or dodging assaults.

_Damn it all, _I snarled in my head. _What was her name…Er…?_

Kozue. Finally, I had something. But that was her first name, and there was no way I was going to be so familiar with her.

I panicked when I watched the sneaking Hollow advancing on her. Kozue what? I…Iwa…It was Iwa-something… Oh please, let me remember it in time…

Meanwhile, I still had so much to do. Somehow I had managed to kill the opposing creature but now Hollows were storming in left and right. One leaped overhead and I bounded upwards and slashed its middle. Then another tried to bite my arm and I summoned vines to stab it. Every second I was leaping and slicing—it was a wonder that I was able to think clearly at that point. Even with all the plants around me I just couldn't get them all down at once.

And I admit I was honest-to-goodness panicking right now. Not only for the girl, but also for me and everyone else. I wasn't sure if we'd all survive this onslaught. If this kept up, I would have no choice but to remove my hair ribbons and go all out.

Speaking of the girl Kozue, I was seriously having a brain hemorrhage thinking of her name.

_Iwasaki? No, that's not it either…If I get out of this alive I'm going to kill myself instead by banging my head on the wall for being so stupid…_ _Iwa…Iwaha…Iwahara! That's her last name! Finally! _

Summoning a large portion of my energy I grew large tree roots and wrapped them all around the enemies around me so that nothing would interfere. I inhaled deeply, preparing to scream my lungs out, when I realized that the sneaking Hollow was much too close. Even if I yelled at her, Iwahara still wouldn't have enough time to attack. The creature was close enough that if I yelled at her it could easily just lunge and kill her before she could react to my warning.

And yet I still had to try. Even though I was incredibly panicked I had to take a chance. But something deep inside me believed that I may have been too late. And that made me despair to the point that I couldn't even think straight.

But when I opened my mouth to cry out, "Iwahara!" like I wanted to, something else happened.

"_Kisoku Bara _(Breathing Rose)_!"_ I practically screamed at the top of my lungs.

The purple bud on my zanpakuto suddenly burst open and purple-black flames laced with purple flower petals erupted. Quickly I aimed my arm so that the blitz would hit the creeping Hollow. The flames gushed out in a line and headed in a straight line. The Hollow raised its club-like arm on the unsuspecting girl but before it could swing it down my flames collided and sent it soaring into a tree. Since they were flames after all, they scorched the creature's body and it died with a suffocated groan.

Breathing heavily my mind scrambled to figure out what had just happened.

_You were so panicked that your body went out of control, and instead you voiced what you really wanted to do, _Kuro helpfully explained.

_What I wanted to do?_

_You believed deep in your heart that even if you had shouted her name she wouldn't have enough time to retaliate before the Hollow would kill her. So in the back of your mind your resolve to scream her name changed into attacking the beast itself, which would give her a better chance to live. But you were so unnerved you didn't realize it and it left your mind weak, and so your strong latent desire took over. Do you understand what I'm saying here? _

…_I think so. Are you sure you didn't have anything to do with it?_

_Er…I might have helped…Might. But that's beside the point. Aria, do you realized now that you have to use the Kisoku Bara if you want to survive? Because now it has come to a point where you have to use _that. _Am I right? _

I sighed. She was right. I should have used it from the start. Captain Hitsugaya's parting words before we all set out on this accursed mission rang in my ears. Didn't he warn us not to get cocky?

_I'm not sure that was the reason you didn't use it, but I suggest you start to focus, _Kuro reminded me.

She was right _again. _Honestly, how many times was I going to space out during this mission? But I had to take care of something first.

I hadn't realized that Kozue Iwahara had been watching me for a while now. It wasn't until I shook myself out of my thoughts that I noticed her wide stare. I tried to smile, but it turned so sheepish that it probably looked more like a grimace. So instead I hesitantly raised my hand and waved, just a tiny bit. But it was her reaction that shocked me the most.

Her face turned almost…_guilty _as she bowed her head very slightly to me. While I stared at her in astonishment she raised her head and said something. While I was too far away to hear her, I could make out the words but reading her lips.

"Thank you…" I said to myself. My eyes widened and I could barely resist the urge to drop my jaw. Iwahara? _Thanking _me? I had the strangest temptation to yell out, "Who are you and what have you done with Iwahara?"

_Oh come now, it's not _that _uncharacteristic for her. At least she's a person who knows when to act grateful, _Kuro contradicted. Meanwhile Iwahara simply nodded her head once to me and returned to fighting once more.

My head still reeling from what happened, I turned around and yelped as a Hollow charged at me. Talk about jumping three feet in the air, because that's exactly what I did, only a bit higher. When I came down I landed straight on the Hollow's neck, putting all the force in my legs to smashing its face into the ground. The ground cracked under the force and I stabbed Kuro's sharp end into the Hollow's back, causing blood to gush from the wound. The creature wriggled but I weighted it down.

"Kisoku Bara!" I cried.

Again purple-black flames poured from the bud, but since it was stuck in the Hollow's flesh the blaze was clogged, as I wanted it to. The victim struggled and bucked even more, trying to toss me off its back, but since I was feeling a little sadistic I had vines tie it down. The fire slowly built up more and more and the beast looked like it was slowly _inflating. _And then, as I expected, it exploded in an eruption of embers. I jumped away to avoid getting hit by any debris from the blast as crimson liquid splashed everywhere.

_That was extremely gory, even for you, _my sword commented.

…_I was in the mood. If I'm going to use that attack, I might as well use all the chances I have._

I glanced around and noticed that the number of Hollows had gone down, probably because they ran away once they saw my new attack. I got rid of the poor creatures left behind and once I was done with that I collapsed onto the ground, trying to catch my breath.

I knew now that wasn't the time for that, but I had to gather my strength in case more came back. I hefted my zanpakuto in both hands.

It was so ironic how a plant-type sword like mine actually possessed a fire attack. I was so surprised when I first discovered the move, I thought about it for a long time before Kuro finally gave me an explanation.

_It represents that unique fieriness you have, _she had chuckled. But she had meant what she said.

Fieriness? As in my uncontrollable temper? I never viewed myself as a fiery type. No, no, that was someone else…

But I was never afraid of the flames. No, Kisoku Bara's flare was special. While in many aspects it was just like any other fire, there were two things that it did not burn: myself and other plants. I was so glad for the latter because I would have felt so guilty if I used the attack and I ended killing so many innocent consciousnesses.

"Aria!" a familiar voice called. Without turning I addressed the fourth seat.

"Yes, Sawahata-kun?" I answered quietly. I was still quite tired.

"It looks like you took care of things quite well here," he started off. Out of the corner of my eye I noticed how he glanced skittishly at the burn marks leftover from the Kisoku Bara.

"I suppose so."

"Honestly, just when I think I've got you all figured you go and spring something like this on me and totally surprise me. That purple fire thingy scared the heck out of me for a moment."

"What makes you think that I've let you figure me out, Sawahata-kun?"

"Er, never mind. Anyway, I'm going to leave now, okay? I need to go take care of the stragglers."

"Alright, I'll go with you then." I rose from my seat on the ground and dusted myself off. To my surprise the fourth seat shook his head.

"Ah, no, you stay here. I can take care of this myself. Just rest up." He moved his hands into his pockets. I opened my mouth to protest.

"But you can't just go alone! You saw how many there were! You'll need backup!"

"I'll be fine, Aria. I'll just call for any squads close by for help if I need to. Besides, you and the rest of the gang look pretty beat up, literally."

I scrutinized him suspiciously. He didn't look that much better off than the rest of us. "You don't look that great either. And I thought you couldn't contact other squads."

"Look, _I_ _can handle this. _You may have released your zanpakuto, but you've yet to see mine. I admit I was stupid for not doing the same, but this time I won't be as merciful. I'll be fine. And I'll probably be close enough to other groups that I can just yell." He gave me a reassuring grin.

I exhaled sharply. I could see I was getting nowhere in this argument. "Alright, you can go… Just promise me that you'll stay safe, okay?"

"Scout's honor," he mock saluted. I rolled my eyes and shook my head. "Fine, I promise. See you later." He turned his back and flash-stepped away.

I sighed and dropped back onto the ground. I glanced around to check on everyone, seeing as Sawahata-kun had left. One of the men (I really need to learn names more) was leaning against the trunk of a tree, resting up just as I was. Iwahara was with the other, apparently healing some injuries.

_All that brain power wasted…_ I thought grumpily.

_I don't think so. You two will probably get along well in the future, so knowing her name was a good thing, _my sword suggested.

_Couldn't I have just looked it up? _

_That's just being lazy, Aria. Imagine how embarrassing it would be if she approached you before you looked her up. You'd be clueless. And how would you look her up if you don't know her name?!_

I didn't have the motivation to respond.

Gazing up at the sky, I observed the still-cloudy expanse. It was not that different from the last time I looked at it, which seemed so long ago, even though it was probably just an hour or so. The only distinction was that the clouds seemed puffier and more abundant than before. The moon was still a sliver, giving the swirls an overpowering impression.

_It looks almost ominous… _I pondered to myself.

And then, at that moment, something shifted.

I didn't know what it was, but I could tell that something in the air had changed. Kurobararyu and I tensed.

_Something's wrong…_ We both thought.

I could tell that I wasn't the only one to feel the difference. The other Soul Reapers around us glanced around, as though searching for something. I did also, my eyes darting back and forth. What could possibly happen now? I didn't like the fact that we were one person short.

Something in the atmosphere above caught my eye. I wheeled, squinting, trying to get a better look. It was a very strange thing indeed, what I saw.

Straight black lines stretched across the wide expanse.

**

* * *

**

***Okay, this is a random note, but I watched the newest Bleach filler ep, and I'm pretty sure it's the best one so far.....So I was thinking, do you guys think I should change Kurobararyu's name? You see, the thing is all the Zanpakuto spirits in that ep at least have a humanly form, even Hyorinmaru, which I wasn't expecting. And Kurobararyu....doesn't exactly have a humanly form, but the name kind of....Anyway I was thinking I could change the name, so tell me what you think!

**Me: *screaming* AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! DON'T KILL ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
Jomei: *murderous* DIE, EVIL SHE-DEMON!!!!! HOW DARE YOU LEAVE ANOTHER CLIFFHANGER!!!! DIE!!!!  
Me: I'M SORRY, I'M SORRY!!! PLEASE DON'T KILL ME!!! I'LL MAKE IT UP NEXT CHAPTER!!!  
Jomei: RRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!  
Me: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!  
Aria: *shakes head* Idiots.....**


	21. The Snake in the Bushes

*****It's about time I updated... Geez, this chappie was pretty hard for me to write because I had to think about whether or not I wanted to split it into two chappies or not, because this was originally more than 10 FREAKING PAGES!!! And I was having serious motivational issues with writing it (aka I was lazy) so it might not be the best thing you've ever read. *sigh* Since this was originally one chapter, I should have the second part up in a couple days....I hope. Someone needs to smack me....**

**Aria: I'll gladly do it!  
Me: NOT YOU!! If you do it then I might as well kill myself now!!!**

**Oh yeah, and I changed my name because I was bored, but you guys can still call me Star! Posted 8/23/2009**

* * *

The black lines streaked across the sky, appearing to have no path, but everywhere it touched more lines would spread.

Finally the streaks finished inking themselves, and it looked very strange. There was a single boxy, horizontal line that sprouted many vertical lines of varying lengths. In a way, it looked like a wrinkled mouth.

Something in the back of my head clicked; I swore I could have seen it before. Yet I still couldn't place what it was. Where had I seen it before? A book? A lesson from class? Where…?

Despite that fact however, I clasped Kurobararyu tightly, preparing myself. For what, I wasn't sure, but I had a feeling that it wasn't good.

And then the horizontal line began to open.

It truly seemed like a mouth now. The streak began to split and it emitted what seemed to me like a buzz. It was the kind of sound that one might associate with ripping.

The maw revealed a chaotic swirl of what appeared to be reishi (spirit particles). They churned and whirled against a gray-black background. And in the middle of it all was a dark figure.

And that's when I felt it.

That spiritual pressure. It was strong and weighed upon me, but what caught my attention the most was how strange it felt. I expected it to be a Hollow, yet the reiatsu didn't feel like it, though it was very close…There was something else laced in it…

The silhouette moved and took a step forward. Then it followed up, walking more confidently out into the open. The white moonlight illuminated its body. I scrutinized it as I took a closer look, and then I felt the blood drained from my face.

It clearly had the body of a female teenager. She had a slim build with long, black hair in two pigtails on the sides of her head. Her right eye was pink, and it was the only one visible. The other eye had fragments of a mask covering it and it extended over her pigtail. Her outfit hugged her figure and the top was quite revealing. She wore black boots. Her clothes seemed ragged however; they looked like they used to be a clean white, but now they had tattered edges and had some dirty smudges.

An Arrancar.

Now that was a name I _had _remembered. I gnawed on my lip as I stared up at the formidable creature. She glanced around, appearing to assess her surroundings.

I had learned about Arrancar in a lesson at the Academy. It was a brief lesson, but the teachers did give us key information about them. As I remember, Arrancar were Hollows who removed their masks and…gained Soul Reaper powers. This process was done through an item named the Hogyoku, but when asked how it came to be, the teacher simply shook his head, saying that he didn't know. I thought that was very strange, but I didn't question it. I recalled that Arrancar wielded zanpakutos just like Soul Reapers and could release them as well. I couldn't dredge up any more details beyond that, but I do remember this: the teacher had told us that if ever confronted by an Arrancar, take extreme caution. They are very dangerous and can kill easily if given the chance.

I could see what they meant. Even now the reiatsu of the new enemy was as if someone had put a huge burden on my shoulders. My knees were even shaking a bit.

_How can I possibly stand up to that? _I wondered doubtfully.

_You know how, _Kuro whispered back to me. I shook my head vigorously.

_No, I can't. I can't take my ribbons off, Kuro! What will happen? Everyone will be scared of me more than they already are!_

_Not if you save all of their lives…_

I didn't answer, but I disagreed. Humans had always been afraid of things that were different from the norm. And what are we but former humans with enhanced abilities? The emotions, thinking patterns, all of it was still the same. It didn't matter if I saved their lives. That was the case back in Rukongai, and I knew it was the same here.

_You shouldn't doubt others so much, Aria. Have faith._

I chuckled scornfully. _You expect to have faith after what I've been through? I can't, Kuro, I just can't. What will happen if I believe and then everything shatters again? My heart can't take much more. _

_Someone's unusually bitter. Those Hollows must have addled your senses._

_Hmph._

Our conversation over, I turned my attention back to the Arrancar.

She was still looking around, but when her eyes spotted me she stopped. I swallowed compulsively. Her face turned into something between a smile and a sneer.

"My, my, what a cute little Soul Reaper you are!" she commented in a sick sing-song voice. "Why not play with Loly-chan a bit?"

Poisoned honey. That was the first thought I had when she finished speaking.

She leaped from her spot in the air and landed lithely on the grass not too far from me. I backed away slowly. She mock-pouted.

"Oh, don't be like that! Loly-chan has been _so _lonely these past few days. She's had no one to play with for a long time because all her toys were broken!" The Arrancar named Loly stepped forward. I continued to scoot back. "And now I've found a new toy! Hopefully…" Her grin widened sadistically. I shivered. "You won't break as easily as all the others!"

And then she disappeared.

My head wheeled around wildly, trying to find her. The arm holding Kuro was trembling and I used my other to hold it still.

"Aria!" Iwahara's voice rang out. Shoot, I had forgotten about them for a moment…

Suddenly something whooshed behind me, and before I could gather my thoughts there was a muffled crunch and I was sent flying. My back collided with a tree trunk and the wood splintered behind me. I groaned impulsively and slid into a fetal position, clutching my side. I could hear the voices of the other Soul Reapers, but I couldn't focus on their precise words.

_So fast…I think… I have a broken rib…_I thought, not having the energy to speak aloud. I desperately gasped for breath, my hair obscuring my face. It felt _horrible_; I had never broken a bone before. And from how hard she hit me, I think it was broken very badly.

"Oh, so you're still alive?" a voice said. I flinched, not that anyone could see. Some of my hair wasn't entirely covering my face and out of that space I watched as Loly walked casually toward me. Coughing I pushed myself up with one arm, the other still gripping my side. Focusing my pained thoughts I summoned Kurobararyu's power.

A vine silently grew from the soil, unbeknownst by the Arrancar. It rose a little more, and then it struck out like a snake, whipping Loly's back and launching her into the grass. It was the best I could do for now.

The enemy spluttered as she struggled to get up, spitting dirt from her mouth. She looked at the place where I hit her; a large rip had appeared on her clothing, but there didn't seem to be any visible damage.

"Why you—"she hissed. She glared daggers at me and I struggled to stand up to defend myself. Grimacing I called upon even more barbed plants, and they launched themselves at her. Sneering she jumped away and I guided the plants toward her. All of a sudden she disappeared again and then reappeared right behind the plants.

_How is she doing that? _I wondered. _Is it shunpo? _

_I think…it's sonido _(Spanish for "sound")_. A teacher from class said it was an Arrancar's equivalent of shunpo. _

I huffed and immediately winced due my aching rib. _Great, just what I need. An opponent who's faster than me. Just wonderful. _

I hated performing shunpo back at the Academy. It wasn't that I was bad at the actual shunpo, it was just that I was constantly falling over my feet, which slowed me down. I had to get extra practice just to get a passing grade. It was the few things those days that made me truly irritated—Kuro would always chuckle at that, which didn't make it any better.

Concentrating on my attacks, the vines suddenly veered off course and whipped backwards, catching Loly off guard. A few vines managed to give her a few small cuts but she was quick and sonidoed away. She appeared high in the sky, looking down upon me.

"You annoying little brat!" she spat. "How dare you?!" She jumped down, practically flying towards me.

Venomous. That was the perfect word to describe her. Ever word that slid from her lips was filled with murderous intent.

Standing up straight, I gasped for breath as my injured rib throbbed. But I stayed strong, refusing to waver even as Loly got closer and closer to me.

"_Disintegrate, you black dog of Rondanini!_" I chanted. _"Look upon yourself with horror and claw your own throat! _Bakudo #9: Geki!"

Loly suddenly froze in the air, giving off a red aura. She remained paralyzed for a second before falling to the ground in a limp heap, glaring at me intensely.

_Good, _I thought. _With the incantation it'll take a while before she can move again! _

I backed away slowly, eyeing Loly cautiously. Even though I had spelled her there was still a possibility that she could break through. I caught her struggling slightly but to no avail.

"Now's my chance," I muttered. "Bakudo #21: Sekienton (Red Smoke Escape)!"

I slammed my hands down onto the ground, creating a large explosion of smoke. Hopefully this would keep her from seeing which direction I went, but I wasn't too sure. Turning around I prayed that this would hurt me, and flash-stepped away.

_I'm…such a coward…_ I thought to myself. For once, Kuro didn't say anything. Not that it would have helped if she said anything.

I didn't like having to run away, but I didn't think I stood a chance against a berserk Arrancar like that. I had only one choice: search for help.

_You would stand a chance, if you took off the ribbons, _Kuro murmured, sounding exasperated.

_No, I won't! I refuse to jeopardize my current reputation! _

_Now you're just being petty, Aria. Stop acting like a child and start depending on yourself._

_Now _you're _just being hypocritical, Kuro. Weren't you the one that said I had to start depending on others?_

_That was different. _

_Sure, sure. _

I couldn't chat for long; I had to get away.

I knew there was only one person who could take on that venomous Arrancar: Captain Hitsugaya. I could sense his reiatsu coming from that direction. I had to get to him as quickly as possible, so I pushed my legs even faster, ignoring the ache they began to give off.

It was then that I heard a roar behind me. I grimaced; looks like Loly finally broke through.

"WHERE ARE YOU, YOU LITTLE BRAT?!" I heard her screech.

Her sudden outburst startled me and I lost my concentration for a moment. That was all it took before I was sent stumbling into the ground. The worst thing was that I was running down a hill, so I somersaulted and turned over dirty terrain.

"Ow, ow, ow…" I moaned when I finally stopped. Coughing up some earth in my mouth I slowly got off the ground and winced. Looks like I have scratches and bruises to add to that broken rib.

"At least I got down the hill faster," I muttered to myself, rubbing my aching back.

"Not that it helped you much," a sickeningly familiar voice said from nearby.

My eyes widened to their limit when the face of Loly appeared _right in front of my face, _her face contorted with rage.

"You thought you could get away, after what you did?" she whispered harshly. "Yeah right. Like I'd let my prey slip away that easily!" She raised her hand, preparing to strike.

Defiance caused my blood to boil. There was no way in hell I was going to let her get to me that easily.

"Get away from me," I hissed back. "Kisoku Bara!"

I pointed Kurobararyu straight at her and purple-black flames gushed out. The Arrancar's eye enlarged in surprise, and then the blaze hit her right in the stomach. Loly screamed as she felt the burn of my attack, which pushed her straight into a tree, shattering the bark.

When the flames died down her outfit was badly singed, though only a little skin was burned.

"You, you…" she wheezed, glaring daggers at me. Still feeling defiant, I leered back, determined to cow her. It was as though I was telling her, _Go ahead! Try me! _

I didn't have time to stand around though; although I wanted to stay I flash-stepped off, hoping those burns were enough to buy me some more time. In all that commotion I hadn't noticed my ribbons getting looser; I would tighten them later.

However my hopes were dashed, as something collided with my face, causing me to fly onto a large branch.

_How could she have recovered so quickly…? _I wondered, not really expecting an answer. I could feel a large bruise forming on my cheek from the kick. Loly suddenly let loose a battle cry and swung her leg for another hit.

Just in time, I reached up and caught her leg. Clutching it with the other hand I summoned my strength and hurled her away, making her crash into the ground. Using the little time I had I backed away, moving a bit closer to my target.

She leaped towards me again, this time holding what looked like a dagger, which looked a bit like a _tanto_ (a common Japanese single or sometimes double-edged knife). Was it her zanpakuto? I didn't have the time to think about it, as I moved my own sword in front of me to block the vicious slash she was about to give me. Using both arms I flung her away and aimed another Kisoku Bara at her. Dodging she jumped at me again, landing on the same branch, this time going for a straight-up stab from the side. I moved Kurobararyu into a vertical position and almost hooked Loly's weapon on the shaft. She pulled back, the dagger dragging on the ruby scepter, sending sparks. The moment she did, however, I swung Kuro to the left, striking the knife very hard. It made the effect I wanted; because of how hard I hit it she let it go, the dagger flying away and embedding itself in a tree.

Loly looked at her empty hand, incredulous, and then glanced back at me. And I couldn't help it; I flashed a grin.

"Wha…_Damn you!!_" she cursed. I jumped down from the branch, aiming a quick volley of flames at her. She was so angry that she actually got hit—I wasn't actually trying to get her. The Kisoku Bara seared a bit more of her outfit and she was forced backwards a bit. I took this chance to run again, flash-stepping again and again.

And of course, it didn't last long. Loly zipped past me with that impossible speed and stood, in a stance, a few feet in front of me. I readied my weapon, seeing as she had retrieved her own, but she didn't attack immediately.

"You…you think you can beat me?" she hissed in a low voice. Her pink eye looked like they were trying to burn right through me, but I knew a thing or two about glares myself.

"You think a kid like you can beat me? I'm not going to lose to some low-life Soul Reaper like you!" she spat. I twitched a bit at her comment—I liked being a Soul Reaper. "There's no way I'm going to lose to anyone like you! I won't! Not to you, not to Yammy, not that freak monster…I won't!" She laughed, the sound on the edge of hysterical. I backed away a tiny bit. "They thought I was dead, when Yammy smashed me into the wall, but I was still alive! So very much alive! After Aizen was defeated, I escaped and hid in the most desolate places in Hueco Mundo! And I'm still alive! I didn't come here to get killed by a piece of scum like you!"

_Aizen? Yammy? What in the world is she talking about? _My head was spiraling at her ranting.

_She's going crazy. Maybe you should slap her, _Kuro suggested.

_Right. You go do that now and let me know how that works._

Loly stepped toward me, her expression incredibly deadly. I stepped backwards and right away tripped from some rock.

_Shoot, _I thought desperately.

I tried to get up as quickly as I could, but I wasn't fast enough. The venomous Arrancar used that sonido technique and appeared right behind me. Before I could even look back she suddenly grabbed me by the arms and hoisted me up. I thrashed about, but all she held fast and cackled.

"Let's play a little bit more, brat!" she coaxed. Suddenly she grabbed my left wrist and began bending it at an impossible angle.

I screamed, thrashing even harder. "_Let me go! That hurts!" _I howled. But it only made things worse, as she jerked my hand even more relentlessly. I screeched and kicked about, trying to get her off.

_Quick, quick! Shoot a Kisoku Bara at her! _Kuro urged. I couldn't _do _anything though; the pain in my wrist was just too much. Loly wrenched it even further, and my bawls went even louder.

I didn't care if this was what she wanted. I didn't care if I ran. I just wanted to get away, away from her, before something _bad _would happen.

Loly cackled again right in my ear. "Having fun, brat?" she giggled. I could just imagine that sadistic smirk on her face.

"Get off me, get off me, _GET OFF ME!!" _I roared. I pulled one leg forward and swung backwards, my heel crashing into Loly's shin. She howled in pain.

"YOU LITTLE SCUMBAG!!" she screamed back. "LET'S SEE HOW YOU LIKE THIS!" Taking my hand in both hands and with all her strength and suddenly jerked it.

A sickening crunch echoed throughout the entire forest.

But it didn't last long, because the next thing the entire forest heard was my earsplitting screech. At this point my shrieks didn't even sound human any more. My arm felt _excruciating; _the pain sent adrenaline through my veins, and I thrashed around as if I had a seizure. Loly couldn't hold on any longer; my head collided with her mouth and she wheeled back, throwing me to the ground. And there I writhed in the intense hurt in my arm.

Even the plants were reacting. Many of them sprouted from the ground and flailed around, slapping the accursed Arrancar around.

_Aria! Aria, are you alright? Calm down, alright, just calm down! _Kuro repeated over and over again in my head.

_My wrist, my wrist, it's broken…_I whimpered.

_Yes, yes, I know. Just calm down, alright? Just…just get up and run, okay? _

I tried to rise, but moaned at the strong smarting in my chest as well as in my hand.

_It's okay, it's okay, Aria. Just put me in your other hand and get up slowly…_

I did as she asked and switched hands and rose. Somewhere in the back of my head, _way _back there, where there was still a shred of sanity, I realized this was a problem. I may be good with my hands and whatnot, but in the end I was still left-handed. I had never learned how to be ambidextrous. How was I supposed to fight with my less-dominant hand?

_Don't think about that now! Just run! _Kuro practically shouted.

Biting my lip I did as she commanded, the aching making my movements even more sluggish. I couldn't see clearly as well, as some tears had welled up in my eyes. Looking back, I was slightly satisfied that Loly was still preoccupied with the vines that I had unconsciously summoned.

"My wrist…" I sniffed. First my rib, now my wrist?! Some of my fingernails had been ripped off by once, but that was not comparable to this.

_It looks like it's a pretty bad break. Your wrist probably isn't the only thing broken; there's a likely chance there's a crack in your forearm…_Kuro mused. I cringed. It did feel like more than my wrist was broken.

I don't know how fast I was running, nor did I care. However due to the wind rushing into my face I noticed my hair ribbons loosely flailing. They were getting looser and looser with each passing second.

_Don't worry about that! Just run, run! _Kuro pressed.

At one certain point I was too emotionally and physically stressed to run any longer. I slumped onto a tree like a rag doll, sliding down with a groan. My unbroken appendage was carefully holding the cracked one, cradling it in my lap. I had absolutely no idea where I was, but I couldn't find out either because my head was buzzing like crazy.

_What are you doing? You need to get away! Hurry before—_

"Gimme a moment," I snapped, not bothering to think the words. My chest was rising up and down rapidly, but after a few seconds it began to move in a steadier pace. My grip on Kurobararyu was getting slack; I wasn't even holding it anymore: it was only propped against my fingers. Someplace in my head I knew this was wrong, but I just couldn't care right now.

All of a sudden I heard a rustle from some bushes nearby. My hand on my weapon suddenly tightened and I tried to shift into a defensive position.

_She just won't let up, will she? _Kuro groaned.

At this point I could feel real anger boiling within me. With the spelled ribbons getting more and more free the kido I put on it was also losing its effect on me.

I sneered at the rustling bushes, about to unleash a huge blast of purple fire.

_Do not fear…_The plants around me whispered. _There is no danger…_

_Huh…wha…? _

The bushes suddenly parted and out walked…a Soul Reaper?

He looked fairly young, with a tender face and short black hair with a slight cowlick in the back. A pair of black-framed glasses sat on his nose, magnifying his dark brown eyes. He seemed a little out of place in his shihakusho, shuffling about in an awkward manner. But when he spotted me his eyes widened.

"Oh wow! Are you alright?" he asked, immediately rushing to my side. I was too surprised by his actions to say anything.

_See? When it comes to the battlefield everyone is treated the same, _Kuro pointed out.

I shifted in my position against the tree, making a face at the shots of pain rushing through me. The boy looked me over with a critical eye.

"Whoa…You've got a cracked rib and a badly broken wrist… What in the world were you fighting to get injuries like this?" He didn't give me a chance to answer, as he simply continued. "I should heal you right now…"

I shook my head. "We have to get away right now…" I warned.

"Don't worry; I don't sense anything around. We're safe. What was your name again?"

I frowned at his lack of caution, but replied all the same. "Squad 10 Third Seat, Aria Miyamoto," I whispered.

"Oh, so you're the new third seat?" he asked, intent in his work. "I've heard some rumors about you, but I didn't believe them. The things people say these days…"

So people had been telling stories after all… Giving a small sigh I watched the boy try to repair my snapped wrist. Carefully he lifted it up and I whimpered.

"Sorry..." he apologized. I gave a small smile and gestured for him to continue. I liked this boy; most likely because he didn't believe those supposed rumors floating around about me, no doubt spread by my former classmates. I figured I should make some small talk, to keep my mind off the pain.

"What was your name again?" I asked. Actually, he never did say his name in the first place, but it was something to say.

"Huh?" he snapped out of his work.

"I said, what was your—"

A burst of reiatsu reached me and I jolted up, ignoring the shooting stinging. The boy looked up at me, puzzled.

"We have to get away from here," I hissed in a low tone.

"What? Why—"

"I've got you now, you little piece of scum!!" Loly shrieked, tearing through the bushes. Wrenching myself up I hauled the boy along with me.

"Hurry! We have to run!" I urged, already set in motion.

"A-alright!" He sprinted after me, trying to catch up.

"You can't get away!" the deadly Arrancar yelled. I could sense her coming closer and closer.

"Quick, quick, quick!" I pushed.

"Gotcha!' Loly snarled, appearing in front of us. I skidded to a stop, eyeing her fearfully. The other Soul Reaper stopped and his eyes widened at the enemy in front of us.

**

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***Grr..... I didn't like that chappie very much. Gosh I hate Loly.... But I read somewhere that she was actually still alive because Uryu saved her by pinning her to the wall with an arrow. I tried to find someone else, but there weren't any cool Arrancar that I could use. Think about it, if I used someone like Grimmjow (if he's even still alive) or Ulquiorra (which wouldn't work either since he's kind of dead *sniff*) then they would kill Aria off in one shot and be done with it. What kind of ending would that be?!?!?! And the three ex-Soul Reapers wouldn't work either for that very same reason. So I had to resort to Loly. Ugh. Oh boy, I hope I got her personality right.... it was so hard to avoid her saying her favorite insult... *sulks in corner*

**Aria: Umm....I don't mean to be rude, but where's Captain Hitsugaya? It's been ages since we've seen him....  
Me: You know...I don't really know. Don't worry, he'll make an appearance hopefully in the chapter after the next, if the plot bunnies don't get me, but I have no idea where he's been up to this point...  
Aria: Huh...**

**SOMEWHERE IN THE DISTANCE**

**Toshiro: No! Absolutely not, Matsumoto!  
Rangiku: But Captain~! It's important!  
Toshiro: No it's not!  
Rangiku: Ah, c'mon! You'll enjoy it! C'mon, let's do it! *grabs Toshiro*  
Toshiro: No, no, get off me! No way, Matsumoto! Put me down! YOU ARE NOT MAKING ME WEAR THOSE BUNNY EARS!!!!  
Rangiku: *giggles* But it'll be so cute~!  
Toshiro: NO!! GET OFF! MATSUMOTO!!! GET THOSE THINGS AWAY FROM ME!! WHA.... WHAT'S THAT STUFF ON IT?!?! IS THAT SUPER GLUE?!?! NOOOOO!!!**

**Aria: *shivers* I just got the chills...  
Me: Me too.... *shudders* **

**Oh! And one more thing! For this story, do you think I should use the English dub's version of Hyorinmaru's release command? Or the Japanese? I like both, so I can't decide! I'll leave it up to you!**

**Love it? Hate it? Desire to express your need for cake? Then press the green button and leave a review!  
**


	22. She Who Wields the Scepter

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***Ah....Finally done! Sorry guys, this didn't exactly come out a "couple of days" after my last chappie....This took a lot longer than I had thought. TEN FREAKING PAGES!!!! Stupid writing splurges.... Anyway I wanna give a big thank you and hug to my beta Mikomi-oneechan for looking at this and putting up with me spamming her inbox with my chapters! You deserve a box of donuts! Well, I can't sent them to you in any way, so you get internet donuts! Yay! And I haven't forgot all of my other precious readers either! You guys get ice cream cake! Or just regular cake, if that's what you prefer. Or something else. I don't know.

Also to make it easier on myself I put a poll onto my profile so you guys could vote on which version of Hyorinmaru's release to use in my story! I'll probably be leaving it there for a while so drop a vote! Oh, and before I forget, this chappie seemed unnaturally....gory to me than the others. And there are some tiny language issues since Loly here got TOed. Just a warning! Posted 8/31/09

**Aria: All set?  
Me: ... *dies of sheer exhaustion*  
Aria: Ummm...... That isn't good..... **

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"A-A-Arrancar?" he stuttered. He glanced at me. "Was she the one who…?"

I nodded gravely, backing away slowly. "We need to get to Captain Hitsugaya and the lieutenant!" I whispered to him.

"What are you whispering back there?" Loly snapped. Both of us cringed at the sound of her voice. "Great, now I'm stuck with two Soul Reapers. Just going to have to take care of this quick, won't I?"

I didn't like the tone she was using. It was like the tone she used when she first appeared: a sickly sweet manner that didn't fit that venomous aura she emitted. Just hearing it gave me the chills.

She took a step forward… and disappeared.

The boy behind me wheeled his head around wildly, just as I had done. I grit my teeth; no matter how much we did that, there was no way we could catch her…

Sure enough, I felt her appear behind me. I had only a second to turn my head before she punched me in the cheek, forcing me back and slamming into a tree again. Nothing was broken this time, but I had a huge bruise to my face added to my checklist of injuries. I bit my lip, trying to hold back groans.

It was when I heard another scream that I forgot my own pain for a moment.

My head snapped up and I was horrified to find that Loly was now tormenting the other Soul Reaper. That same sadistic smile pasted on her face, she drew her dagger and stabbed the boy in the arm.

"No!" I cried breathlessly as he shrieked. Her grin widening, Loly punted him into the ground and then hoisted him up by the collar. I tried futilely to get up and help.

Loly laughed as once again she dug the knife into the boy's flesh, drowning out his cries of pain.

"Please, don't… Don't hurt him!" I begged. I couldn't stand watching the kind-hearted boy get hurt. But my body just couldn't move; the broken bones wouldn't sustain. I gasped as I tried to rise quickly, but I had to keep trying.

Loly looked at me. "Enjoying this, brat?" she asked. She tortured me even more by twisting her weapon, still impaled in the Soul Reaper's body, eliciting blood-soaked coughs and screams from him. She roughly pulled it out and stabbed it into his shoulder, some blood bursting out.

"Please, please, please… Let him go!" I begged over and over again, my voice coming close to a sob. The Soul Reaper flailed as Loly impaled him continuously—though not in places that could kill him immediately, but still piercing him enough to give him great pain.

After a while, Loly's gouging slowed. I sighed in relief, but I didn't know if it was truly a good sign or not.

"Hmph. This is getting boring," she proclaimed. I almost stopped breathing, waiting for her next statement.

"I have an idea… Why don't I just kill you now?" she drawled.

I was frozen for a moment, paralyzed by the suddenness of it all. And then my heartbeat quickened, my breath coming out in ragged huffs.

"No," I mumbled. "No, no…" _No, no, no, no…!_

The boy, having heard Loly's declaration, struggled even harder, but with those wounds he couldn't move very much without losing a lot of blood.

Giggling, Loly threw him up a bit and punched him in the chest, causing him to cough up blood and go soaring backwards. She rushed after him with a maniacal grin and he looked at her with horror.

Everything seemed to move in slow motion then. I just couldn't tear my eyes away.

Loly drew her weapon back, pointing it below her waist. The look in her eyes chilled me to the bone. Tightening her grip, she pulled back and then made a ferocious diagonal slash.

I was helpless. My body refused to obey me, simply staying sprawled on the grass. Right before the dagger made contact, the boy turned his head at me and I could see his eyes. His brown irises were wide with fear, the pupils shrunken to a dot. He looked like a deer in headlights. It was a look that would haunt me forever.

A glint of metal, a scream, and then a fountain of blood.

Everything was numb as I watched the boy's body. He crashed into a tree and sunk down into the earth, a huge slash on his torso extending from his right hip up to his left shoulder, bleeding profusely… motionless.

Dead.

My mind was completely blank for a second, utterly shocked. And then the events started to slowly creep up on me.

_He's… dead…_

How… How could I let this happen? He was so kind to me… not believing the rumors that were being spread around… I never even got a chance to learn his name…

Loly landed softly next to the dead body. "Hmph. A waste of time." She turned toward me. "Now it's your turn, little brat."

Even as she advanced on me, I couldn't move. I just kept staring at that broken body not too far from me. It was so familiar, that sight…

It was just like before. Back at my old home.

Two bodies, in a pool of blood, dead. Because of me. Now was no different.

I should have told the boy to run, to leave without me… Maybe then he wouldn't have died. My fault…

My frame shook, but it wasn't fear that made me tremble.

It was anger.

Why… Why was it that everywhere I went, a trail of bloodshed followed me? It seemed as though death itself was my shadow, pursuing me and striking anyone that came near it. I was just so _sick _of it. Sick of everything! The fearful glares, the wounds that I unwillingly inflict, the hopelessness that engulfed me like a cloud of smoke…

Bright red energy began to seep out of me like steam as my breath quickened. Even Loly seemed to have noticed; I could tell her footsteps toward me had stopped.

_Why… Why, why, why, WHY?!_

At the last word, my reiatsu exploded. It was even strong enough to blow away my hair ribbons, allowing all my reiryoku to pour out in a fierce stream. My anger fed the energy; it grew and grew and didn't stop, causing strong winds to blow by.

"What the hell…?" I heard my enemy mutter.

Slowly, I rose from my position on the ground, my grip on Kurobararyu tighter than ever.

_About time_, she murmured in my mind.

"Wha—what the hell are you?" Loly asked, her voice dropping in volume.

I grimaced and my broken hand twitched in an attempt to clench into a fist. So many have voiced that question, all with one answer already in mind: a monster. But right at this moment, I was not the monster here. She was.

I didn't openly say anything; I simply glared at the Arrancar. She took a step back even as a shaky smile appeared on her features.

"Well, it doesn't matter," she began. "I didn't come here to get killed by lowly scum like you. Humans and Soul Reapers alike…" As she talked, her smile grew even more confident, until it was almost that malicious sneer that I first saw. My eyes narrowed.

"But you know, even though I know Soul Reapers are weak, that one over there,"—she gestured toward the boy's corpse—"seemed extraordinarily weak. Really, he didn't stand a chance! What a useless piece of garbage!" She flashed away and appeared right next to the body. "Ha! No fun at all!" And then she swung her leg back and kicked the boy.

I gasped and my reiatsu level spiked—not only at her actions, but at her words as well. Did she have no shame at all?! And how could she say those things? The boy was probably one of the kindest people I've ever met here. Kuro snarled fiercely.

And then, to my utter horror… she just _wouldn't_ _stop kicking. _With every blow, she seemed to enjoy it even more and more, to the point where she was giggling, tossing the boy's body around the ground.

"Stop it!" I yelled frantically.

"Why should I? I'm just having fun, that's all!" she cackled.

"You're… have fun… doing that…?" I breathed in disbelief. "How could…?"

_Because, _Kuro explained in a disgusted tone. _Because she is a true…_

"Monster," I muttered.

"What was that?" Loly asked, pausing her punts for a brief moment.

"Monster," I repeated, in a slight louder voice. "Monster… You're… a _monster_!"

Loly's eyes widened for a moment. "So what?"

"So what?" I shrieked. "_So what_?! You don't even care about causing pain to others?!"

"Not really," she replied nonchalantly. "It's all fun for me, anyway."

_It's all fun for me, anyway._

The words hit me like a wrecking ball, and with a feral growl I charged forward, stabbing my spear into Loly's shoulder. For a second she just stood there, mouth gaping open, but then all of a sudden she spluttered and screamed, trying to wrench the sharp weapon out of her body. I did it for her, twisting it out none too gently. The Arrancar screamed even more, blood spewing from the deep wound, keeling over in pain.

What had gotten into me? I was enraged like I was never before. Damn it, and I thought I had my temper under control… But just the thought of her kicking the Soul Reaper's lifeless body ignited my rage all over again.

Someone who actually _enjoyed _causing pain to others… Was that what a monster was? I still had doubts about myself, of course… but…

In truth, the word "monster" itself was one that I rarely used. Just because I… considered myself to be one… it doesn't mean I randomly flung the word around. It used to be something I described myself as and myself only. But Loly…

_Is a sadistic, venomous demon, _Kuro finished simply. _In short, she is the true essence of a monster._ She brought up memories of Loly's ruthless actions and words to prove her point.

Incensed, I pointed the purple bud straight at her and cried out, "Kisoku Bara!" With my fully released reiryoku, the flames came out even more powerfully than before, slamming her body away and leaving charred burns afterward. And then I just couldn't stop; I just kept shooting purple flames at her, over and over again. Sometimes they hit and sometimes they didn't. But the constant volley of fire made it almost impossible for her to get close to me.

"Monster, monster, _monster_!" I shrieked repeatedly. At one point I stopped shooting flames and that gave the Arrancar enough time to use Sonído and moved out of my shooting range. She materialized near me and shot her dagger towards me. Swiftly, I shunpoed back a few inches and again to Loly's left, swinging my speared scepter in an upwards arc, similar to the way she cut the boy. Her weapon was too small to fully block my attack, but it did manage to interfere with its path. The knife flew away again as I disarmed her and gave her a thin slash on her left abdomen. Screaming profanities, she hopped away.

I charged in again, knifing Kuro at Loly again and again. Looking equally outraged, she fluidly moved side to side to dodge my stabs. Kuro was a little slack in my grip due to the fact that I wasn't right-handed, otherwise I could have landed more hits.

But as time went by, I noticed how ineffective my attacks were. Sure, Loly was hollering curses at me, but I think it was more from irritation than from actual injuries. I took a closer look and perceived with surprise that all the wounds I landed weren't actually that bad.

_There was a name for that… _I mused. _What was it…Oh right! Hierro! _(_Spanish for "iron"_)

I cursed under my breath. Because of that ability, none of my normal attacks could land any decent damage… which meant that it would take a while before I could defeat her, even with my fully released reiatsu. Not to mention my dominant hand was utterly useless…

Loly rushed toward me, holding her hand out.

"Die!" she rasped.

Something red suddenly shot out and I barely got out the way. Unfortunately I wasn't quick enough and some of the attack grazed my left shoulder. It felt like someone had punched it. I stumbled off, gasping.

"Bala! (_Spanish for "bullet"_)" I wheezed.

_I think she's getting desperate, _Kuro mumbled.

Loly continued to fire red shots at me, which was definitely not fun. Those things were just so fast! Not to mention I think she had an aptitude for it—they caused large explosions whenever they hit the ground. I jumped back a few feet, aimed and then yelled out, "Kisoku Bara!"

Loly jumped back with a laugh. "Your aim's as bad as your hair!"

I frowned, but then grinned. "Don't be so sure," I murmured.

The purple-black flames may not have hit the Arrancar, but it did hit the ground close to her. Earth sprayed everywhere, sending some clots at Loly herself. She screamed as she seemed to get dirt in her eye.

"You little—! Where are you?!" she yelled, wheeling wildly.

_Good, now she can't aim as well, _I thought to myself. I took this chance and shot forward, jabbing Kuro at her. Loly continued to screech and began to fire Bala shots randomly. I yelped as I barely dodged a blast.

_Should've aimed for her arms instead, _I grumbled in the back of my head. But there was no changing it now. Narrowly dodging another red shot, I flash-stepped and appeared next to the Arrancar, striking her with my weapon. Loly leaped back, hissing. I eyed the injury I gave her and cursed.

_Damn. Just as I thought, I'm not doing that much damage at all. Even with my ribbons removed…_ _I can't keep this up forever. _Indeed, the battle was beginning to take a toll on me. Even with my ribbon-limiters removed my previous injuries were beginning to wear me down.

_I think I may have a solution, _Kuro declared. _But it's going to take some concentration on your part. _

I admit I was curious. _Okay, shoot. I'll go for anything at this point. _

_You're going to have to utilize the latest training method your Captain instructed you with. _

I thought about that and almost groaned. I hadn't completely mastered that part yet, but I'll just have to stick with it.

_Alright, if that's what you want, here's what you'll have to do…_

As Kurobararyu whispered instructions to me, I tried to keep another part of my mind on avoiding attacks from Loly. Still blind from the dirt attack, she continued to fire volleys of Bala in random directions, with more force than before. I winced when some shots hit the ground and sent dirt clouds up, which reduced my visibility greatly. My focus was tested to the limit.

After a few shots, Loly rubbed her eyes and finally cleared them, albeit being a bit bloodshot.

"I'm going to get you for that, you little brat!" She hollered. She Sonídoed and appeared next to her discarded weapon. She picked up the small blade and held it out in front of her. The moment this happened, I began to panic.

"I didn't want to have to use this on a lowly Soul Reaper like you, but it looks like I have no choice if I want to teach you a lesson!" she cried.

_No! _I shouted in my mind. I wasn't ready yet!

_Do it! Do it now! _

_Bu—but…_

_No buts! If you want to live, do it now! You can improve later! _

"Poison," Loly cried with relish. "Escolo—"

"NO!" I screamed, interrupting her. "I... won't… let… you!"

I pulled Kurobararyu in front of me. _Please, please work! _I pleaded to whatever godly force there was out there. I did my best to focus my reiatsu and opened my mouth.

"Youkou…" I hollered. "Oshaku!" (_"Carmine Scepter"_)

A huge blast of fire erupted from the sharp bud on my weapon, but instead of gushing outwards, it rushed downwards, completely engulfing the entire thing. The blaze slid harmlessly over my hand, and now Kurobararyu looked like a fiery javelin. Hardly any trace of the original redness could be seen through the fierce fire.

I marveled at the new form for only a second, because it was then that I realized how much concentration it took to maintain the fire. Grunting, I focused on keeping the blaze where it was.

_There is one major difference between Kisoku Bara and Youkou Oshaku, _Kuro said. _Kisoku Bara is simply giving off reiryoku, making the technique much easier to use. Youkou Oshaku, however, requires you to maintain the energy you give off in a certain area, forcing you to concentrate harder. You have to pull your energy into a certain spot, which is why I advised on using your training. _

I couldn't reply. I was too busy controlling the flames.

Loly gaped at my weapon's new form for a few moments. "What a pain you are…" she finally murmured. She still had her weapon out, and I appraised it cautiously.

_She's not going to…_

Loly smiled devilishly, as though guessing my thoughts. "It's time I killed you once and for all, brat. It was fun, but I'm getting a little bored now."

I panicked. _But I didn't have enough time…!_

"Poison," Loly cried. "Escolopendra!" (_Spanish for "Centipede"_)

She suddenly gave off a large amount of reiatsu, blasting fierce gales and dirt clods. I shunpoed back a few feet as a precaution.

When the dust cleared, my eyes widened probably to the size of dinner plates. Loly had now grown armor over her entire body, her arms growing into long, centipede like creatures. Her mask now covered both cheeks. And the reiatsu! By now I had mostly adjusted to her original state, but now it was like the time when I first saw her all over again… except deadlier.

She smiled viciously, noticing my surprise. "Now you're in for it!" she cried out. She swung one of her arms toward me, and I jumped up high in order to dodge. The massive, headless centipede suddenly collided with a nearby tree and I winced at the splintered wood. But that wasn't all that it did, however. I took a closer look and—to my utter horror—realized that the tree was actually _dissolving_; the place in the tree where Loly had hit had quickly eroded to nothing.

Standing in the air, I looked back at her in astonishment. Her grin grew.

"Surprised? Everything I touch will dissipate into nothing! My poison will erode your very bones!" She explained. And with that she aimed another swing at me, her long, armored arm moving in an upward arc. Shunpoing away, I tried firing some flames at her, only to quickly call them back because of my difficulty at maintaining the Youkou Oshaku.

_Damn, _I cursed. _Still don't have the hang of it…_

Loly laughed. "Now you're helpless, brat! You're really going to die this time!"

I scowled. "Like hell I will."

But what could I do? I couldn't control my new attack very well, but if I gave it up Loly's released form would destroy me. Gritting my teeth, I gave another go at maintaining the flames while battling at the same time, to no visible success.

_Try to pull all your reiryoku in, _I told myself. _All of it... No spills… _

The air whooshed around me and I squeaked as I hopped out of the way of another attack. Unfortunately, I wasn't able to completely get away, and some of her arm grazed my cheek. Immediately, I felt a burning sensation and I wiped my face on my sleeve, trying to get the poison off. When I was done, however, my face felt incredibly raw and sensitive. Just a mere breeze would set off a stinging feeling through my face. It felt as though a chunk of skin was missing.

"Again!" Loly hollered in delight. This time _both _giant appendages came soaring my way and I had to really concentrate to dodge. With all the debris flying about and the two of us attacking each other, I couldn't imagine what this would look like to a bystander.

Today just wasn't my day! Irritation was being added to my already boiling temper, causing my reiatsu to fluctuate wildly. It even got to a point to when Loly charged again I hit her arm with Kuro so hard that when it landed it created a small crater. My nerves were being frayed to the point where I could literally explode with fury.

Momentarily blind with rage, I jumped down and effortlessly swept my weapon across the surface of the armored arm, leaving a long, charred slash. Somehow, the poison didn't affect the scepter at all, probably because of the blazing shield.

Loly shrieked in pain and retracted her arm. With some distance between it and me, I shot a Kisoku Bara at the arm and this was the amazing thing: _the Youkou Oshaku stayed intact. _

_I've got it! _Kurobararyu burst.

_What is it now?! I don't have time for distractions! _I growled. Still in a bad mood, you see.

She ignored it and continued. _I know how you can control the Youkou Oshaku better! _

This put me in a better mood. _Well, spit it out already. _Slightly.

_No need to be snappy. You see, when you're angered, Aria, you usually concentrate it on a certain point, which is what makes you so deadly when you're in a temper tantrum. _

I chose to ignore that last comment.

_And…?_

_Don't you see? The Youkou Oshaku worked very well when you were angry, because it… Oh, never mind… I'm not one to give easy answers, so you'll have to figure the rest for yourself. _

Inadvertently, I growled in frustration and tried to force her to give me the answer, but she stubbornly stayed silent. But thanks to her statement, my head cleared a bit, and I thought about what she said.

The Youkou Oshaku worked well when I was angry… Anger made my mind focus on a certain point… I desperately tried to piece together all the details. In between dodging and doing some damage of my own, it wasn't easy.

And then, out of nowhere, I suddenly lost concentration for a moment. Something in the corner just seemed to catch my eye and I glanced at it. It was a flower, an amaranth, small red blossoms that sprouted from a green shoot.

_It's so small… Like the center point on a target…_ I thought randomly.

And that's when it hit me.

Kuro's explanation suddenly made sense to me. The Youkou Oshaku worked that one time because when I was angry, the anger automatically focused my mind on whatever was the cause of it. A target point. The amaranth was a suitable flower for this situation; the flower had always meant _fidelity, _and sometimes the word fidelity meant accuracy and exactness.

I needed a center point to focus on.

If I had an exact point to center on then it'd be easier to gather my reiryoku. All those other times that I tried, I just randomly pulled it in all directions, which split my concentration and made it harder. With only one point of convergence I could put all my energy in that one spot, and…

_Yes, yes, we get it! _Kuro exclaimed, exasperated. _Instead of splitting your focus into multiple parts, one point will easily do. _

_I just wanted to make sure I got it right. Clarify anything, _I defended. But she was right; I needed to get moving.

"Don't ignore me, you little midget!" Loly bawled. She veered both her limbs at me, hoping to catch me in the middle.

Leaping upwards, I landed in the air, not wanting her to hit any of the plants. Taking in a deep breath (which pained my rib greatly), I closed my eyes.

What to make my center point, hmm…? I guess the best one would be Kurobararyu.

_Not so fast, _she halted. _Perhaps you should try gathering your reiryoku into your body first?_

_Oh. Okay. _

My mind wandered for a moment. Where to focus now? It meandered some more and somehow ended up on the flower I luckily spotted earlier.

_Oh! I've got it!_

Smiling a little bit, I imagined myself as an amaranth flower. Small, red, and on the ground. A bit strange, but I was happy with it. I started collecting my rogue reiatsu, focusing on the flower. Slowly but surely, it began to recede.

_It's working! _I thought with delight. I had to stop that thought though, because the moment I thought that the flow stopped. Trying to calm my giddiness, I blanked my head and started over.

With a ferocious roar, Loly launched another deadly arm and I literally tripped on air and tumbled away. As long as it was away from those murderous arms, I was happy.

At last, I had gathered all my energy. It had taken a while, but at least it worked.

_Now to get it into my sword…_

I imagined Kurobararyu as simply one large point and tried focusing my reiatsu on that. It wasn't easy, so it went slower than trying to get it into my body. But I managed somehow.

With a roar, Loly began swinging her arms around randomly, not really aiming for me in particular anymore. My guess was that she thought I'd have a harder time to dodge random flailing centipedes than centered assaults. She was right to an extent. One arm would come in from one direction, and I would shunpo away. But then the moment I did, the _other _arm would be swinging around, and I'd have to dodge that, and so on.

However, because she didn't have a particular target anymore, there were times when she wouldn't be swerving those giant lugs you call arms at me, sometimes for minutes on end. I took that time to gather my stray reiryoku. And in time, I somehow got all of it in.

"Yes!" I exulted when I was finished. Tightening my grip on the fiery scepter, I carefully guided my energy throughout the whole weapon. And to my sheer delight, the purple blaze flared and flickered with more vigor than before.

Feeling exhilarated, I hurdled downwards, straight for a centipede-arm. Loly noticed.

"Ha! What's wrong with you, you weak little midget? Have a death wish?" she laughed. "Well I'll give you what you want!"She steered that appendage toward me with more force than before.

Normally, I wouldn't even dream about charging into an attack like that, but I was just so happy that I finally had some fine control over the Youkou Oshaku. As her arm ripped through the air, I readied myself and tightened my hand around my weapon. I was started to get the hang of fighting with my right hand.

Then, at the right moment, I swung powerfully and I could hear the sharp flaming bud cutting into the armor. As blood spewed out, Loly yowled and threw another centipede at me. In my haste, I didn't think and tried a Kisoku Bara without aiming. But then out of the opposite end of the purple bud flames flowed out and knocked the arm away. This was my cue to shunpo away.

Loly screamed and spluttered, flailing her injured limb around. I craned my neck and was glad to see a long, smooth slash along its side. As I watched, however, the blood flow gradually stopped and left numerous black edges.

_Oh! I cauterized the wound! And I can fire Kisoku Bara backwards! Cool! _The adrenaline was making me morbid. I think I was getting a little high.

"_It burns!! It burns!!" _the Arrancar screamed. "_What did you do, you stupid little—"_

Before she could finish her sentence, I jumped forward and stabbed my newfound power straight through the same arm, the wound quickly sealing up due to the flames.

"_GAH!! GET OFF ME, YOU PIECE OF CRAP!!" _She tried to wave her arm around, but it was difficult with all the slashes I put on it.

I tried to dislodge it, but for several moments Kuro wouldn't budge. At first I thought this was a bad thing, but as I watched, I noticed something strange. The flames from her steadily streamed out and started getting caught on the centipede; as it surged further and further, it started spreading faster and faster until the whole thing was a long, purple blaze.

_Huh, I wonder what's making it do that…? _I thought idly. _I know Kisoku Bara flames can burn a bunch of things, but why's it catching…? Oh! I know! The poison on her arms! _

Loly's wails shook me out of my musings, and with some force I wrenched my speared scepter out. For a few moments, I just stood in gruesome fascination as I observed Loly's appendage swerve back and forth in a failed attempt to douse the flames. Yup, definitely getting high.

_Focus, you gory buffoon, _Kuro snapped. _Now's your chance to attack!_

"What? Oh, right!" I charged again, only this time getting close to Loly's main body. With her desperate flailing, she didn't notice, so I got closer without getting intentionally assaulted by giant worms. I neared the base of the flaming arm, only a few feet off from where it attached to Loly's torso. It thrashed around, making it hard for me to land a hit.

"Stay still, you—Oh never mind!"

Without a moment's hesitation, I grasped Kurobararyu's bottom half, brought it above my head and ripped her downwards.

In one rough hack, the majority of Loly's arm detached, the leftover stump spurting out strings of blood. While there were some black areas, the Kisoku Bara flames couldn't incinerate the entire wound. The still-blazing heap fell to the ground with a resounding crash and after a few moments disintegrated to ashes.

A ripped, inhuman yowl blared through the night, and all of a sudden something large bashed the back of my head, sending me flying into a nearby tree. I didn't know which was worse: the burning sensation from my crown or the aching bruises on my back. I coughed up blood as I lay there.

"MY ARM!!" Loly caterwauled. "MY ARM!!! IT'S GONE!!! DAMMIT, DAMMIT, _DAMMIIIIIIT!!" _

As I scrutinized her from my position on the ground, I gasped as I watched her body began to expand rapidly, her sole arm growing to grotesque proportions.

_Her crazed reiatsu is going out of control! _Kuro shouted. _We have to get out of here! NOW!_

But it was useless. I was able to hold up fairly well up to now, but my body was officially at its limit. My breaths came out in wheezes and every fiber of my being ached, my broken bones especially. I didn't know if I couldn't move because of the pain or because my body just couldn't.

"_YOU'LL PAY, YOU LITTLE INSECT!! YOU'LL PAAAAAAYYY!!" _Loly roared, her reiatsu engulfing the entire area. If I could move, it would have only made it harder. Her body continued to swell, her arm and the stump monstrously bubbling into distorted shapes. Her armored body also began to bloat, resulting in nauseating gurgles and fizzy noises. Her bawls became less and less human until she was drooling and every time she bellowed saliva flew. I didn't know if I could even call her a Hollow anymore.

When she finally stopped swelling, my stomach rolled. The creature before me looked almost nothing like what I had been fighting before. Her armor was now swollen balloons that looked as though they threatened to burst. Her arms (if you call the stump an arm) were uneven and disproportioned, looking like genuine giant worms. Her face was horribly deformed—like a swollen fruit, only not appetizing in the least. Veins pulsed visibly and her eyes gained a crazed look.

"_Little, little brat!!" _she shrieked. I gagged at the sound of her voice. It had a fat, deep pitch that made me think of unpleasant, bubbling things. "_I'll make you pay for all that you've done! Die, lowly pest!" _

With surprising ease, she raised her remaining ballooned arm, though it was more difficult for her to walk toward me. My body convulsed, acting solely on instinct, trying to get away. But it was no use; my injuries made it impossible.

I couldn't describe the feeling that rushed over me then. How does it feel to know you were going to die? So many things in my head at once. Panic, despair, fear… I gave up. I was going to die.

Loly's distorted form finally came to a stop. She laughed, a sound even more unsettling than her voice. _"Goodbye, stupid Soul Reaper! You'll make a tasty snack when I'm done squashing your guts!" _The image that materialized was not a pleasant one.

She brought her oversized arm above her head, and I closed my eyes.

Cold wind blew in from the north, washing over my whole body. In a single, split moment my body lost all pain and my panic blew away. My head was clear and in that wonderful instant, I felt something land on my hand. I peeled one of my eyes open in a slit and took a look.

Ice.

"Sit upon the frozen heavens… _Hyōrinmaru_." an angelic voice spoke calmly.

Both my eyes shot open at that second and I watched in astonishment as a giant ice dragon came soaring out of nowhere and hit Loly square on, freezing a large portion of her body. She howled and tried to wiggle out of the attack, but the ice was spreading fast, covering most of her mass. The temperature around me plummeted and—despite myself—I shivered.

"Ri-chan!" another familiar voice called. To my great joy, I felt Rangiku-san's reiatsu near me and watched as she leaned over me. "Ri-chan! Can you hear me?"

I tried to open my mouth and reply, but remembering my unsettled stomach I chose not to.

Not expecting a reply anyway, Rangiku-san tried to hoist me into a sitting position. I groaned in pain as the motion disrupted my damaged rib. She stopped immediately and scrutinized me, reaching up and gently pressing the area of my ribcage. I whimpered and coughed up more blood, trying to hold back bile. She lifted my shirt slightly and frowned.

"Broken rib… Bruises covering almost every inch of your body… A burnt cheek… You're in terrible shape, Ri-chan," she muttered. Then she saw my right arm cradling my left and frowned ever further.

"And a broken arm… Damn that Arrancar."

Her words brought my attention back to Loly. Silently, my eyes swiveled in her direction and they automatically went to a figure standing in the air next to her. His white haori billowed in the air and his white head turned to face me. Like always, those icy, teal eyes were as sharp as ever.

Questions threatened to escape my closed lips. Why couldn't we contact him during the earlier fight with the Hollows? What had he been doing all this time? And despite the condition I was in myself… I wanted to ask if he was alright. To answer my last question, my eyes scanned him for any injuries. I was relieved when I saw that there wasn't a scratch on him.

The lieutenant caught me staring at the Captain. "Don't worry, Ri-chan. The Captain will finish this up nice and quick! We asked for a Gentei Kaijo (_Japanese for "Limitation Cancellation"_) because of all the Hollows and we kicked their butts, didn't we, Captain?"

Captain Hitsugaya ignored her and kept his eyes on me. "Hey," he began slowly. "Are you… alright?"

Impulsively, I opened my mouth to reply. Not a good idea.

The moment my mouth opened wide enough, my stomach churned and I turned to the side, throwing up. Rangiku-san gasped and patted my back, which hurt badly and only made me cough up even more blood when I was done. She stopped hitting my back altogether after that.

"… I'll take that as a no…" My Captain replied quietly. He turned back to Loly's swollen form, who was watching him intensely from her ice trap.

"I admit, I'm surprised to find an Arrancar here," he spoke. I had to concentrate to hear the words. "I thought all of you had retreated deep within Hueco Mundo. What could you possibly be doing here?"

"That's true," Rangiku-san agreed. I looked at her. "We thought all the Arrancar had retreated back to Hueco Mundo after the Winter War…"

"Winter War?" I asked quietly. Now that my insides had settled, I didn't have to worry about throwing up again.

She glanced at me. "Oh, that! Well, it's not something I'm allowed to tell you," she dismissed.

Loly growled and tried to rid the ice around her. "Why? Is it a crime for Hollows to appear in the world of the living? I felt some strong reiatsu coming from here and I just decided to have a look, as all Hollows do. It was as though something was luring me here. "

"I see. Well, if that's the case, then I'll have to kill you, just like any other Hollow," Captain Hitsugaya responded coldly. He hefted his sword to emphasize his words.

With a roar, Loly at last broke through the ice and faced the Captain. "Ha! I'd like to see you try! That little brat of a Soul Reaper over there couldn't defeat me! What makes you think you can do any better?" She flared reiatsu, which sent me choking for air due to my wounds.

"It looks like you don't know who I am… Not like there's any point in telling you." The captain responded by spiking his own reiatsu. His was so much heavier than Loly's; I could hardly breathe and was left gasping desperately for air.

"Captain!" Rangiku-san hissed. She was holding me now, and I couldn't help but feel sleepy… I was so tired… The pressure around me weakened a bit, but then everything just seemed to melt together. I couldn't tell one thing from another. First, there were blurs; fast, untraceable blurs. And other times I could see clearly, though at those times all I could see was ice. It was as though a heavy winter had descended upon this section of the forest. I shivered, and the lieutenant hugged me closer.

I tried my best to watch though, because from what I could see I was absolutely fascinated. Captain Hitsugaya seemed to fight Loly effortlessly, something I couldn't even come close to. When Loly swung her ballooned arm, he would easily shunpo out of the way and retaliate with incredible force. While their attacks were too fast for my worn mind to catch, I could usually tell what was going on by Loly's voice. Whenever she screamed, it was usually if she got hit. When she growled, it meant she missed. Sometimes she would cackle if she thought she had landed a hit on the Captain, but they were always followed by growls. I was in absolute awe.

At one point, an icy gust colder than any other swept by and it managed to wake me up. My eyes fluttered open and I watched in wonder at the scene in front of me.

Loly was still as grotesque as ever, only this time I didn't have to look at much of it because huge chunks of ice were covering her body. Captain Hitsugaya was still calmly standing in the air, sword in one hand and a mysterious chain attached to the hilt with a crescent shaped blade at the end.

"This has been going on longer than I wanted it to," he proclaimed softly. "I'm going to finish you off in one blow."

"Oh, yeah?!" Loly spat. "Why end the fun so soon, eh, brat?"

I twitched. I didn't mind being called a brat or midget myself, but when it came to my Captain…

"Three reasons," he replied, still as stoic as ever. Wow, he's so cool… "One, I have an injured subordinate that needs medical attention immediately. Two, if this goes on, your berserk reiatsu is going to cause a huge explosion unless I defeat you here and now. And thirdly… I don't want to look at the hideous face of yours any longer."

I started to laugh, but they soon turned to wheezes due to my broken rib. Rangiku-san did the laughing for me.

"Yeah! Deflate that fat cow, Captain!" she cheered. I snickered, which also didn't end well.

Loly looked thunderstruck, and then her face contorted in rage. "_You bastards!!" _she shrieked. Her reiatsu spiked again, emitting off her bloated body. With a ferocious roar, she raised her puffed arm and swung it at my Captain at a breakneck speed. I tried to shout out a warning, but it only ended up in coughing more blood.

I heard a quiet sigh coming from Captain Hitsugaya's direction and observed in pain as he easily shunpoed away from the attack. Out of the arm's destructive path, he spun the chain attached to his sword and threw it at Loly's appendage. It quickly wrapped itself around her arm, and as it did ice began to form around it. The Arrancar screamed and tried to break free, but Captain Hitsugaya held fast.

The ice swiftly covered the entire centipede, making it look like a giant Popsicle, only not appetizing at all. And in one speedy motion, the Captain yanked the chain and off came Loly's last arm.

It fell to the ground, shattering into hundreds of pieces. The owner of the arm screamed and writhed. I tried to cover my ears at the sheer volume. But, through it all, I still tried to keep an eye on my Captain. He held out his sword and pointed it at Loly's main body.

"You're finished…" he finalized. "_Hyōrinmaru_."

Ice shot out of his sword's guard and formed into another massive ice dragon. It blasted straight toward Loly, engulfing her with a shower of frozen water. She howled in anger and tried to struggle free, but she was no match for the powerful captain. The ice rapidly grew over her face, and then all was silent. All that was left was a repulsive ice sculpture.

I gaped at the sight. "Whoa…" I whispered.

Captain Hitsugaya leaped down from his position in the air, sheathing his zanpakuto. Good old Rangiku-san starting cheering like crazy and I was still staring in amazement. So this was the power of a Captain…

He walked toward us. "Quit your blabbering, Matsumoto," he ordered. "We need to get all the groups together and count casualties. Plus, we need to get a medic…" His eyes flickered toward me for a moment.

"I'm okay, really," I murmured, trying to sound reassuring. He snorted and turned away.

"How are her injuries?"

Rangiku-san eventually sobered up. "She's got bruises practically on every inch of her body, a few burns along with a badly broken wrist _and _rib coupled with some fractures. I'm surprised she's even still conscious."

"It's not that bad!" I protested, only to wince and sit back into silence. The Captain turned his stare fully on me.

"You just took on an Arrancar, Miyamoto. One of the most dangerous things you could ever fight as a Soul Reaper," he said coldly. "I'd appreciate that you'd take your wounds a bit more seriously and try not to move for the time being. What were you thinking? Taking that thing on all by yourself?"

I tried to answer, but now that the excitement had died down I was beginning to lose consciousness again. Black flickered at the edges of my eyes and I struggled to fight it.

"Never mind, we'll talk about this later," he said. "Contact all the groups, Matsumoto."

"Yes sir."

I couldn't tell what was going on after that, as my mind was becoming muddled. Rangiku seemed to be talking rapidly into something as well Captain Hitsugaya. I caught the words "medic" and "returning," but I couldn't get anything beyond that. Blackness continued to consume me…

_Crack. _

I blinked and looked around. _Where did that come from? _It was very audible, as though it was nearby. The captain and lieutenant seemed not to have heard it and continued to talk.

_Snap. Crackle. _

My eyes wandered until they set on the Loly-ice statue. I scanned it quickly and, to my utter distress, I found large cracks beginning to form in her ice prison.

_She just won't let up… _Kuro groaned.

"Um… Rangiku-san…" I called.

"Huh? Oh, don't worry, Ri-chan! You'll get help soon!" She wrongly assumed. She turned back to her phone. "No, no, don't do that! Once this mess is over, we can go back and have that drinking party I promised…!"

I frowned and turned toward my Captain, only to find that he too was on a phone. I wasn't sure he'd heed my warning either…

_Crick. Splinter. Crunch. _

I tensed and quietly grabbed Kurobararyu, who was surprisingly still in Shikai form. I hardly had the energy for this but I had to try. I focused my mind…

_CRASH. _

The ice suddenly shattered, exploding into millions of shards. Startled, Captain Hitsugaya and the lieutenant stopped talking and turned around. Loly was still in her berserk form, bearing many wounds across her ballooned body. She was back with a vengeance.

"_Dammit, dammit!!!" _she repeatedly cursed. "_I'll kill you! I'll kill you all!" _

"Impossible…" Rangiku-san whispered. The Captain scowled.

"_Damn you! Damn you all!"_ Instead of charging, she suddenly opened her monstrous month, stretching it to its limit. Out of nowhere, red beams of energy began to gather in her mouth of giant amounts.

"Darn it… I underestimated her… With her out-of-control reiatsu, that Cero is enough to destroy this section of the forest…" Captain Hitsugaya mumbled to himself, reaching for his sword.

Seconds later, Loly had a huge ball of red light hovering inches from her maw.

"_Hahahaha!" _she boomed. "_Now you'll pay! You'll all pay!! That hag, the little baby in the back, and you, the annoying brat in the front!" _She opened her mouth wider, and the red ball glowed even more fiercely.

"_Cer—"_

"You… kou… Oshaku…"

A javelin of purple fire hurtled straight at her, zooming past the captain. As it flew, it almost seemed to spin in the air, the blaze surrounding it blowing in a swirling fashion. Loly's eyes widened as the flying lance missed her attack by inches and then pierced itself straight through her forehead, embedding itself in the tree behind her and burning out.

All was quiet for several seconds except for my heavy panting. That attack had taken all I had; I really needed to sleep. My arm outstretched in front of me, I glared at her, ignoring the stares of the superiors beside me. A hole was in the center of her forehead, blackened from the heat.

At last, Loly's body began to fade away, just like all the other Hollows I killed before.

"_Damn… you…" _she hissed, before her head was dissolved as well.

"Goodbye… Loly…" I panted. I felt like I was going to collapse any second. "And one more thing… Don't you _dare_… even _think_ that Captain Hitsugaya… is an annoying brat…"

As the last of Loly's form dispersed, my arm fell, my vision flickered, and everything went black.

**

* * *

**

***Yeah.... Ending wasn't very realistic. But it was...dramatic? Yay for dramatizing? And I lied last chapter about To-chan's appearance. I wasn't thinking so I didn't get it right. In any case, like I've said before in my previous chapters my Japanese SUCKS. So if you have a better translation for my sucky Japanese terms feel free to drop one!

**And in case you're wondering, it is true that the amaranth represents fidelity, at least according to the site I found. Don't know if it's the universal representation, but oh well. **

**Loly: AAAHHH!! Get off of me, you piece of crap!  
Me: Um, Loly? Aria's....already off you.  
Loly: No, no! That's not what I meant! When she stabbed me, there seriously was a piece of crud stuck to my shoe! What the heck people? Pick up after your pets! *shakes foot*  
Me:*sweatdrop* I....see.....**

**Toshiro: Owwww....  
Rangiku: Your head wouldn't hurt so much if you hadn't ripped off those ears like that! Why couldn't you have left them on? They were cute!  
Toshiro: No they weren't..... I am never letting you put those things on me ever again....  
Me: Let's try sheep ears next then!!  
Rangiku: YEAH!!! I'll get the glue!  
Toshiro: What?! Wait, no, get away from me! I'm not putting those one!! You're me dressing me up!! ARRRRRGGGGG!!!!! **

**.....On that cheerful note, review please? I love you all! **


	23. Guardian Angel

*****I think there's something wrong with me... How long has it been since I last updated? I think about two months ago, yeah. Want to thank my lovely beta Mikomi-oneechan for putting up with my insanity. I can't thank her enough, lol.  
Note: This chapter isn't exactly a continuation of the last chapter. You'll see what I mean when you read it.**

**One thing: I really really really really really appreciate everyone faving my story and all that, I can't be thankful (and admittedly, flattered) enough. But I just want to say that I'd like it if you guys dropped a review every now and then, especially if you faved. This site is a good way for me to improve my writing, so criticism is completely welcome!  
**

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Tōshirō Hitsugaya stood on a tall hill, critically appraising the Soul Reapers beneath him. So far everything had gone smoothly. There were no casualties and the Hollows were no trouble whatsoever. Still, this was a mission… and he had to be careful.

"Captain~!" Rangiku sang. Tōshirō's expression didn't change even as he inwardly groaned. His lieutenant would always be trying to steer his attention from the task at hand during missions like this.

"What do you want now, Matsumoto?" he grumbled.

"Ah, don't be like that! You've been standing there for ages! If it weren't for your reiatsu I'd have thought you turned into a block of ice!" Rangiku laughed at her joke. "Why not have some fun? I brought sake~!"

"Put that thing away!" her captain snapped irritably. "Have you forgotten that we're surrounded by enemies? Don't set a bad example for our subordinates! We've got enough bumbling drunkards around here already!"

"Aahhh, that's too bad! Oh well! More for me then!" The busty lieutenant uncorked the lid and took a sip. Tōshirō resisted the strong urge to use shunpo and snatch the bottle away.

"Fine," he growled. "But don't come crying to me when a Hollow attacks and you're too far gone to do a damn thing about it." He gruffly turned back to the scenes below.

The young Captain watched as a Soul Reaper lithely jumped away from a Hollow's attack and sliced away half its arm. He saw another use a kidō spell and incapacitate multiple Hollows.

_So far, so good, _he thought to himself. While his eyes were on the subordinates down below, he couldn't help but let his mind wander to other places…

"Thinking about Ri-chan again, huh?" Someone said close to his ear. Tōshirō twitched, but didn't turn.

"What are you talking about, Matsumoto?" he replied evenly.

"I know you won't admit it, Captain, but you're worried about her… aren't you?" Her breath smelled faintly of sake. She backed away and took another drought of alcohol. "Don't worry, Captain Hitsugaya! I put her with Sawahata; he'll take care of her!"

He said nothing, but his worry had not ceased. Instead, he felt a strange feeling as his stomach seemed to clench. What was it about hearing that Sawahata was with Aria that made him feel a little… uneasy? Tōshirō knew he was an adequate fighter; that was how he got to be fourth seat in the first place. The strange thing was it wasn't that thought of Sawahata himself that bothered the Captain—it was the thought of him _being with_ his third seat.

_She has been out with him a lot lately… _Stymied, he furrowed his brow and tried to figure out what was bothering him, but to no avail.

"You're awfully quiet, Captain!" his lieutenant observed. "What's up? Thinking about Sawahata with Aria?" She suddenly gasped and started giggling. "I know! You're jealous, aren't you? Ha! I don't believe it! Captain Hitsugaya, _the _Captain Tōshirō Hitsugaya, is actually jealous! Oh, I never thought I'd see the day!" With each passing moment her voice got more and more wayward. She was definitely getting drunk. "Don't worry, Captain! I'm sure Ri-chan prefers you more anyway!"

"Shut up!" Tōshirō fumed. "I'm not jealous! It's just Sawahata that bothers me!" Which wasn't exactly a total lie, of course, but there was no way he was going to let his lieutenant get the best of him this way.

"Sure, sure!" Rangiku chortled. "You keep thinking that, Captain! Then one day Sawahata will ask Aria out and you'll just stand there wondering why you didn't do a thing! Aha!"

"Matsumoto…" Veins were popping on the boy's head like popcorn in the microwave.

"Who knows? They might actually make a good couple! I can see it now! He'll propose to her and then they'll get married! Aria would look so pretty in a wedding dress, don't you think? And I could be one of the bridesmaids! Oh, oh, and how do you think they'll kiss, Captain? He'd probably be a really a good kisser to keep Aria that long, huh? Maybe he uses tongue, he'd probably be really good with tongue, don't you think? They're probably making out in secret behind your back right now!"

"_Damnit, Matsumoto! How many times do I have to tell you to shut the hell up?!" _

***

Once Rangiku had managed to sober up a bit (after her captain was so angry he froze and shattered her sake) she and Tōshirō leaped down from their perch to change views. They wanted to check on all the groups and make sure there wasn't any trouble. They easily flash-stepped through the dense wood, treading on the large branches. At last they came into a clearing and examined the fights going on there.

"No problem here…" Tōshirō muttered to himself. "Let's move on."

They continued this pattern, moving along quickly so that they could cover all the clusters of Soul Reapers. As time passed, however, the young captain began to notice something strange. Each new group they observed seemed to be battling more and more Hollows. At some point he came to a stop along with his lieutenant, scrutinizing at a group fending off Hollows. His eyes wandered as he counted the group of monsters and he scowled when he came to a conclusion.

"That's more than the last group," he growled under his breath. His lieutenant looked at him with concern.

"Should we help?"

"No, not yet. They can handle this. Let's keep moving…"

It soon morphed into a pattern. The captain and lieutenant would flash step away to a different location, and each time they would notice that the number of Hollows were steadily increasing with each group. While this irked him, Tōshirō did not take immediate action. It hadn't yet got to a point where a captain and lieutenant needed to do anything drastic.

"Are you sure we shouldn't help them, Captain?" Rangiku asked anxiously for what seemed like the hundredth time. She, on the other hand, differed from her captain and felt that something had to be done.

"Yes, Matsumoto, we don't need to take action quite yet," he replied again. "We only need to assess the situation for now…"

"In that case, permission to contact and check in on other groups, sir!"

"Go ahead."

The woman pulled out her soul pager and pushed a few buttons before holding it up to her ear. It rang for several seconds and at last something was heard on the other end.

"Lieutenant Matsumoto? Thank goodness!" a desperate male voice cried. Rangiku could make out some kind of commotion in the background.

"Yes, this is Lieutenant Matsumoto. I'm calling in for a status report."

"Yes! Well, it's not going well!" He paused and the lieutenant could hear sort of slicing sound from the other end. "The enemy has surrounded us and we are currently fending them off, but for some reason there are an incredible number of them…"

Rangiku pressed the phone closer to her ear and strained to listen, as static began to muddle out the squad member behind it. Scowling she shook it in hopes that it was the phone's problem, but the sounds were still blurred out.

"Hello? Hello! Report!" she repeatedly called.

Tōshirō watched silently in concern as his lieutenant's frown grew. She scrutinized her phone and repeatedly shook it or did something along those lines in an effort to clear the interference. She could barely hear bits and pieces

"Grr… Stupid thing, work!" she growled. She rapped it several more times, and at last the static disappeared. "Finally!"

"Lieutenant! Lieutenant!" the same distressed voice repeated. "Please, we need backup immediately! The Hollows have multiplied to incredible amounts, we need backup right now! We can't hold them up for lo—No, no! Stay away! NO!"

The line was cut.

Rangiku held the phone at her ear for several seconds, frozen in shock. Suddenly something finally snapped and she began shouting into the phone.

"Hello? Hello? Are you there? Report, please! Oh no, no, no…" Still grasping the silent phone, she stared at her superior. "Captain!"

He was already in action. Extracting his own phone he turned it on, acting the tracking GPS function. Each yellow dot represented a group of Soul Reapers, the signal connecting to one or two of the group's soul pagers.

"One, two, three…" he counted. In the end he tallied up five active GPS signals out of the original six. Gritting his teeth he swiveled back to his lieutenant.

"Contact the entire squad immediately!" he ordered. "Make sure they know about the Hollows!"

"Yes sir!"

Rangiku had shaken off her alarm and was now dialing on her phone manically. Once she was connected she began talking at incredible speeds.

"Calling all members! This is an urgent message from Captain Hitsugaya and Lieutenant Matsumoto! Beware of large numbers of Hollows! Converge groups if necessary…!"

As she continued to chatter the message Tōshirō turned back to his own soul pager. Turning on the Hollow detecting function his eyes widened at the sheer number of red dots on the screen. They seemed to swarm the yellow dots like a swarm of bugs.

"Shoot," he muttered angrily. Punching in more buttons he quickly activated the function that allowed him to see which dot belonged to which pager. His eyes quickly scanned the screen and stopped at one point on it, disbelief coloring his usually stoic features.

Tōshirō cussed loudly and vehemently enough that Rangiku momentarily ceased her speed-talking and looked up.

"Captain…?"

"Why, why, why?! Why is it that she always manages to attract the most trouble? How is that possible?! I try to keep her safe by grouping her up with him, but she still goes on and attracts Hollows like bees on honey!" He uttered another oath before continuing his furious rant.

"Um, Captain…?"

"Take a look!"

He thrust his phone in front of her face and her eyes widened exponentially as she read the screen. Under a yellow dot in the north read the words, "Fourth Seat Sawahata."

And it was surrounded by the most red dots.

"Are you finished contacting the squad yet?" he growled. In silent shock she nodded mutely. "Good. Put that thing away and let's get a move on."

Wordlessly she obeyed and awaited the signal to move.

"Alright, let's m—"

He was stopped by a gasp from his lieutenant. "Captain, look out!"

Tōshirō felt the reiatsu and growled another oath. Grabbing his sword he swung it around and effortlessly cut the mask of an attacking Hollow.

"I don't have time for this," he snarled.

Unfortunately, he would have to make time, as three more Hollows followed up and made the mistake of engaging him in battle. His icy eyes flashing dangerously, he leaped up and sliced through their abdomens in a single swoop.

"Get ready, Matsumoto," he ordered.

Indeed it was then that what seemed like dozens of corrupted souls surrounding them. Tōshirō glared fiercely at them all—he had no time to deal with this.

"Finish them off quickly. We need to get there as soon as possible," he ordered.

"Yes sir!" Rangiku replied. Extracting her sword from her waist she held it horizontally in front of her and then slid her fingers across the blade.

"Growl, Haineko!" (_Ash Cat_)

The blade scattered into ash and charged itself at the small army of Hollows. What seemed at first glance as a harmless swirling mist was actually a deadly miniscule weapon as score upon score of Hollows were eventually cut down.

Tōshirō, too, was making good progress. While he didn't release his own zanpakutō his anger fueled his attacks and the landscape was soon covered in the bloody corpses of beheaded Hollows. As he waited for the last of them to disappear he took out his phone again and checked the screen, trying to pinpoint Aria and his fourth seat. According to the phone, they were still a ways off.

"Damn it all," he cursed. "I'm always the one that has to get her out of trouble." He was interrupted by a small Hollow that resembled a gargoyle. Tōshirō made short work of him.

"Child's play," he muttered. (Which, if you thought about it, was a bit ironic.)

Rangiku had dispatched the last of the beasts and approached her captain, her sword sheathed.

"All Hollows in the vicinity have been destroyed, Captain," she informed. He nodded in response.

"Good. Let's get a move on."

At last they flash-stepped away, into a densely wooded area. Dodging overhanging twigs they expertly jumped on thick tree branches. A phone rang as they ran, and Rangiku took out hers. She grimaced.

"We've got trouble up ahead, Captain," she warned.

At this Tōshirō growled profanities under his breath but didn't complain all that much. He still wondered at the sheer number of Hollows though.

_There weren't this many in the reports, _he thought. _Something's wrong here. _

He decided to investigate this matter another time as he sensed several presences nearby. Many of them belonged to Soul Reapers but there also seemed to be an equal number of Hollows. Tōshirō's mouth pulled back into a sneer as they quickened their pace.

The first thing they heard were loud moans, and then they heard metal clashing. Voices gradually became louder and louder as they neared their target. Rangiku futilely tried to contact them with her phone, but the signal was suddenly full of static.

Something large suddenly blurred past the pair and crashed into a tree behind them. Abruptly they stopped and realized in horror that the form was the body of a Soul Reaper, his blood steadily trickling down the tree like a dark secret.

"Captain!" voices began to shout. Several scruffy Soul Reapers appeared before him, scratched up in several places, many of their uniforms hanging in tatters, but otherwise looked uninjured. Tōshirō's turquoise eyes quickly scanned the crowd and were disappointed at not finding his third seat, but quickly turned his attention back to the Soul Reapers that were actually present.

"You, you and you! Go help him and get him some emergency first aid!" he barked. The addressed Soul Reapers scampered away to help their fallen comrade. "And I need a status report!"

"Sir!" A Soul Reaper stepped forward. "We were destroying Hollows just as you ordered us to, but out of nowhere a huge number of them began to attack us. It was more than we could handle, sir, and we had to merge groups and pull back for the time being."

"Is that all?"

"Yes. We fought the Hollows for a long time."

"Any casualties?"

The addressed shook his head. "None so far, sir, thank goodness."

_That's the best news I've heard all day,_ the young captain thought. "Alright then. Here are your new orders. Contact all other squad members and rendezvous at a certain point. You should have a better chance of handling the Hollows that way. Pick up any strays, should you find any. The lieutenant and I will gather the groups as well." He remembered that the signals were jammed and elaborated. "Use kidō to signal others if you have to."

"Understood. And what will you be doing, sir?"

He gritted his teeth. "We'll be cleaning up."

As soon as the injured Soul Reaper was in a stable condition the Squad 10 Captain sent the whole group off, leaving him and Rangiku alone.

"Captain," the lieutenant called. "I still can't get a signal at all. We can't communicate with the other squad members this way. I can't even contact the Soul Society."

Feeling frustrated, Tōshirō muttered low oaths through clenched teeth. _It's not normal for our communication to be blocked like this. Is something jamming our signal? _

"We'll just have to summon them through kidō," he huffed. "If only we had some Hell Butterflies…"

While his lieutenant began firing kidō spells into the air to act as flares, Tōshirō extracted his phone again and examined the screen. Red dots were still scattered far and wide but he could tell that their numbers were very slowly dwindling. When he watched the yellow dots, he noticed something.

_I can still get a signal from their locations. _

It was an odd occurrence to him, since he had assumed that whatever was jamming their communications would block all of them, not just the ones that would enable them to speak with each other.

_It's as though they don't want us to relay information with each other._

His brow furrowed. If the yellow dots were showing up then they either didn't care about them or they just didn't think that specific locations would matter. With the attacking Hollows keeping everyone preoccupied simply knowing everyone's location wouldn't help very much without well, thought-out coordination. And that involved speaking with each other through some means.

_To be able to pick out a specific signal like that… Something...No, some_one_ must be interfering on purpose. They might even have something to do with the Hollows._

Whoever was doing this had thought this out well.

Still, he wondered why they didn't block the location signals as well, just as a safety precaution. Even without a direct means of communication it was still possible to regroup.

_What are they getting at…? And for that matter, who are _they_?_

Knowing that there were more important issues at hand, Tōshirō shoved the matter in the back of his head for the time being.

Once Rangiku had finished sending up enough flares she and her Captain decided to return to the rendezvous area themselves, thinking that everyone would be able to see the signals the lieutenant had just fired. However Tōshirō wore a more-than-usual stern expression on his face as he brought up the thoughts he had figured out a few moments earlier.

"Ah, don't be such a stick in the mud, Captain!" his lieutenant called cheerfully. "My kidō's fine! They were so bright they could practically be fireworks! You know, I should really join a fireworks committee or something…"

Tōshirō tuned out Rangiku's chatter with practiced skill and continued his musings.

_Why would they leave out the yellow dots? Surely if they were capable enough to jam our direct communications then they'd be smart enough to block out those signals as well…_

And then, out of nowhere, he sensed its reiatsu.

It was only for a brief moment, but in that instant he immediately knew what it belonged to. Memories from the past year automatically came flooding into his mind.

_A man with bone white claws and a long, spiny tail behind him. _

_Blood splatters and bursts of unusual reiatsu. _

_A hulking figure breaking out of an encasement of ice. _

_A man with an androgynous face spouting eight tentacles out of his back._

_A dark-skinned woman mercilessly slashed across the abdomen. _

He blinked in shock as the details began to dawn on him.

"Arrancar…?" he muttered. "Impossible…"

Rangiku had felt it as well. Abandoning her free-spirited nature her expression became gravely serious as she looked toward the direction she felt the pressure from.

"Captain!" she called.

"I know," he replied, his voice coated with ice. "We need to get all the squad members safely back to the Soul Society!" _What could an Arrancar be doing here? I thought they were eradicated during the Winter War! _

Thankfully he could tell that the Arrancar did not have extraordinarily high levels of reiatsu, which meant it was probably a Números.

_We'll take care of this shortly. _

Rangiku tried desperately for several minutes to contact the Soul Society but as always all she could hear was static and occasional bits and pieces of voices. However she couldn't make out a single sound and she shook her phone in frantic frustration. Tōshirō could feel another reiatsu fluctuating with the Arrancar's reiryoku, but the latter's energy was making it hard for him to identify whose it was.

"Still no signal?" he growled.

His lieutenant shook her head, ragged phone in hand. "Still nothing. I can get bits and pieces but it's just no use."

"Damn. Well we'll just have to—"

A rustle was heard nearby, and the two Soul Reapers immediately tensed. They eyed the area that it was coming from, prepared to strike at a moment's notice.

A tall bush parted and out popped a spluttering Soul Reaper.

"Captain! Captain!" he cried out. His eyes wheeled wildly until they finally spotted the staggered superiors.

"Fourth Seat… Sawahata…?" Tōshirō choked out.

It was indeed the fourth seat. He looked just like the platoon of Soul Reapers, sporting numerous scratches and other small injuries. His electric blue eyes looked panicked as he rushed over to his two superiors.

"We've got trouble! Serious, serious, trouble!" he spouted, his expression alarmed.

"I'm well aware of that, Sawahata," Tōshirō replied in an ominous tone. "A highly dangerous kind of Hollow has just appeared. I want you to evacuate your team immediately."

"That's what I'm here for!" he nearly wailed.

The stoic captain blinked as what the fourth seat just said registered to him. He glanced behind him and something clicked.

"Where in world _is _your team, Sawahata?" he growled through clenched teeth.

The addressed Soul Reaper immediately grimaced and fidgeted in discomfort. Tōshirō glared at him fiercely, as if he wanted to stab the truth out of him. The expression _if looks could kill _briefly ran through his head.

"Well, um… I kind of…left," he explained reluctantly.

Tōshirō twitched. "May I ask why?"

"There were a bunch of Hollows that we didn't get to, so I decided to go…"

"Sawahata," his captain uttered in a low, dangerous voice. "If you don't recall, I specifically said to _stay together, _did I not?"

Sawahata fidgeted. However the captain exhaled in a sharp huff and his turquoise eyes grew less sharp.

"I'll deal with you later… For now I'm just thankful if everyone gets out alive…"

"Ah, yeah, about that…"

The Captain's eyes wheeled back toward his subordinate. "What is it now?" he asked, exasperated.

"The Arrancar… You haven't noticed?"

"I'd appreciate it if you just said what you wanted to say straight out, Sawahata!" Tōshirō snapped, on edge. The night was beginning to take a stressful toll on him. He could feel the beginning effects of a bad headache coming on.

"Well, I was coming back to the group when I felt the Arrancar's reiatsu, and then almost immediately I felt another aura and it—"

The boy suddenly stopped, as another burst of reiryoku swept over them. His eyes turned panicky again and his head swiveled around to where the waves were coming from. At first Tōshirō and Rangiku straight away assumed that the waves were coming from the Arrancar, but they realized that it wasn't a Hollow's. It seemed more like a… Soul Reaper's.

_Whose does it belong to though? _He wondered. The Arrancar's reiryoku was still clouding the other. Tōshirō concentrated hard, his brow slightly furrowed, until at last, he came to a conclusion.

"Oh my…" Rangiku choked, having realized who it was as well. "Aria…"

"_DAMN!_" Tōshirō cursed vehemently. The other two Soul Reapers jumped at the sound of his hard voice.

"What the hell is she doing?!" he continued to rant to himself. "That stupid, idiotic, stubborn girl! Why in the world is she fighting that thing?! She doesn't stand a chance!"

"She probably feels like it's her duty, Captain," his lieutenant muttered.

"Her duty my—" He cut himself off, knowing that his fuming wasn't going to help anyone.

_I'm going to have to do something about that temper of hers… If that Arrancar doesn't kill her than I will once I find her. _

The fourth seat shifted, uncertain of what to do.

"Make yourself useful and gather your team. Get to the rendezvous point—you can find it by following the trail of reiryoku from the other squad members," he snarled, unintentionally aggravated. The fourth seat nodded meekly before flash-stepping away.

"I'm going to kill that girl, I swear I will," the Captain murmured. Rangiku twittered in protest behind him but quickly ceased.

"Keep trying to contact the Soul Society, Matsumoto," he ordered. "It can't be gone forever. We need a Gentei Kaijo."

"Sir!" Despite developing a petty hatred over her phone Rangiku dutifully fished out her phone and started dialing once more.

The two quickly went on the move, rushing to where the Arrancar was located. They felt several reiatsus belonging to Soul Reapers and Tōshirō was pleased to notice that they were all headed toward the rendezvous point. Strangely the Hollows seemed to disappear, with the exception of a few weak ones left behind. The Captain puzzled over this but realized that they had all fled from the ominous reiatsu of the Arrancar.

Waves of reiryoku kept bursting spasmodically and the two of them hurried even faster. This time Tōshirō could easily sense Aria's spiritual signature mingling with the dark aura of the mutated Hollow.

_Don't do anything reckless, _he pleaded in his mind. _Just wait until we get there! _

He couldn't quite understand why the thought Aria getting hurt was so repellant him. A strong sense of protection had settled within him and his resolve solidified. His previous emotions of anger toward Aria's rash actions had dissipated, though some of it still lay in the back of his mind. Tōshirō didn't see where these emotions came from, but he pushed that matter away.

_I don't know why I feel like this… But all I know is that I have to protect her! _

As they neared the Arrancar's location the unusual reiryoku began to weigh more and more heavily upon the two Soul Reapers. Tōshirō's mind inadvertently flashed back to the Winter War. Memories of the powerful, evolved Hollows dashed through his mind, but he shook them off in order to avoid being distracted.

Meanwhile, Rangiku was still getting no headway in contacting the Soul Society through her soul pager. The phone was fraying the last of her nerves that night and she vowed that the moment they returned to the Seireitei she would hurl the accursed device at the nearest wall. The scratchy cacophony the speaker was emitting was beginning to grate against her ear drums but she refused to give up, knowing that she could get a connection any moment. Though to say that she wanted to murder her phone painfully and slowly was an understatement…

However, just as her provocation was reaching its peak, the static seemed to clear intermittently and something could be heard on the other end. Rangiku pressed the phone to her ear intently in hopes of catching something.

"H-h-l-m-h—"was all that could be heard at first.

"Hello? Is anyone there?" she yelled into the phone.

"Lieu… moto…"

"Hello? Hello?"

"Lieutenant Matsumoto!" a relieved voice cried out.

Rangiku was so happy she could just hug herself.

"This is the Technological Bureau, calling in! We've been having trouble in contacting you but we've finally managed to clear the interference! I'm not sure how long it'll be before we're cut off again, but we just wanted to alert you that there is an Arrancar in your immediate vicinity!"

"Yes, we're already aware of that! I'm calling in to ask for a Gentei Kaijo!"

"Understood. The preparations should be done right away!"

Rangiku waited for a few moments. Even after the Winter War the Gentei Kaijo authorization process had been kept simplified, however it wasn't as simplified as it was then.

The voice was back again, only it seemed scratchier than before. "We've authorized the process! However, since there is only one Arrancar, I can only let one of you go through with the process."

The lieutenant frowned, but she knew they were right. A single lieutenant or captain could easily take out one Arrancar while fully released. There was no need for any excess reiatsu that might risk influencing the environment.

"Hang on one moment," she said into the phone. She placed her hand over the speaker out of habit and addressed to her captain, "Captain, he says that he'll only authorize Gentei Kaijo for just one of us. Any preferences?"

Tōshirō was glad to hear that communications had momentarily cleared up, but he didn't exactly like the fact that only one of them could have their limiter released. However he knew the reasons and made his decision.

"I'll do it," he replied quietly. "You take care of Miyamoto while I take care of the Arrancar."

His lieutenant noticed the lack of an honorific and mentally winced, thinking of how angry her superior must be at Aria. However she nodded and relayed his wishes into the phone. Moments later Tōshirō could feel his limiter being removed and his reiatsu set free. He gave a quiet sigh of content as he felt his energy being liberated. While the limiter wasn't harmful, it was uncomfortable sometimes and especially weighed him down when he was fighting in the world of the living.

Once Rangiku confirmed the release was initiated she began to speak rapidly in the phone, asking what was wrong with the connection.

"We don't know! We think someone is jamming them on purpose!" he explained. "We've trying to clear it up but whoever's doing this is very skilled. We think—"

At this moment the man's words were hazed by a moment of static and the lieutenant clutched her phone.

"Hello? Hello?"

"Breaking…Can't hold…"

And then the connection went dead.

The strawberry-blonde woman's frown deepened, but she knew there was no use in trying to get another connection. They were lucky enough as it is.

Her thoughts were interrupted when they felt several flares of strong reiatsu and Rangiku could detect Aria's among it.

_We're so close, _she thought.

As they neared their destination both Soul Reapers could hear echoing crashes and screams of pain and anguish. A strange kind of whooshing that usually associated with fire also mingled with cacophony. Tōshirō prayed that the screams did not belong to his third seat.

However, the reiryoku of the evolved Hollow seemed to suddenly morph. While it still had the ominous feeling of any Arrancar's, it almost seemed to feel even more grotesque and berserk. The waves increased and their monstrous nature grew, wavering and fluctuating like a wild animal. It gave off as a mini-explosion and sent shock waves pulsing through the forest, startling even the captain and lieutenant. It lumbered upon them, totally out of control.

Both captain and lieutenant fretted about it. _It's gone completely berserk, _Tōshirō thought. An Arrancar by itself was dangerous enough, but one with wild reiatsu? Utter suicide.

_Damn! No! _Tōshirō screamed mentally. He picked up his pace, his breath coming out faster and heavier. A circle of light illuminated the dark forest up ahead, and both veteran Soul Reapers pushed themselves until the finally reached it.

Bright moonlight suddenly flooded their eyes as they exited the dense forest. They leaped into the air, silhouetted against the starry indigo sky and then saw the gruesome sight.

It was indeed an Arrancar, to put it roughly. Its misshapen form stuck out in the elegant night like a black blot on a white piece of paper. It _looked _like it was female, but her body was swollen almost like a balloon so it was difficult to tell. She sported broken and burned pieces of armor that were grossly stretched over her body. She had a long worm-like arm while the other was missing; the only thing left a badly burned stump. She was screaming oaths at the air and at first Tōshirō could not who she was yelling at, until Rangiku gave a gasp and pointed at the ground.

His eyes swiveled and his turquoise eyes widened. Lying crumpled on the churned up ground was his third seat. She lay on her side, so he couldn't see her face, but from the way she was positioned it looked like she was greatly pained. Her arm was skewed at an awkward angle and her long white hair covered most of her curled up body. The Captain was disturbed to realize that her reiatsu seemed extremely weak; it didn't have that unique wildness to it as usual. In quiet panic he glanced back at the bloated Arrancar.

"_I'll make you pay for all that you've done! Die, lowly pest!" _With surprising ease she raised that fattened arm and hovered over Aria. Her crumpled form shuddered but otherwise made no other movement.

"_Goodbye, stupid Soul Reaper! You'll make a tasty snack when I'm done squashing your guts!" _

Her arm neared Aria's slumped form, drifting dangerously overhead.

_No!_

In a split second Tōshirō jerked himself forward, pulling himself into action. His hand reflexively reached for his sword's hilt and he pulled it out effortlessly. He sensed Rangiku moving in action along with him, but it was very vague. All he could concentrate on was getting that _thing _away from Aria.

Even before he activated his zanpakutō's power, his reiryoku flared and sent cold gusts in anticipation in all directions. Small flakes of snow began to fall daintily from the sky along with tiny shards of ice.

"Sit upon the frozen heavens," he uttered in a low, deadly tone. "_Hyōrinmaru."_ (Ice Ring)

At his command, a huge fountain of ice sprayed from his guard, extending along his blade to form into a massive Chinese ice dragon with ruby red eyes. With a growl he swung his blade in the Arrancar's direction and with a ferocious roar the dragon flew toward its target and collided square on, huge chunks of frozen water spreading and engulfing her entire monstrous form. He stood in the air close by, knowing that she would break free.

Out of the corner of his eye he watched in relief as Rangiku reached Aria, hoisting her up. While he couldn't see all that well, he could tell that she wasn't in the greatest shape. Anger spiked and his glared turned even icier.

_What was she thinking, fighting that thing by herself? _He thought in cold fury. He would have a serious talk with her later, probably with a severe reprimand as well. That girl seriously needed to know what was dangerous and what was not. However, he couldn't help but feel relieved at the thought of finding her alive. If she had been killed…

Tōshirō heard Rangiku chattering to the third seat, wanting to cheer her up. He turned his head and was surprised to find her emerald gaze boring into him, despite her injuries.

_That gaze…_

He couldn't help it. He had to ask.

"Hey…" he started. "Are you…alright?"

She opened her mouth quickly, impulsively, but all of sudden turned to the side and vomited. Rangiku patted her back frantically but stopped when she realized that Aria was coughing up blood. Tōshirō stood there, shocked. More anger threatened to bubble to the surface, but with skilled practice he kept it under control—for now.

"…I'll take that as a no…" he said as calmly as possible. However, his mind was churning.

_I'm going to kill that thing._

With solid resolve he turned back to the Arrancar, still covered in ice but the head still visible.

"I admit, I'm surprised to find an Arrancar here," he admitted. "I thought all of you had retreated deep within Hueco Mundo. What could you possibly be doing here?"

The Arrancar scoffed. "Why? Is it a crime for Hollows to appear in the world of the living? I felt some strong reiatsu coming from here and I just decided to have a look, as all Hollows do. It was as though something was luring me here."

"I see. Well, if that's the case, then I'll have to kill you, just like any other Hollow." He shifted himself into position, ready for a fight. The Arrancar, with a defiant roar, shattered the ice cage and snarled at the Captain.

"Ha! I'd like to see you try! That little brat of a Soul Reaper over there couldn't defeat me! What makes you think you can do any better?"

Tōshirō sighed. Everyone just seemed to underestimate you when you were… underdeveloped.

"It looks like you don't know who I am… Not like there's any point in telling you."

He raised his reiatsu, obviously meant as a threat. Unfortunately he forgot about his injured subordinate and earned a jab from his lieutenant.

"Sorry," he muttered, momentarily glancing at Aria's limp form before quickly flash-stepping away as the Arrancar swung its bloated arm at him.

"_Die!" _she shrieked, launching her solitary upper limb at the young Captain. He dodged with ease, noting the slowness of the attack because of her size. But as the appendage swung past him and collided with the churned soil he noted coolly that the grass around the area of collision seemed to dissolve away into nothing.

"_I'll dissolve you into nothing! My poison will eat your measly bones away, Soul Reaper!" _she screamed, swinging her arm around wildly.

Easily evading the random attacks Tōshirō flash-stepped high above the Hollow's head, his form darkened as he stood in front of the moon. Wheeling madly the Arrancar growled profusely until her contorted head moved upwards, at last spotting the white-haired boy.

"_Get down from there so I can kill you!" _she hissed, apparently unable to reach that height.

_Yeah, right. _

Tōshirō grasped the chain at the end of Hyōrinmaru's hilt that had materialized when he released him. The crescent shaped blade at the end glinting in the pale moonlight, he swung it with practiced simplicity, tossing it toward his enemy's head. Surprised, she tried to lurch away but because of her sheer mass she could hardly move her oversized legs. The silver chain wrapped quickly around her swollen neck and with a powerful tug Tōshirō sent her face smashing into the dirt.

The Arrancar spluttered and spat, cursing the powerful captain fervently. She tried furiously to get up but the chain held her fast. Using this chance Tōshirō grasped his sword in both hands and sent a cascade of frigid ice along the length of the metal, shattering against the Hollow's cranium. She screamed as the sharp ice shards made contact with her face and with a loud grunt managed to push herself off the ground, yanking the chain off. With a groan she swung her engorged centipede arm at Tōshirō, this time actually aiming for him.

Not cowed by the Arrancar's ferocity Tōshirō again disappeared, but only just before the arm came in contact with him. She cackled, thinking that she had hit him, only to be shocked as the agile Captain reappeared behind her. He held a finger to his lips, his glare cold.

"Bakudō #63: Sajo Sabaku (Locking Bondage Stripes)," he muttered. As he swept his arm away from him a glowing yellow chain shot out from his hand and impossibly wrapped themselves around the Arrancar, causing her to scream and hiss in anguish. He slashed Hyōrinmaru downwards, another blast of ice shooting from the hilt and engulfing the bound beast. Fragments of the attack remained on her grotesque shape as she tried to shake it off.

She suddenly gave a vicious roar, and a flare of berserk reiatsu emitted from her. The sudden burst of power caused the kidō spell to disintegrate and fueled her attack behind another one of her swings. It was too fast to dodge so Tōshirō swiftly shifted his sword into a vertical position, the Arrancar's plated limb colliding with a screech of metal that sent sparks flying. With a malicious guffaw the Hollow pushed the boy aside, causing smoke to fly up.

When she stopped Tōshirō was still holding his ground, his sword slightly shaking in an effort to keep her arm from overtaking him. The Arrancar laughed again.

"_You're mine now, Soul Reaper!" _she spat. "_If only that little brat over there hadn't cut off and burned my other arm then you'd be finished by now!" _

The young Soul Reaper resisted the urge to sigh. _Are all Hollows this arrogant…?_

His mouth twitched and he whispered, "Hyōrinmaru."

A huge amount of glacial diamonds exploded from the blade and swirled along the length of the Arrancar's arm. As she bawled in pain he lithely leapt away and murmured, "Hadō #31. Shakkaho." A gleaming crimson orb cannoned out of his hand and detonated with a boom against the ice-covered arm. Its owner blared as her skin went from freezing cold to burning hot and several cracks appeared on her armor.

"_Damn you, damn you!" _

Tōshirō jumped away, satisfied at the amount of damage he had placed. However, glancing over toward his wilted third seat he knew that he had to kill the Arrancar soon and get her medical attention.

He hurdled backward to higher ground again, shooting off some reiatsu momentarily. An icy cold draft suddenly swept in. It only added emphasis to the glower he was sending to the Arrancar.

"This has been going on longer than I wanted it to. I'm going to finish you off in one blow," he declared, his aqua eyes hardening.

"Oh, yeah?!" she spat. "Why end the fun so soon, eh, brat?"

Tōshirō resisted the urge to sigh again. "Three reasons. One, I have an injured subordinate that needs medical attention immediately. Two, if this goes on, your berserk reiatsu is going to cause a huge explosion unless I defeat you here and now. And third… I don't want to look at the hideous face of yours any longer." It was true. The sight of that swollen face was not going to give him sweet dreams that night.

He heard his lieutenant's loud chortle and cheering but ignored it, readying himself for an attack. The Hollow's face stared in severe disbelief, but then it twisted into an expression of pure fury. She screamed out an insulting name as her own reiatsu level went up and with a great snarl catapulted her worm-like limb at him again, its speeding causing it to whistle as it hurtled toward him. Tōshirō couldn't resist and sighed quietly at the Arrancar's histrionics, flash-stepping away from the missile effortlessly.

Once he was out of his enemy's range he firmly grasped the chain hanging from his sword and tossed it powerfully at the launched appendage, the metal wrapping itself along half of the long centipede appendage. Tōshirō's strong reiatsu allowed Hyōrinmaru's chain to avoid dissolving. The moment it wrapped its full length ice began to sprout from the shackles, coating her arm.

"_No!" _she screamed, tugging futilely against the cold metal. The more it covered, the faster the frozen water spread, eventually enveloping the entire thing.

Tōshirō inhaled and pulled forcefully pulled, completely disengaging the arm from its socket with a sharp _crack_.

The huge frozen mass fell to the ground, blowing apart into tiny ice splinters.

The Arrancar thrashed and bawled in absolutely agony, spit and loose blood flying in flecks. Her eyes gained a manic glint in them as they wildly tried to focus on the young Captain. He regarded her with a distant stare.

"You're finished. _Hyōrinmaru_."

One last cascade of ice bloomed from his zanpakutō, materializing into a giant ice dragon. Still writhing in pain the Arrancar couldn't dodge. With a booming roar the dragon opened its fanged maw and barreled straight into her with loud shatters and streams of water flying. The moment they made contact the ice spread like wildfire (no pun intended), fiercer and more frigid than ever, quickly encasing the Hollow in an inescapable cage of frozen water.

Satisfied with his handiwork, Tōshirō leapt from his perch in the sky and approached his lieutenant and third seat. He ignored the former's manic cheering along with the awed expression Aria was sending him. With the Arrancar killed the anger at her he had buried earlier resurfaced, causing him to erect a cold front.

"Quit your blabbering, Matsumoto," he ordered, trying to hide his exasperation. "We need to get all the groups together and count casualties. Plus, we need to get a medic…" Despite his antagonism he threw a concerned glance at the girl lying in Rangiku's arms. She bristled a bit.

"I'm okay, really," she murmured very quietly.

Tōshirō thought otherwise. Up close he could tell her left arm was bent at what would normally be a painful position and she cradled it with the utmost care. She probably couldn't tell herself, but he could hear that her breaths came labored, as if something was restricting her lungs. Burn marks covered her cheeks and her green eyes looked tired.

He snorted and turned to Rangiku, questioning her on the girl's condition. As she listed the injuries, his forehead unconsciously furrowed.

_How can she still be alive after all that?_

"It's that bad!" Aria openly protested, suddenly rising, only to cringe from pain and shirk back into her former position.

At her outburst some of her Toshiro's composure cracked and he wheeled on her, his eyes fierce.

"You just took on an Arrancar, Miyamoto. One of the most dangerous things you could ever fight as a Soul Reaper. I'd appreciate that you'd take your wounds a _bit_ more seriously and try not to move for the time being. What were you thinking? Taking that thing on all by yourself?" He struggled to elude snapping

Aria seemed to want to answer, but the captain could see the faint vestiges of unconsciousness luring her into its grasp. Her eyes flickered and she suddenly was having a hard time keeping her eyelids open. He frowned slightly but dismissed it, promising that they'd talk about this another time. Ordering his lieutenant to contact all the other squad members, he proceeded by extracting his own phone. What utterly puzzled him was that now the connection seemed to have cleared.

_That's strange… It's completely cleared up now, _he mused. _And it was completely blocking communication just a while ago…_He told himself that he would check into it with the Technological Bureau once they returned to the Soul Society.

"Hello! This is the Technological Bureau speaking! Is the connection stable now?" a voice said from the other end.

"This is Captain Hitsugaya of Squad 10, and yes, everything is fine now," Tōshirō replied. "I'm calling in for permission to open a Senkaimon back to the Soul Society."

"Ah yes, sir! I'll get on that right away!"

"Oh, and while you're at it, can you please get me in touch with Captain Unohana? There's someone I want her to take care of once we're back."

"Of course, Captain Hitsugaya. Once all the preparations are made I'll get in touch with you right away."

The operator went on hold for a few moments before Tōshirō heard a click on the other end.

"Ah, Captain Hitsugaya," a gentle voice greeted. "It's very nice to hear from you, but I heard there was something you needed to discuss…?"

"Yes, Captain Unohana. You see, I have a heavily injured subordinate that I wanted to check in so she can get immediate attention the moment we get back."

"I see. Are the injuries life-threatening?"

"No, but she's badly hurt. You see…" He hesitated for a moment.

"What is it?"

"She was attacked by an Arrancar."

There was silence on the other end and Tōshirō began to explain briefly what had happened, something he would relay once more in his report later on. In the background he could vaguely hear Rangiku reassuring Aria about something, but did not pay much attention to it.

"I see… If that's the case, then I will definitely make preparations for your third seat," Retsu Unohana assured.

"Thank you very much, Captain Unohana. I appre—"

Suddenly a jarring crash rang through the night and both captain and lieutenant looked up, startled. There the Arrancar stood, albeit heavily injured, but still very much alive.

"_Dammit, dammit!!!" _she wailed over and over. "_I'll kill you! I'll kill you all!"_

"Excuse me, Captain, but I have an urgent matter to attend to," Tōshirō growled into the phone.

"Yes, yes, proceed. And please be careful!" And then the Squad 4 Captain hung up.

He heard Rangiku voice her disbelief as he grimaced toward the Arrancar. There she stood, covered in ice shards and more furious than ever

"_Damn you! Damn you all!" _

She suddenly opened her hideous maw and red beams began to gather around her mouth. Tōshirō cursed.

"Darn it… I underestimated her… With her out-of-control reiatsu, that Cero is enough to destroy this section of the forest…" He reached up for Hyōrinmaru, beginning to draw upon his reiatsu. The crazed Hollow hooted.

"_Now you'll pay! You'll all pay!! That hag, the little baby in the back, and you, the annoying brat in the front!" _The red light above her mouth intensified and Tōshirō prepared to attack.

"_Cer—"_

"You… kou… Oshaku…"

Both superiors froze in shock as a purple flaming blur flew past them, spiraling in the air, transformed into a lethal missile. The Arrancar's eyes widened in shock, but only for a moment as a split second later the corkscrewing scepter cut past the destructive Cero and drilled right through the Hollow's forehead. Its flames died out as it effortlessly buried itself into the tree behind her. The smell of burning flesh hung heavy in the air as a sizable hole was left in the bewildered Arrancar's face.

Behind him Tōshirō could only hear the exhausted panting of his third seat. He veered, giving her an incredulous look. She was on her knees, half-risen, her right arm raised at a low level, and it looked like she was in great pain. Nevertheless her emerald orbs had once again gained that sharp, determined expression he always knew as she gave a frightening glower toward the dissolving Hollow.

_This girl… _he thought in amazement.

"_Damn… you…" _the Arrancar condemned before her face had dispersed as well.

"Goodbye… Loly…" the semi-conscious girl whispered. "And one more thing… Don't you _dare_… even _think_ that Captain Hitsugaya… is an annoying brat…"

As the last of the Arrancar named Loly dissipated, Aria's green eyes hazed and she suddenly collapsed onto the ground.

"H-hey!" Rangiku suddenly shouted, rushing to the third seat's side. Tōshirō regained his composure as well and strode slowly over as well.

"All that… Just because she called me a brat…?" Tōshirō mused quietly. Aria's face was steered toward the side, and it was obvious that she was completely out of it, but he could detect the barest hint of pride in that pale face of hers. He absently reached out and brushed aside a strand of hair hanging over her face, his eyes still filled with slight wonder as he regarded her.

Rangiku gently picked her up in her arms. "She's a determined girl, I'll give her that," she said in a soft tone. "Very strong…"

The captain snorted. "You mean obstinate," he answered. "I could have easily taken care of it. But she…" He glanced down once more at the comatose child.

The lieutenant cradled her like a baby. "Well I kind of like it," she said proudly. "She's kind of fiery, don't you think?"

Tōshirō had never thought of it that way. When it came to Aria the quality "fiery" had never crossed his mind before. Now that he thought about it some more, he agreed that she was, in her own way, a very ardent kind of person.

"What do you think was that attack she used earlier?" Rangiku questioned, nodding toward Aria's lodged zanpakutō.

"Probably something she picked up while she was fighting…" he mused. He suddenly recalled the wedged weapon and flash-stepped up to the tree to retrieve it. Tōshirō was shocked to find that it had pierced halfway through the tree and tried to pry it out.

_Strange…I swear it was surrounded by flames… Why isn't anything burned? _He pondered as he at last pulled out the weapon with some difficulty. He examined curiously before returning to his subordinates.

_So this is what Miyamoto's shikai looks like… I didn't get a good look at it at the Academy… She must have sealed it right after. _

The rosy scepter suddenly began to transform and he watched as it slowly morphed back into its sealed katana state as Aria's reiatsu receded. He was mystified at the slightly bloodthirsty glint it gave off before returning it to its sheath on Aria's back. He stood up abruptly and looked away to a distant spot.

"We'd better get going. All the squad members should be at the rendezvous area by now."

"Yes…" Rangiku looked away absently for a moment, but suddenly her eyes widened.

"Hang on, Captain. Can we just stay for one more moment? I need to check something." Without consent she suddenly rose and shoved Aria into her surprised captain's arms.

"H-hey! Be more careful!" he protested.

"There! You can hold her while I'm gone!" Rangiku gave a wink before running off.

_There's something wrong with that woman, I swear… _Tōshirō thought. He suddenly remembered the girl propped against his body and unintentionally turned pink. He shook his head violently as he tried to clear his head.

"It's not like she's awake or anything," he growled. "She'll probably be out for awhile…"

He looked down at Aria's sleeping face and didn't look away. He tightened his arms to keep her from sliding to the ground and examined her face, which he suddenly realized was propped very close to his neck.

_She's still as warm as ever… _With no one around Tōshirō took it to himself to luxuriate in that same warmth that he silently enjoyed. His aqua eyes took in her face and they fleetingly flashed angrily at the burnt flesh there. The edges of the burns were jagged and revealed the raw dermis.

_Her face… _He reached up and lightly brushed the ragged skin. He'd be sure to have Captain Unohana pay extra attention to her face when they got back…

His eyes in the general vicinity of her head, something else caught his interest. Aria's shihakushō was somewhat loose and a tiny bit her upper back was revealed. Right below the base of her neck was a thin, silvery line that disappeared down her shirt.

_A scar…? _

His hands moved from Aria's cheek to the beginning of the blemish. His fingers brushed against it and it felt surprisingly prominent against the girl's smooth skin. It was slightly raised and felt overly rough for its size under his fingertips, as though it had never healed properly.

_Why would she have a scar there…? _He wondered. Perhaps he could ask her later, because he couldn't just look down her shirt like some curious pervert.

"Captain."

His hand rapidly jerked away from Aria's neck as his white head swerved to the side. There stood Rangiku with a strangely serious expression on her face. At her side, wrapped in her arm, was a limp body.

"A casualty?" he asked, his forehead kneading. Rangiku nodded solemnly, and Tōshirō gently put Aria down onto the ground. He didn't want to put her there, but he needed his hands free for a moment. He sauntered to his lieutenant and peered at the body.

"I know this guy…" he said to himself. "He was one of the squad members who were more specialized in healing… Nakajima was his last name…" He noticed the large laceration on the boy's abdomen and frowned.

"There are traces of Aria's reiatsu on him," she explained. "She probably encountered him sometime. The slash on the other hand…" She put him down and pointed. "Has traces of that Arrancar reiatsu on it."

"She killed him," the unhappy captain stated flatly. He turned his head and saw the scared expression that had remained on those lifeless eyes. "He was obviously no match for her, and she just killed him."

"That's too bad," Rangiku remarked sadly. "He didn't have a place in battle anyway. We were going to transfer him to Squad 4 when we got back, even though he wanted to stay. He was a good kid…"

"I wonder if she was around when he was…"

The thought snapped his mind into focus and he switched back to Aria. _She couldn't have actually seen him get killed, could she…? If that's the case then…_

Rangiku too looked at the girl on the ground, seeming to Tōshirō's thoughts. "That's probably the case. How sad…" she stated. "It must have been very upsetting for her, seeing something like that."

_Is that why she engaged the Arrancar? _Aria may be persistent, but Tōshirō knew that she was sensible and wouldn't act on impulse. Unless… Unless something fuel that temper of hers…

The sharp captain had always suspected that death had something to do with why Aria was so sad all the time. He was never able to confirm that suspicion since there wasn't much in her file, but it seemed like a logical guess. If someone had died in her past, then he couldn't imagine what it had felt like when she watched her comrade get killed in such a macabre way.

"Never mind," he sighed, rising from his crouch on the ground. "We'll have a burial back in the Seireitei. For now let's just get going and hurry back."

"Yes, sir. Oh! And I also found these!" She reached into her pocket and extracted two purple ribbons.

"Are those…?" He hadn't noticed her hair was down until he saw the ribbons.

"Yes! They're the ribbons I gave to Aria! They must have fallen off while she was fighting…" She glanced again at the fallen figure, then back down to the ribbons. Something was telling her that there was something strange about the ribbons, but what…?

She spotted her superior retrieving Aria from her place on the ground, gingerly setting her in his back.

"Captain, I can carry two people. I can carry her for you if you want." She put the hair ornaments back into her pocket, knowing she'd give them back another time.

He pondered this for a few moments. "Fine. Just be careful with her."

After the exchange took place the four Soul Reapers, two fully awake and able to function, one unconscious and one dead, took off to the designated spot without a second glance at the setting of bloodshed.

As predicted, numerous Soul Reapers had gathered at the selected meeting place, an open meadow that could accommodate all of them. As Squad 10's Captain and lieutenant appeared before them many of the loyal Soul Reapers rushed over to them.

"Captain! We're so glad you're safe!" Many of them were saying.

Tōshirō motioned to a random one. "Any casualties?" he asked, his tone returning to its usual iciness.

"None that we could find. Some injured, but no deaths." His eyes flickered for a moment at the limp figures in Rangiku's arms. "Are they…?"

"One is," he replied impassively. A murmur ran through the crowd.

"Hey, hey! Let me through!" A voice ordered. Pushing his way through the crowd was none other than the fourth seat, his eyes worried.

"Is she alright? What happened to Aria?" he asked. Behind him was a girl with copper hair and gray eyes, silently watching in concern.

"She's not the one who's dead," Tōshirō replied curtly.

Both the boy and girl breathed sighs of relief.

"Then again, I'm surprised you're even worried, Sawahata, since you were the one who left her in the first place."

Several gasps could be heard and the addressed widened his electric blue eyes, his face turning into an angry shade of cherry. His mouth pressed into a thin line and he took a shaky step forward. Several Soul Reapers muttered hushed words as they tried to dissuade him from doing whatever he wanted to do. Reluctantly he shirked back and he carefully kept his mouth in check.

_Smart boy, _his captain thought. "Never mind that now. I'll speak to you about this when we get back. Just get ready to leave."

"Yes…sir…" the blond boy uttered through clenched teeth. The copper haired girl gently tugged on his sleeve and pulled him back a few inches, whispering words of calming in his ear.

Right on cue, Tōshirō's soul pager rang and he pressed it to his ear.

"Is the Senkaimon ready?"

"Yes, sir. Sorry about the delay, they weren't expecting you to be coming back so early. They should be opening…right now."

Just as the person on the other line promised, three doors suddenly appeared, surrounded by a bright light. Many Soul Reapers covered their eyes for a moment, their eyes having adjusted to the darkness of the night. When the doors opened, several Hell Butterflies appeared, fluttering patiently.

"Let's go," the Captain of Squad 10 ordered. The people clad in black sprang forward, the eagerness to return home almost palpable in the air. They followed the graceful butterflies through the portal and disappeared in flashes.

Tōshirō and Rangiku were the last to go, just in case something suddenly attacked from behind. Once they were sure the coast was clear, they headed toward the doors.

"Go ahead. I'll be right behind you," Tōshirō commanded. With a nod his lieutenant ran carefully forward and disappeared as well.

The young captain hesitated for a moment and looked back at the shadowy forest. He didn't realize until now, but he had the oddest sensation that they had been watched this whole time. He shrugged and joined his subordinates in the doors of light.

They closed with a sense of finality, the light completely extinguished, plunging the woods in absolutely obscurity once more.

The wind howled, its voice stirring rustles from the gloomy silence. Then it stopped immediately, leaving the emptiness only absolute carnage could have left behind.

**

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***Ombegeezers. Geez. How long was that? *checks* Fourteen pages. Wow. But if you put all the last chapters together into one big one... Well, everyone can do the math here. This one pales in comparison to that.

**I have nothing much to say, strangely enough.... Even after two months...  
Sawahata: Not even about Bleach?  
Me: *shakes head*  
Sawahata: Manga? Anime?  
Me: Nope.  
Sawahata: Not even about Howl's Moving Castle that you watched a bajillion times?  
Me: Nuh uh. Though it was a good movie. I really wanted to see Ponyo. But no.  
Sawahata: IT'S THE APOCALYPSE!!! HOLY SMOKES THE WORLD IS GOING TO END!!!  
Me: ......Did you watch "2012" or something?**

Oh yeah... I think I'm going to change Sawahata's first name, because the current one just sounds way too weird. There's a poll on my profile regarding on if you want me to change it to something better sounding... Like Takumi. He looks like a Takumi to me. Ok, that's all for now!

**Please review! (Released November 17, 2009)**


	24. It's the Small Things that Count

*****OMG. I UPDATED BEFORE TWO MONTHS. HOLY FREAK IT'S A MIRACLE!!!  
Well, this is sort of a filler-y kind of chapter but I...like it for some reason. It was such a pain editing this because FFN kept freezing on me OVER AND OVER AND OVER. I was driven insane. Thanks again to my beta Mikomi-oneechan for giving me a hand in this! LOVE YOU!! (Updated 12/19/09)  
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_Earth pounded beneath my feet. My gasps came out like wild huffs, and it wasn't just the running that was doing it. I stumbled more times than I could count, but I forced myself to keep moving. That way, at least, I had a better chance to get away. The way I had taught myself to survive._

_Behind me, I could hear muffled shouts. Angry voices. I knew what they were saying, even though I couldn't hear their exact words._

_I turned a dark corner and took a risk, resting against the wall for only a few seconds. Before long I was running again, dodging skimpy branches that clung to my flying hair. I hoped the dense wood would be enough to hide me._

_The voices got louder, and I ran faster. Suddenly, an overturned root jammed my foot and I collapsed, my face implanted into the bitter, cold dirt. Spluttering, but trying to keep quiet at the same time, I dusted myself off swiftly and pushed myself again, even though my legs were aching for me to stop._

_And then I ran into a wall._

_It wasn't a wall so much as it was some sort of obstacle in my path. I collided into it, and strangely it moved, but by then I had fallen back down to the earth. I shook my trembling head and looked up to see what I had bumped into._

_Cold fear stabbed my heart with its icy, merciless blade. In front of me, looming like an ominous cloud, was a man with a sword. In the faint light of the crescent moon, the weapon looked even more dangerous than usual. The edges were jagged and mildly rusted, symbolizing disuse, but tonight the blade had a chance to spill blood after such a long time._

_The man turned around, the moonlight hitting his back in a way that made it impossible for me to see his face. Regardless, I could see the look in his eyes—the eyes of a person beholding a monster._

_His eyes flickered in surprise, but they hardened quickly. Swiftly he reached down and grabbed the collar of my shirt before I could react. My mind refocused and I began to thrash wildly, trying to escape the claw-like vice I was in._

_He shouted, and more cries could be heard. Panic coursed through my veins, a frantic surge of adrenaline along with it. Everything came into sharp focus, but the images became warped, twisted. Rogue vines shot from the earth and whirled about, skirting the ankles of my captor. I tried to contain it, but more and more plants just seemed to rise, twisting around the man's body. He hollered, and it hurt my ears. He grasped his battered sword with both hands, thus dropping me, and swung wildly, randomly cutting any plant that came near him. I winced as I felt the screams of the felled plants, but in the confusion, I scrambled to my knees in an effort to escape._

_More voices—this time even closer. The adrenaline made my limbs quake and it made it hard to run. Stupid, clumsy me…_

_Something grabbed me from behind and flung me back. I was sent sprawling with a cry. Apparently, my assailant had escaped from my vine snare._

_He ran over, hovering over me. He grasped the rugged sword with both hands and held it over me, a thin guillotine in the night. I cried and tried to scuttle away. I spun onto my hands and knees, turning my back onto my assailant and tried to move._

_The blade came swinging down._

_An enormous explosion of pain erupted in my back and I could feel my throat stinging from my earsplitting shriek. The edges of my vision began to flicker, and the last thing I saw was a legion of plants rupturing from the ground… when everything disappeared._

I could feel my eyes flickering.

Everything came as a blur at first. All shapes, all fuzzy, all at once. Couldn't see anything…

"You're coming around!" A muffled voice echoed. "Captain!"

Too much noise. My head hurt. Why couldn't they just leave me be?

"Isane, please quiet down," a softer, much quieter voice said. "She isn't used to loud noises right now."

"Right. My gravest apologies, Captain Unohana."

I was grateful for whoever that was. The quiet settled and I could feel myself coming around. What happened…?

At some point, my vision was clear enough for me to see fairly well, and instinctively I turned my head to look around.

Not a great idea. The slightest movement sent a horrible throb through my temple, ringing through my ears and a groan erupting from my lips.

"Try not to move for now," the soft voice said. "Let yourself adjust."

I did as she told and held still until my vision got steadily better. As it did, I moved my eyes instead of my head, hoping that that wouldn't cause me too much pain.

Thankfully, it didn't. Everything cleared and I gazed at the unfamiliar sight before me.

I was in a bland room, not particularly decorated with anything special. A small closet, a table, chairs. White walls, white ceiling, beige floors…

I was suddenly aware of some presences nearby and my eyes wheeled.

There were two people beside me. Women. One was incredibly tall, with light purple hair and an expression that was a strange combination of intelligence and carelessness at the same time. Nevertheless, she stared down at me with concern. The other was a more serene presence. Sporting a long-sleeved haori, she was sitting down, a long black braid tied in the front of her body, as opposed to the back. Her expression was one of gentleness and she stared at me with kind eyes.

Almost… like a mother…

"Ah, I see you're awake, Miyamoto-san," she said kindly. I nodded the slightest bit and winced.

"For… the most part," I replied, my head still aching.

"We'll get you medication for your head soon, so please be patient," she assured. "Isane? If you please?"

"Ah, yes, Captain." The purple-haired woman rushed off.

Captain…?

Suddenly, everything came into focus, and I knew where I was.

"Captain… Unohana…?" I muttered.

She smiled. It was pretty.

"Ah, it seems you're finally starting to come to."

My eyes continued their restless circle around the room.

"Why… am I here…?"

Her smile vanished. "You don't remember?"

I frowned and concentrated, trying to recall any details. Unfortunately, my mind was hazed and I couldn't dredge up any useful detail. I cringed again as my skull pounded.

The gentle captain placed a soft hand over mine. "Never mind that, dear. I'll just tell you to avoid you any more headaches. Miyamoto-san, don't you remember? You were attacked by an Arrancar…"

I stared at her for a few moments, my hazy mind trying to process her words. She waited patiently as my mind worked laboriously.

And then it clicked.

I remembered… The slim figure of Loly, looming over me with that poisonous smirk… That dagger that she slashed at me so eagerly… The red blasts she shot at me so insistently…

More images. Memories.

A boy, sitting next to me.

Rustles. Screams.

A glint of metal. Blood.

And then stillness.

My eyes widened, and I felt my heart beat faster. Something near me beeped.

"W-What happened?" I asked frantically. "That boy… Where…?"

Captain Unohana seemed to know what I was talking about as her expression turned sad. "Ah yes, Nakajima-san. Well you see… He didn't exactly survive."

"Didn't… survive…?" I repeated. She nodded. I could feel my face turning downwards in sadness and guilt as I remembered how he died.

He had no idea… I couldn't get him away… Nakajima… So that was his name…

"Can you… tell me about him?" I requested tentatively.

She stared at me with deep, blue-gray eyes. "Let's see now… Tetsuya Nakajima… He was in Squad 10 for awhile, but he was better at healing than combat… I know he was going to be transferred to my squad after the mission you went on, but he didn't want to leave his friends…"

I lay there, in my bed, pooled in sadness. I didn't even get a chance to say thank you…

I breathed.

A machine beeped.

Other than that, all was quiet.

More flashes. Memories conjured.

With my mind's eye, I could see… A swollen, monstrous form… Some resemblance to Loly… A lone, bloated arm. A flaming scepter, cutting…

"Ah!" I suddenly recalled. The captain looked up. "Where is… my sword…? Kurobararyu…?"

"Right here," she gestured. She picked something up from the table beside me and held it up to me. I sighed a breath of relief as I saw my zanpakutō's ruby sheathe, the black and red hilt, the rose guard…

_Happy to see me?_ A sleepy voice inquired.

_Kuro…!_

_No need to get excited… I'm here…_

"Thank… you…" I said, my tone full of gratitude.

Captain Unohana smiled. "No need. I've heard about your attachment to your sword." She placed Kurobararyu back on the table. "From now on, your zanpakutō will be here, always. You don't have to worry about it… her."

_Thank you very much…_ Kuro murmured.

Her voice sent more images through my mind. Loly was raising her lone arm above me… I think I cut off the other one… I could still taste the fear of death on my tongue, like a pungent stench in the air…

My thoughts were so messy, so jumbled. I tried to put everything into order and it took up quite some time.

"It looks like Isane is back…" the captain beside me murmured. I looked up to see Lieutenant… Kotetsu—yes, that was her name—enter the room, something clasped in her hand.

"I have the medicine, as you asked, Captain," she reported, handing a bottle to the older woman. She took it gracefully and unscrewed the lid, revealing several blue tablets.

"Do you think you could swallow these?" She questioned. "If not, then we can always use the IV."

I was immediately conscious of something poking into my hand. And it hurt. I glanced down and was surprised to see my left arm in a heavy cast, the other hand hidden under the covers. Carefully I extracted it, twitching as I did. As I had feared, several long needles were punctured into the back of my hand. I leered at them disdainfully.

"Yes, those might sting for awhile," Captain Unohana explained empathetically. Remembering her question, I turned back to her.

"Uh, I think I can swallow those…" I swallowed a bit down my throat, which was rather dry.

As if reading my mind, the serene captain reached over and grabbed a bottle of water. She pressed it to my lips and I drank greedily. The cool liquid felt nice rushing down my parched throat.

"Thank you… very much," I said. The captain smiled and shook her head, pouring some tablets into her palm.

"I know you won't be able to use your hands for awhile, and I'm simply doing my job," she declared kindly. I opened my mouth for the tablets and she quickly dispensed some more water into it, and I swallowed loudly.

"That should do it. Your head will feel fine in a few minutes." She suddenly sat up and checked the machines around me. Seeming content, she turned her back and headed toward the door.

"You should rest for now, Miyamoto-san. I'll have someone come and check on you every so often. If you need anything in particular, please try to push that button by the monitor."

I turned my head and spotted a small red button next to the beeping machine, just as she told me.

"Oh, and one more thing. Some friends of yours were kind enough to drop off some presents while you were still asleep."

"Um… If you don't mind me asking… How long was I out?"

She contemplated this for a moment. "Hmm… Only about a day and a half. Not surprising, considering all those injuries you sustained. Come, Isane." Lieutenant Kotetsu sprang up and opened the door for the wise captain and slipped out as well. Her head peeked around the door frame.

"Er… Try to get some rest, if you can," she said meekly. "Sleep as much as you want. If you need anything… Just ring." She slid the door shut.

Once she was gone I gingerly craned my neck upwards at the table, trying to spy the "presents" Captain Unohana had mentioned. I was delighted to see a vase of vibrant, white edelweiss on the table, with a "Get Well Soon" card beside it.

"Now who could have sent those…?" I mused. "Edelweiss… What an interesting choice…"

The edelweiss, as I had learned, meant something along the lines of "daring" and "noble courage." I snorted quietly. Someone needs to get up to speed with their flower meanings.

Slowly, I used my needle-embedded hand and achingly reached up to pluck the card off the table. Wincing as the needles bit into me, I gingerly moved my hand down and one-handedly opened the piece of paper.

"Hope you get well soon! Can't wait to see you wake up, sleepyhead…" I read. "Sincerely, Takumi Sawahata and… Kozue Iwahara?"

I was surprised to see Iwahara-san's name on there. I thought she didn't like me that much…

Some tiny writing at the bottom caught my eye. The handwriting made me identify it as belonging to Sawahata-kun.

_P.S. I swear the Seireitei was having an earthquake while you slept… Because you snore when you sleep. Really, really loud. One thing's for sure: You're definitely no Sleeping Beauty! More like a troll under the bridge! Or a pig! Snort, snort!_

Kurobararyu roared with laughter.

I bit my lip and my face blushed. Despite my pained hand, I crushed the card in fury.

"I do NOT!"

_*******************_

The day passed slowly. Probably because I had nothing to do.

I stared out my window listlessly. I was jealous of the plants out there who were rejoicing in the bright sunshine.

Darn… I wanna go out too…

But with all these wires and complicated equipment, I was afraid I'd get myself even more hurt just trying to figure out how to disengage it all.

However, that didn't mean my mind was idle.

I thought back to the dream I had right before I woke up. Frankly, it was meaningless. Utterly pointless. Just another fragment of my gory past. But thanks to that man there was a long, silver scar that ran down from about the base of my neck all the way down to my right hip. I had many other scars as well, but they weren't too much of a problem and I could usually hide them easily. I was surprised that Captain Hitsugaya had not noticed the ones on my shoulders, having made me his temporary roommate for a few weeks now.

Eventually, I got used to the stabbing pains in my hand and even asked a nurse if she had something I could read or anything else I could do. Eventually, she brought me some paper and a pen, and I doodled randomly over the page. I had always enjoyed drawing, but the only problem was that I could never draw actual people and could only go for childish chibi drawings (which still weren't that good)…

The things I drew were simply things that came to mind. Kurobararyu's released shikai form. A flower. Section of a forest. A Chinese dragon…

I blinked and stared at the badly drawn creature (chibis and dragons never mixed well with me) before me. It was so familiar…

That's right! I realized. Captain's release shikai!

I could remember it all now… The fight between Captain Hitsugaya and Loly… The most memorable parts were the cold winds that blew past me and the frightening sight of a giant ice dragon smashing into its target. I pressed my lips together, trying to evoke more memories.

"There was a fight…" That much was obvious. "Loly got frozen… And then… I think… she broke out… Captain and Rangiku-san didn't notice… She started forming some… red thing… And then…" I focused a bit harder. "Oh right! And then I used Youkou Oshaku and then… killed her."

Youkou Oshaku…?

_Don't tell me you forgot about that, too,_ my zanpakutō sighed. _That new technique I taught you for my release form._

She brought up some images and I started to understand. The ruby scepter engulfed by purple flames was indeed familiar… I can still recall the way the flames flickered over my skin but didn't come close to burning it… The sudden power I felt swinging it at my opponent…

Huh… So that's how I did it…

Kurobararyu sighed. _You really don't remember anything, do you? I'm not even sure you even got hit in the head while you were fighting… The face, but not the head…_

It didn't really matter to me. I just kept on trying to remember.

Small details flurried in and out of my mind as I studied the ceiling. It was probably the pain medication they were keeping me on… My head was still fuzzy.

_Shoot… I'm bored. Maybe a nap…?_

At that moment I could hear some ruckus coming from outside the door. I listened intently, just out of boredom.

"Hey, Takumi! You can't barge in like that! What if she's still asleep?" a low female voice went.

"There's no way; she's been sleeping for a day and a half! She should have woken up by now!" This one belonged to a male.

"Excuse me, but you two have to be quiet; there are patients trying to get some rest…" Another voice said gently.

"He's right. Let's go back, Takumi, you're already in enough trouble as it is…"

"I'm not leaving until I see her!"

_Sawa… hata-kun?_

There were some louder noises and out of nowhere the door came slamming open. There stood Sawahata-kun, huffing with determination, his bright blue eyes glinting. Behind him, strangely enough, was another girl, with short copper hair and hesitant griseous eyes.

I know her… Er… Who was she again…? Geez, I hate pain medication…

"I told you she'd be awake…" the boy muttered. The girl bridled.

"Well, she would have been resting anyway. We should have come tomorrow, or the next day," she replied hotly.

Oh! I remember now! That girl… Her name is… Kozue… Iwahara! The girl who…

Some memories I weren't exactly fond of popped up.

_… Er…_

My zanpakutō sighed. _Must I do everything?_ She summoned more recent memories, many of them containing beastly Hollows. I saw amethyst-colored fire, and Iwahara standing there, staring at me and mouthing, "Thank you."

_Oh… I see now…_

I remembered my visitors and unsuccessfully waved them in. "You two can come in if you want, I'm pretty much awake."

Sawahata-kun stepped in immediately, Iwahara trailing slowly behind. He took a seat in a chair next to my bed and I motioned for the girl to do the same.

"You can sit down if you want; there's another chair over there."

She frowned and shook her head. "No thanks… I'll stand, thank you."

Her tone was so different… It lost its reedy quality and was replaced by a low, tomboyish pitch that wasn't unkind. Her gray eyes darted around the room nervously, and I noticed how she never looked me directly in the eye.

"So… how have you two b—"

"Feeling well, Aria?" Sawahata-kun interrupted. I blinked at the interruption but recovered.

"Sure… for the most part…"

He appraised me for a few seconds. "You look like you've been through hell."

I leered. "No, really?"

He chortled. "Yeah, that was a stupid thing to say."

I abruptly became aware of the bandages wrapped on both people. Sawahata-kun had some dressing bound around his right wrist and some around his neck and face as well. Iwahara had some wrapped around her forehead and bandages wrapped around the palms of her hands.

"You don't look so great, either."

The boy looked at his bandaged arm and chuckled. "Oh, this? Nothin' for you to worry about. Compared to you, we look pretty alright." He nudged his companion, who jumped.

"Uh, yeah, we're okay…" she trailed off. Sawahata-kun shook his head.

"C'mon, if you have something to say, spit it out already."

Iwahara shifted uncomfortably.

I now grasped that I didn't dislike her as much I did before and I didn't mind hearing her speak.

"Go ahead, say whatever you want," I encouraged.

Hearing my consent, Iwahara seemed to relax a tiny bit, taking in a deep breath and reluctantly eyeing me. It was silent for a few moments.

"I…" she began. "I owe you an apology. For before."

Silence.

I stared at her, unable to comprehend her words. I was certainly not expecting this. She seemed uncomfortable again, under my intense stare.

"I know… That I haven't been treating you like an actual person… You know, with feelings and a mind and stuff like that…" She pursed her lips before taking another deep breath. "And to be frank, I… didn't really think you were an actual person, even though that was totally unjustified… So I guess I acted like a prick to you, even though you never actually did anything…"

Sawahata-kun snorted. "Let's get to the point, Kozue. She can't stay awake all day." He reached over and played with the large bottle of medication on the counter beside me. My eyes shifted back towards the girl.

"Shut up! This isn't coming easy for me!" she snapped. I sat there patiently. I could understand how difficult it was to put feelings into words, especially in a situation like this.

"Well… I just wanted to say… I'm sorry." Her gray eyes turned melancholy and she had regret hidden within them. "I was completely wrong about you. You're not… a witch, or a monster. I take back all those horrible things I said back then. Now that I think about it, if it were me being called those names, I would have beaten up whoever said it right then and there." She shifted again, rolling her weight from one foot to another.

"But that's the point. You never did anything. You just stood there… And took it. Without a word. You didn't lash out, you didn't do anything… You just took it and didn't bother anyone about it. And that's what's so amazing to me… But, I… can't imagine how it must have felt… Holding all those emotions inside. So… I hope you'll forgive me, Miyamoto, because I really am sorry. I hope that… We can be friends from this point on." She glanced at me sideways, unsure.

I was stunned. No, beyond that. Astonished. Absolutely astounded. Never had I ever imagined anyone actually apologizing to me over the things they had done to me in the past. Ever. My heart gave a flighty thump, and the machine beeped. But I wasn't hurting. I was… Happy. Very happy.

Coming here… was definitely a good idea.

"Sure, I'd like that," I muttered softly. "And… You don't have to call me by my last name, Iwahara. Aria is just fine."

She smiled tentatively. "Okay, I can do that. And you don't have to call me by my last name either, though I'm not sure if you know my first name or not, since I never gave you a reason to learn it…"

I shook my head. "No, I know it alright. Kozue, right?"

"Yeah! Anyway, now that… things are cleared up, I'll tell those nasty guys spreading the rumors to stop, okay?"

I cracked a smile. "Thanks… I'd appreciate that."

"Alright! We're all settled now, right?" Sawahata-kun burst. Both of us jumped, and the machine bleeped loudly.

"Hey! You just killed the mood!" Kozue snapped, smacking the boy on the back of the head.

"Ow! What the heck was that for?!"

"You killed the mood!"

"How do you kill a mood?!"

"By taking a fork and stabbing it in the forehead," Kozue replied sarcastically. "No, how do you think?!"

The two started to bicker and I couldn't help but smile to myself.

Oh, who was I kidding? I was beaming.

Before long, however, Sawahata-kun stopped his squabbling and looked at me.

"Hey, Aria? Where are your hair ribbons? You have them on most of the time," he noted.

My hand automatically reached up to touch my hair, and I winced as the needles moved. But I noticed that my hair had been pinned back, and not a trace of my ribbons to be seen. Frantically, I looked around on the table, but they weren't there either.

"W-Where'd they go?" I asked anxiously. "I need my hair ribbons!"

"Hey, hey! Relax!" The fourth seat soothed. "I'm pretty sure I heard the lieutenant saying something about her keeping them until you woke up. Happy?"

I deflated back into my bed, my anxiety dissipated. "Oh," I uttered.

"I'm sure she'll come drop them off soon," Kozue murmured gruffly. "Are they really important to you?"

"They were… a gift," I explained. I didn't mention the part about me putting the kidō spells on them either, but they didn't need to know about that anyway.

"Alright then," Sawahata-kun muttered. "Well, if that's all that you need, we'll just be leaving then. Don't want to disturb your rest." He headed out the door.

"Later… Aria," Kozue parted, following the fourth seat.

"See you," I called. I wanted to wave my hand but for obvious reasons couldn't. "Oh, wait!"

They both paused before exiting the room.

"Uh… Thanks… For the flowers. I don't know if edelweiss was the best choice though… I'm not brave at all…"

They stared at me as if I had spoken in a different language.

"Well, you know… Each flower has a different meaning… I read somewhere that the edelweiss symbolizes bravery and that kind of stuff… I'm not saying that I'm ungrateful, no, it's just that I don't think it really suits me… But I guess you wouldn't know about that, huh…?"

Kozue suddenly had an odd expression on her face. "Ah… That's good to know… C'mon, Takumi, let's go. Don't want to disturb her, now do you we?"

"Wha…? H-Hey! What's with that look? Ow, what are you doing?!"

Kozue had grabbed Sawahata-kun by the ear and dragged him out the door. She turned back and, nodded, shutting the door behind her. It was then that I heard voices outside.

"I told you we shouldn't have gotten those flowers! I bet she hates them!"

"What? They were pretty! And they matched her hair!"

"Don't you start with me! I knew enough about this to know this would happen! Do you seriously want me to hurt you for being stupid?!"

"Hey! I think she's plenty brave, taking that thing on!"

"I know that, but it's no good if she doesn't like them! C'mere, you!"

"H-Hey, wait! What are you—HEY! OUCH, THAT HURTS!! GET OFF! GET OFF RIGHT NOW!!"

At that point, someone shushed them and ushered them away.

I didn't say I hated them, did I? Nonetheless, I giggled a bit.

And then I froze.

Did I just giggle…?

_Sounded like that to me,_ Kuro replied sleepily. _It's kind of nice… I can't remember the last time you laughed genuinely._

I thought about it and realized she was right. I couldn't remember the last time I felt the sound of laughter erupt from my lips. It had been so long ago since I even felt the slightest twinge to even smile. It was a very pleasant feeling; my chest felt lighter and my pain seemed a little less… Painful. It was almost like a drug; I just wanted more. Whoever said laughter was the medicine for everything was right.

I shifted against the pillow. "I feel… Lighter…" I muttered to myself. "I don't know why… But it feels good… And I won't take it for granted. I can't remember the last time I felt like this… It's… Nice…"

Apparently, the events of the day had exhausted me, and my eyelids slowly slid shut…

* * *

Hours later, the door to the room of Squad 10's third seat slid open silently and a pair of bright blue eyes peeked in front the slit. Brushing aside ginger hair, she squinted as she beheld the peacefully sleeping child in the room. She blanched at the sight of the needles protruding from the girl's hand, but took comfort in the fact that she was asleep so she couldn't feel them. Giving a content sigh, she slid the door shut and turned around.

"She's sound asleep, Captain," Rangiku Matsumoto whispered. "I'm not sure if it's a good idea to wake her up."

Tōshirō Hitsugaya frowned even more, but said nothing. He had wanted to speak with his third seat about some urgent matters, but he supposed they could wait until she woke up. Still, his turquoise eyes narrowed minutely and he crossed his arms.

"When was the last time she was awake, if ever?" he asked gruffly.

"It was about three hours ago," a gentle voice answered from behind.

He swiftly turned and watched as Captain Retsu Unohana approached the two Soul Reapers. As usual, she exuded a calm yet authoritative air that would make any passing by immediately stop out of deep respect. As such, Rangiku bowed deeply and Tōshirō barely inclined his head.

"It's good to see you in good health, Captain Hitsugaya," Captain Unohana remarked.

"And to you as well, Captain Unohana," he replied respectfully. However, he dismissed the pleasantries quickly and continued on with what he had just been saying. "You say that my third seat was awake three hours ago?"

"Yes. She had been awake all morning and about a little after noon she had a couple of visitors." The tranquil captain's lips smiled quietly. "They were causing quite a ruckus in the barracks."

"Who were they?"

"Let's see… They were Takumi Sawahata, your fourth seat, I believe, and another one from your squad, Kozue Iwahara. Quite an interesting trio, those three make."

Tōshirō's eyes narrowed even further. "Do you know if they spoke about anything in particular?"

The female captain shook her head. "Nothing special that comes to mind. I thought I heard Kozue Iwahara speaking about something, but not something I would take note of. Those two were quite loud though; the most I could hear were the two of them arguing all the way out of the barracks."

The young captain pursed his lips. I suppose… That's alright then…

"Captain?" His lieutenant called tentatively. He turned his head a fraction to indicate that he was listening.

"Do you think I could go in there? Just to sit? I'm sure she'd appreciate it." She glanced at the Squad 4 captain, who nodded her consent. Rangiku bowed and smoothly opened the slider door, closing it behind her once she was inside. Her captain turned back toward the veteran Soul Reaper.

"How's her condition?" He inquired professionally.

"Ah, I was just about to talk with you about that, Captain Hitsugaya."

She mysteriously turned away and indicated him to follow her as she silently strolled away. Mystified, Tōshirō tagged along, wondering what she was going to do. They rounded a corner and Captain Unohana opened the door to her personal office and gestured for him to enter. He stepped into the room, which looked no different from the other squad administrative offices save for a few minor aesthetic changes. He watched as the Squad 4 captain entered as well and shut the door behind her.

"Do you want to take a seat?" she asked as she went over and sat down in a chair behind a desk.

"No, thank you," the boy answered stiffly. There was no reason in asking; he was sure she was going to explain.

Captain Unohana heaved a sigh. "The reason I have called you here, Captain Hitsugaya, in private, is in respect of the privacy of your third seat, Aria Miyamoto. And there are also some things I want to discuss."

Tōshirō nodded, not fully comprehending but respecting the elder captain in taking her time in explanations.

"You asked what her condition was, correct? It's just the same as in the report you sent me: broken rib, badly broken arm, in three places, I must tell you, and other minor injuries such as bruises. Those shouldn't take very long to mend; I can tell her body is adept at healing itself. Her left arm is the one that will take the most to heal; she'll be wearing that for at least six weeks and then we'll put her in a splint, and let her body do the rest. But in the meantime, when she is released, don't let her out on any missions to the world of the living or anything strenuous in general. Just send her in every now and then and we'll see when she can do all those things again."

The young captain listened intently, only because he was looking forward to the things the captain wanted to discuss. She seemed a bit more serious than usual today; whether he'd find out why would take time.

"There are also some… other things that I found while healing her wounds."

Tōshirō blinked in surprise as Unohana reached down and pulled something out of a cabinet in her desk. She placed it onto the table, and apparently there were diagrams of all the muscles in the human body.

"While I was looking her over, I noticed that Aria Miyamoto bore several improperly healed scars all across her body," Retsu Unohana explained seriously. She pointed to a diagram, gesturing toward the backside. "She has several lacerations across her back, the largest being one that starts from the base of her neck and ends at her right hip." She slid her finger down the page to prove her point.

Tōshirō thought back to the scar he saw while he was carrying Aria. _Was that the scar that I saw?_ He asked himself. _And it's that large?!_

The other Soul Reaper's serene aura was replaced by one of solemnness. "It's not a particularly noticeable scar despite the size, but the problem is here." She poked a section of the diagram. "The scar cuts into these muscles here, which are also improperly healed and don't function quite well. I tried to repair the damage as much as I could, but it's been there for quite some time and it's almost irreversible."

"Don't… function quite well?"

"Yes. Apparently, the cut hit some nerve endings as well, and while it didn't cause enormous damage, they'll never quite work the same way. Tell me, does your third seat limp at times?"

"Not that I've noticed, no."

"Does she have issues with coordination?"

The young captain blinked again. "Well… Yes, actually. A lot of issues."

Unohana nodded absently. "I see. That is the effects of the torn muscles and nerves that I pointed out to you. Those muscles are connected to these," she jabbed the page again, toward the legs, "and those nerves are linked to those. Her legs can't move quite as well because of the harm done to those specific points."

_Well, that explains why she has such a hard time walking,_ Tōshirō thought.

"She has many others as well, and they spread across her entire body, mostly the back. The arms are mostly unscathed, except for some marks on the shoulders." Her hand swept across the entire picture in a general manner. "My guess is that those scars are about five to ten years old."

She stopped for a moment, to allow the other captain in the room to process this information. And he was doing just that.

_Five to ten years… What in the world…? What in the Soul Society has Miyamoto been put through?!_ Tōshirō thought frantically.

Unohana nodded her head. "You can see the problem. Apparently Miyamoto-san has been through much in the past decade or so."

Tōshirō couldn't explain the sudden brush of anger that swept through him when he thought of those wounds.

"While there were too many wounds to inspect fully, I can infer that most of them were caused from blades. Knives, swords… Anything along those lines."

_Is that why she took up swordsmanship? Because she wanted to defend herself?_

"I wouldn't be surprised if she acts scared after all that," Captain Unohana added softly. "She's still just a child… And back then she was even younger. I can't imagine the trauma she was put through."

Tōshirō stared at the floor, his eyes losing their iciness and figuratively boring holes into the floorboards. _She's not a child anymore,_ Tōshirō thought bitterly. _But is this why she's so sad all the time? No… There has to be more than that…_

"I suggest keeping an eye on her from now on, Captain Hitsugaya, even after her wounds are all healed," the serene woman said. "I'm no psychiatrist, but even I can tell that it's not a good idea to leave that girl alone… for more reasons than to keep her physically unharmed."

Tōshirō said nothing.

"Before we move on, I have a question for you." Her tone was suddenly a bit lighter than before. The young captain looked up, his gaze unfathomable. The woman took note of the look and something clicked within her insightful mind.

_I wonder…_

"I take it Miyamoto-san is currently your only third seat, correct?"

Tōshirō nodded mutely.

"Well, despite all that we've done, even after the Winter War, we still haven't managed to exterminate all the remaining Arrancar from Hueco Mundo. And because of that, our standards for seated officers have risen due to the fact that there's always a chance of encountering these beings while on missions in the world of the living."

The boy waited calmly, his frozen passion subdued for the moment.

"What I'm wondering is why you put Miyamoto-san in the position of third seat. I know her reiatsu levels are quite the spectacle, but I can tell just from the injuries she sustained from her battle with the Arrancar that she isn't exactly up to standard for that particular position. As a captain from another squad, I know it's incredibly rude for me to judge other squad's Soul Reapers, but I just can't help thinking that she'd be better off as fifth or sixth seat. I reviewed her records myself, and while I admire her skilled swordsmanship, I'm not sure if she's really suitable to be placed that high…" She trailed off, wondering if she went too far.

To her quiet relief, the boy captain shook his head pensively. "I should have known another captain would have caught it eventually," he admitted. "I'm not surprised that it was you, Captain Unohana. And it's not rude at all; all that you said is true. Aria Miyamoto is certainly not up to standard for the expectations of a third seat. It's just that…" He hesitated for a moment.

"Go on. Nothing that's said will leave this room. I guarantee that."

"Well… As you observed, ever since I met her I've known that she was keeping something hidden. A secret. I don't know how much of that secret has an influence over her, but… I acted on the spur of the moment, but at the time it seemed like a good plan. The reason behind her seating, Captain Unohana, is simply because I wanted to keep a close eye on her. No one would begrudge me spending a lot of time with my third seat, since it's so closely ranked to captain and lieutenant. If I had put her in the more suitable choice of fifth or sixth, it might have seemed suspicious if someone noticed that I spent a lot of time with her. She gets into so much trouble I just can't help but look out for her. If I don't… There's a very likely chance that she'll end up hurting someone… Or worse, herself."

All was silent, excluding the small noises coming from outside the office. Unohana nodded as she heard his answer.

"I see… It's a good plan. If I hadn't examined her myself I probably would not have figured it out…" She stared off in thought for a few moments.

"I suppose…"

"Captain Hitsugaya?"

The addressee looked up.

"I was wondering… Do you think you could send Aria Miyamoto up to me every now and then? I was thinking… It must be a handful keeping your eye on such a fiery subordinate by yourself. I could see her and teach her a thing or two, myself…"

Tōshirō arched a brow. "May I ask why?"

She fell silent again for a few moments. Folding her hands demurely, she set her chin atop of them and stared gravely at the captain across from her.

"This was also something I wanted to discuss… And it in part concerns your third seat."

The white-haired captain gazed back evenly, resorting back into his usual cold self.

"You see… For a while now, I've been having this feeling… I can't explain it, but I've been feeling as though something is stirring within the Soul Society…"

"A rebellion?" Tōshirō burst incredulously.

She shook her head. "No… Not like that. At the time, I was not expecting Aizen to turn on us like that… No, it's different this time. Something is stirring… And rising. Slowly, but surely. I cannot help but think that something is going to happen… I do not have anything to explain this suspicion, as I do not have any concrete evidence to support it, but still…" She sighed. "These days, we have to learn to trust what our instincts are telling us. You never know when…" Unohana looked out the open window.

Tōshirō exhaled steadily. He was surprised at the captain's words, but being a veteran Soul Reaper for centuries he decided to trust her. Still, the thought that something was going on in the Seireitei was unsettling. He'd be sure to keep an even closer on eye on Aria once she was out of the infirmary. He silently took up Unohana's offer to help, thinking that it couldn't hurt her, and Aria would probably learn a thing or two from the powerful captain.

"Well, she might be awake now," Unohana said abruptly, standing up in her chair. Tōshirō watched as she went over to the door. "Why don't we go see?"

The icy captain exhaled. "Alright then," he consented. "Let's go see her…"

***************

As soon as they had reached the outside of Aria's room, Unohana left the young captain, saying that she had other matters to attend to. Once she left, Tōshirō did not immediately enter the room; instead, he stood there quietly, contemplating the things that the veteran captain had said.

_Come to think of it, I'd been having a weird feeling during the entire mission…_

What in the Soul Society was going to happen?

He shook his snowy head, knowing that there were more important things at hand. Through the sliding door, he could easily hear Rangiku's loud, outspoken voice and barely pick up Aria's quiet, timid one.

_It sounds like she's awake now…_

Heaving a sigh, he grasped the handle and wrenched it open.

The door made a louder noise than he had expected, giving out a sharp crack as it vanished into the wall. He cringed at the sound, his eyebrow twitching. His lieutenant leaped up at the sound, turning towards him.

"Captain!" she cried.

Aria's reaction was the most memorable. She suddenly burst out from under the heavy covers, her eyes widening at the sight of her captain. Her whole body was tugged forward, however, including the hand that looked painfully full of needles.

"Captain, why are you—OUCH!! AW, BLOODY THORNS, THAT HURTS!" She howled as her hand jerked. Her face scrunched up as she tried to ease her hand.

Tōshirō stared in faint amusement, a smile tugging at the edges of his lips.

_She's so… klutzy._

But upon closer inspection of his subordinate, the feeling of mirth petered out.

The majority of Aria's left arm was bound in a heavy cast, her petite fingers barely able to move under it. Despite wearing the cotton slip that all recovering patients in the infirmary wore, he could see bandages around her neck that went down the slip. Her face had a sickly paleness to it and her snowy hair was tussled and mussed. There were large square patches over her cheeks, and in truth she didn't look much better than when he had first let Unohana treat her.

He refused to let his concern show, and instead he stepped into the room without much of a greeting. Aria sat on the bed, gently massaging her needled hand with a pained expression on her face. However, Tōshirō was surprised when he saw her smile at the sight of him.

"Um… Hi… Captain…" She greeted quietly, bowing her head slightly.

He wondered if she knew she was in trouble. He suddenly realized that she had never actually been noticeably formal with him; she had always been so timid and out of the way that he had simply interpreted it as respect.

He frowned, but wasn't overly angry about it. After all, he had dealt with a person like Rangiku all this time. In comparison, Aria was like a dog that would follow Tōshirō around, complying with every word he said.

At least, most of the time.

"Matsumoto, get out of here for a moment," he ordered. "I need to talk with Miyamoto for a bit."

Rangiku winced slightly at the tone of voice her captain was using but obeyed, exiting the room after giving Aria a kind pat on the head.

* * *

It was quiet in the room for a few moments. I had nothing to say, and I wondered why my captain was here in the first place. I doubted it was to be informed about my welfare; he didn't seem like the type. By now, I had completely remembered all the events that had happened days before. I quietly fingered the edges of my sheets, not knowing what to say. How do you casually thank a person who just saved your life?

"Are your injuries healing well?" he inquired stiffly. I jumped slightly, not expecting him to ask. When I looked at him, he looked rather uncomfortable.

"O-Oh, I'm ok…" I stuttered. I wanted to mentally smack myself; why couldn't I pull myself together when I was speaking with him?

"That's good to hear," he muttered softly—at least, that's what I thought he said.

I wanted to ask him if he was alright as well, but I kept my mouth tightly shut. It wasn't my place to ask. But I could tell just by looking at him; there wasn't a single scratch on him, no visible wounds whatsoever. He carried that same icy air about him like he always did.

_Amazing,_ I thought in awe.

I didn't notice until now that I had been staring intently at him for a few seconds. If I hadn't been so engrossed, I wouldn't have noticed the way he shifted minutely under my eyes.

"Do you know why I'm here, Miyamoto?" he asked flatly, staring at me with those sharp teal eyes.

I blinked. I hadn't really thought about why he was here until now… From his tone, it wasn't just to check up on me.

_It might have something to do with that incident a few days ago_, Kuro remarked.

"Do you?" he asked again, his tone getting stern.

"N-No," I replied quickly.

"Are you aware of what the creature you fought on that mission we were sent on was?"

"Um… Yes?"

"What was it?"

I was feeling embarrassed. He was beginning to sound like a teacher.

"An Arrancar, sir?"

He pursed his lips and nodded. "Yes, an Arrancar," he said, his voice a whisper. "I suppose you learned the basic details of an Arrancar at the Academy, correct?"

"Yes…"

His eyes then narrowed dangerously, and I could find a hint of anger beneath their cool surfaces.

"Then why, Miyamoto," he whispered, "did you fight her?"

I blinked again and opened my mouth, only to close it back up again.

I never really did have a good reason for fighting Loly… Even then I was aware that all my senses were telling me to run when I saw Nakajima being cut down. But I had felt so angry then that all that was put aside and I just attack her out of rage.

I glanced down at myself. My arm was in such a heavy cast that it would probably take weeks for it to heal. My torso area was feeling like someone had run over it with a boulder and my whole body ached.

_This is what I get for having a temper,_ I sighed in my head.

"I… was mad…" I tried to explain. Either way, I knew I was in trouble. Now I know what Captain Hitsugaya came here for.

"Having a temper doesn't give you the reason to attack one of the most dangerous creatures you'll ever face," he responded harshly.

I looked down at my hands… hand. I knew all too well the effects of having a fiery disposition…

The captain was trying to erase the harshness out of his voice. "Anyway… I can understand why you did it, Miyamoto… But please…" His voice returned to its soft whispers. I looked up timidly. His eyes were slightly narrowed, hiding an emotion I couldn't read. "Please… Next time…Think about what you're about to do before you do it."

I didn't know why, but I was suddenly blushing.

"Anyway," he coughed, returning to his icy tone. "Even though you acted on self-defense, I'm sure, you'll still receive punishment for acting so recklessly. You will be restricted to the barracks after you sign out from the infirmary, which means no visits outside of Seireitei even if you're accompanied by Matsumoto or other Soul Reapers. In a sense, it's like house arrest."

I slumped a little in my bed. I had to stay cooped up in here? That's just lovely.

"Three weeks," Captain said. "That's how long your restriction will be."

_And add that up with the time I'll be in the infirmary…_

I looked up as Captain Hitsugaya headed toward the door.

"Ah, wait!" I blurted out without thinking. He suddenly stopped, looking back at me with icy eyes.

"What?"

"Um, uh…"

Why, oh why did I have to suddenly call out to him? I didn't have anything to say at all… It was just a reflex. There was just something about him vanishing out the door that didn't seem very _complete_ to me, as though there was something that I had to do. As he continued to stare impatiently at me, I fidgeting and frantically tried to come up with something to say.

"Well, um, you see, uh…"

"If you don't have anything to say, then I'll just be leaving," Captain announced quietly. He pulled back the door and was about to head out when I finally came up with something to say.

"Th-Thank you!" I spluttered. "For saving my life!"

Again, he stopped, but it wasn't like the first time.

"You're the first person to ever really save me," I muttered quietly, my mind catching up with my mouth. "Thank you… so much." I wondered if he knew that it was more than just saving me from Loly that I was thanking him for.

He said nothing as he stepped serenely out the door. Right before he began to slide it closed, I heard him muttered softly,"I'll be waiting for you outside when you've recovered."

I swore I saw him smirk a little before the door completely hid him.

**

* * *

**

***UWAAAH!! I feel guilty now, I missed Aria's birthday (Dec. 17). Boo. That sucks big time.  
Aria: ...I...I really...I really don't care....  
Me: WAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!! FORGIVE ME, ARIA!! I'll get you a present, honest!  
Aria: ......

**_Critiquez, sil vous plait!_** **(Review, please!)**


	25. True Strength

*****Has it been a whole month? Hmm.... BWAHAHA!! I ACTUALLY UPLOADED THIS BEFORE A MONTH!! THAT'S GOT TO BE A RECORD!!  
Anyway, happy New Year's, everyone! It's a new decade! Do you think I could get this story finished this year? Who knows?**

**Again, much thanks to Mikomi-oneechan for helping me with this, along with all my precious readers, every single one! I love you all! If I could give you all a big bouquet of roses, I would.  
Hmm...Is this chapter kinda cheesy...? Hm. Maybe... We'll just see then, ne? (Updated 1/8/2010)**

* * *

I kept telling myself that I've had worse, but so far I'm not sold.

I was fully recovered now—if you count having an arm lodged in a chunky cast and having incredibly irritating headaches fully recovered. Luckily for me, my body was adept at healing and I somehow managed to recover from the broken rib and everything else quickly. The first moment I had, however, I begged them to let me out. The members of Squad 4 wanted me to stay longer—just as a precaution—but there was no way I was going to stay bedridden for another week or so if I could help it.

At least I had company. Who knew that some of the healers would be so friendly? Hanatarō Yamada was probably the one that I got along the best with. He may be a bit clumsy and absentminded at times, but he gave me company and he was a good person to talk to; he was even the first person I said goodbye to when I left the Squad 4 barracks.

While at first I was glad that I was out of that building, I was starting to regret it a bit.

Before I had left, the healers had grudgingly handed over a bottle of pills that I had to swallow periodically. Because of my previous… incident with medicine bottles, I was more than hesitant about taking it. But they absolutely insisted, saying that it would help with my headaches. And, since I didn't want to cause any trouble, I took it… Resentfully.

But that didn't mean I was having a good day.

My head felt like someone was on the inside pounding it with a hammer and my arm was burning up as if I was sticking it in an oven. In my pain, I had lost my medication temporarily, so my mood was getting sourer by the minute. So far I had snapped at six Soul Reapers, glared at twelve, and nearly lost my temper at five. How I was able to keep track of this was beyond me.

And the worst part of it was that I felt completely useless.

Because it was my left arm that was broken and because I was left-handed, I had to use my right, less dominant hand for the time being. And, to be frank, it sucked. I may have been good with my hands, but usually when I used my right hand it was in conjunction with my left; I hardly ever used it by itself. Writing was so much more difficult for me; it ticked me off so much that I could barely even hold the brush. It only added to my irritation—or was it my irritation that was adding more to my mess ups? Either way, anyone who had sense could tell that I was pissed.

Even Sawahata-kun was a bit cowed by my behavior. Every time I looked at him, he'd flinch and sort of scoot away from me. If I wasn't feeling so incredibly crappy I would have felt a little bit hurt about his reaction.

The only ones that weren't scared of me were Captain Hitsugaya and Rangiku-san. The lieutenant would sometimes look at me with an odd expression before going off and teasing me. The captain would raise an eyebrow at me and just go back to work. It was thanks to those two that I was able to somewhat retain my sanity.

It had already been over a week since I checked out of the hospital, and my head was addled enough to think that maybe it'd be a good idea to go back. Captain Hitsugaya allowed me a few moments of fresh air in an effort to clear my head, since he could probably see the maddened glint in my eyes at the absolutely furious task of writing. It helped a bit, since the stuffy atmosphere of a silent office wasn't making things better.

The fresh, crisp breeze managed to clear my head for a moment, as if it was blowing away all my troubles. The plants around me whispered encouragingly in my head and I slumped against the wall in an effort to relax. I cursed myself for having lost the bottle of medicine as I rested my head in my lap, trying to ease the pounding in my forehead. My right hand lazily drew circles in the grass as I felt the soft soil beneath.

These few moments of calm allowed me to think for a few moments. My mind idled for a few moments, lingering on the details of my fight with Loly over a week ago. My hand reached over and gently touched Kuro's hilt, which was unnaturally on my right shoulder instead of my left. It felt strange; I wasn't used to the weight shifted to my less used shoulder.

_I still think it'd odd, how you're not ambidextrous. I would have thought you'd have learned by now,_ Kuro remarked curiously_._ _Don't you think it'd be incredibly useful?_

_I never really found a reason to, until now…_

_It wouldn't hurt to try!_

She was right… I never thought I'd break my arm to such a degree that I couldn't use it at all… I'd been a bit too lazy on learning how to use my other hand just as well as the other. I placed my right hand in front of me and wiggled my fingers. Even though I had done other things with it, it felt rather strange.

_You think that's strange? Did you know a majority of people are right-handed?_

_You don't have to tell me something that's so blatantly obvious. I already know I'm weird. Even Hotaru-neesan was—_

I suddenly stopped myself. I forced myself, like slamming the breaks. I refused to think the rest of the sentence, instead opting to shut my eyes tight and burying my face into my cast. I won't go there, I won't go there…

Kuro regarded me with sadness. _Even now, you still see her as your sister…_

_No!_

I denied that fact. I wanted to ignore it. Every time she said that, I wanted to rip up whatever I had in my hands until I calmed down. I felt like tearing my hair out.

_No matter how you see it, you can't deny your ties…_

_No, no, no, NO!_

Despite having only one useable hand, I buried my face further into my arm, using my right hand to cover my ear.

My hair ribbons, which I had received back from Rangiku-san, were loosely tied because of my current disability. Thus, my reiatsu sometimes leaked if I wasn't paying attention. While I was getting the hang of it, it still required me to be constantly aware of my reiatsu levels. My cranky mood made my head twist every little emotion into a negative one, and I felt even more useless because I couldn't match up to normal Soul Reapers.

Because of that, I could feel vines emerging and flailing around me. They snaked around me, not in a menacing way, almost as if in comfort. Even the grass was reacting; they fluttered in the wind, their chatter growing louder and louder in my head.

"No, no, no!" I whispered fiercely. I had worked hard for this—there was no way I would lose this fight!

I struggled to calm myself, taking deep breaths. My arm was shaking at the effort, but eventually it only receded back to the occasional tremor. I slumped even more ungracefully against the wall and stared listlessly ahead.

_It's been so long since you've seen her, _Kuro mused. _I wonder…_

I said nothing.

I wondered if Kuro really truly saw my sister the same way I do. She had never met her in person, going only by the old memories within my head. For the first time, I questioned this. How would she know how it felt to have a person always be watching over you, to be by your side unwaveringly, to guide you in the right direction but not force you?

I didn't want to think about her like this. Her betrayal had twisted my heart into a million directions and then shattered it. If I let myself dwell on it too much, eventually I wasn't able to feel my chest at all. As if she had stolen it as she had disappeared from my life as well.

In my frustration I suddenly rose, ignoring the throbbing pains in my head. I awkwardly reached over and grabbed Kuro's hilt and pulled it out with some difficulty. The long sword—which was so familiar to me before—felt incredibly foreign in my hand.

I didn't care. I found a battered tree stump nearby and raised my hand high above my head. The katana swung down with a swift whoosh and cut into the wood, lodging itself in it. I hissed in annoyance, trying to pry it away. My right hand was just so weak in comparison to my left—I might have been able to completely cut it in half if it were in the other hand…

Kuro came out roughly and I brought her down again, this time in a less rough cut. And again. And again.

It was difficult, trying to get a grip on the sword. I felt like I was just beginning to learn all over again. I couldn't hold it like I would in my left—this hand was completely different; I would never be able to tell if I was holding it the same way or not. Nevertheless, with each swing I adjusted my grip, trying to get a feel for it.

I wasn't sure how long I had stayed out there, assaulting the log. It was now mottled with rough cuts and slashes and was the complete opposite of a work of art. My right arm, normally unused, was weak from the work I put on it. I realized that my grip was so tight that my hand was bleeding.

"This'll never bloody work," I muttered. Gingerly placing my blade on the ground, I tried to wipe the blood from my hand on the grass; the crisp texture stung my hand. Instinctively, I withdrew it, holding it as a fist against my chest. I didn't care about the thick liquid dripping on my uniform.

_Why the sudden cutting frenzy?_ Kuro inquired.

_I… I feel… I just…_

_Yes…?_

_I just feel so damn useless!_

In my sudden explosion of emotion, I punched my already-wounded hand into the stump, causing the outside to bruise. Whimpering, I clenched it reflexively, which only caused more bleeding.

"I can't do anything right," I whispered to no one in particular. "I can't control my own anger, I can't fight… I can't even do the things I'm best at!"

Anguish boiled my blood as I gripped my shihakushō. I couldn't be feeling any worse now—there was just so much going on in my head. Pain, irritation, anguish, guilt… It was a wonder how my skull hadn't exploded from all that pent up emotion. My chest felted like a snake was constricting around it—as if it wanted to squeeze what little life there was left in me.

I realize now that, even though I had defeated Loly, I had not fulfilled any goal. I may have learned the Youkou Oshaku, but there was nothing really special about that because I might have learned anyway—or even earlier. What had I gained from my battle with her? Broken bones, and a tale to boast? No, those won't worth anything. What I was really after was to simply save that boy, Nakajima. Captain Hitsugaya was right—there was no point in fighting her; he was already dead. Had I gotten stronger after my fight with the Arrancar? I didn't think so.

There really was no point in my being here; I was only being a burden to everyone. I should just give up now, while I still have the chance…

_ARIA MIYAMOTO!!_

Kurobararyu's beastly roar shook me to my core, making me jump. I mentally cringed at my sword's ferocity.

However, I felt her drift away from me, as if we were disconnecting. Curious, I followed her, my mind sinker deeper and deeper as we neared the very core of my soul. I finally realized where we were going and I shut my eyes.

I felt a strange, distant tug and almost felt myself lurch. It was almost as if my mind had rolled in on itself. There was only darkness for several moments, and I waited.

At last I felt myself settle. My eyes still closed, I wiggled my body just as a safeguard. Then, cautiously, I peeled my eyes open, one by one.

I was familiar with this place. The sky was dark, blotted with gray clouds that covered the dull shining of the moon. The lackluster sheen sent bits and pieces of rays across the landscape, giving it a rather eerie appearance. I was a field of some sorts; there was a large grass plain that extended forever. Trees decorated the environment, mostly of the same size. Roses were also scattered across the ground, all the same size but in a variety of colors.

And yet at the same time, it all looked the same.

The blocked moonlight gave the entire setting a ghostly appearance, as though someone had sucked all light out. There were no stars in sight against the cold, barren firmament. The whole scene was cast in a griseous glow that made everything look black and white, almost nothing in between. A complete grayscale.

No color.

This is what my inner world looked like.

I shivered involuntarily, hugging myself. I had forgotten how chilly this place looked, even though the real temperature was nothing of the sort. If anyone else saw this, they would probably immediately turn back, never to return.

I had never felt a desire to return either.

I glanced around, taking in the monochrome area. Carefully, I stepped forward, forcing my arms behind my back. This was my inner world; I had no need of feeling insecure here.

As I walked, I listened. Not only was there hardly any color here, there was also very little sound. The only noise I could procure was the soft padding of my feet against the barren grass. Other than that, there wasn't much else. No wind, no murmurs, no sign that showed that there was anything lively here.

At last, I found what I was looking for. Amid the grass was a huge patch of roses, all clustered together in one large colony. I could barely tell that they were red, thanks to lack of good light. Slowly I bent down next to one rose, eyeing it carefully. From the outside, it looked like any other budded rose—red, curled up. But I knew better than that.

I extended a finger and touched it very gently.

The entire garden of roses suddenly came alive, flurrying about like a rogue whirlwind. I blocked my eyes with my arms so that I wouldn't get anything in them. I could feel the rose petals brushing against my skin as they blew past me.

At last, everything seemed to settle. Cautiously, I moved my arms away from my face and blinked.

Towering a few feet above me was the body of a dragon. Her neck was black with purple tints, embellished with various red stripes all the way up her head. Her face was a long tear-drop shape, like a horse's. She had a mane of rose petals that was almost as long as her neck. Her legs couldn't be seen at all, as they were being shielded by wings—also made of what seemed like thousands of rose petals—and had a very wide wing span. However, her tail was far from invisible—thick as a tree trunk, it had the same coloring as her neck and protruding from the end were several long, bright red spikes.

I looked up in awe.

"Kuro—"

Out of nowhere, the dragon let loose a mighty roar, beating her rosy wings and sending fierce gales blasting past me. As the wind whipped my face, I fell backwards with a squeak, surprised at her reaction. When the winds had stopped, Kurobararyu arched her long neck downwards, until her vibrant ruby-red eyes were only inches away from my face.

"Do not speak," her resonating, feminine voice ordered. "Do not say a word and listen to what I have to tell you, Aria Miyamoto."

I stared up at her in shock. I had never before seen her so incensed before. What had I said before to make her so angry? I was only expressing what was only true…

Kuro snorted in what seemed like disgust, backing her head away from me.

"Pathetic," she scoffed. "To think my wielder would end thinking such pitiful thoughts. Pull yourself together!"

She bellowed once more and I skittered away, not wanting to be in the way of her wrath. Kurobararyu was my zanpakutō; of course she'd inherit her temper from me. The only difference was that she didn't try to hold back when she was angry…

The great dragon floated above the ground, pacing. My body was tense, ready to jump away if need be.

"All these years," she growled. "All these years I've seen what was within your heart, Aria. You and I've gone through much together, and I have suffered along with you, because I am your zanpakutō. But never, never have I seen such cowardice like this!" To prove her point, her tail thumped against the ground, sending small tremors through the earth.

"You tell me there's no point in you fighting. You say that you're useless, that you're just a burden to everyone around you," she snarled. "Are you telling me that you're just going to give up?!"

Too startled to answer, I swallowed. Kuro once again snorted in contempt.

"Don't even answer that—I already know your answer."

She continued to pace, snarling things to herself. I used this time to try to pull my mind together.

Was this why she had brought me here? Because she was angry at my previous feelings? I… don't understand…

"Of course you don't!" she snapped at me. "That's because your mind is clouded by your foolish emotions!" She wheeled onto me again, her head shooting out towards me. I had to duck into the ground to avoid touching her. Her ruby eyes stared at me with an admonishing glare.

"What is it that makes you think you're so useless?"

"I…" No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't break away from her gaze. "I… just can't do anything right… I couldn't save Nakajima and I almost died myself… I can't control my anger, no matter how much I try… It's been so long…" Why continue to do something that would just come to nothing?

I felt movement close to me and screamed, moving out of the way just barely before Kuro's barbed tail came crashing down on me. I stood up and glared at her.

"_Are you out of your bloody mind?!_" I screamed.

"_I don't know, am I?! Or are you?!_" She roared back.

"Why the hell did you bring me here if you were just going to kill me?!"

"To knock you to your senses!"

Her tail whipped out at me again and I quickly lunged out of the way. If I wasn't so angry at her actions, I would have been frightened of the razor-sharp spikes on her tail.

"You say you're useless and that you can't even do anything right! Do you know why?!" she bellowed, lashing out again. I ducked, her tail whistling over my head. I prepared myself as it began to catapult back.

"It's because you've never even tried! You're so stuck on the past that you've doomed your own future!" Her head suddenly shot down, fangs bared. Her teeth barely grazed the edges of my hair as I hurried away.

"Aria Miyamoto, your heart tells me that you want to be normal, and you want everyone to stop looking at you like a monster! You want to stop all the pain and suffering—the misery of loneliness that resides in your spirit! Tell me, Aria, how can you do that if you just _give up_?!"

Her tail was too fast this time. It collided with my side, causing me to wince at the sheer weight of the appendage. It wrapped around me for a moment, before flinging me to the ground the next.

"You want to just sit there, while they jeer and bombard you with their accusations? If you give up, Aria Miyamoto, then it will never stop! Are you going to throw away all that you've worked for away, just like that?!"

I flinched as I processed her words. Faces flashed through my head: Rangiku-san, Sawahata-kun, Kozue, and… Captain Hitsugaya…

Was I really ungrateful enough to throw them away just in the first few months I've known them?

"What are you afraid of? Losing to the anger that you call a curse?!"

I flinched again, struck by her words, which allowed her to smack me again with her tail.

"If you're so scared, Aria, then fight! Fight and become stronger! So that one day, you will be faced with that same curse and crush it with your own fist! Fight, so that one day you won't be the one to hurt your friends—you'll be the one who protects them!"

Vines suddenly shot out from her wings and charged towards me. Still recoiling from the thorough lashing I had just received, I wasn't quick enough to avoid being bound in several vines. As hard as I struggled, I couldn't escape as Kurobararyu reeled me in and stared at me, her face only inches from mine.

"If you cannot protect them, swear upon your soul what must be done to do so! Do not hang your head in shame and call yourself useless! Pick up your head and glare in defiance at the world, to show them that you are not weak! Scream to them that you will not bow before their words, because they have no control over you! Show them how strong you truly are!"

By now, I had stopped my thrashing. I had ceased all movement, except for the heavy rising of my chest. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't break away from my zanpakutō's soulful glower. Her crimson orbs bore into me, sending me silent yet urgent messages.

"That is the kind of person I know you are, Aria," she whispered. "That is the person I saw when you summoned me. That is why I chose you."

I had completely fallen silent—even my pants had ceased. Because our little tussle had momentarily ended, my inner world had once again fallen silent. All that passed was the occasional flicker of monochrome light.

Seeing that I was not able to give an answer, Kuro backed away and placed me gently back on the earth. I sensed no ill intent from her as she relinquished me from her plant cage. Staring unseeingly at the distance, I barely acknowledged her as she craned her neck away, bringing our faces close once again.

"Those are my words for you, my master," she said gently. "I can sense someone approaching us, so you should leave now. I'll let you contemplate your answer when you get back."

Her wings gave one push, and she withdrew from me. Her neck curled inwards as she began folding her rose wings.

"Goodbye, Aria."

All of a sudden, I was once again enveloped in a tornado of rose petals and a bright light pierced my eyes. I barely had time to shut my eyes before I was pulled in.

The next thing I knew, I was once again stable, staring at a marled tree stump. My hand was still bleeding and I was still sitting in the grass. I had broken into a cold sweat and there were goose bumps running along my arms. My head bent forward as I started to breathe heavily.

"Fight," I muttered to myself. "I have to fight…?"

I knew what Kuro meant by her message. To be able to overcome this great obstacle before me, I had to get stronger. Giving up would get me nowhere—it might even make things worse. But how do I get stronger without hurting the ones closest to me…?

Images from my past flashed through my mind, and my wounded hand clenched. My sword's words rang through my head.

_If you're so scared, Aria, then fight! Fight and become stronger! So that one day, you will be faced with that same curse and crush it with your own fist! Fight, so that one day you won't be the one to hurt your friends—you'll be the one that protects them!_

All my life, I had been controlled by my anger. It had dominated my life—it sent me fleeing from it in terror and made me do its dirty work. I was its slave, and it laughed at me, mocking me. I could almost hear it whispering in my ear, telling me that I couldn't do it, that it was my master and that I'd always be in its grasp…

My fingers squeezed even harder, despite my hand screaming in protest.

"I… I don't… I don't want it to happen again…" I admitted to myself. "I don't… want to hurt people… I don't want to be alone again… Never again…"

Loneliness was probably the most terrible emotion there was. It was indescribable, the way it engulfed you and left you in such obscurity. It took everything away from you, all feelings and control, and threw you away just to feed on later. It was like a wall that separated you from anyone else, enticing you closer and closer, only to shatter you by taking it away just when you were about to touch. That feeling of loss was beyond words.

But for once, it hadn't done its job. I did have something, right here, in the Gotei 13. I really did have everything I needed, right in front of my eyes… It's just I had to work harder for the bigger things I wanted.

Gingerly, I reached over and grasped my katana's hilt, dripping with my blood. After wiping the handle clean, I quickly sheathed it. With some difficulty, I adjusted the position Kurobararyu was in, slinging the red sash she was included with over my bloodied shoulder, which left her resting against my left hip. Awkwardly, I moved my cast as well.

I wouldn't let it control me, these feelings. I was their master, and I would control them however I wanted. I refused to lose.

I made a promise to myself that I wouldn't. A vow upon my very soul, just like Kuro said. But… Could I keep it?

"Faith," I whispered. "I just need… to _believe_…"

But could I do it? I had never had much faith in myself to begin with. Changing my ways would be tough…

I blinked. I had just felt some reiatsu approach. Could it be…?

My head swiveled, and sure enough, there stood Captain Hitsugaya, leaning against a tree with a stern look on his face. I watched as his eyes flickered toward my bleeding hand, and then narrowed.

With a sigh, he walked towards me, a look of disapproval on his handsome features. He crouched down next to me and eyed me.

"It seems like every time I find you, Miyamoto, you end up hurt one way or another," he muttered. "Must I always babysit you? You're just like a child…"

My eyebrows drew together, but I didn't say anything. He sighed again before reaching into his pocket. Curiously, I watched as he extracted a roll of bandages and some antiseptic from his hakama.

"I guess it was a good idea to come prepared, then."

With surprisingly incredible gentleness, he slipped his hand beneath mine and lifted it. His cool touch felt soothing against my throbbing skin. Scrutinizing my wound, his mouth pulled downwards, but nonetheless he took some of the antiseptic and began rubbing it over it. I winced at the stinging, but didn't back away.

"When I tell you a few moments, Miyamoto, I mean a few moments," he chastised. "When you didn't come back, I thought…" He stopped there, but from the tightness of his lips and furrowed brow, I could tell what he was thinking. I don't know why, but my heart warmed a few degrees.

"So… You were… worried about me?" I asked in a soft voice, touched.

"No," he replied, a bit too quickly. I smiled a little as I felt his fingers twitch minutely, another sign he was lying.

I wouldn't admit it out loud, but I liked the feeling of his hand on mine. It gave me reassurance. About what, I didn't know, but for some reason… I just felt safe around him. Even if I was alone, somehow I had a feeling that he was still looking out for me. This feeling of security was very precious to me; I hadn't felt anything like it in what seemed like ages.

As he was wrapping the dressing around my hand, a question was bubbling on my lips. Kurobararyu's words echoed through my thoughts and I began to ponder some things.

"Captain?" I called quietly.

"Hmm?"

"I have a question…"

"I'm listening."

I smiled again. That was Captain Hitsugaya for you—short, quick to the point.

"How do you do it?" I asked, looking off into the trees. His tender hands continued their work unhindered.

"Do what?"

"Since you're a captain, obviously… You've seen and been in a lot of battles… And I don't have a doubt that you've seen your friends fall, too… I was just wondering… How do you go on? Seeing them being cut down, one by one… How can you still go on without a thought? How does that not bother you?"

He knew what I was getting at. His hands suddenly stopped and he seemed to unconsciously wrap his fingers around my hand as he stared intently into space. I gazed at him attentively, waiting for a response.

It had been bugging me for a while now. Anyone could easily tell how much it bothered me whenever I saw a comrade fall in battle; that kind of incident would easily break me apart. So how was it possible that all these Soul Reapers, no matter if they were a captain or not, could keep going and hold themselves together?

"Soul Reapers," Captain whispered. "_Shinigami_, angels, psychopomps, whatever you want to call us… Either way, we're all the same: creatures that guide lost souls to the afterlife."

I nodded uncertainly, not really sure what he was getting at.

"Humans all say that we rule death; they say that we can bend it to our rules—that we deem whoever lives or dies… That we are immune to death itself. But, really… That's not true. In the grand scheme of things, we are still slaves of death.

"In actuality, we're not gods; we don't have powers that can bend reality. We have to follow strict rules ourselves, or else everything will be thrown out of balance. And most importantly, we can die ourselves.

"You're still new to this, Miyamoto, I know. You've never seen a friend get killed right before your eyes in battle… Before now. And, trust me; you will never forget your first time."

He finished binding my hand and patted it gently, making sure all was secure. But he didn't remove his hold; it lingered, like his words.

"We're not that different from humans ourselves; we form bonds with other, we can eat, sleep, move… and fight. Most of all, we can feel emotions… Sadness, anger, _love_… All of it."

I still wasn't sure where he was going with all of this. I already knew this, maybe better than most…

My captain sensed my impatience and sighed. "You want to know how we can stand losing those that are close to us? Well, let me tell you something, Miyamoto… We don't."

My eyes widened in disbelief.

"But… That can't be true… You're still sane, you're still in control, and you don't show anything…" He…

He still had his friends…

"Just because we don't show anything doesn't mean it's not there."

I stared, and he stared back. Once again I was struck by that icy sharp gaze. I could feel my cheeks heating up under his scrutinizing look. Seeing my discomfort, Captain Hitsugaya blinked, softening his expression. He continued to look at me with half-lidded eyes. There was something in them that I just couldn't place, something that I was familiar with, but couldn't name…

"Emotions, like loss and pain, never truly go away," he explained, brushing my hand in comfort. He adjusted his position, opting to sit next to me, so close that our sleeves were touching. He still gripped my hand.

"They're still there, only buried deep in your soul, and only resurface under the right conditions. Though, regardless, they're there. The scars of the heart never truly disappear…

"…But, still…"

"But, still…?"

"But, still, even if they are there and we can still feel them, that doesn't mean we should let them rule our lives."

I gave him a confused and slightly awed look.

"The way I see it… If things like pain keeps on holding onto you like that, then you'll never truly move forward in your life. If you keep thinking about what you did wrong that day, on the day your friend died, then you'll just keeping doing it over and over again. You'll only lose more that way.

"The only way to really 'get over it,' as some would put it, is to put those things behind you. To look at that day and realize your mistakes, yes, but also to learn from them. You have to promise yourself never to do it again, and to do that… You have to get stronger. Strong enough so that you won't ever lose someone ever again…"

He looked down for a moment at the ground and his mouth turned downwards. His fingers tightened around my hand, and in a sudden moment I could tell what that expression was.

"You… You lost someone, didn't you?" I asked tentatively. What I meant to say was that he had lost someone close to him. I knew that look; I saw it every day when I looked at my own face.

Loss. That was what I saw. And… Even a hint of sadness.

He firmly ignored me. "Do you know how the captains got to where they are today?" he asked. I shook my head.

"It's because we were the ones who were able to move on. The ones strong enough to put all of those negative feelings behind us and truly learn from our mistakes."

"Truly learn from your… mistakes…?"

"After every mistake, we learn something. Not everyone can do that: take something after every single thing. That's how we are and how we get to be where we are. No matter what our burden was, we didn't let anything stop us from getting up… Not words, not actions…"

"But… How…?"

"Faith… You need to have the real strength to believe in your ability to move on; to keep going under all that emotional weight… That is what strength is."

I looked down. I wanted to be strong… But it sounded hard…

"But… I… How…?"

"I never said you had to keep all of those feelings inside for yourself," he remarked mysteriously. He gave me a sidelong glance. "Friends… are around for a reason, you know."

I pouted. "I know that," I murmured.

"Do you really, Miyamoto?"

I stared at him again, trying to decipher the message behind those bright aqua eyes of his. As usual, they gave away nothing.

He exhaled. "You'll understand as time goes by. I'm not really surprised that you don't right now." He stood up, releasing his hold on me. I flushed. Was he implying something here?!

"No matter how bad things are, you just have to move on. You really won't live if you don't."

I raised an eyebrow, and he rolled his eyes.

"Alright, we're technically not alive, but you get my point."

I wasn't sure I had gleaned anything from this little conversation of ours. In fact, I think I just got ten percent dumber.

"So… Summarize what you just explained again?"

Captain Hitsugaya gave me a lame look. "If you can't learn to move on, you'll be so stuck in the past that you'll end up doing the same mistakes over and over. You have to have the heart to move past these mistakes and actually learn things from them, no matter how tiny."

My head was starting to hurt.

He reached over and abruptly flicked my forehead. "It means that if you want yourself to suffer, you'll suffer, and I won't be around to get you out of it. If you want to be pitiful and drown yourself in your own personal tar pit, be my guest."

Now he was being plain obnoxious.

"So let me get this straight…" I said through clenched teeth. "I have to move on… From everything?"

He nodded.

"Like… Charging at a Hollow from the front?"

A nod.

"Accidentally firing a kidō spell at your superior?"

Nod.

"Tripping with a knife in your hand?"

A twitch of the head. I took that as a yes.

"Eating a cream pie on a unicycle through a herd of elephants while it snowed and juggling fire torches in one—"

His hand suddenly clamped down onto my mouth. "Enough. You get the point."

I smiled in a goofy manner under his palm.

"Must be delirious or something…" he muttered to himself. He took his hand away and turned around.

"Come on. We should get back inside."

"Just one more question, Captain."

He looked at me in exasperation.

"Please?"

He sighed. "Go on."

"Do you… believe in me?"

He gave me a surprised blink. "What?"

"Do you believe in me? In… In my strength?"

He thought about it for a moment, looking off into the distance. My bandaged hand clenched. I had to know if he thought I was a lost cause or not. Because if he did, then…

"You have a unique power, Miyamoto," he said out of the blue. "I've never quite seen a person manipulate plants the way you do… Or control fire, either, if that's what it is…"

Was that supposed to be a compliment?

"It's unique… Special…" He absentmindedly reached out and picked up my wounded hand. He stroked it with his thumb, and I couldn't help but feel a little bit… odd.

"I believe in your ability to move on, Aria Miyamoto," he muttered. "I know… That somewhere… You have the heart to move on. That's what I believe." He gave me an intense stare and I shifted nervously. His grip tightened and instead of feeling chills, I felt…warmth.

Why is it that I had the feeling that he was trying to tell me something?

"Come on, let's go in," he announced. He immediately dropped my hand and it felt strangely empty. "We should get some ice for that hand…"

He started walking, but upon realizing that I wasn't following him, he stopped.

"What are you waiting for? Get a move on, Miyamoto."

My eyes were glued to the ground. My zanpakutō's words, along with my captain's, repeated themselves in my head.

_If you cannot protect them, swear upon your soul what must be to do so! Do not hang your head in shame and call yourself useless! Pick up your head and glare in defiance at the world, to show them that you are not weak! Scream to them that you will not bow before their words, because they have no control over you! Show them how strong you truly are! That is the kind of person I know you are, Aria. That is the person I saw when you summoned me. That is why I chose you._

_I believe in your ability to move on, Aria Miyamoto. I know… That somewhere… You have the heart to move on. That's what I believe._

They believed.

My heart suddenly gave a flighty thump and my head suddenly became slightly clearer.

I suddenly felt a gentle tug on my sleeve and realized that Captain Hitsugaya was calling to me.

"Wake up, sleepyhead," he muttered, not unkindly. With a smile, I reached up and slipped my fingers between his, interlocking our hands. Captain blinked in surprise.

"Ok, I'm coming," I mumbled.

My captain gave me an odd glance before turning around and pulling my hand. My eyes were cast downwards as we both walked among the quiet halls of Squad 10.

"I'll do it," I whispered.

"Did you say something?"

I didn't answer, opting to continue staring at my marching feet. I concentrated on my captain's gentle hand that firmly led me around corners. The hand that I trusted, that would guide me wherever I needed to go.

_I'll do it. I'll get stronger, so I won't hurt anyone else…_

I chanted this like a mantra, trying to get the idea printed in my head. I want to get stronger… I want to get stronger…

_For Captain… For Rangiku-san… For me…_

I closed my eyes.

_For everyone._

**_

* * *

_**

_***CHEESINESS FOR THE WIN!! _Eheh. Rukia would be proud. *stars in eyes*  
Rukia: No, no, no! You can't do it like that! You have to use more air so you can scream louder to get your point across!! Right from the stomach, see?  
Me: Oooh.... *scribbles down notes*

Ooh, ooh, and before I forget, I received a fanfic as a gift from my beta and I'm freaking obsessing over it, teehee. It has Aria in it and I love it, so check it out! It's in my favorites and the title is "Painful Departure, Horrifying Return." Read and leave a review, please? Oh, and speaking of recommendations, there's also another Bleach fic that I like very much, written by the epic Lord Slayer, called "Bleach: The Time Capsule Wars." Must be the funniest Bleach fic I've ever read... (I really hope you two forgive me for recommending your fics without asking... I forgot to ask...Fail...) So R&R?

.....Review?


	26. Aconite

*****Ack! I'm sorry this is so late! There were some...technical issues regarding this chapter, so I apologize for the long wait. Thanks once more to the lovely Mikomi-oneechan for looking over this for me! Love you, Miko!**

**Just for the record, we've now entered the part of the story that's getting a bit slow and more character-developed, so don't expect action for a couple of chapters. And if you're reading this, Lord Slayer, I just want to say that _no, _I'm not copying you. It was already in my mental plotline.  
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**There are several reasons for me writing this chapter, but the main reason is that it features the return of a character I've sadly neglected for the past few chapters. Right now, I'm apologizing profusely to said character, but there really wasn't a place to fit him in. If at first you really have no idea who I'm talking about when you get to that part in the chapter, refer back to the end of Chapter 9. **

**There are some things in this chapter that I'm expecting a bunch of reviews about... Oh boy I'm really looking forward to those...Oh yeah, and just as a reminder, page breaks (or those gray lines/horizontal rulers) mean POV changes. Just wanted to make that clear so that I don't have people telling me how confusing it is for them. Again, I'm sorry. I wasn't thinking when I started this story, unfortunately, and I sort of regret writing this in first person. Oh well. Too late to change it now. Anyway, the authoress will now be quiet and let you read. (And a warning: the ending author's note is rather long, but I suggest reading it, but only if you want to.)  
**

**(Posted 2/22/2010)  
**

* * *

The thick smell of pine flooded my nose as I hurried along a small, rugged path. I tried as best as I could to run down the shallow hill without tripping. Part of me wanted to turn back, but most of me rebelled against the idea. I resisted the urge to cry the small amount of tears that stung the edges of my eyes.

I had told Captain Hitsugaya that I was going for a run by myself. Biting my lip, the scene continued to replay itself over and over in my head.

"You can't go," he had protested. "You're still in recovery. You shouldn't be running around like that."

I grimaced slightly, not expecting him to disagree so quickly. But I had to try since I received the message. "But I can't stay cooped in here for too long; didn't Captain Unohana say that some fresh air was good for me? It wouldn't hurt."

"I don't think she said that. I clearly remember she told me to keep a close eye on you."

"But staying cooped up in here is only going to make me even crazier, and who knows what could happen?"

He twitched, remembering. "It's too cold. You'll freeze," he countered.

"I'll bring a jacket."

"What if someone attacks you? You'll be all by yourself."

"B-but who would want to attack me? I'm just a little girl; I don't have anything anyone would want."

"You'd be surprised…"

He was getting me a little frightened. Maybe I shouldn't go after all… No. I had to.

"Be reasonable, Captain, there's no need to worry. I'll bring Kurobararyu, just in case. Will that make you feel better?"

I didn't even have confidence in my own words. My swordsmanship hadn't improved very much in the last few days. Captain Hitsugaya had temporarily put off my reiatsu training and now aimed to teach me swordsmanship. But my right hand was being downright impossible; every night it seemed to throb even harder because of all the times I had dropped it and it didn't look like I was progressing at all. Even my captain seemed a little bit tired of it.

Captain Hitsugaya gave me a lame look. "Right, Miyamoto, you'll use your sword to defend yourself." He huffed and rubbed the bridge of his nose. I gnawed on my lip, desperately trying to figure out a way to leave. I couldn't be late…

"I can still use kidō," I offered. "I don't always rely on my sword, you know."

Captain's hand covered his eyes, but I could see the way he pressed his lips together. I wasn't sure if I was winning this argument or not. After all, he was my captain; he could order me about and make me do whatever he wanted to without a worry.

"You can't run. You'll trip," he said out flat. I couldn't detect a hint of humor behind his cold tone. He moved his fingers so I could see a glimpse of his beautiful turquoise eyes.

My cheeks flushed as I forced a smile. "Th-Then I won't run. I'll walk. That isn't illegal, is it?"

He stared at me for a long time. I tried to hide my trembling right arm behind my back. Lately it seemed as though he was getting moodier and moodier—the last thing I wanted was for him to explode on me.

I heard him let out a slow, bated breath. "Fine then. You can go."

My face brightened immediately and I was about to thank him when he opened his mouth again.

"But I'm coming with you."

My happy gratitude caught in my throat and, before I could think properly, I was shaking my head.

"N-No! You can't come!" I found myself saying.

Regardless of my protest, Captain Hitsugaya stood up and adjusted the haori draped on his shoulders. As he pushed his sleeves this way and that, I couldn't help but admire his slender but firm arms. I shook my head again, trying to clear it.

"What's wrong? It's just a walk," he remarked nonchalantly, still making no move to sit down.

"I thought I could have the privilege of going alone," I tried to say as respectfully as I could. Still, there was a limited amount you could say politely through clenched teeth.

His eyes wheeled on me, and I was again struck by his sharp, icy gaze. It felt almost as if he was probing my thoughts, trying to figure out what I was up to.

"I refuse to leave you alone, Miyamoto. You're letting me come with you, and that is an order."

I ground my teeth in frustration. He was being overly difficult about this!

"Don't I get any privacy anymore? I think I still have my basic rights." I was really beginning to grasp at straws now. I tried not to think about how I was disobeying a direct order from my superior.

His eyes narrowed severely and he turned his glare onto full power. Trying my best not to be cowed, I stared back just as strongly.

"Aria Miyamoto," he uttered dangerously. I resisted the urge to cringe. The only time he ever said my full name was when he was being very serious. "If you don't happen to remember, the last few times I left you by yourself you either got yourself in a whole heap of trouble that I had to pull you out of, you got hurt, or both! I'd prefer for that not to happen again."

For the first time that night, my temper flared as I began to truly react to his words. What did he think I was, a baby? I could protect myself perfectly well!

"I can take care of myself just fine," I growled back. My right hand, now out of bandages, clenched. "I never asked for your help."

"Yes, but if I didn't come to you, you'd be dead," he retorted hotly. Taken aback, I narrowed my eyes and downright glowered at him.

"You never had to come and help me!"

"You're right. Maybe I shouldn't have. Then I wouldn't be dealing with this! I'm coming with you, and that's—"

I shook my head furiously, the room spinning wildly. "NO!" I cried. "You can't come! How many times do I have to tell you that!? I just want some time to myself and that's that! There is absolutely no need for you to get involved, so stop butting into my business! No one asked for your opinion!"

I didn't have time to regret my words. As I finished my sentence, Captain Hitsugaya seemed to come alive. His eyes widened and then narrowed, his icy blue eyes firing metaphorical blizzards my way. His fist clenched dangerously and he walked up to me like a storming bull. His mouth pulled back into a sneer as he stared right into my eyes.

"Your business is my business!" he thundered. Although the volume of his voice had not risen significantly, the tone of it nearly sent me cowering in terror. "But I can see why it shouldn't be! I try to help you, Miyamoto—but no, you just have to push me aside anytime you feel like it! Now that I think about it, I don't even know why I bothered in the first place! This is a complete waste of my time! In fact, you are a complete waste of my time, Aria Miyamoto! I can't believe I spent all this time worrying my head off over a person like you! I don't know why I was even bothered to help you train when I can see that this is going nowhere—nowhere at all! You're not getting any further and I feel downright idiotic for not having seen that in the first place! I'd be a complete dumbass to let this go on any further! Why should I help you when you don't even seem to want to give me the time of day?! Why should I help a girl who can't even get a grip on her own damned sword?! You are an utter waste of time and space, Miyamoto! Useless! Completely useless! I could be doing much better things than to have to deal with a hopeless case like you! If you want to get rid of me, then fine! Go ahead and let your reiatsu run rampant! I couldn't care less if people hate you! YOU CAN GO ROT ALONE IN A DITCH FOR ALL I CARE!"

He stopped, his chest heaving up and down. His fierce gaze continued to stare down on me with the exact same infuriated glower as when he began. I could tell by the set of his face that he did not regret those words.

I hadn't realized that there were tears in my eyes and that I had stopped breathing until I blinked.

Anguish rippled through me like a tidal wave and my free hand was scrunched so tightly that I could feel my nails beginning to cut into my skin. My breaths were shaky and I tried hard not to burst into tears.

"Fine!" I spat. I didn't know how I had the strength to even open my mouth. It all just poured out of me. "I'm just so sorry that I've wasted so much of your time, Captain Hitsugaya. Maybe I'll take your advice and really go die in a ditch somewhere, what with all this crap I have to put up with. And you know what? I think I'll be happy to do so. You know why?" I paused for effect.

"Because you're no different from the rest of them!"

And with that, I stormed out and slammed the door with a mighty thwack!

Now, here I was, running away from the only place I thought was home.

I knew eventually I'd have to return, or else I'll get into trouble for staying away too long. But right now I couldn't think about that. All that was on my mind was to get as far away as possible.

I kept running for a long time, my tears blinding me, until with a yelp I tripped over a tree root and fell. My face was immersed in cold dirt, and I picked myself up and wiped my face as clean as I could manage. Ignoring the stinging in my hands and knees, I dusted myself off and went over to a nearby tree. I didn't have the will to run any further. With a heavy gulp, I sank down along the trunk, cradling my legs against me and rocking back and forth. Even now his words continued to ring through my head.

_This is a _complete _waste of my time! In fact, __you are a complete waste of my time, Aria Miyamoto!_

_You're not getting any further and I feel downright idiotic for not having seen that in the first place!_

_Why should I help a girl who can't even get a grip on her own damned __sword?! You are an _utter_ waste of time and space, Miyamoto!_

_YOU CAN GO ROT ALONE IN A DITCH FOR ALL I CARE!_

My shoulders were wracked with tremors as I tried to push these thoughts out of my head. But, no matter how hard I tried, those venomous sentences continued to come back and haunt me.

My vision grew blurry and I angrily wiped tears away. I detested crying; it was a show of weakness, a display of emotion that I did not deserve to have.

But it was just so hard to keep from breaking down right then and there.

My sways grew faster as I tried to swallow the lump that had formed in my throat. Eventually it began to sink, all the way down to my chest, where my heart was. Whether it was that or the cold that made me shiver I didn't know, but I tightened my embrace around myself in an effort to drive away the chill that had enveloped me.

It had only been a few days since I had finally hardened my resolve—and, in a single moment, just one person was able to shatter it so easily. How was that possible? Maybe I wasn't as strong as I had took myself as; maybe I should have set my sights just a little bit lower.

An involuntary sob escaped my mouth and I bit down hard, trying to stop. I shut my eyes tightly and focused on evening my breathing. In the back of my head, I could feel Kurobararyu trying to find a way to soothe me, but I forcefully pushed her away, not in the mood.

"S-S-Stupid Captain Hitsugaya," I hiccupped. "He's such a j-j-jerk…" Well, that was the understatement of the decade…

The cold breeze shook me once more. I could feel it in the air; it was the middle of autumn, but already it was getting ready for the transition into the frigid winter. I shivered and bundled myself tighter. _I should have brought a jacket…_

It was much darker than I had thought. The sky was set in a new moon, giving the forest an even eerier appearance. Despite the fact that I was surrounded by trees, I couldn't help but shudder in slight fear. What if someone found me here…?

Nearby, a rustle sounded. Quickly I leaped up and stepped back hesitantly. Could it really be someone here to hurt me? Even though knowing I probably wouldn't stand a chance in my current state, I gripped my zanpakutō defensively.

Along with rustles I began to hear footsteps and instinctively I shifted into a fighting stance. While there was no guarantee that this person knew I was here, I couldn't be too sure. It was the way I had taught myself to survive.

The footfalls grew louder and the thought of hiding behind a rock swiftly ran through my head. I shook it off, knowing that hiding would do me no good. I concentrated straight ahead of me, tensing for a fight.

When the sounds were finally close enough I suddenly felt a brief spurt of strong reiatsu. Abruptly panicked, I clumsily extracted Kuro from her sheathe and randomly swung her in front of me, looking away.

"Leave me alone!"

I felt something come in contact with my sword along with some soft grunts. There seemed to be some motion to stop my blade and I thrashed about faster.

"I said get awa—"

"Aria…?"

That familiar voice made me suddenly stop my arbitrary flails. Arm still raised, I peeled my eyelids open just a smidgen and peeked.

Standing in front of me, trying to push my sword away from him without getting cut all the while staring at me, was Ikotsu Hayashi.

***

"I see…" Hayashi-san muttered.

We were deeper inside the forest, but I didn't feel unsafe because he had led me down here. We were within a sort of meadow type area, surrounding by a large amount of boulders and rocks which faced a low cliff. I myself was perched on one of these rocks, scrunching up my body so that I could barely see over my knees. Hayashi-san was seated next to me, staring into the dark forest. I had hesitantly told him about the past events, including Loly's attack, as well as what had happened to me with Captain Hitsugaya. Again, I had to swallow the swollen lump in my throat. I wasn't angry, but the recollection was making me very discouraged. I didn't know what I would do if he really did think I was a hopeless case…

"I don't think he's right," the man next to me said out loud. I glanced up at him uncertainly.

"What right does he have to judge you? Who says that he gets to say what you can or can't do?" He asked. I shrugged.

"He's my captain… I have to take his word for a bunch of things…"

"But everything? I doubt it. Just because he's your captain doesn't mean he gets to control every single little detail of your life."

"But… He's a captain…"

"They don't know everything. And your captain is still pretty young; I can name at least five that have more experience than him."

I swallowed once more. I carefully processed his words, contemplating them.

"But…"

"But what? You know I'm right—he doesn't have the right to control you. If you want to get stronger, so be it. Get stronger. If he said all those things, then maybe that's just a sign that you two aren't meant to get along. What kind of person tells another that they're a complete waste of time and space? I think that's a bit harsh, considering the fact that you've been trying so hard. You're doing your best, but he's only shooting you down…"

This time I made no verbal response. I was beginning to quake again, but not from anguish. This time the flame of rage sparked within my heart.

How could he say those things to me? Here I was trying my hardest to control myself, but then he goes and lays waste to whatever I'm doing…

"If he was going to help you genuinely, why would he be saying stuff like that? Unless he really wasn't trying to help you at all… Maybe he's… I don't know… Using you or something like that."

The word using set me a bit over the edge. I shuffled off my rock and grabbed Kurobararyu. I unsheathed her in my anger and eyed the nearby rocks dangerously.

"He might not like you that much after all… When he's gotten what he wants from you he'll probably just toss you aside and ignore you…"

My vision flickered red and, despite me using my less dominant hand, I very much wanted to break something.

"Flare your bloodthirsty thorns, Kurobararyu!" I uttered, enraged. I felt my reiatsu spike, but this time I didn't care if anyone felt it. Grasping her tightly, I raised the speared weapon and drove it straight into a rock. She stayed there, lodged, and I nearly had a fit trying to pull her out. When she wouldn't, I went crazy.

_"Kisoku Bara__!" _I hissed. Purple fire streamed from the hole that Kuro was in, and in seconds the boulder exploded, spraying me with gravel. I twitched petulantly as the shards hit my face.

I screamed, all that pent up frustration gushing out of me. I picked up Kuro, laying on the ground, and flung her straight at another rock. She was driven a third of the way in and— completely lost in my anger—I blew up the hard material once more. But still… It wasn't enough.

I could feel Hayashi-san's gaze at the back of my head, but I didn't sense any motion from him to stop me. I was grateful for that much. But the urge to destroy everything around me still hadn't gone away.

_"Youkou Oshaku__!" _

Kurobararyu suddenly flared, engulfed in purple flames. Without a second thought, I slashed at a rock and effectively split it in two. I smashed and clubbed the two halves until they were barely more than smoking gravel.

It went on like this for quite a while. The moment I saw another rock to smash, I smashed it. The blazing scepter made it much easier to obliterate the rough stones, and for a long time, that was all I was doing. Right now, I wanted nothing more than to rip off the cast that bound my left arm so I could totally let loose—to shriek at every little thing that I saw. It was the only way I could relieve my stress.

At last, all the rocks had been demolished, lying in charred, smoking piles of ashy gravel. The Youkou Oshaku still blazed brightly in my hand, which was aching from all the work I made it do. My breath was heaving, but my temper seemed to have been put off… For now.

Shaking from my tantrum, I put my zanpakutō back into her sealed state; I stabbed her into the ground and collapsed, breathing heavily. I drew my knees up again, a familiar position.

_Aria… _Kuro whispered, concerned. Despite the fact that my fury had receded, the pain was still there.

_I still can't believe… That he said those things… __I thought, not really to anyone in particular. How could he…?_

I bit my lip, staring blankly in front of me. There was smoke everywhere, shards littering the ground like sand. I was suddenly afraid of what would happen if I were surrounded people and not lifeless rocks. My mind was finally coming to its senses.

_Oh my soul… What…? How could I…? I thought…_

Realizing what I had just done, I started to panic. Was this how I dealt with stress?! I felt so lucky that there was no one around, or else they'd probably get caught in the crossfire…

_Oh no… I… I really am a hopeless case…_

_No, Aria… You're not… You just needed to blow some steam…_

_By obliterating a dozen boulders?! What if those were people?!_

_But they weren't…_

_But what will happen next time? What if I totally lose it in a crowd? I can't… I'm…_

_T_he taste of iron entered my mouth, and I noticed that I had bit my lip too hard. Tears sprang up in my eyes once more and this time I had an especially tough time suppressing them.

"…You must've been really mad."

I jumped, wheeling. It was only then that I had recalled that Hayashi-san was with me. Oh no, what would he think when he saw…?

He approached me, still gnawing on my lip. He eyed the gravel piles critically, as if assessing them. He looked down on me, one arm wrapped around my torso.

"Don't worry, I don't blame you," he announced gently. I withdrew my teeth only to press my lips tightly together. He could be lying…

"No, I'm telling the truth. If it were me, I'd be slashing rocks and trees as well. It's a lot of work, being a Soul Reaper…"

I looked down, silently agreeing with him. I reached up and stared at my hand.

Could I ever do anything right?

"It's a tough world out there…" Hayashi-san remarked, sitting next to me. Instinctively, I shied away, and he chuckled.

"Don't worry, I won't hurt you… That's a pretty rational response. Plenty of people like to destroy things when they're stressed out."

"Yes, but boulders…?" I muttered.

He shrugged. "If there are any around."

"Of course…"

My hand rested in my lap as I stared at my knees. What could I do now? I felt so lost; I didn't know what to do anymore. I was really starting to hate my broken left arm. Why couldn't it just heal already so that I can finally be of some use again?! It felt as though I had the whole world on my shoulders, and I was walking through a tar pit. For a moment I lost sight of my vision. I could only stare at my feet the way they were, stuck behind an impossible impediment.

"You need to tighten your grip."

My head shot up, staring at the man next to me. He was looking down, randomly drawing in the dirt.

"P-Pardon?"

"You need to tighten your grip on your sword. Loosen your wrist though; it needs to stay flexible."

I stared at him for what seemed like a long time. His shoulders went up and down again.

"You seem to be in a bind… I don't see anything wrong with helping you. I know how to hold a sword too, you know."

I processed his words, and something occurred to me.

"Hayashi-san?"

"Yes?"

"How do you know what it's like being Soul Reaper…?"

At least, that was the feeling I had when he said it: that he had previously been a Soul Reaper as opposed to just watching them. To be honest, I never really knew much about him. He had saved me one time and I had simply gone along with it. He never dressed in Soul Reaper garbs, opting only to wear simple a yukata, or something similar. I had never really asked about him until now because there was just so much on my mind.

He didn't seem surprised at my question and simply shrugged. "I graduated from the Soul Reaper Academy some time ago. Unfortunately I wasn't able to stay in the Gotei 13 for very long; I suppose it just wasn't for me."

"So… You left?"

"Yes, I wasn't part of the Gotei 13 any longer. I guess, in a way, I resigned." He chuckled, as though laughing at his little inside joke.

"Hmm… Resigned, huh…?" My finger absently tapped my knee as I stared ahead.

"I wouldn't suggest doing it," he continued to snicker. "It's not a very… Interesting thing to go through with. Give yourself a chance and stay for a bit—it's better that way."

"…Hmm…"

"Don't worry about it; if you have any issues you can just come to me for help. That's what I'm here for." He patted my back rather robotically, and it wasn't extremely reassuring, but it was still better than nothing.

At least there's someone around here that doesn't think I'm hopeless.

I sighed again and rose, dislodging my sword from the ground. I dusted her off, silently apologizing about my mistreatment of her. Hayashi-san also stood, focusing on my hand.

"There," he pointed. "You need to fix that."

"Th-This?"

"Yes. See? Like this."

He reached out and fixed my hand as I ogled him, a bit bewildered.

"Now try swinging it."

I swung it just as he asked… And I had admit, it did feel smoother than it normally did.

"Good. Now try moving your hand a bit…Yeah, right there. Bend your elbow a bit more… Okay, you're good…"

It went on like that for the rest of the night. Under Hayashi-san's watchful tutelage, I felt more confident about my right hand's swordsmanship. I was warming up to him, since he was a lot less stern than Captain Hitsugaya was. There was no annoyance in his voice, no underlying impatience, no exasperation. During that time, I began to gradually forget about the things he had said to me as I focused more on improving my skills.

The sky was extremely dark when we finally stopped. It was probably the blackest I'd ever seen here. The clouds were a monochrome gray, and—despite the lack of a moon—I was unwillingly reminded of my inner world.

_No color… No light…_

I exhaled as I sheathed Kurobararyu.

"I have to go now…" I muttered sleepily. "I don't want to have to face _him _when I get back… So I'm going to sleep…"

"Alright then," he replied. "We should meet each other again sometime soon. Good job tonight."

"Yeah… Thanks…"

"Hey, don't worry about your captain. I'm sure he'll… come around soon. And anyway, who needs them, right?"

"… I guess so… Anyway, good night, Hayashi-san."

"'Night."

I waved unenthusiastically as I ran off, trying to not to think about what I'd have to face once I got back. And through it all, I tried to convince myself that I was seeking acceptance in general, and that a certain person's approval didn't really matter.

But no matter how hard I tried, I just couldn't keep the thought from coming back to haunt me: the thought that if Captain Hitsugaya didn't care, then none of it really mattered after all.

And now I've learned that when you're around for a reason, that reason better exist. Because once it's gone, so are you.

***

I swallowed compulsively as I stood outside the door of my shared room with Captain Hitsugaya. The reconstruction of my room was finally beginning to speed up and there were good prospects of it finishing within the next few weeks or so. I never thought I'd actually be glad to stop sharing a room with him.

With a glum sigh, I pushed open the door and sauntered in. His reiatsu was nowhere near this area; he was probably still in the office, finishing up today's work. It reminded me of this morning, when everything was still calm and peaceful. I was simply working on my share of paperwork while he worked on his, with the occasional session of small talk. Who would have thought that in just a few hours everything could change so drastically? That, in a single moment, everything could twist up so much that you couldn't even recognize any of it anymore?

Everything was just beyond my control; it was hard to catch up. More than anything, I'd like to have some power over my life—a say in whether or not this can happen, or if that shouldn't happen. Lack of control terrified me; it was like I was falling through an abyss with absolutely nothing to hold on to, and I could only wait for the moment of impact to finally come.

I needed something to grasp: something tangible that I could hold on to for dear life; something that can remind me that I really was in control, instead of it all just being an illusion. I was so desperate, that I would reach out for just about anything.

I just didn't want to plummet again.

I washed up and changed into my sleepwear, my mind drifting. I guess you could say I was sad… But it felt more like that feeling you get right after you cry for a very long time, that period of silence in which you really didn't know what to do next. I realized that I was staring at my captain's futon on the floor and I shook my head, trying to clear it.

I flipped onto the bed, simply laying there for a few instants. I idled, wondering if the ceiling could really bend if I stared at it long enough. Now that I was alone again, the urge to cry had again emerged, more tempting than ever. I struggled to fight it off, telling myself over and over that crying would do me no good.

Oh, but imagine how much lighter I'd feel if I did cry, just for a few minutes…

No. I'd been evading real tears for so long now, and old habits die hard. Repressing the large lump in my throat with strained skill, I shirked under the covers. I covered my face, hoping the dark would help clear my thoughts.

I lay there for several minutes before I felt a flicker of reiatsu and my mind came alive, panicked.

_Oh, what should I do, what should I do? What if he gets so mad at the sight of me that he'll just start yelling again? What if he freezes the room or something? What if he tries to talk to me?_

Then again, what if he didn't?

I spun to my side so that I was staring at the wall. Could I pull off being asleep? Acting never came naturally to me, and the idea of staying calm seemed impossible. I fought to still my body, evening my breaths as if I was deeply asleep. Scooting closer to the wall, I lightly rested my forehead against it, trying to see if the coolness would soothe me.

After a while, it worked. My shoulders were rising at a steady pace and my fidgeting had finally stopped. Only now did I realize that I was emotionally and physically exhausted, and I used that to my advantage. I closed my eyes, attempting to will sleep into my eyes. However, part of me wanted to stay awake, just to hear Captain Hitsugaya's reaction… And the other part was completely and utterly terrified of it.

After a bit of tense waiting, I finally heard the door quietly slide open and someone's feet softly treading across the floor. For a moment they paused, as if in surprise. I wasn't sure since my face was still turned toward the wall and I had completely covered the back side of my head, acting as if the blanket could serve as a real barrier between me and him. Again, I focused on my breathing: in and out… In and out…

For several seconds, there was silence. And then, seemingly out of nowhere, he moved again and surprised me by sitting on the edge of the bed. I resisted the urge to cringe, but I couldn't stop the small twitch that ran through me. Knowing him, he probably noticed it, but if he had, he was ignoring it, seeing as he wasn't moving.

My body was curled up quite closely, but I wanted to coil myself even more. His icy gaze was almost palpable, and it felt almost as though my back was burning. Not for the first time, I wanted to disappear, so that I couldn't feel that look. But it was the first time I had ever felt like that around him.

I waited in tense silence at what he would do next.

_

* * *

_

It wasn't often when Tōshirō Hitsugaya would get genuinely agitated at something—even less when he got angry.

After Aria had stormed out, the boy swore an oath under his breath before returning to his seat. His fist was clenched so tightly that it felt like it would bleed from his nails, and with great strain he unwound his fingers, instead opting to dig them into the wooden desk. His turquoise eyes seemed to want to burn a huge hole into the wall. If there had been anyone that came in contact with him, they would surely be frozen by that murderous glare.

_Miyamoto…_

He was still too furious to speak, his lips a tightly pressed line. The girl's image resurfaced and a surge of rage rippled through him. Why did she have to be so obstinate? Why couldn't she just go through with what he wanted, just for once?

_But isn't that what's she been doing this whole time?_ A small voice in the back of his head murmured. Gruffly he pushed it away, too stubborn to shift from his own notions.

Tōshirō closed his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose. It was that time of year when the Gotei 13 was the busiest, and the extra load of work had never thrilled him. Occasionally Rangiku would come and help, but not as often as he would like. And then there was Aria's training that was on his mind as well. Despite being considered a child prodigy, even the famed Tōshirō Hitsugaya had a hard time juggling all this on his schedule.

He shook his head at the thought of the girl. He would never calm down if she kept popping up. Leaning back in his chair, he breathed in deeply in an effort to relax. Again, he thought of why she had to be so unreasonable.

_Master, _a quiet voice called from his mind. He sighed.

_What is it now, Hyōrinmaru?_

_Master, I don't think it's… _correct _for you think Aria Miyamoto is being unreasonable._

In this mood, Tōshirō didn't like it when others pointed out when he was wrong—not even when it was his own zanpakutō.

_How can you say that? She wouldn't obey my orders even though she __knows it's what's best for her. She refuses my help and thinks she can just use me when she wants and then discard me afterward!_

_Is that really what she is, Master?_

_Of course it is,_ he snapped, getting impatient. Why did his sword have to be difficult as well?

_Are you sure? Think back, Tōshirō Hitsugaya, and try to remember any other time she'd supposedly "discarded" you like you claim._

Too aggravated to protest, Tōshirō did as Hyōrinmaru asked, going through the memories of his third seat. He soon found out that, no matter how he looked at it, he couldn't find any evidence to back his claim of her discarding him. If anything, she seemed overly grateful about the whole thing and appeared to exceedingly welcome his help.

These thoughts gradually sank in, and all of a sudden Tōshirō's anger subsided, only replaced by bewilderment.

_Master, please forgive me for saying this but… I think _you_ are the one being difficult, not her._

He could say nothing. How could he, in the face of his mistake?

_She only wanted some privacy,_ the zanpakutō continued. _Everyone has that right…_

A held breath escaped the young captain's lips and he rubbed his temple.

_Every time I leave her alone she gets in trouble…_

_But what about now? The girl isn't an idiot; I can see she's trying to learn from her mistakes, after what you said to her. She'll probably be very careful this time, so not to worry you. Plus, she's smart enough to stay within the walls of the Seireitei, and if there was any trouble a Soul Reaper would be alerted immediately._

Tōshirō leaned onto the desk with both elbows, seeing the gravity of his error. His hands rubbed his scalp._ Shoot,_ he thought._ I take back what I said._

_What you said about what?_

_What I said about her discarding me of course. What else is there?_

_Are you sure those are the only words you wish to retract…?_

Hyōrinmaru's tone gave Tōshirō a rather bad feeling and he pestered the former about it.

_What is it now…?_

_Don't you remember anything you said to her before she left?_

The captain ran back over his conversation with his third seat, and he didn't immediately see anything wrong.

_What did I say? I only called her—_

He stopped there.

It finally hit him. Like a slap in the face.

His mouth fell open slightly as he recalled the words he had so harshly thrown at the innocent girl. He was speechless, wholly engulfed by his revelation.

_Your claim that she uses you is not the speech you should take back, Master._

At that moment, guilt completely overrode the boy's thoughts. He could clearly see the image of Aria's face when he had finished his tirade, as if it was burned into his mind. There was anger and indignity, of course, but he could see the underlying emotions written clear in her eyes. If he hadn't known her for as long as he had, he might not have seen it. There was pain in those pale features, the suffering that came with basically being called completely useless. He felt even more remorse when he remembered how when he finished he didn't feel a shred of regret for his words. Actually, he had felt a bit… Triumphant.

Tōshirō was beginning to feel sick to his stomach. He could finally see the heartless cruelty in his words. Sure, Aria hadn't been so successful in her training in the last few days, but what could he expect from a girl whose dominant hand was completely broken and she had no idea how to hold a sword in the other? She wasn't a prodigy, not like him. If anything, he _admired_ her for her sheer persistence and effort.

But his words…

_You are the only thing she has,_ Hyōrinmaru said softly._ For her, being called a waste of time and space by you is the equivalent of her losing her purpose in life._

He didn't need to be told the obvious. He knew how much Aria depended on him—how much she really needed him. He swore a violent oath under his breath, cursing himself at his callousness.

"Shoot… I've really screwed up…"

But what could he do? Right now, Tōshirō couldn't feel a trace of Aria's reiatsu, and that worried him instantly. Was she hurt? Was she lost? Had she fallen? He cursed again and again, wanting to hit himself. He remembered Aria's last words before she thundered out.

_"Fine. I'm just __so sorry that I've wasted so much of your time,__ Captain Hitsugaya. MaybeI'll take your advice and really go die in a ditch somewhere, what with all this crap I have to put up with. And you know what? I think I'll be __happy to do so. You know why?"_

What she said afterward rang through him, as if reminding him over and over. He knew now that what she said was true. He was no different than those monsters that she had encountered in the past.

He was only frustrated… He hadn't meant to hurt her…

But he couldn't dwell on it now. He had to wait for her to come back, since he had no way of tracking her down. And he felt too ashamed to conjure the motivation anyway—he just couldn't face her. How could a person apologize after saying such cutting words like those? He was never good with apologies in the first place; the last real one he made was years ago, to his lieutenant. Ever since then, he'd been careful not to screw up anymore so that he wouldn't have to apologize for it.

He leaned back into his seat, staring up at the ceiling and waiting, wondering if there was any way Aria could forgive him.

_***_

Tōshirō felt it immediately. It was as if a siren had begun ringing loudly in his ears.

Aria's reiatsu. It was finally close again after who-knows-how-many hours.

He abruptly rose from his seat, about to approach. But indecision nagged at him, and he sat back down again. Only to think of going out again and then to stay.

_Make up your mind! _He shouted at himself.

In the end, he decided to wait for a few minutes before he'd go and talk to her. To be honest, the actual thought seemed nerve-wracking. What would he say? How would he say it? She probably hated him by now, for all he knew.

The time went by fast, and Tōshirō wondered if the clock was cheating him as he realized that, in what seemed like a few seconds, his "few minutes" had gone by. Hopefully Aria had calmed down enough to listen to what he had to say and she wouldn't go berserk on him…

_How ironic… I'm scared of _her_ going berserk on _me_. _

Knowing he'd have to face her sooner or later, he got up for what he hoped was the last time. The moment he left his seat, the urge to return was incredibly tantalizing. He grit his teeth together, determined to go through with it. Who was he, Captain Tōshirō Hitsugaya, to be scared of one of his subordinates?

"I'm not scared," he whispered fiercely to himself. That much was true; he wasn't scared of Aria herself.

No, what he was more afraid of was her rejection.

He pondered about what he would say as he strode slowly through the halls. He seemed to subconsciously move slower, as if he was really unwilling to follow through. Tōshirō didn't notice, too preoccupied with his thoughts. He huffed a sigh as he came up blank. After all, he couldn't just go up to her say and say, "I'm sorry," and then be done with it.

When he at last reached the door to his room, he paused tentatively before entering. He listened through the doors, trying to detect any hint of movement. There was only silence on the other side, and he wondered if Aria was asleep. Part of him wished she was.

Trying to calm himself he pushed the door open quietly, just in case she really was sleeping. He took in the room and it looked… Still, for lack of a better word. There was nothing disturbed as far as he could tell; the desk still had some scattered objects across its surface and the little personal aesthetics he added to his room remained unchanged.

Feeling a bit reassured, he quietly stepped into the room, closing the door behind him. The light from the hall ceased, plunging the room into obscurity. He stalled, waiting for his eyes to adjust, before reluctantly turning his head toward his third seat.

On the outside, she looked normal. Not that he could see much anyway. Her entire body was covered by the thick quilt on the bed, though he could see she was curled up on her side. She was positioned on the farthest side of the bed there was, so close she was touching the wall.

In that instant, he knew she was awake. Her reiatsu was not that subdued aura it usually was when she was asleep. Her breathing was far too even, too calm for someone who'd just been emotionally beaten. Tōshirō knew her well enough that, even if she was slumbering, her breathing would not come close to this.

Upon closer inspection, he could tell she was incredibly tense, as if her body had turned to stone. She was facing the wall, her forehead pressed against it. Her face itself seemed unscathed, but he noted the slightly scrunched up quality it had. He knew that look quite well.

His heart beating low in his chest, Tōshirō walked toward her, sitting down on the edge of the bed with as much delicacy as he could manage. He peered over her, staring at her face for some time. She wasn't completely enveloped; the blanket over her face probably felt stifling. He noticed the way she minutely twitched when he sat down.

Despite preparing himself for this, Tōshirō didn't say anything. He couldn't even open his mouth, let alone speak. Even when staring at the blatant sorrow on her face that had reemerged after several months, he couldn't bring himself to apologize. This itself made him disgusted at himself. How was it possible that he was too weak to even manage a simple admission of guilt?

His hand suddenly moved on its own, reaching out to Aria. Realizing what he was going to do, Tōshirō jerked his wrist back. Another bout of indecision came upon him and he hesitated, thinking about trying to touch her again. But for some reason… He just couldn't do it; the shame was too much.

He stared at her for a very long time afterward. And then, suddenly, something caused him to rapidly get up and turn away, making him bolt for the bathroom. He quickly changed in silent, wanting to get to sleep as soon as possible. He came back and swiftly hid under the covers, pushing them over his head as if defending himself against an unseen force. There was a heavy weight on his chest as he closed his eyes.

Tōshirō uneasily consoled himself to sleep, trying very hard not to think about that large, shining, diamond tear that had rolled down Aria's face that had finally pushed him over the edge.

* * *

_In this dream, everything was different. It wasn't the usual nightmare that I had about my past. No, there was just a way I could tell it wasn't the same. There wasn't that same heaviness and despair that was there every time it started. Regardless, it was still dark, and instinctively I tried to find a way out._

_Through my searching, however, I felt something shift. Suddenly, I saw a figure bloom in front of me, and I was surprised to see Rangiku-san standing in front of me, her back turned._

_"Rangiku-san!" I cried out happily. I felt blissful at seeing her; she was like a surrogate mother to me. Who wouldn't be happy to see their mother?_

_I stretched my hand, wanting to touch her. Her ginger head turned for a fraction right before I came in contact with her._

_But something went wrong. The moment I touched her, the area of her that I brushed began to dissolve, and soon her entire body was vanishing._

_"No!" I tried to grab her, to hold onto her, but that only seemed to make her disperse faster. I stole one more glance at her face before she completely disappeared and was shocked at her expression._

_Her eyes were empty, as though she was staring right through me. As if she didn't recognize me at all._

_I blinked as she completely faded away. I shook myself and continued my search, wondering if I could find my answers somewhere else._

_It happened again. This time, it was Sawahata-kun that appeared before me. He was turned to the side this time, but I still couldn't see his face. Excited to see my friend, I ran over to touch him. Quickly, I was dismayed to find it had the same effect as Rangiku-san._

_As Sawahata-kun's head melted away, I was again shocked at his face. His electric blue eyes were abnormally vacant, even as he looked right at me. It was as though he didn't even know who I was._

_I went on, and met up with Kozue. The exact same thing happened; the same disappearance and the same impassive glance._

_By now, I was very distressed. Why was this happening? Why were the people I held most precious disappearing from me?_

_Frantic, I started running again, trying to find a way out. There had to be some answers… There had to be…!_

_What seemed like an eternity passed, and finally I spotted something else. It formed slower than the others, like dripping honey. At last I could make a familiar profile. This person was sporting a white haori, with a long sword tied to his back and had a spiky white head._

_I was suddenly exhilarant. It was Captain—my captain! He had the answers to this whole thing; he had to! I just knew it!_

_I approached him, though slower than before, wondering if he'd vanish too. I didn't want that to happen; the last thing I wanted was for him, of all people, to fade away as well._

_Much to my delight, he turned around before I could reach out to him, and I was very eager to see his face. Before I could completely see it, however, I extended a hand, too enthusiastic to hold back any longer._

_But then I saw his eyes, and I wanted to stop._

_What was wrong here? His eyes, his normally sharp, aqua eyes, were not blank, like the rest, but there was something there that I just didn't like. The way he looked at me… It was as though he recognized me and knew who I was, but it looked as though he just didn't care._

_"Captain!"_

_Nonetheless I finally reached him, and was suddenly very glad that I could actually touch him. I looked up at him and smiled widely._

_"I'm so glad to see you, Captain! It was getting really weird here!"_

_But it was the same. He still stared at me with those piercing, dispassionate eyes. I frowned._

_"… Is… Is something wrong…? Why are you looking at me like that…?"_

_He looked away, something I felt was very, very wrong. Why wouldn't he look at me? Why couldn't he see me?_

_Captain's own tanned hand came up and wrapped around my own, and I was startled at how extremely cold he felt, as if he really was carved from pure ice._

_This wasn't Captain Hitsugaya…_

_Was it…?_

_He pulled my hand away from him, throwing it away as if it were a piece of trash. I blinked in shock at him. What was going on here?_

_"What are y—"_

_As I tried to speak, however, I suddenly felt something on the hand he touched. Looking down, I gasped in horror as I saw __I was the one beginning to fade away, instead of the other way around._

_I looked up, aghast, and tried to ask him what was going on—but my voice caught in my throat. Something—I don't know what—had changed in his look. I didn't know if it was better or worse than the last one; all I knew was that I __did not like it._

_And then, all of a sudden, the previous people from my dream appeared, standing in a silent circle around me. They were all turned away from me, and I felt something very heavy in my chest._

_"Rangiku-san!" I hollered. I could feel my arms beginning to disperse and I tried to stop it. "Rangiku-san! It's me! Aria! Help!"_

_But she couldn't hear me. It was as if I didn't exist. Her image changed before my very eyes, and I could see she was talking animatedly to some unseen figure. She had a smile on her face, completely oblivious to my shouts._

_It was like she was going on with her life perfectly happy without me._

_Knowing my shouts were futile, I turned and started to yell at Sawahata-kun and Kozue, but they too seemed to be preoccupied with something else. They all looked so happy, as if my disappearing made no impression on them. I struggled frantically, wanting to join them—to be a part of their lives, to prove I have a place here, that I exist._

_But it was no use. By now, even my legs were scattering into a billion tiny particles. Horror-struck, I turned back to the one last person there. Captain Hitsugaya._

_I hadn't realized I was shaking up until now. The process had sped up, and my neck was disbanding as well. I stared at him in confusion._

_He was turned away from me as well, but not completely. His head was turned to the side, so I could still see the two eyes that had that same disturbing appearance. And finally, I could name it._

_It was joy. He was…_happy_ that I was disappearing._

_As my vision began to fade to black, he said one last thing to me, his tone callous and cold._

_"I don't need you anymore."_

_If I was awake, I had no doubt I would be screaming._

**

* * *

***I wonder how many of you are staring at the screen with your mouths hanging wide open. I know I was when I first wrote this.**

**Now, before you click the review button and start yelling at me about Tōshirō's little rant there, I just want you to tell you something. ****To be honest, I'm not very mad at ****Tōshirō. I can't blame him because there have been times when _I _myself have wanted to yell at the nearest person to me. I'm sure that all of you have felt that urge too. Now, I'm not sure if I phrased what he said quite right; I'm still wondering if the way he said it is a bit OOC. If you want me to tweak it, just say so in a review. (And no, that doesn't mean I'll take it out. When I mean tweak, I mean tweak.)  
**

**Also a confession: I'm more mad at Aria than I am at ****Tōshirō. Mostly for overreacting over this whole thing, because she should know better than to think ****Tōshirō would ever mean her any harm, and for something else that I'll let you ponder on your own. But actually, I can't stay mad at her for very long. There's actually someone _else _that I'm fuming at, but I can't say. You can figure that out by yourself too. **

**Now, for those of you that are pulling your hair out and screaming at the screen how this could have happened between those two, I just want to point out something. One of the reasons I typed this chapter was because I wanted to show that ****Tōshirō and Aria's relationship is _NOT _perfect. If you think about it, those two are too different to have a perfectly stable relationship forever. The biggest issue here is Aria's insecurity about her own abilities. Aria is most certainly _not _a prodigy like ****Tōshirō; she had to work very hard to get where she is today, whereas the latter possesses natural talent. This is what causes most of Aria's tension. She's afraid that ****Tōshirō will eventually think that a guy like him shouldn't be "wasting his time" with a girl like her, and it really bugs her. Although, if you think about it, this new dream is a significant change in Aria: her mind is slowly being shifted from her past to her present, but I can't say it's the kind of change I want to see in her. There are also some other differences, but that was the most important one. **

**Even with that said, I'm still expecting some reviews that will be rather... emotional. *quickly dives behind five inch titanium wall with bulletproof helmet* Okay, I'm ready. Leave a review please!  
**


	27. Anemone

*****This... took a lot longer than I had expected to post... A_ lot _longer. Sorry... My beta had some more technical issues and I had no idea it was okay with her to post this before she went over it completely until about an hour ago. I've had this finished for quite some time... Gah, I'm so sorry, guys... *hangs head in shame* **

**So because she couldn't look over the whole thing, do you think you could look over this instead? Try extra hard, please, because I want to make sure this is good... I went over it three times myself, but there's only so much the actual writer can do...**

**I'm bringing in a sort of a new kind of... _concept_, if that's what you can call it, into this chapter. After the last few _Bleach _chapters (particularly the ones with our favorite white-haired captain in it, I'm still freaking out over everything), a strange idea came to me, and I found it _perfect... _Not too much to go on here, but maybe you'll figure it out once you read. An odd idea, to be honest. But I really needed something like that, and I was happy it popped up in the canon... If not a bit ashamed.  
**

**Okay. 'Nough chit-chat. Read on!  
**

* * *

Rangiku just couldn't place it. She just couldn't put a name to it, no matter how hard she thought. And for the chattering gossip she was, it was _killing_ her!

She checked her secret stash in the office. No, all her sake bottles were still there, nothing tampered with. Then she checked her stash in the bathroom. And when that wasn't it, she even went so far as to look at her stockpile under the floorboards. But still, there seemed to be nothing wrong.

The strawberry blond straightened, scratching her head.

"Something's just not right here," she said to herself. "But what…?"

Shrugging she went over and retrieved a bottle of fresh sake. She unscrewed the cap and was about to press the spout to her lips when something occurred to her.

"…Captain?"

It was much too quiet. It was so…eerie.

Rangiku glanced around, her lips pursed. Her captain was nowhere in sight. There wasn't any paper on the desk, no icy glare and definitely no aggravated shouts. This alone wasn't enough to scare her; she had been in here by herself plenty of times. It was just the taste of the atmosphere…

"This is…kinda creepy…" Rangiku shivered dramatically. She couldn't remember a time when her captain was not around to yell at her at some point in the day. She looked at the alcohol in her hand and with a sigh replaced it.

_It's just not worth drinking if Captain isn't around to yell at me for it…_

Rangiku placed her hands on her hips, pondering. Maybe that was what felt so odd about the squad these days. It was much too quiet lately; there didn't seem to be a trace of excitement or liveliness in the air. She pouted, crossing her arms.

"This is no fun," she said out loud. "Where's the captain? It's too quiet!! Hello? Hello there? Anyone?"

She called out into the air for several seconds before realizing that she was yelling at no one. Pursing her mouth she stared at the shelf full of books.

"GAAAH!" she hollered. "I NEED SOME EXCITEMENT!! SOMEONE PLEASE, DO SOMETHING!"

As if on cue, the door behind her opened.

Rangiku jumped, not really expecting an answer. She swiveled her head to come face to face with Captain Hitsugaya.

"C-Captain!" she called.

"Care to tell me what all the ruckus is about?" he asked in a low tone.

Immediately she sensed something was wrong. His tone was too quiet, too soft for her respected, icy captain. The assertiveness that was usually there had completely vanished, only to be replaced by an uncharacteristic meekness.

"…Captain…?"

He scowled. "What?"

The lieutenant stared long and hard at the boy as he gently treaded over to his desk. Shuffling around, he extracted a stack of paperwork and tossed it onto the desk. She watched as he rummaged through his desk, searching for something. He twitched as he slammed the drawers shut, evidently frustrated.

"Damn it," he growled. He got out of his chair and continued to sift through his desk. "Where the hell is that inkpad? I know I put it around here somewhere!"

Rangiku blinked. Her eyes went to his desk, where the dry, clean inkpad sat patiently with the brush on top. She looked back at Tōshirō, still oblivious.

"Dammit, dammit, dammit…"

"Uh, Captain…"

"And now I can't find my brush either… What is wrong with this thing?! Why can't it just stay in one place?!"

"Captain…"

"All I want is to find something to write with and they just disappear on me… Why do they have to be so…difficult?!"

"Er… Captain Hitsugaya…?"

_"What?!"_

He barked at her, glaring at his lieutenant. Rangiku just ogled at him.

Who was this flustered, careless boy that had replaced the cold, commanding superior that she had just seen yesterday? One part of her was incredibly amused, but mostly she was beginning to worry.

"Matsumoto!" he snapped.

"Sir," she replied mildly. She pointed at his desk, where his inkpad and brush lay. "They're right there… Your brush and your inkpad… On…the desk…?"

Tōshirō glanced angrily at the desk and in an instant his face fell, substituted by that same docile expression.

"Oh," he uttered.

"Er…Is everything alright, sir…?"

"…Everything's fine."

He plopped down into his seat and picked up his brush. Stirring the ink in the pad he dipped his brush and began to write.

"Shoot," he muttered, appearing to have made a mistake. He tried to correct it, only to make the same mistake when he rewrote it. "Darn it. What is _wrong _here…?"

Rangiku stared at him for a long time, and Tōshirō didn't seem to notice. She watched as time after time he made an error in his writing and he would go almost ballistic on it. Despite being rather lazy the lieutenant of Squad 10 was plenty observant, and she noticed how fidgety and absentminded her usually calm and attentive captain was.

She shrugged and sat down onto the couch, lazily eyeballing the ceiling.

"So…how have you been, Captain?" she inquired politely.

"Fine."

"Seen anything interesting lately?"

"No."

"Anything happen recently?"

"…No."

She noted the slight hesitation before his answer and went on. She flipped over and looked excitedly at her captain, who in turn ignored her ogling.

"Hey, I know what we can do, Captain! Let's have a drink, okay? We can invite everyone too! Kira, Hisagi, Aria, Hinamori…" she asked animatedly. "Hmm…I wonder if those two can actually drink though…" She beamed at him, waiting for his reaction.

All of a sudden Tōshirō had gotten very, very quiet. Rangiku perceived the change in atmosphere and waited.

"…I think I'll pass," was all he said before continuing his work.

If Rangiku's jaw could unhinge like a shark's, then it would have. Did she just hear right? Did Captain Hitsugaya just brush off an invitation of drinking without yelling at her?! She resisted the urge to run up to him and holler in his face, "Who are you and what have you done with my captain?!"

"You go and…have fun…or something…"

If the lieutenant was surprised then, she was now completely derailed. All the words she had been planning to say suddenly petered away, and her jaw fell slack, hanging open like a fish's.

"…What?"

All of a sudden Rangiku ran over and slipped her hand over her captain's forehead, checking for any unusual heat. He looked fine but…

"Hey!" he complained. "Get off, I'm not sick!"

"Are you sure, Captain? I mean, the first sign of being sick is denying that—"

"I told you, I'm fine! Get away!"

"Do you need anything? Water? Aspirin? Ice? Soup? A nice massage? A soft bunny to snuggle with?"

"Get away from me. Now."

"But Cap_tain_!" she whined. Tōshirō's forehead pulsed in annoyance. "You're not being yourself! I know there's something wrong! Maybe we should go see Captain Unohana—"

"For the last time, Matsumoto, I'm fine!"

He gave her a final shove before gruffly returning to his work. She stood there, blinking at him in bewilderment. Questions buzzed through her mind like a hive of angry bees.

After several minutes of being under her scrutinizing, Tōshirō finally became fed up.

"If you're not going to help me then get out," he yapped.

"What~! But Cap_tain_~!" She dragged out the last syllable, lacing it with an extra amount of whine. Nothing like a bit of spice to make life more enjoyable!

"Out. Now."

"But why~?!"

"Because you're being annoying! Now get out! _OUT_!"

And then Tōshirō threw out his lieutenant with as much dignity as a man throwing out his extremely noisy dog. As the door snapped shut behind Rangiku gave a sly smile at having successfully avoided another session of boring paperwork.

_Yes! Operation Annoy-Captain-Until-He's-Driven-Insane is a success!_

She did a little victory jig for a few moments, unaware of the bizarre looks she was receiving from passing Soul Reapers.

"Uh-huh, go Rangiku, it's your birthday, uh-huh…" she chanted.

Her delight was short lived however, as she remembered the odd way her captain had been waiting. He almost seemed to be…gloomy.

Speaking of which, she hadn't seen little Aria in a while either.

"I wonder if she's busy… I should go ask her if she wants to play with me a bit!"

She trotted off, whistling merrily.

*****

"Oh Aria~!"

The upbeat lieutenant called for the petite girl as she spotted her tiny figure sitting in a garden. She was staring at the sky, a steaming, full cup of tea in her unbroken hand.

"Hiya, Aria-chan! Watcha doin'?"

"…Huh? Oh, Rangiku-san, it's you…"

"Of course it is! Who else did you think it was?"

The girl shrugged, staring off into space. There was a pile of partially finished paperwork next to her on the floor.

_Odd… She usually does paperwork in the office… Why outside?_

"You're working?" Rangiku inquired, approaching Aria.

"Yeah." She said nothing else.

The lieutenant had a faint sense of déjà vu as she went over and sat down next to her third seat. The scent of jasmine tea wafted over the two females, adding a strange calm to the atmosphere.

_She seems…quieter than usual…_

"So!" Rangiku burst out, which caused Aria to jump. "Got any plans for today? No? Well why don't we have some fun?"

"Wh-what?" she stammered. Rangiku beamed.

"You obviously have nothing to do, so let's go out for some nice girl time, eh?"

"O-oh."

Aria seemed to almost deflate, and she shirked back into that strange, quiet aura. Her emerald eyes glanced nervously at the stack of papers beside her.

"I…I'd love to, Rangiku-san…"

"Alright!"

"…But I have to finish this."

Now it was Rangiku's turn to deflate. She put on her pouty face and whined.

"Ah, but why?"

"There's a lot of work to do…I have to get this done…"

"But we can get Captain to do it! He's not going anywhere soon!"

At the mention of their captain Aria seemed to tense. She suddenly began to exude an atmosphere of hostility and her muscles clenched. Her eyes stared straight ahead, but they burned intensely. Rangiku watched, puzzled.

And just as quickly as it had appeared, it disappeared. The angry sensation petered out, only to be replaced by a…sad one?

"No," she muttered. "I'm fine…I'm sorry, Rangiku-san, but I really do have to work…It's my job after all. I have to do what I'm supposed to or else…" She trailed off.

The strawberry-blond lieutenant processed this. The girl looked so…dismal it was almost heartbreaking. She hadn't looked like this for quite some time now…

_She looks so…lonely. But why?_

Aria was simply sitting by herself, staring off into space. There was not a sound about, no one around whatsoever. She was sitting up straight, and at first it looked like a proud motion. But upon closer inspection, her body was too rigid, too tight to be considered pride. Rangiku recognized it as a last resort, a way to keep her from falling apart. Captain Hitsugaya's attitude this morning, along with Aria's reaction at the mention of his name, flashed through her mind.

Rangiku may be laid back, but she was no idiot. She could put two and two together.

"Aria…" she called. Her eyebrows scrunched together as she scrutinized the third seat.

A slight nod of the head signaled her acknowledgement. She was trying her best to produce legible handwriting, but the lieutenant noticed the peculiar way her hand shook.

"Aria…Did something happen…Between you and the captain…?"

The girl jolted so abruptly that the brush veered off the paper, splattering its owner with thick, black ink. Aria gave a soft cry as she beheld her ruined uniform. She tried to wipe it off with her sleeve, which only made things worse. Oddly enough, the brush had hit Aria's chest, which spread into a large, shapeless blot, as if there was a stain on her heart…

"Shoot! Stupid, bloody brush…" Aria growled under her breath. Without thinking she tried to rub it out with her hand, only to get ink all over her palm. Rangiku heard her swear quietly.

"Aria…?"

"Bloody thorns, this isn't going to work… This is just a waste of my time, it is… I don't have to deal with this…"

"Aria! Look at me!"

She cringed and turned to face Rangiku with an almost…fearful expression.

"Y-yes, Rangiku-san?"

"Tell me what happened between you and Captain Hitsugaya." There was a strict, stern tone to her voice.

She blinked and swallowed, making a large gulp sound. The woman saw the way her lip trembled, as if she was resisting the urge to cry. Aria bit her lip and her eyes flickered to the side.

"C-Captain Hitsugaya? Why him? I don't know what you're talking about!" She forced a laugh and grinned. Well, "grin" being a very generous term. Aria's lips turned up but it didn't have the mirth to make it a genuine smile. Something useful Rangiku learned over the years was that a person smiled truthfully the edges of their eyes would crease. Aria's eyes did not fold at all. They were as hard as emeralds themselves, but held none of their previous shimmer that the lieutenant had known so well.

"You're hiding something. Both of you are." The woman's eyes narrowed. She was losing her carefree attitude and slowly replacing it with the authoritative lieutenant personality that few ever got to see.

"I…I don't know what you're talking about…"

Rangiku sighed. "Don't lie to me, Aria, you're terrible at it. Well, not at lying, but at hiding your emotions. A blind person can tell that there's something really bugging you; it might as well be written all your face. Captain's been acting really weird lately too; something big must've happened for him to be able to show at least a little bit of it. You two can be so similar but so different!"

Aria's mouth tightened, but she said nothing.

"So what happened? I don't think it's bad if you tell me, eh? C'mon! No need to be shy!"

The third seat stared blankly at her lap, the inky stain on her clothes forgotten. Rangiku thought she saw her lips moving but it could have been her imagination.

Suddenly she rose, heading for the door.

"Ah, Aria, wait a moment!" Rangiku called. She scrambled up, trying to follow her.

"Don't bother, Rangiku-san," Aria muttered.

"Huh?"

"I'm just…going to change. And then I'm coming back to work. Sorry, maybe another time. Maybe you could get me a souvenir or something…"

"Aria, don't be like this. Having one person who won't tell me anything is bad enough."

She paused at the door, hand on the handle.

"I'm nothing like him," she whispered. Rangiku leaned in, trying to hear.

"I'm not like him at all…We're leagues apart…I can't ever reach him… Never…"

The lieutenant looked at her, concerned. "Aria…?" she called.

"Nothing happened," she replied robotically. "Captain Hitsugaya didn't do anything. There is absolutely nothing between me and that man." She opened the door and vanished with a clack.

The lieutenant blinked. She had been brushed off…Again. What was going on?

_She said "Captain Hitsugaya" and then "that man,"_ Rangiku thought. _Distancing language… She's hiding something._

With a sigh, she bent down and picked up Aria's work, flipping through it. She decided she would finish it, just as a favor towards Aria. There wasn't much left to do anyway. Besides, she overworks herself too much…

And then she said "nothing between me and that man". Did she miss some words or something? No… Maybe…

Rangiku tucked the pages beneath her arm and went inside. There was someone she needed to find.

*****

"Sawahata!"

The blond boy jumped and turned around, eyes widening in surprise at the sight of his lieutenant. She ran up to him and stopped, keeling over.

"Whoa," she gasped. "I'm really getting outta shape. Do you think I should lose a couple pounds or what?"

Takumi twitched and said not a word. He knew better than to make any sort of comment about a woman's weight.

Rangiku didn't notice his lack of a response, and continued on. She straightened up and tried to appear nonchalant.

"Morning. Lieutenant Matsumoto," the fourth seat greeted. Rangiku looked up and gave a sheepish smile.

"Hey, how's everything, Sawahata? I just came by to ask you—"

"Hey, blondie!"

A hand shot out from behind, smacking the unsuspecting fourth seat in the back of his head.

"OW!! FOR THE LOVE OF—"

As he struggled to recover, a girl emerged from behind the boy. With short, cropped copper hair and serious gray eyes, Kozue Iwahara commanded the atmosphere with an almost boyish manner.

"Hiya, Takumi. Hello, Lieutenant. How are you?"

"Just fine, until you took the unwelcome liberty of smacking me…" Takumi muttered.

"Um… I'm fine, Iwahara, thanks for asking…" Rangiku answered, slightly stunned at the Soul Reaper's sudden appearance and tomboyish attitude. Clearing her throat, she moved on.

"Anyway… Back to my question… Sawahata, I was meaning to ask you. Lately, the captain and Aria have been acting a bit off and I just can't figure out why. I think something happened between the both of them, but those two fools won't budge. Any ideas?"

Takumi's bright blue eyes blinked and his face scrunched up, as if he was uncomfortable with something. Right when he was about to open his mouth, however, Kozue suddenly cut in.

"I think they got into a fight about something," she shot out casually.

"Oh, about what?"

Takumi looked to the side with an annoyed face. "I just love how you always steal my lines…"

"I don't know. I wasn't there. But I did hear some shouting, and that's saying somethin', since I was pretty far off…"

"Hmm…"

"I mean, you show no common courtesy whatsoever…"

"I heard rumors that she ran out of the office and she was even crying. I even heard one where she ran out and the room was totally _wrecked_. But since there wasn't anyone around I kinda doubt that happened…"

Rangiku frowned. Aria? Crying? She didn't like the sound of that…

"Do you know what they were supposedly fighting about?"

"I mean, what kind of woman just randomly comes in and blurts out whatever she wants…?"

"No idea. I didn't even know they'd get in a fight in the first place."

"True… That's why it's bothering me so much…"

"What is the world coming to, these days…?"

"Captain's been acting pretty weird lately… He almost looks depressed."

"I know… Aria's almost as sad as she did when we first met her…"

"You've really got no decency, do you? No one's going to want you as their wife…"

"OH, WOULD YOU JUST SHUT UP ALREADY?!"

With fierce ferocity, Kozue pivoted expertly and kneed Takumi…

…Right in the family jewels.

The older woman stared in shock as Takumi groaned, his face contorted in pain.

_What…the…?_

"Why…do they always aim there…?" he whimpered before falling to the floor. Kozue twitched.

"Anyway… I sure do hope they make up soon, because they look so nice when they get along… Hey! I just remembered! You were there, weren't you, Takumi?"

Seeming to have forgotten that she had just hit him in a rather delicate area, the Soul Reaper immediately reached down and pulled him up, oblivious to the tears being squeezed out of his eyes.

"Oh come on! I didn't hit you that hard! You'd think that guys would be used to this kind of stuff!"

"What's that…supposed to mean…? And I'd… like to see you… get hit there…"

"Yeah, okay, sure. Anyway, spill it. I know you were there around the time they had their argument. You probably heard every word, since they were yelling pretty loud…"

"You can't order me around," Takumi growled, before kicking Kozue right in the caboose.

"Ow! Hey, what was that for?! You idiot, you're going to get it!"

"You started it, you crazy woman! And don't you think—Hey, hey, don't touch me there! Get away, get awa—OUCH! HEY! FOUL PLAY! FOUL PLAY!"

Rivers of sweat beaded down Rangiku's head as she watched the two bicker violently. They seemed to have completely forgotten about her presence. Holding up her hands she backed away slowly.

_"You little perv, stop trying to grab my chest!"_

"I'm not trying to! Why the heck would any guy want to grab _you_, anyway?!"

"Don't try to fool me! I know about those magazines you hide under your bed! And hey! "

"Um…" Rangiku stuttered. "I'll… I'll just go then…" _These guys sure are…enthusiastic…_

"What? Oh no, no, no, don't go, Lieutenant!"

Kozue immediately dropped—or flung, which seemed like a better term—Takumi, whose head hit the hard floor with a thump. Rangiku swore she heard a crack.

Now that he was subdued, she proceeded to haul him up by the shirt and shook him.

"Time to spill it, you big idiot! What did Aria and the captain argue about?"

The fourth seat, who was dazed from his head collision with the floor, blubbered out a response.

"He said… something about her… being a waste of space…"

"What? I can't hear you! Speak up!"

"He said Aria was… a waste of his time… And he said she was useless."

Kozue and Rangiku stared at him in shock. The boy continued.

"… And a hopeless case… He sounded like he meant it…

"Said something about not caring if her reiatsu went rampant… And not caring if people hated her…Oh, and one more thing…"

The two women were deathly silent.

"I remember… He said, 'You can go rot alone in a ditch for all care!' Uh huh, that's what he said… Haha, purple gumdrops with jam on top please…" Having been put through too much, Takumi's head fell back, his tongue lolling.

In silence Kozue held the stunned boy by the collar for a few more moments before coming to and shaking him violently.

"Hey, hey, Takumi! Wake up! You're kidding, right? You've got to be joking!"

Realizing that he wasn't going to become coherent any time soon, the girl dropped him carelessly again, heaving a sigh.

"Well… I'm hoping that he was kidding, since the kid is such a joker, but…" She cast a distraught glance at the unconscious boy. "Do you really believe he said that, Lieutenant…?"

"…I'm going to kill him."

Startled, Kozue glanced up and jolted. The lieutenant's carefree expression seemed to magically vanish, replaced by a very murderous one. The copper-haired Soul Reaper was suddenly very cowed by the homicidal aura Rangiku was emitting.

"Lieu…tenant…?"

"I'm. Gonna. Freaking. Kill that guy."

Practically cowering in the corner, Kozue watched fearfully as Rangiku pivoted angrily and marched off, a dangerous glint in her eye.

Once she was sure she was gone, she shakily came out of her corner and seemed to finally notice Takumi face down in the floor. Shuddering she shook it off as she approached the comatose fourth seat. With a sigh, she carelessly jabbed him with her foot.

"What are we going to do…?"

*****

"CAP_TAIN_!!!"

The startled boy jumped, spilling ink all over himself.

"Oh great... Matsumoto, what the h—"

The door burst open to reveal a very irritated Rangiku. Tōshirō blinked in surprise as she marched in and slammed her hands onto the desk.

"Matsumoto, what is this—"

"You big jerk!" she roared. The boy blinked again.

"What in the world—"

"You idiot! You loud-mouthed, insensitive, inconsiderate, cruel _dickhead_!"

The boy glared at her and stood up.

"_What_ did you just say to me—"

"How could you?!" she cut in. "How could you say those things to her?!"

Tōshirō's glare fell away quickly and he stared at his lieutenant. "Wh…what?"

"Don't play dumb with me! I know about your 'fight' with Aria!" She stood up straight and crossed her arms. Rangiku stared down at her captain with a mad gaze before sighing disappointedly.

"Honestly… I thought better of you, Captain," she scolded. "How could you?"

Tōshirō's icy front fell like a crashing boulder. For a moment, his face was completely defenseless, bare for all to see. His eyes flickered downward minutely. Rangiku recognized the expression as shame.

"I…don't know what you're talking about…"

"Don't play dumb with me, Captain. You may be cold, but you're not heartless—thank goodness for that—and you're smart. You know that I know that you know what you did!"

The repetitive phrase made him twitch, but the shame was still there.

"How many times have I got to put this to you, Captain?" Rangiku sighed. "A woman's heart is more delicate than the thinnest glass vase in the world! Or actually, a better comparison would be a rose! You have to handle it with care or else you'll regret it~!"

The lieutenant was surprised at the arrival of pain and regret on Tōshirō's features, quickly hidden when he raised his hand to pinch the bridge of his nose.

"Yes, Matsumoto, I know… You've told me only a thousand times already…"

"So why don't you just apologize?"

"What?"

The woman rolled her eyes. "Yes, Captain, apologize. You go up to her and say you're sorry and then work things out from there. It's not brain surgery or anything." _Although, for him, it might be…_

At this statement, the boy seemed to finally break down his defenses. "You say that, Matsumoto, but it's not as easy as it looks…" he moaned.

"Oh really? Here then, let me paint a picture for you. Visualize yourself walking up to Aria, guilty as can be. You go up to her and say, 'Oh, Miyamoto! I'm sorry about what I said! Please forgive me!' Aria gets all teary and goes, 'Oh yes, Captain! I'll definitely forgive you!' And there you have it! Happily ever after! It wouldn't hurt to have some kissing and hugging action, either!"

He was not convinced. With a groan Tōshirō slumped back into his seat. Rangiku was immediately surprised at the guilt glimmering behind those normally cold blue eyes.

"I can't just do that…" he whispered.

"Sure you can! Look, look, I'll paint another picture for you—"

"That's not it!" he snapped. "Don't you get it? I made a terrible mistake! Those things I said to her… She will never forgive me for them, not even if I apologize a thousand times!"

The lieutenant stared at her captain in shock. Tōshirō's eyebrows twitched as he pushed his face over his face.

"She hates me enough already," he muttered. "No point in saying sorry and making myself look pitiful."

That last sentence made Rangiku narrow her eyes. Could it be that her captain was…

"I never thought I'd see the day," she said under her breath.

"What?"

"Oh, it's a tragedy… Is it the end of the world or something? Wow…"

"Matsumoto! What are you talking about?!"

"The day that Tōshirō Hitsugaya would be terrified out of his wits by a mere _girl_,"

His eyes flashed dangerously and he stood up sharply. "Who said I was scared?!"

"Well, Captain, it's obvious you're terrified of her rejection so you're just going to be hiding in your little corner and sulk without doing a thing. Bah! Who knew that the captain of Squad 10 was really just a frightened little rabbit?" Rangiku swayed loosely, a "who knew?" expression set on her.

Tōshirō scowled deeply. "Matsumoto… I'm not scared… I'm just…"

"Just what, Captain? Oh wait, I know! Afraid."

"…She'll never forgive me… Not after what I've done…"

His voice, which was still the same pitch, seemed to be hiding something under it. Rangiku's teasing mood suddenly ceased, and she peered at the boy worriedly.

"Captain…?"

His eyes were closed. "After all that… She can't forgive me, not ever… How can I apologize for that…?"

Rangiku suddenly realized that he was no longer talking about one person.

Wistfulness filled her heart, and her gaze turned sad. Even after all this time, he still couldn't…

"It really wouldn't hurt to apologize, Captain… Really…"

"…I can't…"

The past can be incredibly haunting. Rangiku had left this matter alone, knowing that her captain would want it that way, but to think he was still thinking about it… Even now, the problem still hadn't been resolved.

The three of them had avoided talking about it whenever they could, and so even after all these years the two still hadn't reconciled.

As the woman peered carefully at the boy, she could see vast, underlying amounts of pain overshadowing his normally cold face. Tōshirō was not suffering over just one guilty deed—no, he was suffering twice that much. Rangiku was surprised at this display of emotion from her superior. Steeling herself, she straightened her back with practiced skill.

"Captain, you really should—"

There was a faint sound of footsteps outside the door, and a familiar flicker of reiatsu.

"Rangiku-san? Are you there? Did you take the paperwork I was working on? I really need you to—"

The door slid open, and Aria suddenly came in view.

The silence was deafening. The atmosphere, once filled with buzzing activity, had turned into a sponge. It soaked up all the noise, bundling it to itself selfishly. You could have heard a pin drop.

Aria was the first to recover. Her eyes were still as stiff as emeralds, with none of their beauty.

"…Oh," she choked out. Rangiku noticed how she seemed to avert her gaze from the captain. "Oh… I'm s-sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt. I'll just go and—"

"Hold it, hold it, _hold it_!"

Rangiku lashed out, hooking the back of Aria's uniform. She fished her back in, shutting the door with a clack.

"This ends right here, right now!" she declared. She grabbed Tōshirō as well, pulling the two toward each other. Both of them made an effort to not look at each other, though Aria seemed more skilled at it, keeping her head forward but her eyes skillfully turned away. Tōshirō coughed, a mix of annoyance, anxiety and hostility.

"Alright you two! Time to make up!" the lieutenant announced. _Or make out_, she thought with perverted delight. _That would work just as well!_

"You two aren't meant to be mad at each other! We're going to stay in this room until you guys make up and everything's all hunky-dory again! Now let's get crackin'!"

Neither Tōshirō nor Aria made a move. They stood inches from each other, backs rigid. The captain had his chin held high, turned away. Aria, on the other hand, was looking downwards, her white hair cloaking her green gaze.

Rangiku just about felt ready to tear her hair out. And that was saying something, because she liked her hair.

"Oh, you two—never mind! I'll start then! Captain! Apologize to Aria-chan! C'mon, it's not that hard! All you have to do is open your mouth and say—"

"What if I don't want to apologize?" he whispered. The lieutenant gaped at him for a bit.

"Wh-what? Don't give me that! Just say 'sorry' and be done with it!"

"I don't see why I should. I have no reason to." His tone was cold and callous. Rangiku didn't notice the way Aria twitched.

A vein pulsed under Rangiku's attractive head, and she glared daggers at her superior.

"Captain, don't act stupid! I know you know that—"

"I have no reason to apologize," Tōshirō drawled. "I did nothing wrong."

The woman was about to snap a response, but someone else beat her to it.

"Did nothing wrong? Ha! Is that how you feel about everything? Who died and made you king?" Aria hashed out. Tōshirō's eyes narrowed at the sound of her harsh tone.

"Miyamoto. You will show me respect or else I'll—"

"You'll _what_? Throw me away? Call me names? Let me _rot in a ditch_ out in the middle of nowhere? Because that won't work. I've already been there. Sorry to knock you off your throne!"

Tōshirō's eyes were so cold that the room could have frozen over.

"Do you always have to be so _difficult_?" he snapped. "I swear, Miyamoto, I can name at least twenty other subordinates, all lower rank, who'd be three times as useful and manageable than you!"

Blood rushed to the girl's cheeks, and raw anger—and even a hint of pain—flickered beneath those rigid orbs.

"Manageable, huh? So, what you're saying is, you just can't stand anyone who doesn't follow what you say!" she spat. "You don't like anyone who won't agree with you so you just take it out on them! Who knew you were so self-centered?! You have to know _everything_ about _everyone_ like some guy with an overactive God complex! No one asked you to be king! So sorry to tell you that not everyone isn't lapping you up like dogs! Stop acting like the whole world revolves around the place you stand!"

Rangiku's heart immediately swelled as she spotted a hidden meaning behind Aria's words. Although she knew that the third seat did not mean to say a double entendre, the mention of gods and kings sent painful memories through her head. Tōshirō was not immune to this revelation either.

"_King_?" he hissed. "You think _I'm_ the one acting high and mighty? What about you? You walk these halls all haughty and standoffish and you act like you don't need anyone! You refuse help even when you know you need it and you are probably _out of your mind_!"

Aria's mouth pulled back into a sneer and she looked at her superior for the first time. Rangiku could see waves and waves of anguish rippling within her, and she looked ready to smash something. The frigid atmosphere Tōshirō was exuding clashed destructively with Aria's red hot aura.

_I have to stop this before—_

"Out of _my_ mind?! You think I'm out of _my_ mind?!" By now the girl was screaming.

"_I do_!" the older Soul Reaper roared back. "Sometimes I wonder why the _hell_ I even bothered taking you in, Miyamoto, because I swear upon my soul it is the _worst_ mistake I've ever made! I don't know what I saw in you! Because all I'm seeing here is a hopeless girl with no talent or skill whatsoever! Someone like you doesn't _belong_ in the Gotei 13! No one needs you, and nobody ever will!"

All of a sudden the crimson from Aria's face drained at a record-setting speed. She swallowed compulsively, and her face was left paler than it was before the argument had started. Her fingers twitched, and Rangiku thought she looked like she was about to reach for her _sword_.

"Th-this is _exactly_ why you'll always be alone!" Aria choked out. "Can't you understand that not everyone has to be as damn _perfect_ as you?! You act so mighty and dominant, as if you think that you're actually better than everyone else! No one likes the cold! No one likes you! How do you manage to keep _any_ of your friends when you act like a spoiled brat whenever something doesn't go your way?!"

What little blood that was left in Tōshirō's face also flowed away.

"Is it really so bad for me to show concern for others?" he forced out. "At least I actually put some thought into others' _feelings_."

Aria stared at him wide-eyed, clearly offended beyond words. Tōshirō continued relentlessly.

"Do you know how much _trouble_ I have to put up with not including you, Miyamoto?!" he inquired angrily. "I have to deal with all this damn trouble every single day, and you are certainly not making my job any easier! You are nothing but a _burden_ to me, Miyamoto. The last thing I need is some insufferable _drama queen_ sniveling at my side all the time!"

All the anger had dissipated from the girl, only replaced by petrified shock. She stared blankly at her captain, her mouth slightly agape. The captain seemed to get more enraged with each word.

"You let your emotions get the better of you, you whine about every single little thing that happens to you, you can't ever stay put in one place let alone follow simple orders, and you can't even hold a darn sword! What benefit do you bring to the squad?! You weigh everyone down and we have to clean up after you!

"You will never belong anywhere, you foolish girl! What made you think that you could fit in here, in the Gotei 13?! You trip over nothing and you're as slow as a snail! You can barely grasp things two feet in front of you and you act like a little_ child_. You will never belong in Rukongai, not at the Academy, and certainly not here!

"And what really kills me is how you can't do anything! You have no ounce of natural talent and every step you take seems to be going _backward_. You might as well have no arms at all, for all the good you're doing now! If you vanished tomorrow, I don't even think I'll be able to tell the difference! You're not worth anything, Miyamoto! No one needs you here! Not the squad, not your friends, and I certainly don't need a useless little monster like you!"

_SMACK._

Everything stopped. Words were abruptly erased and time itself seemed to freeze. Rangiku's mind swerved as she processed the scene before her.

Aria and Tōshirō were no longer arguing, but that minor detail wasn't very helpful. Aria had taken one step forward, her pained eyes staring straight ahead. Her hand was raised to the side, turned in the same direction as her captain's face.

Tōshirō's face was turned to the side, with an obvious look of astonishment set on it. His eyes were as wide as dinner plates, and on the cheek turned towards Aria was an angry pink welt.

The lieutenant gaped at them, so intensely that her jaw might have fallen to the floor.

_Sh-she… _

What almost shocked her just as much was when she saw the slight livid red tint sliced at the bottom of Aria's jade eyes.

"Fine..." Aria whispered hoarsely. "Fine…If that's what you want, then fine. I'll go away then. I'll disappear and all of you can go on with your lives happily. I'm…obviously not needed here, so there's no use for me to stay."

She backed away clumsily, nearly tripping over her feet. But her eyes never strayed from her captain, and she seemed frustrated that he still refused to look at her.

"Aria-chan…"

"I…thought…you were different. I thought you had promised me…"

Blinking, Rangiku thought back to those long months ago when they had first met Aria. She remembered the vow that Captain Hitsugaya had made when they found her in the tree.

_"Do… do you promise… that you won't…call me a monster…and…abandon me?"_

_"I promise I won't hurt you."_

It was so long ago that the woman had already forgotten about it. But this slight mention of it would bring it up clear as day.

She wondered if her captain could remember as well.

"I thought…you would actually keep your promise…"

Aria was not looking at either of them anymore. She stared at the ground, heaving. And frustratingly enough Tōshirō still would not look at her.

Rangiku watched as Aria raised her head, and something sharp pierced her chest when she saw broken, uneven tears streaming down the girl's pale face. Her eyes were narrowed, and she seemed to be trying very hard not to break down. And with a clear voice full of conviction and betrayal, she spoke.

"No one ever keeps their promises to me."

She turned around sharply and exited the room, closing the door loudly.

The room was once again plunged in silence.

In what seemed like an eternity, the frozen statue finally moved. His white head turned back to the side, seemingly oblivious to the red mark that was forming on his cheek. At the first sign of movement, Rangiku turned and gave him the scariest glower she had ever made so far.

_He broke his promise. And he made her cry._

Some things just couldn't be forgiven.

She approached him, ready to give him the worst verbal thrashing he had ever received (besides the one that just occurred). But when she got close enough to see his face she realized that his fingers were lightly pressed against the cheek that Aria had slapped. Tōshirō's turquoise eyes stared downward, and they revealed a deep, remorseful look. She had only seen this look one other time, and that was years ago, concerning an event that was considered taboo if mentioned…

Tōshirō closed his eyes and swallowed. His hand was still against his face as he turned away and walked to the back of the room. Instead of sitting in the chair, he leaned against the wall, staring blankly out the window. His fingers brushed over his cheek over and over, as if he was giving himself a constant reminder.

"Captain…"

His eyes were hidden. "I…broke my promise…" His voice cracked.

"Captain, I…"

"…No matter what I do… I just keep hurting them… I…didn't mean to…"

Rangiku took a deep breath and approached her captain, trying to find some way to give him the emotional support he needed. She placed a hand on his shoulder and tried to ignore how he flinched.

"Captain, if you want some advice… I think you should go to her and apologize…"

"They'll never forgive me… I've hurt them too much…"

_He keeps saying "they."_

The Soul Reaper bit her lip. "…It won't hurt to apologize. You can't make things any worse than they already are. Go ahead and try; I know it'll work."

Tōshirō said nothing.

"Tōshirō Hitsugaya…" she called out, her voice barely above a whisper. "I have one thing to say to you…"

His head twitched in her direction, an indication that he was listening.

"…If she died today, how would you feel? If she completely left your life and never returned, what would you do?"

The boy tensed in minute pain but gave no response. After all, Rangiku was not talking about just one person.

"You would be asking yourself for the rest of your life why you didn't talk to her. You would regret it, and it would only hurt much more because you didn't try. Ask yourself this, Captain Hitsugaya: What does she mean to you? What would you be willing to do for her?"

He was still silent, although Rangiku could sense an aura of quiet solemnity descend upon him. It was not quite peace, but it was the closest thing. Knowing she could do no more, she patted his shoulder reassuringly and headed for the door. She waved absently.

"I'll see you later, Captain."

The slider door clacked behind her, and Rangiku looked around for any sign of Aria. Unfortunately she was completely gone; she couldn't sense a trace of her. Leaning against the wall, the woman pinched the bridge of her nose and squeezed her eyes shut.

This would be a lot harder than she thought.

**

* * *

***This is one of those times when I'm glad that this wasn't canon, or else I don't think my heart could take all the drama. *grimaces*  
**

**Are most of you surprised they didn't make up in this chapter? To be honest, if they had, I would have been _very _surprised. Not to mention a bit cliche... **

**Okay, just want to clear this up. You're probably absolutely aghast that Shiro here called Aria a monster. Well, I just wanted to say that he did _not_ mean that the way others have meant it. You know how sometimes an older sister/brother would call their younger sibling a monster because they're being really annoying and stuff? Well, that's kind of what Shiro is going along here, but still... It didn't come out quite as non-offending as he had planned... Okay it was _really _offending anyway...  
**

**The scene with Takumi, Kozue, and Rangiku was totally random... But I wanted to add those two in a little bit more since I really want you guys to get to know them a bit more. Uh, yeah, if you're wondering, Kozue does hit Takumi on a regular basis. He got used to it after she started hitting him about five times a day.  
**

**I wonder how many of you understood all that hush-hush kind of stuff Rangiku was hinting at throughout the second half of the chapter. *twiddling fingers evilly* Wahahaha. This should be fun... (No, I'm not trying to be sadistic here...) **

**So... Love it? Hate it? Can't decide? Or you just want to rant about the weather you've been having? Leave a review and tell me what you think!  
**


	28. Asphodel

*****LE GASP! IT'S ME AGAIN! Yes, I'm still alive. I've just been under a bunch of work, and unfortunately I'm procrastinating at this moment... **

**So the next chapter of _The Seed Shrouded by Night _is finally up! Again, no beta for this one, so please check if there are any mistakes? I swear this time I triple-checked this one, so much that my eyes are beginning to hurt... Anyway, any corrections are much appreciated!**

** I decided to do something different and put sort of an omake at the end. If it doesn't quite work, I might just take it down. But it'll probably be one of the few-if not the only-omake I'll ever put up. What can I say? I'm humor-challenged. **

**Some POV changes, so watch out for the faint gray lines! Anyway, I had to change it a bit because FFN is being mean to me and won't let me put too many asterisks in a row, so POV changes are now double gray lines. Time passing but the same POV is a single line. Ugh... Now I'll have OCD and go back and change the rest...  
**

* * *

Autumn was—for lack of a better term—in full bloom. If you looked outside, you'd be amazed at the fiery foliage contrasted against the blue sky. Leaves shifted from lush greens to vibrant oranges and reds, and soon the entire ground looked as if it was engulfed by gingery flames. This vermillion season was short-lived, however, as there was already a chill in the air that signified the impending arrival of winter.

_How boring_, a lone captain thought absently.

Tōshirō leaned back in his chair, seeming to have found something interesting on the ceiling. One hand slung behind his head, the other tapped the surface of his desk, as if he had something on his mind. No matter how hard he tried, he could not devote his whole attention on the task at hand.

But what was it? Was it the blasted paperwork sitting in front of him or… a certain girl that kept creeping back into his mind?

He had done everything. Taken walks around the courtyard. Found people to talk to. Impossibly buried himself under even more work. But it was futile. Aria Miyamoto refused to leave him.

He couldn't stop from thinking about her at this very moment. He could clearly remember the swish of her hair, those piercing emerald eyes. That clumsy shuffle and that placid demeanor.

Along with her, there were memories of… other recent events.

_Stupid, stupid, stupid…_ he chastised himself for the umpteenth time. Tōshirō knew he deserved more than a simple mental beating; he deserved what seemed like a thousand thrashings. He would willingly take punishment, if it meant she would forgive him.

Yet there was no one around, as they had all left him to wallow in his own remorse. Which, he thought, seemed to be an equally suitable sentence.

Why, oh why did he say those things? He had wracked his head so many times to try to come up with an answer, something to justify his actions. But nothing fit, and it all boiled down to one thing: lack of self control.

_I'm such an idiot._

He could not count the number of times he had told himself that. He was a fool, losing his temper. Aria had not even done anything to him; she was just an unfortunate victim that had happened to be at the wrong place at the wrong time. Stress was truly a horrible thing.

Tōshirō could see her on the backs of his eyelids. He could clearly recall that horribly pained face the first night he had shouted at her. That one tear she shed that evening was indelible, as if a rusty dagger had permanently carved the memory into him. He had said things he never meant, nor would he ever mean them. He wished words were retractable, like a purchase. But life just wasn't easy like that.

And to add to those regretful recollections, there was that more recent shouting match they had… After it had happened and he had successfully cooled down, Tōshirō reveled in amazement at Aria's daring. When push came to shove, she was not afraid to stand up for herself, albeit in a less-than-suitable manner. Her temper was truly something to behold, enough to match his own, maybe even go beyond it. If she wanted to be, she could be someone to genuinely fear.

Tōshirō crossed his arms, scowling. The office was quieter than usual. Far off he could hear some bustling activity, but it seemed to be farther off than normal. It was too quiet to be left unnoticed. If he was being honest to himself, he would admit that he missed his warm third seat. She had a flare in her that would immediately warm a room to a pleasant temperature—at least that was how he saw it. He had grown accustomed to it and, without meaning to, started to enjoy it. He would spend the majority of his time just watching and smiling faintly beneath his hand, which he used to hide his face. She just had that effect on him.

And yet… He had ripped apart her heart like no one else had.

Tōshirō wanted nothing more than to take back every word he had said. Every last syllable was a lie—utter blasphemy. He had never thought he was capable of saying those things.

_"No one ever keeps their promises to me."_

He winced, feeling a stab of deep remorse. What had she meant by that? Had there been others like him? Others that had, time and time again, let her down?

Maybe that was why she was always alone. No matter how much they denied it, loners never enjoyed the solitude. It was just that this world, and everyone in it, kept letting them down, and they just couldn't bear any more disappointment.

Why was it that he couldn't stand seeing her miserable? Not because of the usual reasons, but for some reason if he ever saw her sad he would take it personally. Images flickered past him: those innocent eyes, those pulled back lips, those heartbreaking tears…

Seeing her cry… made him feel like the whole world was weeping with her.

Gruffly pushing away from the desk, he stood up, stretching his legs. He had been in a working frenzy for the past few days, just to keep his mind distracted. Maybe another walk…?

But before he could touch the door, something caught his eye. It was a vase, sitting solemnly on the corner of the table. A vase full of dead, withered flowers.

The captain wasn't surprised. How long had it been since Aria had even stepped foot in this room, let alone tend to it? He couldn't even remember what kind of flowers they were. With a soft sigh he reached over and plucked out an expired blossom, planning on cleaning it out.

But then he stopped as it began to crumble.

Piece by piece, the perished bloom fell apart, and the scraps fluttered to the ground, irrevocable and permanent.

For some reason, this was too much for him to bear. Forgetting about the wilted bouquet he quickly sprinted out the door. There was something he had to do.

_

* * *

What am I doing here…?_

Tōshirō stood on a thick tree branch, leaning tensely against the trunk. The thick leaves overhead gave him sufficient cover, but every now and then a breeze would blow and the tree would sound like it was whispering, as if it had so many secrets to share, like the one that was standing on it right now.

Idly he wondered what it was like to speak to plants. Did Aria prefer them more than the company of actual people?

Again and again he wanted to leave and double back to his own barracks. This place was in its own way unknown territory; it was so rare for him to be near the Squad 5 barracks nowadays, let alone inside them.

But he wanted to see something, just this once. He thought it might ease at least a tiny bit of the tight knot in his stomach. Either that, or it would make it worse. He wouldn't know until he tried.

He felt someone approaching and quickly stepped under the shadows.

The door slid open, and a girl ambled out. She had a sweet appearance with a soft, round face and kindhearted brown eyes. Her dark hair was tied up in a bun by a light-colored cloth. On her left arm was a badge that had the number five and an insignia inscribed on it.

Her cheeks were tinted a healthy pink as she inhaled the crisp autumn air. Pushing off some leaves that had strayed on the balcony with her feet, she paced in front of the door, as if expecting something. She didn't seem to give any sign that she knew she was being watched.

Tōshirō's eyes swept over her quickly. He searched for any sign of fatigue, worry, anything that would make her look sick and tired. But she looked absolutely healthy, full of lush life as if her future, present, and past were as clear as a summer's day.

He hoped fervently that she was genuinely happy.

Even if they didn't speak to each other… This was at least the one thing he could do.

How long had it been since they had last talked? A few weeks? Months? Perhaps even a whole year had gone by and he had not once paused to think of visiting…

Over the years a wall had been unconsciously built between them. Words that weren't spoken, actions that weren't taken, eventually all piled up, producing a gap neither could cross. Certain memories pushed them away from each other, and neither could summon the strength to fight back.

Within the building, a muffled voice chimed. The girl returned with a holler and started for the door, having had her break. But right as she stepped through the doorway, she paused, and looked behind her, incredibly close to where Tōshirō was hiding. He immediately tensed, wondering if she had seen him.

But his worries were for naught as she shrugged, darting back inside and sliding the door shut.

Releasing a bated breath he carefully stood up from his perch in the tree. For an autumn's day, it was unnaturally sunny. There was a perfect blend of blue sky and clouds and the sun was warm, though not unbearable. In a petulant way, he thought this was unfair. It seemed like the entire world was so happy and perky while he was just sitting there in a puddle of regret.

He admitted he felt… _slightly_ lonesome.

His idle curiosity sated—though he was far from satisfied—Tōshirō carefully stepped off his barky roost. The tree he was just hiding in was one of the few that still had some vestiges of green, though they were hidden beneath the orange. Although they were shaded and would probably change color soon, they fluttered in the wind with a vibrant liveliness. He was inadvertently reminded of Aria's eyes. They drilled into him, hard and accusing, trying to pry apart the strings that held his soul together. Would he make the same mistake again?

He had to fix this.

* * *

Was it an unspoken side effect that came with captaincy, sneaking around? When you were an expert at shunpo, Tōshirō supposed they really couldn't help themselves, but lately he had been doing a lot of it…

As he left the sanctuary of the tree, he focused his mind on finding Aria's reiatsu. It wasn't hard; he could find it in a crowd of millions just because he was so used to it. Besides, it still leaked a bit, something he hoped he could help with if ever given the chance again.

He tracked her to a small gardened area, a place where Soul Reapers would often go to when they needed a short break. There were two other people with her: Kozue Iwahara and Takumi Sawahata.

The captain was not at all surprised at this. Lately it felt as though the girl was with those two more and more than he'd ever seen her. She avoided the lieutenant probably to evade her inevitable pestering, and him… Well.

But why did he have the feeling that the both of them—well, it was more the fourth seat than anything—seemed to almost be steering her away? Despite the fact that they weren't speaking to each other, Tōshirō still kept relatively close tabs on his subordinate. Ever since that shouting match, he had tried to find a way to talk to her alone, but every time he would attempt it somehow Takumi would cut in and cart her away, as if he knew what the captain was up to. Usually it was with something innocent and recreational, but it still worked. Tōshirō had not been successful in his endeavors whatsoever.

_So be it. If he wants to play that way, I sure as hell won't lose._

Quietly but quickly Tōshirō maneuvered around various obstacles. As the busy season still had not ceased, Soul Reapers were still bustling about, shouting orders and carrying their work with them. The good thing was that it was steadily getting better. He made a mental note not to get so stressed during this time of year in the future…

Soundlessly he sauntered outside, where Aria was just a few yards away. Masking his reiatsu like before, Tōshirō strolled around, pinpointing where her exact location was. When he finally found her, she was sitting with her two friends under the shade of a large oak tree. With a strong push he propelled himself up onto the tree, repeating his actions. He stood there for several seconds, silently watching.

Aria, with her long white hair, was quite noticeable between the two taller Soul Reapers, but at the same time she could have been invisible. With her shoulders hunched, she looked as though she was trying to squeeze herself into the tiniest space possible, as if she wanted to go undetected. Her left arm was in a heavy brace which seemed to allow her fingers some mobility. With difficulty they held onto a block of wood, while her right hand grasped a small whittling knife. She clumsily plunged the blade into the wood over and over in an attempt to carve it, but she only seemed to be flicking blobby chunks out of it.

Tōshirō's eyes narrowed drastically at the sight of the brace. When had she gotten it? He hadn't heard anything about that!

_Of course you hadn't_, a tiny voice told him. _She's not speaking to you, remember?_

Consciences could be quite annoying when they talk.

Her expression was one of blank passiveness, yet there was a slight pensive look to it. She did not seem to notice the two chatterers next to her, even when they continued to shoot worried glances down at her.

He was so close… If only he could just step out and…

"You're mental! Absolutely mental, you insane ratbag!" Kozue Iwahara hollered.

Tōshirō was jolted out of his reverie as the girl's commanding voice carried over.

"C'mon, Kozue, is that really a way for a girl to talk…?" Takumi replied in a low tone, as if he wasn't putting much effort into what he was saying.

"Screw that! What the heck are you _thinking?_ Pulling a prank on a _captain?_ Don't come crying to me when your worthless caboose gets blasted off, or worse!"

"Oh lighten up, you shrew. I'm not gonna be found!"

"You don't get how sharp the captains can be! They can hide their presences without blinking an eye! One of them could be listening right now!"

"Sure, Kozue, whatever you say… Paranoid worm…" he muttered skeptically.

"What did you just say?"

"Nothing, nothing…!" Nonetheless Takumi cautiously looked around, as if he really was checking for eavesdroppers. The hidden captain suppressed the urge to cough. Kozue continued her frantic tirade.

"Not to mention what'll happen when you get caught! You'll be in so much trouble!"

"You say 'when'. Who says I'll get caught?"

"Well duh you'll get caught! You're not in the Stealth Force, and I doubt even they could pull of getting past their own captain, let alone the others, because there's no way Captain Soi Fon would let that slide past her…"

"Right…"

"No, really! I've heard some crazy stories about this kind of stuff?"

"Oh yeah? Like what?"

Kozue's voice dropped drastically in volume, and for some reason Tōshirō leaned in to listen.

"I heard Captain Kyoraku was looking for his girlfriend one time to give her a gift for their anniversary, you know? He wanted it to be a surprise, so he hid his reiatsu and used shunpo to sneak around! He finally found her, okay, but since she didn't know he was there she went ahead and met this other guy. That's right, she was cheating on him! Captain Kyoraku went absolutely ballistic! The girl was never seen again!"

Takumi looked like he was resisting the urge to roll his eyes. So was the eavesdropping captain. "Somehow, I have a hard time imagining 'Captain Kyoraku' and 'ballistic' in the same sentence… Wait a minute, he actually had a girlfriend?"

"I'm telling you, it's true!" The girl's tone was indignant. She paused before saying, "Well, the ballistic part, at least…"

Shaking his head, Tōshirō drew his eyes toward Aria. Her face was the exact same as before, and she gave no sign that indicated she had heard anything that had just been said. She seemed to only want to concentrate on the piece of wood in her hands, as if she wanted to pull it apart…

Takumi scoffed. "Sure, sure… Geez, Kozue, you really should get that pole outta your butt; you're so uptight you should probably start wearing starched dresses or something. Don't you think so, Aria?"

She gave no response, her only motion was jabbing the dagger into the wood. The two other Soul Reapers cast a concerned glance.

"Oi! Granola-for-brains!" the fourth seat called. He poked her several times in the face before Aria swatted him away.

"What?" she replied, slightly annoyed. Tōshirō noted the change in her. Her voice was quiet, almost muted, as if she had to drag it out of herself.

_She doesn't want to be noticed…_ As if _that_ would ever work…

Aria was so quiet… It was hard to believe that a few weeks ago he had been seeing a fiery side to her. It was almost like when he had first met her…

"You really should stop spacing it out; it's rude," the blond boy laughed.

"Takumi!"

"What? I'm only telling the truth! Don't tell me you don't agree with me!" He leaned in real close to Aria's face, who leaned back, and Tōshirō did not like their close proximity one bit.

"C'mon, Aria, we all know what's going on here. And moping around isn't going to solve anything. It's really not good for you."

"Shut up, Takumi, you insensitive sack of dung!" Kozue aimed a kick at the boy's shins, and he jumped away lithely.

"I'm not kidding, Aria. Sulking won't make the situation any better. Quit putting on that sad face and smile, okay? It suits you more."

For once the boy had something right… It would be better if she would smile again…

Aria returned to her whittling dismissively. Tōshirō could see the lifelessness in her eyes. "I wish it were that easy… Maybe…"

"Maybe's not good enough! Get up and do something for a change, instead of me and Kozue dragging you around like a dead body! If you do, it might even heal your arm faster. Batty over here agrees with me, but just doesn't want to admit it." He gestured toward Kozue.

"Don't drag me into this! And who are you calling Batty?"

"The tree next to you, that's who," he answered sardonically, which earned him another kick.

"I _really_ can't stand you…" Kozue seethed.

Tōshirō was feeling a bit tired of this, and wondered how on earth his third seat could deal with these two. She looked between then in exasperation before silently returning to her work.

_At least she's in good hands… I think._

"_Anyway_," Takumi drawled, rubbing his shin, "this isn't healthy at all, Aria. Take up a hobby and live a little! We're trying our best here, but you have to do something too. Don't you want to be happy?"

The girl made a face while continuing to stab the block of wood. It looked as though she was doing it with more force than before…

He had no idea how much damage he had really done… Tōshirō scrutinized her, wondering if she had gotten thinner or it was simply his imagination. How heavy was that weight on her chest?

He wanted to smooth out that crumpled face, just to see her smile again… She so rarely did it; it was a nice change…

The fourth seat was still talking.

"…Kozue agrees with me, but she's too chicken to say…"

"Hey!"

"Wouldn't it be better, Aria, if you just forgot about this whole thing…?"

Tōshirō thought her eyes flashed for a moment, and her hand jolted so violently that the knife it held cut across her exposed fingers.

Forgetting about stealth, the captain leaped up from his perch, expression alarmed.

_She just slashed herself! Don't just sit there and do nothing!_

Her wellbeing was more important that his twisted spying. He moved, preparing to move down the tree himself. He would explain to her later.

_Foolish girl, always doing things like this… How could I ever let her near a sword when she can't even—_

Tōshirō stopped himself there. His movements ceased as fresh guilt was slashed across his heart.

Fortunately, the other cut did not go unnoticed.

"Holy crud, she's bleeding!" Kozue exclaimed. She fumbled around her pockets, searching for something. "Takumi, get a first aid kit, and be quick about it!"

"Don't have to tell me!" The boy quickly rushed into building.

Surprisingly enough, Aria was the calmest of the three. Eyeing the cut across her palm with a grimace, she set aside the bloody whittling knife and shifted her arm, which was a bit difficult due to the brace. And yet, Tōshirō could see no sign of any chagrin on her.

Why did he have the feeling that she had done that on purpose?

"Here you go," the bronze-haired girl said, pressing a cloth to Aria's hand. "Do you have something against your left arm or something? Because I swear…"

The third seat's lips twitched upward minimally, but it disappeared again in that same pensive expression.

Knowing she would be taken care of, Tōshirō seated himself again, watching Aria carefully. If they were on better terms and he was the one down there, he would be fiercely lecturing her about being more careful. In his mind's eye, he could picture Aria's sheepish expression and apologetic smirk as he carefully took care of her hand.

He admitted it. He missed her.

"Well, the good thing is that the cut doesn't seem very deep…" Kozue mused. "You should be more careful next time though. No whittling until you get that brace off."

Aria shrugged nonchalantly. "It's okay… Doesn't really matter anyway…"

"What do you mean, it doesn't matter? Of course it does! You freaking stabbed yourself!"

"Hmm…" Her green eyes stared sorrowfully into the distance.

At her lack of concern, a new side of Kozue Iwahara emerged.

"That's it? That's all you can say? For goodness' sake, Aria, you are literally _killing_ yourself! Is this the best you can do? Because really, it's downright pathetic! All you do is mope around with that weird thinking face and you hardly do anything but work, work, work! I thought you had said you'd spar with me for a little bit one time? Maybe if you actually do something else, your arm will heal up a lot faster and you'll have less on your mind! Listen, I know it hurts, what Captain said to you, but you can't let those measly words get you down! He might have meant it, or he might not have, but Aria, here's something you're going to have to know for the rest of your life: words should never be allowed to control you this way!"

Cheeks aflame and breath heavy, Kozue settled back down into her seat. Aria was looking at her with a slightly awed—and chagrined—expression.

"Whoops, sorry, lost it for a bit there," the girl huffed. She shook her head violently before calming down.

"…No, it's fine, I'm used to it anyway," Aria said with a hint of dark humor. Tōshirō's chest constricted tightly for a moment.

The taller girl looked at her sympathetically. "Sorry about all this, Aria. I guess I'm not being very sympathetic, am I? And who am I to say that you shouldn't let words get ya down?" She shrugged and gave a nervous chuckle. "I know you've probably been through hell in the last few years… I can't possibly imagine how all this could be affecting you. I don't know exactly what went on in your past… I don't know how you're feeling right now… Heck, I might not know you at all! But I guess I should just say something. We're all here for you, for sure. Lieutenant Matsumoto, me, and even that ogre Takumi. You don't… You don't have to hold it all inside by yourself, you know?" She stopped speaking, clasping her hands in her lap.

Somehow, the female Soul Reaper had managed to put some of Tōshirō's feelings into words. All this time, he had helped Aria in hopes that she would reveal a little more about herself, so that there was a chance he could help her. He didn't want to see her be all alone anymore, because it was just so sad to watch. He would be there, if she ever needed him for something. As much as he might not look like it, he knew what it felt like not to fit in. It probably wasn't to the same degree as her pain, but at least he could offer a little comfort. The captain wanted his subordinate to talk to him, just so that it might relieve some of the ache she possessed. He had never outright demanded an explanation because he wanted to give her enough time to trust him.

But then Tōshirō began to think. Why _was_ it that she hardly ever spoke of her history? Why did she seem to prefer—if you could call it that—being by herself, in the shadows where no one would spot her? He had passed off simple excuses for ages, but now his curiosity was rekindled, brighter than ever. It wasn't that she was accustomed to being alone. It felt more like… she thought she had to. She pushed others away before they could push her away. That keeping them around was a bad thing. The question was, why? Her power seemed to be under control at the moment…

Was it possible to have experienced something so horrible, so devastating, that just speaking a little about it could completely unravel you?

For the first time, the young superior could finally put his heart into words. Aria Miyamoto was like a caged bird. Kept behind bars all its life, it never had the liberty to stretch its wings and learn what it meant to truly live. Because of that, it sealed its voice behind a lonely beak. She was a seed, eternally shrouded within darkness, unable to bloom. If this kept up, she would die, he knew that for certain.

He wanted to release her… Just so he could hear her sing.

"I'm really sorry, Aria, for everything I've said in the past," Kozue was saying. "A part of me wonders if I'll ever be able to make it up, and I also wonder if I'm part of the reason you're like the way you are now. Even some of my other friends say I'm a bit more snappish than needed… But I really do want to help you. Because, more than anything, I just want…

"I just want you to be free."

It suddenly got very quiet, save for the occasional rustling and birds chirping.

Tōshirō's mind raced to the future. He mused over what would happen if—no, when—the burden on his third seat's heart would finally be erased. He admitted it, he was curious. What would a liberated Aria be like?

Nearby, a small patch of roses was amazingly still alive. Some were already wilting, but others still radiated vivacious colors, full blossom and all.

When you have a seed, you don't see much. But plant it in the ground and give it a chance, and it could grow into something magnificent. Maybe something charming, like a rose, or something strong and unbreakable, like a willow tree. Nonetheless, if you give something the right care, it can flourish.

Perhaps… Aria was like that. All she needed was the right care.

_"It's like…planting a rose seed and trying to grow a tulip."_

All these people who poked at her and shoved her around, trying to get her to be someone else weren't helping anything. She could never reach her full potential this way. If he ever got that chance again, he'd make sure she was taken care of, the right way.

Kozue stood up, wrapping the piece of cloth around Aria's hand.

"I'm going to go look for Takumi," she grumbled. "That damn idiot probably got lost trying to find a first aid kit… Oh, I'm gonna kick him in the balls when he gets back… Anyway, stay put, okay? Don't want it bleeding anymore than it should."

The girl left, muttering threats under her breath.

Tōshirō carefully watched Aria, just to make sure she would stay put. But the small girl hardly made a sound. All she did was look up into the sky with a look of intense longing that he had never seen before.

"Free…" she said, rolling the word on her tongue. The captain could tell she truly relished the thought, as if she was imagining a perfect life right at this moment. But in a second the passion faded away, and she stared back down at her wounded hand.

"Free… How can I be free if people keep locking me up…?"

Tōshirō's throat tightened and his heart beat faster. Was she talking about him…?

He swallowed and stood up, eyes still glued to her. Turning around, he fled, having seen quite enough.

But perhaps he had left too soon. As Tōshirō disappeared, he didn't notice Aria turning her head toward the spot he had been. He didn't see the searching and puzzled look in her eyes, as if she was wondering if the key to her cage had been there all along.

_

* * *

_

* * *

Night fell. Once more the day made its endless cycle, the Sun passing the baton to the Moon, which would eventually give it back. This had been going on since the dawn of time, and it would keep on happening until the universe died. It just goes to show that no matter how stuck I was in one place, life would keep going. There were other people out there, and it didn't have the time to stop for one person. The thought made me sad.

Maybe Kozue was right… Maybe I should just move on from this whole thing. It would probably ease my mind and my heart a bit.

But could I really forget this? I see my captain every day, and I would see him every day if I chose to stay in this division. And as much as it killed me, I still wanted to see him. I liked my captain; he was a good friend of mine. I'm just wondering if he still liked me back, if he ever did in the first place.

When the day comes and he leaves me behind, would I be forgotten? Just like life, and how it never stops, not for anyone?

Tōshirō Hitsugaya was an amazing person… Strong, respected, assertive… The complete opposite of me, the hopeless child who always trips and hurts herself. It wouldn't be long before I was left behind.

Just like back then. I hadn't changed one bit. I would be abandoned, forsaken, all by myself.

Maybe this was the real reason I wanted to get stronger… So I could stay with the people I held dear…

At the moment, this was too much for me to think about. My mind was exhausted—from what, I didn't know—but my body felt endlessly restless. I trudged heavily into the room the captain and I shared. My extra bandages were bugging me, and I knew I wouldn't be able to sleep with my mind whizzing around like this. Once I was sure the captain was sound asleep, I would sneak out and take a quiet walk around the barracks. Nothing huge, since being alone in the dark wasn't a very appealing idea, but just enough to get the lull of sleep stirring. I felt so fortunate that my room was only days from being finished, maybe even tomorrow at best. Sleeping in the same room as him never gave me any peace at night.

It was strange. I thought I felt someone watching me this afternoon when I was waiting for Kozue and Takumi. But when I turned, there was no one there. Odd, it felt almost like it was…

Something else that was strange was that the nightmare from the first night had not returned. I had no idea how this had happened, but I had been grateful… And also cautious. I would do anything I could do to prevent it from coming back. It haunted me plenty during the day; I don't want it attacking me when I was most vulnerable.

I rolled over my plot in my head over and over as I changed into my sleepwear. The day had worn me out, so I would just take a small nap before getting up. Hopefully Captain would be asleep by then…

Automatically I plopped onto the bed, rolling over to my side. Just a nap, I told myself. Just for… a little… while…

_

* * *

_

* * *

At last, it was nighttime. Tōshirō could finally put his tired head to rest. If he didn't sleep more often, he'd never grow…

No doubt she would be there, like she always was. Her face turned obstinately toward the wall, her head under the covers… Just so she wouldn't have to look at him, and he wouldn't have to look at her.

He wanted to talk with her, more than ever.

But as the boy quietly stepped into the room, he came upon something strange. Aria was indeed asleep, but there weren't any covers over her. She simply lay on her side, her breathing even. She looked absolutely worn out.

While Tōshirō found this odd, it didn't stop him from getting ready for bed himself. He'd cover her up later.

But as he emerged back into the room, he saw something he didn't want to see.

Aria was having nightmares again. He could tell from the way she shivered, the agitated twitching of her eyelids. Even with all the recent happenings, he had still upheld the tradition of easing her ill dreams because of the guilt. If he couldn't talk to her, he could at least do this one thing right. There was no way he was going to stop now.

He strode over to the bed, peering over her. As usual, he was struck by her appearance. The way the moonlight hit her made her look so innocent… Not child-like, just something pure. It was hard to believe such a person could have suffered through anything.

But all you'd have to do is look at her face, and you'd know.

"Please… Don't leave me…" she whimpered almost inaudibly. Hearing that always made the boy frown. Who was she talking to?

Gently he placed a hand on her shoulder, rubbing her arm in an attempt to soothe her. As quietly as he could, Tōshirō slipped into the bed next to Aria, scooting close to her. He wrapped an arm loosely around her. That couldn't be counted as a hug, could it…?

In time, she quieted. Her body relaxed and she stopped trembling. But Tōshirō did not budge for some time.

For a while, he held her close. He didn't know why, he just did. For some reason, he felt more protective of her than ever. Was it the remorse that was doing that, or something else?

It didn't matter anymore, though. Aria wasn't talking to him. She stirred lightly beneath his arm, and he quickly sat up. She probably wouldn't wake up—the lucky sleepyhead—but he couldn't be too careless.

Tōshirō swiftly swung his legs over the edge of the bed, ready to move to his futon…

…Only for a hand to weakly wrap around his wrist and stop him.

"Cap…tain…?"

* * *

*****Crap. Please don't kill me. *hides behind titanium wall with bulletproof helmet...again* **

**Rangiku: I KNEW YOU WERE A STALKER, CAPTAIN! I JUST KNEW IT!  
Tōshirō**: **I'M NOT A STALKER!  
Rangiku: THEN WHAT THE HECK IS THIS?  
****Tōshirō: Uh...  
Rangiku: SEE? I KNEW IT! STALKER! **

**(Episode 132 reference there. This is sort of the hidden joke of the entire chapter. I know, not really funny. But still.) **

**Anyway, to distract the readers that are ready to flay me alive for that little cliffhanger I left up there, here's my first omake (that's probably not really funny)! This one stars Nanao and Kyoraku, and it's a bit... odd, so bear with me here. If it's bad I'll probably take it down... Now if you'll excuse me... *fortifies walls with Death Star lasers* **

**(P.S. Do you guys get the Squad 5 thingy up there? And yes, again, it's a reference to something that happened in the canon. Hint, hint.)  
**

_**

* * *

Omake **_

"A_choo_!"

Shunsui Kyōraku, captain of Squad 8, sniffled. Odd, he wasn't feeling under the weather at all, and autumn was such a _beautiful_ season… Maybe it was one of those weird bugs that usually go undetected for a few days.

The door opened, and Nanao Ise's head popped around the frame.

"Do you have a cold, Captain?" she asked. "I could get you some medicine, if you wanted…"

"Oh, no, no," the bearded man dismissed, adjusting his slightly askew hat. "It's probably just some beautiful lass out there talking about me." Little did he know…

Nanao rolled her eyes and walked in.

"This is the next set of reports you need to look over, Captain," she reported, placing a stack of paper on the desk. "It's not a huge pile, since I looked over a majority of it already and—what's with that face?"

Captain Kyōraku had a wistful, dreamy look in his eye as Nanao was talking. It wasn't a normal look by any means, but that didn't mean it was out of character.

"Captain Kyōraku…? Is everything alright…?" She hoped she wouldn't regret the question.

"Oh, sweet Nanao-chan…" Shunsui sighed. The lieutenant twitched at the pet name, but said nothing.

"It's amazing what memories can do to an old man…" He sighed, in what she deemed as a bit overdramatic.

"What… were you reminiscing about, Captain…?" She wondered if she really wanted to know.

"Oh, nothing… Just a passing thought, really…" He turned around dismissively and Nanao resisted the urge to hit him.

"Captain Kyōraku. As your lieutenant, it is my duty to see to it that you are as… _comfortable_ at your station as much as possible," she explained stiffly_. __And it wasn't nothing the way you were talking about it earlier!_

"Oh Nanao-chan, you're so good to me," he sighed. "Well, if you insist."

The woman resisted the urge to groan.

"It was a long time ago, on an autumn day's not unlike this one…" he began. Nanao hung her head and sat down, reaching over for something to read to pass the time.

"I was a young man then, but already a captain, and by my side I had a beautiful young lady—though nowhere near as radiant as you, Nanao-chan—that I would often spend my free hours with. Ah, the times we shared! The coffee breaks, the chats in the hall, the _dango__…" __(Round, Japanese dumplings usually served on skewers)_

The woman cleared her throat, and the man stumbled to get back on track.

"Anyway, it was a lovely time for us, and before I knew it, our five-year anniversary was upon us! As I was an old-fashioned man, and I pride myself saying that I still am, I decided by myself to get my fair lady a gift as great as she, though, as I said before, she was nowhere near your level of beauty, Nanao-chan."

Nanao flipped a page of a book she was reading. Captain Kyōraku pressed on.

"I was innocently ambling through the halls, you see, trying to find her and present her with this marvelous gift. I wanted it to be a surprise so I hid my reiatsu and used shunpo to get around. And finally, I found her!"

As the story went on, the captain's tone grew more and more dramatic. Again, Nanao turned a page, finding the book much more engaging. She wondered why her captain was speaking in such a strange fashion. Then again, he was always like that.

"But, alas! Fate was cruel to me!" Shunsui stood up abruptly, waving his arms with a flourish. "I found my woman, alright, but also a man! A man with my fair lady! Oh, the heartbreak!" He sat back down, inhaling to calm himself down.

"What happened to the man and the woman?" Nanao asked stoically, trying to make it sound like she cared.

"Oh, nothing. I broke up with her and returned the gift. And we had such a connection…!"

Nanao doubted that but tactfully said nothing. She closed the book she was reading with a sigh.

"Now that you're done with your story, I think it's time you get back to w—"

"OH, NANAO-CHAN!" Captain Kyōraku burst out. The addressed jumped away. "PLEASE, FULFILL AN OLD MAN'S DYING WISH AND MARRY ME!"

_SMACK, CRASH, BANG!_

Within seconds, the captain was on the ground, covered in books and bruises, with an especially large bump on his head.

"THERE ARE TOO MANY THINGS WRONG WITH WHAT YOU'VE SAID SO FAR!" Nanao roared. "ONE, YOU ARE BEING TOO FLAMBOYANT, EVEN FOR YOU! TWO, YOU ARE NOT A DYING MAN! AND THREE! I WOULD SOONER BELIEVE THE MOON WAS MADE OF CHEESE THAN BELIEVE YOU EVER HAD A GIRLFRIEND! GET BACK TO WORK!" Seething, she stomped out the door.

Shunsui gave a lopsided grin. "Ah, the young… They're so cruel these days… But don't worry, Nanao-chan! I'll wait for your inevitable declaration of love for me till the end of time!"

Another book cannoned from the door, smashing into the captain's face, knocking him out.


	29. Alyssum

*****Back again... With an update that's surprisingly quick compared to others of late. I've actually had this chapter done for a _long _time now... But because of a bit of miscommunication, it didn't quite get a chance to get posted close to when I finished... Something I'm actually quite grateful for since looking back on the original, it wasn't quite what I wanted it to be. Before I looked over this with a genuinely critical eye, it was a lot cheesier than this one. I'm pretty happy over this, actually. **

**This chapter, if not taken seriously in the least, can be quite funny and/or amusing. I certainly found it so, even after I went back and tried to take out those parts. Ha!  
**

**Just a note: starting next chapter we'll be getting into more plot-related stuff again. Just wanted to give you a heads-up; I didn't want it to be too sudden or anything. **

**Again, no beta for this one. Her computer is still kind of down, so... Yeah. Any corrections are welcome. And, of course, the actual review of the chapter. Without further ado, I present to you Chapter 29: Alyssum.  
**

* * *

He sat there, immobile for several seconds. His entire body was frozen, and in the dark he could have been mistaken for a stone statue.

_No… She can't have…_

Aria stared at him groggily, her grip on his wrist stronger than ever.

"Captain… What are… you doing…?"

In her sleepy state, her aversion to him had abated a bit, so that the only things left were curiosity and confusion. What was he doing, next to her like that? She had only been sleeping lightly, as she had planned, but something had awoken her. When she came to, the only thing she saw was her captain's back.

_What was he doing… here with me…?_

Tōshirō's entire body tensed and he pried Aria's fingers off his wrist.

"Nothing," he lied. "I'm going to sleep. Good night."

But before he could leave, her hand was back, wound so tightly around his arm that he thought he might lose all feeling in it.

"You were lying there, right next to me," she accused. "I saw you."

Aria grew more and more awake, and with each passing second her timidity bled back into her. But more than anything she only wanted to know what he was doing. She had vague memories of a nightmare, but then it just died out. Next thing she knew her captain was right beside her on the bed.

Her eyes widened. He couldn't have been…

Tōshirō shook his head again. "You were dreaming, Miyamoto," he lied again. "I wasn't there. Go back to sleep."

The boy peeled off her fingers once more and quickly rose off the bed, determined to reach his futon. But in the back of his mind, he wondered if this was really what he wanted.

The sight of him walking away from her… was too much for Aria to bear. She sat up, rubbing her eyes vigorously. Realizing he was getting away, she stepped onto the cold floor, snatching his hand just in time. Tōshirō blinked in surprise.

"I know you want your sleep," Aria mumbled, her voice hoarse from slumber, "but if it isn't too much to ask… Could you stay with me, just for a bit? I know you might not feel very…comfortable about it, but… All I want is to talk."

There was no anger behind her voice; it was nothing more than a single, pleading request.

Aria was not quite aware of the effect she was having on Tōshirō. He stared at her, marveling. Even with her sleepy emerald eyes, there was that persistence he recognized. She looked a little scared, but stood her ground, because she knew it was right.

This one gesture told Tōshirō Hitsugaya that Aria Miyamoto was a much braver person than he would ever be.

With a resigned sigh, he clambered back onto the far end of the end.

"Fine… But I can't guarantee I'll still be here in the morning."

Aria was very happy that he was going to stay, even though her heart had been pounding as she had asked him to stay. She followed him, scrunching up at the very edge of the bed.

"…You have every right to sleep comfortably on this bed, Miyamoto."

"But it's yours."

"If I didn't want you to sleep in it I wouldn't have lent it to you. Now get away from the edge; you'll fall and hit your head."

His voice was so commanding she could do nothing but sigh and comply. She pushed herself away from the edge, moving a little less farther to the boy. But it still wasn't as close as Tōshirō would have approved of.

Of course, even though they weren't really doing anything, neither of them could ignore the awkwardness of this situation. They were alone, in the same bed, in a dark room… Both tried very hard not to think of anything particularly…_embarrassing._

Tōshirō still thought that Aria was a bit too far away for comfort. Her head wasn't even on the pillow, and her back was barely an inch away from the abyss. How was she going to sleep like that? The thought annoyed him.

"Miyamoto, come here," he said rather sharply. He was getting tired of this.

"I'm okay," her muffled voice replied.

"No, you're not. You're not even using the pillow. Come over here before I have to drag you."

"There's not enough room for both of us…"

"So? I'm ordering you to come over here."

Aria muttered something about unfair power plays but still refused to reposition herself. Aggravated, he thought about actually yanking her over himself, but common courtesy and some…_other_ reasons prevented him from doing so. But then, he had the perfect idea.

"Fine," he said. "I don't want to stop you from sleeping, so I'm leaving." He sat up again, but purposely slowed down his movements just to see her reaction.

"Wh-what? No, don't go!" she protested. She reached out for the umpteenth time, fastening onto his arm this time. "Okay, okay, I'll move closer, just don't leave!"

Tōshirō was glad it was so dark, or else there would be no hiding that small, smug smirk on his face. Shifting back into the bed he put himself in a spot where Aria could rest with enough room. Though, he noted, she was right that there wasn't much of it.

Aria observed critically. This bed was honestly too small for the both of them to share next to each other. How could she make them both fit comfortably? Maybe she should be the one to leave, and sleep on the futon herself…

"Don't you even think about sleeping on the floor," her captain warned, seeing the way her eyes darted toward the momentarily forgotten futon.

"Uh, n-no, I wasn't…"

She sighed. She wanted to talk to him, so badly! But familiar insecurity was teasing her, holding her back. Not to mention seeing him like this wasn't helping her thoughts one bit. As usual, Tōshirō wasn't wearing a shirt at all, and he didn't seem shy about hiding that fact either. His arms were tossed behind his head casually, and his eyes were closed. Aria had a very strange urge to touch him.

_What do I do…?_

"If you're not going to go to sleep soon, I'm moving," he declared, eyes closed.

Desperation gripped her once more. "No, please, don't go," she begged. "Can't we just talk a bit? Please…?"

Something in her voice made him open his eyes, and he peered at her curiously. Biting her lip, she looked conflicted and nervous. He greatly wanted to say something besides threats, but…

With a faint sigh, Aria acquiesced, shuffling and then curling into a ball right next to him.

Tōshirō let out a sharp exhale. She was close… Her forehead was touching the skin of his arm and he could feel her breathing. She was trying to get as much pillow room as possible without stealing any from him.

_This…really isn't going to work… _But it would have to do.

The girl was growing restless, since her plan to take a midnight walk hadn't quite worked out. But maybe… talking to her captain would make up for that.

"Captain…?" she called drowsily.

"Hmm?"

"…Was it really you?"

"What?"

"…Were you really the one who made the bad dreams go away…?"

He swallowed, unsure of how to answer. A simple yes or no question—that was all this was. But he had kept it a secret for so long that telling her seemed like breaking a sacred ritual.

Turning his head just a fraction, he found himself looking into her green eyes. Half-lidded, they gazed up at him sleepily, but with that same unwavering straightness that he knew so well. He realized that she had looked him right in the eye every time he had spoken to her, genuine and true. It was rare to meet someone like that. She was patiently waiting for him, calm and quiet. Another look that he couldn't resist.

"Yes," he sighed. "It was me."

"…Why?"

He had been expecting that one, but it still made him jump.

"Because…"

"Because…?"

"…Because I don't like seeing you in pain."

She was quiet, contemplating this response. It seemed a little… contradicting.

"But…If that's true then…"

"Alright. I've had enough. I'm going now."

"What?"

He didn't want to have to explain his reasons to her. He didn't want to have to look like a complete hypocrite in front of her. There was no way he could convey the remorse that he felt for hurting her, and felt cowardly for it. How he could possibly compare to her, this girl who had the courage to stare him straight in the eyes after all he put her through?

"You're almost asleep… So I'm not needed here anymore," he murmured, turning over.

"B-but if you leave, I'll have nightmares again!" she argued.

"I don't think so…"

"Just a little longer, please…" How she wanted him to stay!

Tōshirō winced at her tone but made no move to stop. Aria knew just grabbing his arm wouldn't be enough this time. Frantically her mind tried to come up with a solution. It eventually found one.

Without a second thought, Aria jumped, tackled her captain, hugging him in the process. Shocked, he fell back onto the bed and was even more stunned when he saw Aria's head resting on his chest.

"I don't want you to go," she whispered. "I haven't talked with you for so long, so could you stay for just a little bit longer…?" It was the only she wanted right now. If she had to beg a thousand times for him to comply, she would.

Their close proximity was making both of them flush. Aria's cheek was pressed right up against his well-toned chest, and she was the complete opposite of oblivious. Her arms were wound around his neck, but for some reason… she just couldn't find the motivation to unlatch them.

Tōshirō was not unaware either. With Aria's face on his torso, the top of her head was right beneath his chin. As he breathed, he could detect a faint scent of roses.

What scared him the most was that he didn't want to leave this position either. He tried to ease the tension with some small talk.

"Why… did you… do that…?" he asked, still dumbfounded.

"I want to you to stay with me… And plus, your chest is a lot comfier than the pillow," she replied, trying to add some humor. But in reality, she wasn't lying. She liked being in this position...

Eventually their breathing evened out, but they refused to move. In time though, Aria's arms were growing numb, and she carefully retracted her arms, but would not move away from him.

"You didn't answer me from before."

"What if I don't want to?"

"…Then I guess you don't have to."

He was silent for several moments. Surely, it was fair to give her this? Aria, after all, had every right to this information, because this all revolved around her.

"The first time I saw you having a nightmare was that afternoon after the fire," he started quietly. Aria showed no reaction to this. Tōshirō wondered if this was a good sign, but continued.

"Anyone could tell that you were in pain, Miyamoto… I… didn't want to see you like that… So somehow, I managed to stop it… By the way, you talk in your sleep."

Aria blushed furiously, and Tōshirō could feel it. He smirked, just a bit.

"And then that night, you were dreaming again… And I stopped that one too."

"…Why didn't you tell me?"

"I never found a good time…"

The girl made no response, but she thought back to that first nightmare. She remembered towards the end the cool breeze that had blown past her, extinguishing the flames. Had that been him?

Had he been saving her this whole time?

"I… What…For… how long?"

He was silent for several seconds.

"…Every night."

This hung in the air, impossible to ignore.

"Every…night…" she repeated. It was true; nightmares were hard for her to shake off. And yet…Her captain had gone out of his way just to make sure she was sleeping normally…

"…Except one."

She blinked and for the first time looked up at him. Her eyes widened. Tōshirō looked…pained.

"Can you figure out which one?" he whispered, little more than a breath.

She immediately understood, but she still didn't look away.

This was his chance, and he knew it. He sat up quickly so he could get a good look at her. Something in his expression made Aria sit up as well. She pulled her knees up, tucking them beneath her chin.

"I wish I could explain my actions to you about that night… But the only thing I can say is that I lacked self control… I have no excuse." In the dim lighting, his eyes were gleaming with mysterious intentions.

Aria could only stare at him with wide eyes. Tōshirō looked down her with deep regret etched into his turquoise orbs. She had never seen such emotion in his eyes before.

"Aria Miyamoto," he whispered. "I'm…sorry. For everything. For breaking my promise."

It took quite a while before she could absorb those words.

Tōshirō reached out, placing a tender hand on Aria's head. As he brushed some stray strands of hair aside, she closed her eyes at the familiar gesture. The boy continued to regard her with half-lidded eyes.

"Don't believe a word I said," he muttered. "It was all lies. As you can see, I don't handle stress well…When I said you were a waste of time and space, and how you had no talent…" He shook his head at his foolishness. "Most of all, I do _not_ want you to rot in a ditch…"

He pulled away once he finished that sentence, but he wasn't done.

"And that other day," he continued, shifting uncomfortably. "Forgive me for that… I guess… I was just so mad at myself that I went out of control. Not your fault. All mine. Just forget about it."

Aria's jaw went a bit slack, but she didn't say a thing. Tōshirō fidgeted.

"This is exactly why I don't apologize often," he muttered to himself.

Aria shook her head, trying to gather her scattered wits. It wasn't the fact that her captain was actually apologizing; it was the actual apology itself. Her head was reeling and for a moment she had absolutely no idea what was happening here. He didn't think she was hopeless? Or untalented? It was all just a mistake?

Tōshirō eyed her. "Maybe you should go to sleep…" he suggested.

She shook her head again. Too many things were buzzing around her head at the moment.

But the one that buzzed the loudest… was regret.

She began to empathize with her captain as she recalled those nasty words she shouted at him. She hadn't meant them either; she was just like him, overly frustrated and emotional about this whole ordeal.

"Captain…"

"It's late. Go to sleep."

"I…No, I don't… I just…"

"…What?"

"…I wanted to say that I… I… I'm sorry too, Captain Hitsugaya…"

He blinked. "For what?"

"For… those things I said the other day…"

"…Oh."

She bit her lip. "I don't think you act all high and mighty, Captain… Really… I think you're a very good captain…"

"Miyamoto…?"

"A very good one… _Too_ good…"

His brow furrowed. "What's that supposed to mean?"

Aria hid her face in her knees. "…You're so talented, Captain. Child genius, prodigy, only supposed to appear in the Soul Society once every few centuries…I…I can't possibly keep up…"

Tōshirō gazed at her powerfully. Had this been what she'd been worrying about?

Aria sighed, lying back on the bed. She pulled the covers up to her chin, and she stared straight up, her eyes hard.

"I…don't want to be left behind," she confessed. "I hate being alone, and I want to stay with you, because you're so kind." She gave a hard laugh. "But I guess that's being selfish, isn't it? We all have to move on, sooner or later. I don't have a right to hold you back." But she felt so sad at the thought that she only hid more of her face underneath the blanket. "I guess… The reason I didn't talk to you sooner was because I thought you didn't… need me anymore…" Saying the words out loud made her heart feel hollow.

Her words echoed through his head. _Not need her anymore…?_

"Ridiculous. You worry too much," he responded softly. He couldn't think of a time he would ever not need her for something. Tossing her away would be so cruel and such a waste. Following her example, he moved next to her on the bed, placing his hands behind his head and staring at the ceiling.

Aria closed her eyes briefly. "…I wish I was like you, Captain…"

Tōshirō said nothing but pursed his lips. He tried to imagine Aria, a genius and a prodigy, just like him. Cold and calculating, she looked on with an icy stare that matched his. No warmth at all. He resisted the strong urge to shudder, and for some reason he reached down and grasped the real Aria's hand in his. It was warm to the touch, and it soothed him.

"No," he fervently disagreed. "Not like me."

Aria looked at him, perplexed.

"Why not? I'd be so much easier to deal with that way."

How could he say this? The fact was that he_ liked _Aria. He liked the way she was now, and he didn't want her to change, for anyone or anything. Not for her peers. Not for those people who kept in the choking darkness. Not even him.

"Because… I'm not the most ideal person, nor is my life."

"Why? You have everything…"

Tōshirō thought of a certain lieutenant. "Not true, Miyamoto…"

"Really? I didn't know… You always seemed pretty nice to me."

He sighed. "I'm not perfect, you know," he grumbled. "Don't confuse me with someone who is."

She was silent but pulled his hand closer towards her, stretching the fingers out with both hands. Both her hands felt so feeble in just one of his… She examined the faint calluses, pondering. Her hands were so smooth in comparison, something she took pride in but never really thinking heavily about it. The roughness told a story, a story of her captain's past conflicts. The past conflicts that got him here today.

Her mind briefly flickered to the scars she bore on her back.

Aria looked back at her captain, who was pondering off into space. Something on his shoulder caught her eye. It was hard to see even up close, and she wondered if she was imagining it. But when Tōshirō shifted, it didn't disappear. Squinting her eyes, she discreetly took another look.

To her surprise, it looked like a scar. Circling his left shoulder was a very thin, pale line that seemed to stretch all the way around. Even in better lighting, it would have been difficult, almost impossible to see. It was odd the way it looked, as if it was a perfect suture that sewed his arm in place. Aria felt strangely jealous at how neat and unnoticeable it was compared to the collection she possessed.

"Back to what I was saying before… Miyamoto, to be honest, I…"

She was still staring intently at the scar, a mystery she wanted to solve. At Tōshirō's voice, however, she turned her full attention to him. The full-on look made the captain slightly nervous.

"I think… You're fine the way you are. You don't need to change."

"…What?"

"Foolish girl, you can be stubborn, clumsy, hot-tempered and downright frustrating …"

She blushed. He didn't have to put it so bluntly…

"…But you're also persistent and you work hard for what you want. You're not untalented. You have your skills," he gently touched her splinted hand, "and I have mine. You don't need to change." His eyes softened as he looked back at her.

"Miyamoto, I…see no reason why you should change. No one here hates you. And besides," he took his hand away and ruffled her hair playfully, "you wouldn't be half as fun to deal with if you weren't this way."

Words could not explain how Aria felt then.

Was it really only the faint beginnings of winter? Because she felt like the spring had burst right then and there.

For years, people had always shunned the girl for what she was, without ever knowing who she was as a person. In the end Aria had to resort to putting on a mask, one that could hide her real self and hopefully paint another, better one in its place. She tried very hard to keep it on, but a mask can often blot out the true beauty of the world and weigh down its wearer. She wanted to change, more than anything. She didn't want to be who she was; her greatest wish was to fit in and have a normal life. A life where she didn't have to try so hard to keep something like a mask on.

But here was a person who told her that he was fine with who she was right now.

If she wasn't so sleepy at the moment she might have just gone outside and shouted at the sky. Because that was one less heavy burden on her heart. She didn't have to try so hard anymore.

She sniffed and Tōshirō looked down in alarm.

"Are you crying?" he asked urgently.

"N-no," she lied. She violently rubbed her eyes, erasing tears that hadn't even fallen. Tōshirō gently moved her hand away.

"Alright, I get the point. You don't have to rub your eyes out." He half-smiled then. "What a sap…"

Aria glared at him. "I'm not sappy!"

"You're right. You're cheesy."

"I am not!"

"I'd better be careful, or else tree sap and cheese will start raining from the sky, at this rate…"

"Meanie!"

Tōshirō refrained from chuckling. Aria's eyes were sparked, staring at him with a determined expression.

_That's the Aria Miyamoto I know…_

However, Aria pursed her lips, staring at something on his face. For the moment, the scar was forgotten. Reaching up, she faintly touched his left cheek. He felt like he had stopped breathing at the slight pressure of her fingertips.

"…I didn't mean to slap you so hard… There's still a bit of a scratch…" she fretted remorsefully. She couldn't believe she had actually _done _that. Tōshirō Hitsugaya was a respected captain of the Gotei 13; no one ever hit him like that. No one!

"Oh… It's nothing, really."

"…I'm sorry…" She wondered how he felt after she had slapped him.

"Don't worry about it… Matsumoto would have said I deserved it for being such a heartless bastard." He snorted. If only his lieutenant could see him now…!

On second thought, that didn't seem like such a good idea…

She frowned. "I don't think you're a heartless bastard… I think you're a rather nice one."

"I feel so flattered."

"…Just kidding. You're just nice."

Her lips twitched upwards, she did something unexpected. Reaching out, Aria hugged him the best she could. It was a silent signal, one of forgiveness and gratitude. Tōshirō's mouth opened in surprise, but he let it slide.

They were silent for several moments, watching the clouds cast shadows over the faint moonlight dribbling into the room.

"…Can I ask you a favor?"

"What?"

"…Will you sleep with me tonight?"

Tōshirō tried to hide a violent cough, and Aria's face put all tomatoes to shame.

"I-I didn't mean it that way! I just…wanted you to stay with me… until morning…?"

He looked back at her with an arched eyebrow. "You sure that's all you want?"

Aria punched him.

Trying to muffle soft snickers—along with some soft groans from her punch—he situated himself comfortably on the bed. Aria retracted her arms, only for her to wrap her good hand around his. Deciding it couldn't hurt, he turned his body to the side, so that her forehead might just lean comfortably against his collar bone.

"So… Will you stay?"

"…Maybe."

Aria pouted, but didn't try to persuade him any further.

Tōshirō looked down at her resting form. She looked so…soft and warm; it was hard to believe she would even want to come near him. With the apologies set aside his chest felt light again and he felt almost warm himself.

_Forgiveness really is divine, _he thought sleepily.

Aria was quiet, breathing evenly. He knew she wasn't asleep, but he couldn't help looking at her. Resting up against him, she looked so delicate, a rabbit at the side of a wolf. If he wasn't careful, he might just tear her to shreds…

No. Not a rabbit. He vowed never to do that to her. Perhaps a better term for it would be that she was more of a cub at the foot of an older, more mature wolf. He would guide her, wherever she wanted to go. Teach her until she could stand up on her own.

A sudden fierce bout of protectiveness overwhelmed him. He budged closer to her, tightening the grip on her hand.

_I will protect you… I swear._ This was a promise he vowed never to break.

"Sounds like a plan…" Aria muttered. Tōshirō realized he had spoken aloud and for some reason chuckled quietly.

"Go to sleep, you foolish girl."

"Why do you keep calling me that…?"

"Because it's true."

"You wouldn't like it if I called you a foolish boy…"

"No, I wouldn't, because I'm your captain. Now I'm telling you to go to sleep."

"Not until you promise to stay…"

"I can count to five and you'll be asleep by then."

"…I…guess…"

Within seconds she fell asleep.

The sight of her peaceful form made Tōshirō's eyelids flutter. Leaning into her soft hair, he stared serenely at the ceiling, waiting for sleep to come. He pulled her closer so that she wouldn't get too cold, resting her head on his shoulder. The thought of leaving her did not even occur to him. He was much too comfortable. His fingers reached hers, the ones in the brace. The firm, tough material served as a reminder for him.

_She never hated me in the first place… She just didn't want to be left behind… I wish I had known that sooner, so I could have apologized…_

Something inside him changed. It wasn't something he could detect immediately, but it was there regardless. His apology, something he was so scared to do, had turned out better than he had hoped. Something inside his icy heart was lifted, and for some reason he did not know he felt hopeful. For what, he didn't know at the moment, but somehow a bit of special strength had been infused into him. He tucked it away, wondering what purpose it would serve.

With Aria peacefully folded at his side, Tōshirō's eyes flickered shut, a small and tranquil smile on his lips.

* * *

The sunlight petered in through the thin slit between the curtains, falling onto Aria's closed eyes. With a soft groan, she shielded her eyes in a futile attempt to go back to sleep. Knowing her eyes wouldn't close again, she grumpily shoved her arm aside and tried to get up.

But another arm blocked her path.

Blinking, she looked around, wondering what was going on. Her face swung right in front of her captain's, and she froze, eyes large.

Tōshirō was on his back, his head was leaning limply against the pillow, an appearance of relaxation. Although the smile from last night had been erased—not that she knew anything about that—he had such a restful expression that she didn't need a smile to know he was content. It looked like he had reached for her in the night, since his arm was loosely draped around her. She cocked her head, intrigued.

She recalled the favor she asked of him last night, and then something changed in Aria. Slowly reaching out, she gently pressed her fingers against the skin of his cheek, just above his jaw. With a delighted heart, she couldn't resist the urge to smile. It was a grin that no one had ever seen before on her, not in a long time. The edges of her lips turned up slightly, her white teeth beaming. Her eyes softened and simmered like an emerald pool. She felt as though the sun was shining today just for her.

For the first time in years, Aria Miyamoto smiled genuinely. Not a tiny smirk, not a forced grin, but a real, honest-to-goodness smile. The bolt on her heart unlocked, allowing the bright contents to be revealed for a brief second.

There is only one thought on her mind as she gazed at him.

_You stayed._

**

* * *

**

*****Aha. Well, there you have it. Tōshirō and Aria's long-awaited make-up! You thought I forgot about the nightmare thing, didn't you? HAHA! Nope! With this, I've killed two birds with one stone! I feel very accomplished for having thought of this. Let's have a competition to see who said, "Awww!" the most times while reading this! (Oh, I hope there wasn't TOO much fluff in this...)  
**

**Yes, this chapter could be interpreted in very _interesting_ ways... I was originally going to take all of those parts out, but I thought it was kind of funny, so I left some. Bwahahaha, me and my craziness. **

**I wanted to make a note about the names of the chapters for these four chapters. All of them are names of flowers because of the meanings behind them, at least according to the site I used. I can't cite it here, so it'll be on my profile. Since I love you guys too much I don't want you to have to look these up, so here are the representations of the four flowers I used: **

**_Aconite_ - Misanthropy and Poisonous Words  
_Anemone_ - Refusal and Abandonment; Forsaken  
_Asphodel_ - Languor and Regret  
_Alyssum_ - Worth beyond beauty **

**As for the scar on ****Tōshirō's shoulder... Something I made up, but I'll give you a few guesses on where that came from. Any questions in the reviews, and I'll answer them gladly... **

**_Laissez un commentaire, s'il vous plait! _  
**


	30. The Unknown of Life

*****I'M BACK! Ha, I'm not dead. No, I've just been almost on the other side of the world getting eaten by mosquitoes and melting in humid, hot weather. Oh, and looking at famous historical monuments, teehee. I had internet (albeit it was limited) but I just didn't have the motivation to post this. Eheh, sorry. But I had lots of things to fix anyway. **

**Just another reminder: since this site doesn't like it when I put those streams of asterisks, I have to use the page breaker now. One line means there's a brief time skip and two means there's a POV change. Just needed to remind you so I don't get reviews saying it's confusing. **

**So anyway, it's my birthday today, so I figured I'd treat you guys with this update. Please enjoy and leave a review!  
**

* * *

It felt quite nice to wake up in the morning and know you and someone close to you were on good terms again. Just one less thing to worry about. I could get up in the morning and not feel troubled for once. The phrase "good morning" no longer felt empty. Colors seemed to be brighter than before. I found more reasons to smile, whether they were simple greetings or when someone did me a favor. Either way, it felt wonderful.

Since the busy season was still on (to nobody's pleasure, not even mine) I didn't have a lot of time to speak with my captain. But it was alright, because I'm sure he was watching out for me. Sometimes I would feel his presence whenever I was out, even though I didn't see anyone. I'd think I saw his white hair as I was walking through corridors. One time when I was speaking with someone, Captain was brought up and I though I could sense him nearby.

"Captain Hitsugaya is really nice, looking out for me and all… But I'm just glad that he's not _stalking me in any way,_ you know?" I had said, making the last few words loud enough for him to hear. He seemed a bit sour after I finally saw him, but who knows if he was really there and if those words were the things that ticked him off? He was actually really fun to mess with…

Of course, the others took my happiness in a rather… thunderstruck way. To make a long story short, Sawahata-kun thought it was my physical status as a female that changed my mood, and Rangiku-san thought Captain and I had done some… unmentionable things, though eventually she figured it out (I'm still not sure if she was kidding or not). I thanked my lucky stars every time I thought of how I had a normal friend like Kozue…

My happy mood really paid off. The time came around when my brace had to be removed. Freedom, at last! My arm was just a bit on the crooked side, and Captain Unohana said it probably be like that for the rest of my life. It still worked fine, but I was a bit worried. However Captain assured me that he couldn't really tell unless he stood up close and actually looked really hard. I had been so happy to hear this that I literally threw my arms around him. That got me a lot of teasing from Rangiku, not to mention Captain's face was a bit red and he wouldn't speak to me for a couple of hours. I wonder what I did wrong…

My left arm was a bit clumsy after a long term of nonuse, but since I was so persistent and cheerful about everything for once, I got rid of that soon. Though, out of habit, I used my right hand for a while. It took some getting used to how I would complain about my left arm when I would suddenly realize that it's not in a cast anymore. Being officially ambidextrous had its perks though.

But deep beneath the happiness, a black typhoon of doubt churned within me, and questions I didn't want to answer bubbled to the surface.

How long would this happiness last? Over the years I had gained a useful—and sometimes deterring—habit of second guessing everything around me. I felt genuinely content right now… But there were just some things that kept nagging at me.

I contemplated these things as I sat beneath a bare oak tree. I could already feel a chill in the air, and the few plants that were still coherent didn't like it, nor did I. But winter was the prelude of spring, and if I ever wanted it to come, I would have to bear the cold season out.

That scar on Captain's shoulder… Something about it seemed a bit odd to me. The way it circled his shoulder… It reminded me of the stitches on dolls that kept their limbs attached. He couldn't have lost his arm in the past, could he…? No, impossible! The thought was too gruesome for me to think about, not to mention it was just impossible. No one could regenerate lost limbs.

That matter I pondered upon out of curiosity… But it constantly reminded me of my own wounds.

I touched the back of my neck, and even though it was covered with clothing, I could still somehow feel the start of the largest scar I had. It started around the base of my neck and made a jagged journey down my back. I had several others from past experiences, but I thought about this one the most.

These scars had always been a source of shame for me, being physical remnants of a past I would sooner forget. This was the oldest out of all of them, a display of my personal horrors for all to see. For months after obtaining this one, I had a lot of trouble standing up straight and sitting up without feeling any discomfort or pain. Now it would only occasionally give a twitch, something I could easily ignore. But even if I ignored it, the scars were still there, memories that continued to haunt me.

I wondered how long I would be able to keep my past hidden. I had never really thought about it that way before, but when the idea came it scared me. I never spoke about it before because I didn't feel like it, but thinking about the real thing… How would everyone react if they ever learned the truth about me?

I think I already knew. Horrified, stunned_…__scared_. Then they would keep away, and I would be alone all over again.

My entire being rebelled against feeling that pain again. I knew what I had to do: I had to keep everything a secret. And yet I wasn't sure if I could really lie if anyone ever asked. I had a belief about lies: sooner or later it would come back and haunt you.

But there didn't seem to be anyone who suspected a thing… I'd leave it alone. Perhaps there will come a day that I can finally part with my story… But not today, not now.

_How long do you intend to hold it off?_ My zanpakutō asked skeptically. _I have a feeling you're not going to live up to your promise._

_Hush_, I shushed. _I'll tell them… One day._

_You can't hide it forever… Better to tell them sooner than later._

_No! Not before everything's settled!_

_Foolish girl… That's why you need to tell them, because if you wait until everything is settled, it'll only shake things up and make it harder._

Gritting my teeth, I ignored her. Now she was calling me that? The captain could get away with it all he wanted, but it's another thing completely to be called foolish by the other half of your soul. I wasn't that foolish, was I…?

Shaking off any inhibitions, I touched the bare tree next to me. A few dry leaves fell, and I could feel the last whispers of the tree. It had been summer when I joined the Gotei 13… And look at how much had changed.

Memories from long ago touched my mind, and for once I was not reluctant to see them. They were brief recollections of autumns that had passed at my old home. The streets were normally very dirty and messy, but when the leaves fell they would give Rukongai a much more lively appearance. Children could be seen playing among piles of leaves, laughing, not a care in the world…

I used to play in the leaves too, with someone else. We had so many trees around that we had the most tree piles around, so many that sometimes other children would come and play.

Closing my eyes, I leaned my head onto the tree trunk. That was a peaceful time, as peaceful it could be in a lower Rukongai district. Before any complications, before any jealousy, fights…

An image of a figure with her back to me sent a brief stab of pain through my chest.

_You need to tell someone, before these memories devour you…_

For a second, I wanted to do as Kurobararyu advised. I wanted to run and find someone, tell them all about me, just to get this weight off. Imagine not having that burdensome secret anymore! The thought made me feel lightheaded.

But reality came crashing down on me, and I could guess the consequences. I could already see their faces, twisted in fear and horror. What would they do first, lock me up? Maybe even execute me? I didn't like the sound of being locked in a cell at all; it made me feel like an actual animal. And execution…

I wasn't afraid to die… But I was afraid to die alone.

_Tell them_, Kuro urged.

If only I could, and not suffer any harsh results!

I could feel my sword's scrutinizing glare. _You're not going to tell them at all, are you?_

How could I, with these results bearing down on me? I knew I was being a coward, but… The thought of actually telling them frightened me with an almost primal fear.

Kuro groaned. _I regret mentioning this to you._

I could feel her slip away, frustrated at my stubbornness.

_This isn't over._

I wasn't expecting it to be, but I hoped.

_In your dreams, Aria… I'll make you see sense…_

With that, she disappeared, leaving me with a slight headache. I groaned.

"Something tells me things are going to get a bit crazy…"

* * *

"Errands…?"

"That's right!"

Rangiku-san was being her usual peppy self, since this matter between the captain and I had been settled. Thank goodness she still wasn't going about that embarrassing business from before…

"Are you making her do your other chores too, Matsumoto?" Captain deadpanned as he was sorting papers. Sweat ran down the lieutenant's head.

"Uh, I don't know what you're talking about, Captain!"

"Hopefully if Miyamoto does your errands you can finally get some of your _own_ work here done for a change…"

"I do my own work! See, look there!"

"Those aren't yours; Miyamoto did them, damn it!"

I held my hands out in an attempt to calm things down, to no avail.

_One day when my back is turned they're going to eat each other alive…_

But like always, things settled by themselves, and all that was left was a twitching boy and a sheepish lieutenant.

"Get out," he ordered sharply, shaking his head.

"But Ca—"

_"Out."_

Rangiku-san drooped her head like a sad dog—though I think she only did that for effect—and walked out. Thinking it'd be wise to let Captain Hitsugaya cool down, I began to sidle out as well.

"No, wait, Miyamoto."

I paused during my not-so-stealthy trek to the door, looking at him.

"Yes sir?"

"Stay for a bit. I want to talk with you."

"Um, sure." I closed the door and marched up to him. "Do you want me to get you something in Rukongai too…?"

He snorted. "No, I do my own errands, unlike some people here." There was no doubt in my mind who he was talking about.

"So, uh, what did you want to speak to me about?"

"Just some notices… I just got the news today."

Something in his face changed, as if he had shifted back into the stone mask I sometimes saw him wear around others. I stepped back, wondering what had happened.

"Captain Hitsugaya…?"

"As of today," he started quietly, "you no longer share a room with me, Miyamoto. Your room is finished."

"…I beg your pardon?"

"Your room. It's fixed." Captain ran a hand around his neck, his eyes downcast. "You won't have to share a room with me anymore…"

It took me several seconds for me to process this, and as soon as I did, my shoulders slumped.

Was it wrong for me to say that I liked bunking with him? His presence gave me solace against the constant danger of nightmares. His company kept me from solitude. I didn't want to go.

It took me a few more seconds to realize that he was making faces because he didn't want me to go either. I could tell how hard he was trying to hide it, and I could understand. I'm absolutely positive there are people out there who would take this entirely the wrong way…

"Oh… Okay." I had nothing else to say. It wasn't like I could protest.

"Will you be alright?" he asked abruptly.

I blinked. "Alright? For what?"

Captain turned around, trying to look like he was doing something. "Alright… You know, from the dreams…"

I stared at him for so long that he shifted uncomfortably. Even with my best efforts, I couldn't stop the small smile at his concern.

"I'll be okay," I replied, touched.

"…Are you sure…?"

I scuffed my foot against the floor. "I get nightmares when I'm alone… Just knowing that you're concerned and thinking about me somewhere else doesn't make me feel so. So yes, I'll be alright. Thanks for your concern, Captain, but you don't have to worry about me." I gave him a reassuring grin, and I think he blushed a tiny bit.

"If you're sure…"

I had to stop myself from asking him if I could go to him if I ever did have nightmares, just in case. Something like that would have sounded a little awkward. But I was fairly sure that I was going to be fine. Comforted by the latest events, I think I can still savor my dreamless slumber for a bit longer.

"Was there anything else you needed?"

"Yes… Because of your recovery," his eyes glimpsed my left arm, "Captain Unohana is requesting your presence."

"C-Captain Unohana?" Well, I definitely wasn't expecting this…

"_After your apparent… attack from the Arrancar, she asked that you take kendo lessons from her every now and then." Captain Hitsugaya shrugged. "I'd do it, if I were you. Captain Unohana is known for her kendo skills." _

"But… Why me?"

"I guess she finds you interesting."

I turned red and tried to hide it. It was useless against him, but he carefully averted his eyes with an amused expression. His statement, however, made me want to ask a funny question.

"Captain?"

"What?"

"I was just thinking… Since Captain Unohana thinks I'm interesting, as you put it… I wonder if _you _think the same."

Captain Hitsugaya jumped at the question, and I hid my smile behind a hand. He seemed genuinely flustered at this and tried to hide it, like me.

"Uh…"

I bit my lip to hide the growing grin. Scowling, he leaned back on the desk, and I couldn't help but admire him.

_Aria's got a crush on her captain… _Kuro teased.

_No I don't…_

_Then… Why are you looking at him like that?_

_Because he's just cool like that._ "Cool" was definitely a term to describe him…

_That doesn't explain it._

_Oh really? Just like how it doesn't explain how sometimes I find you thinking about Hyōrinmaru and you say it's because he's "cool"?_

_…Touché._

Captain Hitsugaya cleared his throat, ignoring my question.

"Anyway… Take the lessons, will you? It'll help."

"Help?"

"Kendo can be incredibly useful… Just ask Zaraki."

The image of the berserk captain swinging that serrated blade around terrified me.

"Okay… I'll take the lessons…"

"Good. It'll ease my mind a bit."

"What? Why?"

"This way I don't have to come swooping in to your rescue as often… Seeing as how you can hardly do a thing by yourself." He smirked as I flared and spluttered with indignity.

"Whatever. You should get going and run Matsumoto's errands now."

"Do you want me to get you anything?"

"…Uh, no, I'm good."

"Are you sure? I could—Hey, what's that?"

There was a package on the desk that hadn't been there yesterday. It was a small box, and it smelled faintly sweet. Captain Hitsugaya hastily pushed it aside.

"Nothing," he said.

"Is that candy?"

"No!"

"Then what is it? It smells sweet."

He look sheepish as he ran a hand through his hair. "My grandmother just sent this in… It's amenatto…"

"Ew… Fermented beans?"

"Shut up…"

So Captain's grandmother set him things like this, huh? That was nice… But what really surprised was the mix of desire and resentment I felt towards him about having relatives who thought about him enough to send him gifts.

_Jealousy_, Kuro and I identified morosely.

"I'll just be going then," I announced, trying to hide the gruffness in my voice.

"…Are you alright?"

"I'm fine." Please, please don't let him hear the snappiness!

Not exactly convinced, Captain slid into his seat, arms crossed.

"Before you go... A word of advice."

"Yes?"

"Be sure to take your zanpakutō with you."

I looked down at my katana. I always carried it around with me, indoors and out, so why would he tell me now?

"Uh… Sure… But I always carry it around anyway…"

"I know."

"Then why…?"

He pushed aside some papers. "There's been some trouble in Rukongai lately," he muttered in a low tone.

Startled, I asked, "Trouble? What kind?"

"It's nothing big, nothing you should worry too much about. Just be on the lookout for anyone suspicious."

"But I'm going into the first district, aren't I?"

"True, but I'm just telling you to be careful. Where are Kozue Iwahara and Sawahata?"

Strange of him to ask, especially about Sawahata-kun. "Uh, I think Kozue had to help another division with something, and Sawahata-kun is already in Rukongai doing something…"

He frowned, tapping the desk. After a few seconds, he shrugged. "Fine, I was just thinking it'd be better if you had someone to go with. Get going; Matsumoto doesn't like to wait."

The captain's words made me feel a little uneasy. "Um, okay… I'll just be going then. I'll be back before sundown."

"Go."

I nodded, pushing aside the door. But even as I walked away, I could still feel his troubled stare behind me.

* * *

Rukongai hasn't changed much… Then again, how would I know? I'd never been in this district before.

The buildings looked relatively the same… The same kind of people bustling about… It just looked a lot neater.

I'd never been in the higher districts of Rukongai before. It was harder to cover my tracks that way, since they were so close to the Seireitei, where the security was tighter… People like me who cause destruction everywhere they go shouldn't be caught near these places if they want to continue seeing the light of day.

It was peaceful… I could even see other Soul Reapers walking about, looking at shops' wares. No one looked at me strangely, although I think I heard some children marveling at the color of my hair. I wonder what it would look like it I dyed it?

But I still couldn't stop that cold, hard fear climbing up my throat and sealing it shut.

Over the years I had gained a paranoid mistrust of Rukongai, no matter which district it was. Maybe it would have been better to come with another person, like Captain Hitsugaya had suggested. But terror had unsettlingly descended upon me, and I couldn't help but tighten the grip on Kurobararyu. Feeling my fear, she didn't even try to soothe me.

In a fog I went around, doing the errands Rangiku-san had asked me to do. Most of it consisted of buying stuff, which was easy enough. By the time I was done, I had several bags draped over my arm, and eager to get home.

The sun was setting though, and I was walking quicker than I would have normally. The idea of staying in this place when it was dark didn't appeal to me one bit. Already there was some people closing shop, although others were beginning to open, mostly places like bars. Idly I wondered if my lieutenant went to any of these…

In my haste, however, I wasn't nearly as careful as I should have been, and all of a sudden I tripped (was there any surprise there?) into the dust.

"Ow…" I groaned. "You'd think I'd stop doing that after all this time… I hope Rangiku-san's things are okay…"

After I made sure all of my baggage was fine, I was about to make my way back home when something I caught something out of the corner of my eye. It was a shock of blond hair and a tall figure, just disappearing behind a corner.

"Sawahata-kun…?" At least it looked like him. I wasn't sure; there were probably lots of blondes in the Soul Society. In any case, I decided to check, just so I could say hi.

As carefully as I could, I staggered after the vanishing figure. It was fast; one moment I'd think I'd have him, and the next he was around the corner again. At this point I was fairly sure it was him; he walked the same and the stature looked about right.

"Sawahata-kun!" I called. I prayed I was right so that I wouldn't embarrass myself…

I thought I saw his head turn in surprise, but then he made another sharp turn, surprising me so much that I nearly slipped.

"Slow _down_, will you…?" I growled.

Dusting myself off, I tried to locate him again, but this time I had lost him for sure. I groaned in disappointment and was about to go back home when I realized I had no idea where I was.

"Ah, bloody thorns…" I cursed. When I saw Sawahata-kun again, I would pull a Kozue on him and kick him hard. Either that, or I could just tell her myself and see what would happen.

As I was busy thinking up good ways to get back at the boy, some children were playing nearby. From the way they dressed it looked like I was still in the higher districts. Unable to resist I watched them, sitting down to create the illusion that I was just resting.

They appeared in separate groups, off playing whatever came to mind. Some were playing tops while others were just playing tag. I felt a sort of solace watching them, and I leaned forward on my hands.

There was a group of five nearby; three boys, two girls. They were huddled together, crouching on the ground. They were murmuring excitedly among themselves.

"Can you do it too?"

"Sort of, but not as well as you can!"

"What? What's going on?"

"Here, here, I wanna show you something!"

"What, what?"

"So cool!"

I couldn't help but smile. Okay, maybe I did have a soft spot for children. I couldn't help it; seeing them happy made me happy, because they were so innocent with no troubles.

And perhaps there was a void inside my heart that longed for that same feeling, for something lost a long time ago…

"Okay, okay, watch this!"

One of the girls held up her hands and made a concentrated expression. I watched with the other children with a hunch in mind.

In her palms, something flickered. A few pinpricks flashed at first, and the children surrounding her leaned forward.

"Don't get so close, guys! Who knows what'll happen?"

Reluctantly, they drew back, but their eyes were widely drawn to her hands. Her face scrunched up again, and with much effort, an orb of light materialized in her hands.

The children oohed and aahed. Feeling proud of herself, the girl showed off a little, pushing the orb around so they all could see. They jumped back, startled, but eventually came for a closer look, enthralled by this strange new sight.

I couldn't help myself and clapped very quietly. I remember my sister had exhibited these signs early on… I remember begging her over and over again to make the orb again, because it was so new and amazing.

My powers, on the other hand, revealed themselves in a rather abrupt manner…

"So cool!" one of the boys said.

"Does this mean you'll be a Soul Reaper one day?" It was the other girl who said this.

"I guess so." The girl with the glowing orb shrugged.

"That's so cool! I think I have an uncle who's a Soul Reaper!"

"But the Hollows are so scary!"

"Maybe one day you can be a captain! They're so cool and powerful and stuff!" A boy made a punching gesture.

"And they swing these cool swords around!" Another boy swung an invisible sword, killing some kind of imaginary foe.

"Oh, I don't know… Maybe I'll go to the Academy sometime." The girl with the spiritual powers contemplated her glowing orb.

"Why don't we ask that Soul Reaper sitting right there?" A boy pointed over in my direction, I sat up, startled.

"Yeah, yeah, let's go ask her!"

All of a sudden, there was a small crowd of children around me, and I nervously glanced around.

"Hey, nee-san, what's it like being a Soul Reaper?"

"Yeah, yeah, are you a lieutenant? A captain?"

"Are Hollows really scary?"

"A zanpakutō? Cool! Can I hold it?"

They were eagerly clutching my clothes, asking questions so fast I could barely think.

"Do you think I have a shot?" the girl with the spiritual powers quietly posed.

"Okay, you guys, one at a time," I soothed. As soon as they quieted, I frantically tried to come up with some answers.

"Being a Soul Reaper is fun, but you have to listen to your captain and stay on your toes all the time and treat everyone nicely. No, I'm not a lieutenant or a captain. Hollows are alright; it's just the big ones that can be scary. They're alright though; you won't get hurt unless you're seriously afraid of them. And, yes, I think you have a fair chance at the Academy." I gave a small smile to the girl, and she beamed.

_Yes, you have a very good chance. You don't have out of control powers that wreak havoc…_

"So what do you do in the Seireitei?"

"Well, I—"

I was suddenly interrupted by a distant scream, and my head turned sharply. The children, frightened by the outburst, huddled around me.

It was probably nothing, maybe some children playing or something. But the scream… It didn't sound like it came from a child. It was full of surprise and anguish, as if someone had just had something precious to them torn away…

"Stop! Give him back!"

Out from the dust, a lone woman was running, screaming at another figure in front of her. It was a person hidden beneath the folds of a long, dark cloak. Under its arm was a child, crying and whimpering for its mother. The latter was crying as well, as she began to lag behind the person.

"Please, someone stop him! Bring back my baby!"

She could run no further, and collapsed to the ground in tears. Meanwhile, the figure turned a corner, and the abducted child's cries could still be heard.

Someone whimpered beneath me, and I pushed the children aside.

"Okay, I want you guys to go inside, okay?" I ordered urgently. "Go back home and stay there, alright?"

"Are you going to go after that bad man?"

"Yes, I am, now go!"

They scampered off, and I tightened Kuro to my sash.

_What do you think this is?_ Her tone was slightly worried. _Kidnappings don't normally happen in this area of Rukongai…_

_I don't know… This can't possibly have anything to do with the captain's warnings, could they…?_

Either way, I had to save that little boy.

After I carefully hid the bags I was carrying, I took off, following traces of the cloaked figure's reiatsu. Frankly, I was surprised he or she had any of it at all. I thought this sort of thing was only done by regular souls. Did that mean it was a Soul Reaper?

The cloaked person was clever, maneuvering through narrow alleys and slits throughout that district. Several times I nearly tripped, and I'm glad I caught myself in time, because if I had fallen I would have lost precious time and distance.

Eventually the paths became more and more restricted, so much so that the figure was having trouble getting through them. I smiled tightly, grateful for my small size, and tried my best to run quicker. The child's cries were steadily getting louder and louder and I hurried.

I could tell we hit a dead end from the way his reiatsu stopped moving. Carefully hiding behind a corner, I drew my zanpakutō, expecting the worst.

The little boy gave a tearful moan, and the cloaked person forcefully stifled it. I felt a rush of anger at the roughness, and briskly stepped out.

"I have you now," I growled.

The person whipped around at the sound of my voice. Under the mantle I could see the hilt of a sword and I went into a defensive stance.

"Let the boy go, and I'll let you go as well." I wanted to end this with the least amount of bloodshed as possible.

The child, aware that I was there to rescue him, began to thrash around in the person's arms, and he struggled to maintain his grip on the child as well as keeping an eye on me. I took one step forward; he took one step back.

All of a sudden, he extracted his weapon, lunging and swinging at me with incredible speed. Inhaling sharply in surprise, I jumped away, falling over in the process. Incensed, I pointed my sword at him.

"Flare your bloodthirsty thorns, Kurobararyu!"

Roots erupted from the ground around the person's feet and binding his ankles. He seemed surprised at this, jumping so much that he himself fell to the ground, the child still in tow.

I rushed forward and hurled my zanpakutō at him. He blocked the blow and forced me back. I kept my eye on the child, in case the cloaked person would make a move, but at the moment he concentrated on cutting the bondages around his feet.

I summoned more roots, tying his arm down as well. Unable to use his weapon it would be easy to take back the child. I stepped forward, eager yet cautious.

The small boy gave another cry and flailed. In turn his kidnapper tightened his arm rather sharply, squeezing him so tightly that he lost his breath. I stopped, frightened that he might have been hurt.

This gave the kidnapper enough time to fight his way free of my plants. Springing up, he ferociously thrust his sword at me. I dodged just in time, but the blade grazed my cheek and I felt warm blood dripping down my face. The person promptly ran off into a small corner that I hadn't seen before. I cursed, ignoring the scratch on my face and giving chase.

Again I followed his reiatsu, but the child's cries had strangely ceased. I panicked, wondering if this was a bad sign. He couldn't have done anything to him, could he?

It frustrated me how in this constricted place that I couldn't use any of my stronger attacks. The last thing I wanted was to draw attention, and destroying the buildings here was not the way to go. I tried to create a wall of vines to stop him, but he only turned another corner. It felt somewhat ironic how I was chasing someone through these winding passages that I had myself used to escape from attackers as a child.

Thankfully, we soon emerged from the place into a more open area, with trees and few houses. There were not that many people about, and even they moved out of the way as we sped past them. Twirling Kurobararyu, I shifted her and carefully aimed at the person's back.

_Please don't make a mess…_

At my call, purple flames blasted from the tip of my zanpakutō, hurling at the kidnapper and knocking him to the ground. I heard him give a cry as the flames singed his clothing and summoned my plants again. This time I had them make a full body wrap instead of just his legs, now that we were in open space. I peered at the child and was relieved that he wasn't hurt, but his mouth was gagged and he looked horribly frightened.

"I'll only say this one more time," I huffed, pointing the sharp bud at the person's neck. His flailing stopped, and under the cape I could feel his gaze.

"Put the boy down, and you walk free. I won't chase you, I won't cut you, I won't even take your cloak. Just let him go."

At first I thought I had won, and that he would immediately release the boy, but I was soon mistaken.

"It's funny, how you spent so much time helping a stranger," the cloaked figure suddenly remarked. I started, not expecting him to speak. But I didn't respond, and only held Kuro closer to his neck.

"So you're going to cut my neck if I don't let him go? Just what I expected from a monster."

My heart gave a horrible lurch and my eyes widened.

"Then again, why should it matter? You've already killed so many; one more life on your hands probably won't matter anyway. How much blood have you shed now?"

My throat had mysteriously sealed itself shut and I did nothing. Even though I couldn't see the face, I could feel the malicious smirk.

"Do you enjoy it, mindless slaughter? I'm willing to believe that you relish every kill, because then you won't be hurt anymore, will you? You love to hurt the people who hurt you first."

My heart, even with its hummingbird beating, could not drown out his words. Who was this man, and how did he know about what I had done? His words, like poison, permeated my mind and soon my body, making me unable to move.

"Why should you help this boy?" He hefted the gagged child in his arms. "He's a stranger, someone you don't know a thing about. Why should you help him when no one ever came to your aid?"

Thoughts that I thought were gone, thoughts that were buried within the deepest depths of my soul began to surface.

_That's right… No one ever came to help me._

I could see them now, blank faces with eyes full of fear. Many simply backed away from me, but some rushed forward with glinting weapons…

"How do you know this child would not be like all the rest? If he ever saw what you could do, he might run, like the others. Tell people about you, create a mob to hunt you down. Everything you do always seems to backfire, doesn't it?"

In a corner of my mind, I could hear Kuro shouting at me, telling me to defeat the man once and for all. But it was as though his words themselves froze my body, along with bringing up the thoughts that I hated to think, but still did anyway.

"I wonder why that is…" His tone became pondering. "Nothing you do goes right… You're probably hardly holding up right now. Even with good intentions people around you still get hurt… Who's to say that you won't kill the people who help you again?"

That question beckoned forth a dark, sinister memory to mind, and in a fit of rage I slashed at him. He moved enough not to get hit, but was smart enough that the scepter cut off the plants holding him in place, prancing away. I winced at the cries of pain of the fallen plants.

"See? It happens all the time. The ones who help you just keep getting hurt, over and over. Can't you do anything right?"

I gave another cry and slashed at him again. The man jumped back, sword drawn but seemed unconcerned.

"Hmm, there's a word that's used to describe you… Ah, yes. Broken. You're broken. You never do what you're supposed to and instead you do it all wrong. That's what broken is. And you know what everyone does with broken things… No one wants them; eventually they all get thrown away…"

_Broken._

Was that what I was? Someone who broke and couldn't do their job? Was there really something wrong with me? That would explain a lot…

But right now, I was so distraught that I couldn't stop attacking him. Before I knew it, I had activated my Youkou Oshaku and launched waves of purples flames, just to hit him. Swing, slash, cut, that was all I was thinking about. I didn't care, just as long as I got rid of that tormenting voice.

Speaking of that voice, why did I have a faint feeling that I had heard it before? The way it curled and infected my mind kept me from completely identifying it, but it just sounded familiar…

I keeled over, panting from my futile efforts to hurt him. He stood feet away, arm still around the child he abducted, unscathed.

"How much training do you think it will take for you to finally do something right?" His tone for the most part was inflectionless, but there was a hint of a malicious undertone.

"You don't know anything about me," I snarled. He didn't. He didn't understand one thing about me.

"Are you sure? How can you be sure that I don't know that as a child, you were usually the one left to watch the house? How do you know that I never knew that you tended to a garden in your spare time? How a while ago you were attacked by an Arrancar and discovered a new power in your zanpakutō? How you have an aptitude for work involving your hands? That you have constant nightmares and night terrors that have haunted you for about a decade? That you had a sister named Hotaru, and you had kissed the ground she walked on?"

I was speechless, my anger forgotten. This man, who had appeared so suddenly, knew all this. What was happening here?

Dusk was descending quickly, and we both were aware of this. However, while I refused to return until I finished this, he seemed to want to hurry away. I summoned a ring of plants around us so that he wouldn't escape. Now, the child wasn't my only priority. I wanted answers.

"So you really intend to kill me…?" he pondered.

"Only unless you give me some answers as to how you know so much," I seethed. The flames blazing around Kuro flared briefly.

For the moment we were at a bit of a standstill. I was busy trying to plan out an attack while he was trying to plan out an escape. Why he didn't want to fight me when I had seen how easily he blocked my attacks was unknown to me, but it would be easier for me to beat him that way.

The moment we were about to make our moves, however, I heard a rustle nearby. Both of our heads turned, and outside my ring of vines a little girl emerged. There was a large, bright orb floating above her palms, lighting the way, and I recognized her as the girl from the group of children.

"N-n-nee-san…" she whispered, appearing to be concerned. Part of me was impressed and touched at her bravery and worry, but most of me was horrorstruck.

"What are you doing?" I exclaimed. "Get away from here!"

Frightened at my outburst, she stopped walking but didn't back away either. Much to my displeasure the man in the cloak appeared to be looking at her intently.

"It's too bad I can't take both," he was muttering to himself. "But this one should suffice."

"What are you mumbling about?"

"As much as I would have loved to continue this standoff it's getting late. I don't know about you, but I have somewhat of a curfew."

"You're not going anywhere!"

I charged, swinging my weapon behind me. This time, I would finish it.

"Oh really!"

In a flash, he held the boy up, his blade pressed against the child's neck. He screamed, a sound that chilled me to the bone and forced me to stop. Gritting my teeth, I stared him down, unable to move unless he released the boy. The cloaked man laughed.

"You really are soft despite what's happened to you, aren't you? I would have thought you had more anger and hatred after all that!"

I felt it was appropriate to give him the angriest scowl I could muster. He laughed again.

"I think I'll take my leave… We'll meet again, Aria Miyamoto…"

Much to my great surprise, he suddenly dropped the boy and ran for it. I started to give chase, but realized that the boy was a much bigger priority.

But right when I was about to reach him, I saw the man run towards the little girl and snatch her up instead. She screamed, her bright orb going out. I, too, gave a cry and started after him again. But this time instead of immediately fleeing like before, I heard him mutter a few words and point at me. An explosive force collided with my chest, and I gasped as I was flung back into the dirt. My torso ached, and I could barely get up as the man ran away.

"No!" I rasped. But it was too late. They vanished into the darkness, and I couldn't even hear the girl's cries anymore.

* * *

"My baby!"

The mother rushed forward, embracing the little boy that rushed towards her.

"Mama!"

I stood by silently, watching this ritual of tears and kisses. All this was unknown to me; I'm not sure I've worried someone this much before. Or if anyone ever really worried about me.

The woman hoisted the child up, and I took this chance to approach her.

"Excuse me, ma'am," I called quietly.

"Oh! You're the splendid girl who saved my child, aren't you?"

The word "splendid" made me smile a bit. "Yeah…"

"Oh, thank you so much for saving him! I don't know what I would do without my boy. Isn't that right, Taka?" She tickled her child before turning back to me.

"Eheh, I was just doing my job…"

"You must be so brave to go after him! You even got a nasty cut on your face, you poor thing!"

I suddenly remembered the gash on my face and winced at how it stung.

"No, it's fine… I was just going to ask you some questions."

"Alright, but I'm not sure I can be of much help. He just appeared out of nowhere!"

"Do you know why he took your son?"

"Not really. We were only outside, and I was watching Taka playing. I was quite surprised when he started making these glowing orbs from his hands, but I probably shouldn't be since his father is a Soul Reaper, after all…"

I blinked. "He has spiritual powers too?"

"Yes, but they just appeared and nothing really to brag about. I think I saw a girl who made an enormous orb when I was chasing the man down. Right when Taka showed me an orb, that man just all of a sudden ran over and snatched him right out of my arms! Oh, I'm so glad he's back!" She went back to cooing at the little boy.

My brow furrowed as I pondered this. The man appears when the boy began showing signs of spiritual powers… Only to abandon him for the little girl whose powers were still premature yet more developed. I suddenly realized what he meant when he said how it was too bad he couldn't take both.

"Thanks for your help, ma'am," I said.

"Oh, my pleasure, dear! And again, thank you so much! I'm going to be a lot more careful from now on, what with the rumors going around…"

"What rumors?"

"There have been some reports that other children with spiritual powers are being taken as well, but I only assumed they were stories and even if they weren't it was probably just some nasty business in the lower districts. But today I guess I was wrong."

I blinked again, finally beginning to understand what was going on. Was this what the captain was warning me about?

I waved at the two as I left, pondering this new turn of affairs. Why were children with spiritual powers being kidnapped? I went over to a small corner where I had stashed Rangiku-san's things before running after the cloaked man.

"Aria?"

The familiar voice made me turn, and I saw Sawahata-kun eyeing me. His eyes lingered on the scratch on my face that was still bleeding.

"What happened? You look like you just got into a fight!"

"That's because I _did_." I tried to wipe the blood on my cheek only to stop when Sawahata-kun handed me a small towel.

"A fight? With who? That scratch is too clean for it to be anything except from a sword…"

"I don't know. You were there, you tell me." Apparently I was still mad at him about the whole leaving-me-behind thing.

Startled, he looked up. "What? What are you talking about?"

"You know just what I'm talking about. I saw you when I was walking down the street but you just ran a whole bunch of corners. I tried to catch up with you but either you were ignoring me or you couldn't hear me, and I'm more inclined to believe the former. Geez, do you know how many times I nearly tripped trying to catch up with you?"

"H-how are you so sure it was me?" he stammered.

"The height, the blond hair, the black kimono… Not to mention you actually _looked _at me when I called your name. Ugh, wait until I tell Kozue about this…"

He suddenly paled. "You wouldn't."

"Oh yes I will."

"Not unless I stop you."

"I'll have to see Kozue eventually, Sawahata-kun. Are you going to stop me every time? She'll be wondering why I'm not seeing her and guess who's going to be the first person she's going to ask about it."

Having realized there was no way to win, my friend sighed in defeat, making a swift gesture of mercy. I continued to dab at my scratch.

"You have the weirdest timing, Sawahata-kun…"

"What?"

"You always appear and disappear at the weirdest times… I mean, in the world of the living you left right before the Arrancar showed up, and now you appear and disappear right before that guy comes and then come out again when he disappears. Are you psychic of something?"

He was silent as we walked until he said, "I guess you're right."

"Sawahata-kun? Do you know what's been going on?"

"About what?"

"About this whole trouble in Rukongai thing. The captain made a hint about it before I got out here."

He frowned. "Of course he did," he mumbled.

"What?"

"Oh, uh, yeah. It's fairly new, which is probably why you haven't heard about it yet. Apparently there have been some kids who've been disappearing lately. It doesn't really matter what district they're in; 80th, 26th, even some of the higher districts. The only thing they have in common is that they all have some trace of spiritual power. No one really knows what to make of it."

"Is that all?"

"…No."

"What else?"

"…There've been some students from the Soul Reaper Academy disappearing as well…"

I was so surprised to hear this that I stopped walking for a moment.

"…What…?"

Sawahata-kun's expression was grave. "From the rumors I've heard, it's just the newer students, like the first and second years. A group of them went home for vacation one time but they never went back. Their families said they never even got home. Ever since then they've just been disappearing every now and then. Right now they're too scared to even come out of their dorms."

"That's weird…"

"Yeah… Don't get freaked out though; the older students aren't being targeted at all and I doubt any Soul Reapers will be either."

"Hmm."

What a strange situation this was. First people with early signs of power disappear, then this guy in a cloak begins telling me all sorts of things I never expected anyone to really know. Why did I have a feeling I was connected with this?

"Here, help me with these." I handed some of the bags I had to Sawahata-kun, who took them with a confused expression. He peered into one of the bags.

"Why did you get a G-cup sized bra? Whoa, this thing is huge." He pulled out a large undergarment from the bag, gawking at it. I gasped in horror.

"Hey! Give that back! It's not mine!"

"Well obviously, seeing as how you—"

"Don't even _think_ about saying it, Sawahata-kun!"

He laughed as he held the garment above my head, where I couldn't reach it.

"The captain would get a kick outta this, I bet! How do you think he would react if I shot this into his face?" Sawahata-kun began running off with it, and I gave madly gave chase.

"Maybe in a few decades you'll be wearing one of these, eh, Aria?"

"Sh-shut up!"

I'd ask Captain Hitsugaya about this later… But for now, these mysterious circumstances were all I could think about, along with the little girl who had been taken away… And about how I was going to word my revenge to Kozue when I get back.

**

* * *

***Gosh, this is long... I blame all the dialogue I put it. I'm trying to put in more of that while limiting my other writing. I'm not sure it's going well. **

**So! The plot thickens! Will Aria ever reveal her past? Will her captain ever figure out why he's blushing so much? Who is this mysterious, cloaked man who seems to be stalking our heroine? And will Takumi ever figure out a way to survive an encounter with Kozue? Tune in for my next update! **

**Aw, who am I kidding? I don't even know what I'm going to _do _for the next chapter. I know the chapter after that... Oh great. **

**Cloaked Man: I am not a stalker!  
Me: Then you're a pedophile!  
Cloaked Man: I'M NOT THAT EITHER!  
Me: So you're both?  
Cloaked Man: UGH! **


	31. Favor Imposed

*****(11/4/10) I LIVE! YES! I'M STILL ALIVE! HAHA! **

**Ah, so sorry for my two, three month long absence, dearest readers. I know I shouldn't be making up excuses, but one, I had a huge brainfart that lasted several weeks regarding this chapter, and two, I've been really busy with a sport I recently joined. You should all join a local swim club or something; IT'S FUN! **

**Okay, since swim season is over (very sad...I actually have some muscles for once in my life...) I might have more time to type up more chapters, but don't expect them too frequently like before. **

**I have one more excuse for my absence: I'm addicted to something called Vocaloid... **

**Disclaimer: I OWN NOTHING BUT THIS STORY, THE ORIGINAL CHARACTERS AND A REPLICA LIGHTSABER. Everything else belongs to esteemed Kubo-sensei.  
**

* * *

"What? You were attacked?"

Captain Hitsugaya was pacing in front of me, continually glancing at the bandage on my face.

"Well… Not really. I just went after him is all…"

His turquoise eyes narrowed. "That was an unnecessary risk, Miyamoto. You could have been killed."

"So you expect me to have left the kid all alone?"

He pursed his lips. "No, but you could have taken some precautions first."

I sighed; there was no hope in trying to convince him.

When I had returned late last night, Captain Hitsugaya was apparently out, so I just went to sleep after I asked Hanatarō to take care of my face. Next morning I got up, went to his office and explained why I was so late. I had already delivered Rangiku's goods to her the previous night, but I wasn't sure if she had told him. Judging from his reaction, it looks like she didn't.

"You stay out all night when you promised to come back by sundown. You stay out so late that I had to go look for you myself." His tone had lowered down to a humanly growl, but I wasn't intimidated.

Surprised at what he said, I looked up. "That was why you were gone?"

He scowled. "Why else would I be gone in the middle of the night?"

"So… Rangiku-san didn't say anything to you?"

Captain paused and then cursed in a low tone. I now knew who he was blaming for my little escapade.

"I saw her before I left but she was gone when I came back. And obviously she doesn't get up this early in the morning." He muttered a few profanities under his breath before pacing a bit more.

"Oh."

I had nothing else to say. Personally I was surprised he went through all that trouble.

"You're going to go to Unohana's today to start your lessons," he mumbled. I blinked.

"Wh-why?"

"It's best you learned it as soon as possible," he explained in that same subdued tone. "You have talent in that area; you'll learn quickly."

Which basically translated to he was worried about me. Funny, I could read him a lot easier now.

A thought occurred to me. "Captain, if Captain Unohana will be teaching me, then will you still be training me as well?"

Captain Hitsugaya immediately stopped pacing, his face frozen with mild surprise.

"Uh, that," he muttered, when he recovered. "Well, to be honest, Miyamoto—"

"You aren't teaching me anymore?"

I stared at him in surprise, and the edges of his mouth turned up minutely. It looked a bit sad to me.

"After our… argument I realized that I'm not the best-suited teacher for you. Unohana seems much more appropriate for someone like you."

"I… What are you saying?"

"Don't get me wrong; I'm not saying that I'm not teaching you because you're an idiot or something like that. I just think that I'm not really cut out for this kind of thing."

I scrutinized him, and he looked disappointed. In himself, I mean.

"Ah… Okay then."

"You'll be fine under Unohana… I already asked her to teach you control, like we'd been working on…" He trailed off, lost in thought. I wanted to cheer him up, even if it was just a little bit.

"Well, uh, I mean… Captain Unohana might be my new teacher but… she'll never replace you as my captain, sir."

He looked at me, and I made a nervous look.

"Yeah, because Captain Hitsugaya is the best, I think! Okay, so you think you're not cut out to be a teacher! That's okay, I mean, there are lots of people who aren't! I don't think I'm a teacher myself, actually… But that doesn't mean you're a bad captain! No, you'll always be my favorite! Yeah, if someone asked me who my favorite captain, I'd pretty much say, 'Captain Hitsugaya! He's the best!' Yeah, uh…"

I really hated how I sometimes tended to babble and act stupid when I was nervous. But Captain Hitsugaya just made me flustered like that.

His face softened just a bit, and he smirked. "Weirdo," he mumbled. "I can't decide if you're foolish, weird, or both…"

"Uh…"

"Never mind. Maybe you should go now."

"Now? Really?"

"You're in for a lot of work to master kendo. Better to get started early."

The thought of doing all that swordplay in the morning after my battle made me want to groan, but I resisted, just in time.

"I guess I'll just go then," I sighed, turning around. "I'll try looking for Rangiku-san too…"

"If you can do that, then I… Yeah, if you can find her, send her over here. And don't tell her I'll kill her the moment she steps into the room."

Sweat beaded down my neck. "Y-yessir… I'll be going, then…"

All of a sudden his hand gripped my shoulder firmly. I could tell he was standing very close to me, and I turned my face to look at him. His expression was… soft.

"Don't be scared," Captain told me. "There's nothing to be afraid of. You won't regret this, I promise."

"I'm not scared."

"Good. Unohana is a good teacher, but if you ever need any help…" He squeezed my shoulder reassuringly before releasing me and going back to the desk.

Staring down at the floor, I smiled, walking towards the door. Right before I went through the door, however, I turned around and gave Captain Hitsugaya the best smile I could muster.

"I wasn't lying, what I said back there," I explained. "Thanks, Captain Hitsugaya… You really are the best."

"Get going, foolish girl," he ordered. "You don't want to be around when Unohana gets annoyed or mad… It's not pretty."

"Aha. Okay. Bye, Captain."

He didn't say anything as I left, but I knew he took what I said to heart.

The nighttime sky was cloudy as I strode outside. Oh, why did it have to be so _cold? _I didn't even have a coat, for crying out loud! I wonder if it was too late to buy one…

I followed familiar paths through the forest, idly marking my trail with a stick I pulled behind me. I was a little sore from my lesson, but it could have been a lot worse since it was only an introduction to kendo today. I knew the hard days would be coming soon though.

Picking my way around brambles and bushes I carefully watched my surroundings. Although an attack here was unlikely, years of survival had been embedded itself deep in my brain, too much for me to give up on the habit now.

I sensed a presence behind me and swung around, brandishing the stick menacingly. But just as I suspected, it was only Ikotsu Hayashi, who stepped out of the shadows with an affable smile.

"Aria. How nice to see you again."

Glad that it wasn't a foe, I dropped the branch. He looked the same as ever; dark eyes that gleamed in the moonlight with dark hair that covered much of his head. Thin lips that were usually curled in a small, wry smile and a long, slender nose that finished it all. He looked perfectly normal, the kind of person I liked best.

"Good evening, Hayashi-san."

"I see your arm has healed?"

I happily waved my slightly crooked left arm. "Yup! No more cast for me."

It was then that I noticed how the very base of his neck was wrapped in bandages, and I pointed that out. That wry smile widened, and a strange twinkle entered his eyes as he reached up and touched it.

"Oh, this is nothing," he said. "I fell onto some sharp rocks and got all cut up. The terrain here can be really annoying sometimes."

I nodded to myself, knowing this feeling. Tripping was really… trippy.

"Enough of that, though. There's a favor I want you to do for me."

"Eh? What's that?"

"Follow me."

He sauntered deeper into the dark forest, and obediently I went after him.

As we walked, I updated him on all the latest happenings, which was mostly the attack in Rukongai. He listened to silently, absorbing my observations.

"I just don't get why they're going after the kids," I ranted. "They're so young; what's the point?"

"Well… I heard the younger they are, the more impressionable they are," Hayashi-san replied quietly.

"Impressionable? For what?"

He shrugged, only to wince slightly.

"They just seem to absorb things more quickly, that's all."

I scratched my head, not understanding this anymore than I already did.

"So what is the Gotei 13 doing about these disappearances?"

"I think they're putting precautions on the students at the school," I sighed, sitting down on a cool rock. "No one, not even the senior students are allowed to go out anymore. If their families want to see them they have to go to the school themselves. Lessons in the world of the living are being more heavily monitored. _Anyone _who wants to go out or go on strict, planned routes that can also be supervised."

"And the children of Rukongai? What are the precautions there?"

Agitated, I looked off to the side. "They can't really do too much about them. After all, Rukongai is too big for the Gotei 13 to cover well enough. The only thing they can do is to send out more patrols around the closer districts."

"You don't seem to like that idea. "

"I just don't think it's fair how they only watch out for the kids closest just because it's easier. I used to think the Seireitei was better than that."

The edge of his lips twitched upwards, and I continued.

"I mean, you know how I was raised in the lower districts of Rukongai… It wasn't the lowest district, but I still had to be careful. And that whole time there I didn't see a single Soul Reaper. Patrolling around the closest sections is no better than what it was before; they'll just target more of the lower district kids."

"You really care about those children that much?"

"Well," I said as I leaned one elbow on my knee, "I just think kids should be kids and live out their childhood while they can, you know? If something like a kidnapping happens, all of that changes. Can't ever go back to that again."

"…Do you remember when we first met, Aria?"

"Yes," I responded, lifting my eyes to look at him.

Hayashi-san's discovery of me had been one of the few lucky strokes in my life. It was still a bitter memory, but it wasn't quite as bad as all the other ones.

_I was walking through the chilly night air. Although I was moving, it did nothing to keep away the cold atmosphere, and my bare, weak arms shivered. _

_I could smell smoke nearby. Faint, yet cloying and pungent. I took extra care to move away from the odor. _

_But for some reason it just kept getting closer, and with the impending smell my speed also quickened. I made a lot of noise, but I couldn't care less. _

_Suddenly, something shot out and grasped the back of my worn shirt gruffly, and with a cry I lurched backwards. Trembling from the cold, my shaky breath came out in thin white mist, as thin and insubstantial as this body of mine. _

_A shadow fell upon me, and I jerked backwards, hands and feet on the ground. A dangerous position, from past experience. _

"_What do we have here?" a soft voice questioned, not necessarily a kind one. "A little girl? Out here?" _

"_Maybe she got lost, eh?" _

_We weren't alone. Soon I could sense other presences around me, and I desperately tried to find a way to escape. _

"_Oh, no, we don't want you getting away now… "_

_Someone grabbed my arm and jerked me upwards. It was then that I could see all of them. There weren't that many, but they were rough and beaten and menacing. Never the crowd I wanted to be around. _

"_Why'd we stop for this one? She's too thin to do anything." It was a female voice, and she shook me violently, as if I was nothing more than some animal or toy for their pleasure. _

"_L-let me go," I stuttered through my fear and chattering teeth. Futilely I tried to wrench my arm from her sharp grasp, but it failed, and she squeezed my wrist painfully. _

"_Oh, feisty, aren't we? Maybe we should keep this one, after all. She'd be entertaining, wouldn't you, you little freak?" She gave a cruel laugh, and shook me again. _

_Cruel words, again. This time, the cold and this situation was getting to be too much for me, and I could feel tears springing from my eyes. _

"_Oh, oh, gonna cry now, you runt? Well, don't think your littleness is going to help you get out of this one. You don't even look like a normal kid; you look like you came out some horror story, right?" There was a faint rumble of laughter from the small crowd. _

"_I-I'm not a freak. Let me go!" I thrashed around seriously this time, and managed to clip the woman's ankle with my foot. She promptly dropped me with a soft grunt and I hurried away. _

"_You little—Oh no, you don't!" _

_I suddenly surged forward, plopping into the ground and getting dirt in my mouth. The woman kicked me several times in the side, and I could do nothing but cry and whimper. This world, it was so cold, so harsh… _

"_You little runt, you're gonna start a fight now? Well, if it's a fight you want, you'll get one!" _

_She began to assault me in earnest, not only beating my sides but my head and legs as well. Some of the others began to join in as well, prodding and pushing me around in the dirt while the rest cat-called and encouraged them. Me, I could only lie in the dirt and cry repeatedly for them to stop._

"_That's right, you little piece of trash. Good for nothing little snot! Gonna cry for Mommy now? Where is she, now? I don't see her!" The same woman gave me a vicious hit in the stomach, and the tears openly spilled now. _

"_Well? Where's your mommy, midget? Oh that's right, you're just a little piece of nothing in a sea of garbage! No mom would ever want you, you freak show!" _

_Words that I hated, words that were said over and over continued to ring, and I could only cry. Why me? Why won't they just stop? Why can't they just leave me to myself, when I already knew that no one wanted me? _

_Rampant emotions coursed through me, and tiny sprouts began to pop from the ground. Amid my sniffling I tried to tell them to stop, but they just wouldn't listen. They never did._

"_Eh? What's that? You want us to stop? Not happening!" She kicked me again, and I no longer had the strength to tell the plants to stop. In the dark they weaved in around the people's legs, but they were too into beating me to notice._

"_Run," I croaked. _

"_What's that? If you've got somethin' to say, speak up!" She hit me again, and it took me a while to get my breath back. But when I did, I gave her a piercing look. _

"…_Die." _

_I felt a sharp pain in the back of my head, and before I lost myself I saw the vines shooting out and heard the bloody cries of the hapless victims who had unwittingly wandered into an unwilling monster's lair. _

_It was very early in the morning when I came to, so early that the morning dew had not yet disappeared from the leaves of the trees. And again, it was unbearably cold. _

_I sat up, feeling raw and exhausted. My body felt wet and sticky, and I thought it was from the dew, so I tried to wipe myself off with my numb hands. But a small splash of color caught my eye, and when I looked, I could only gape in horror. _

_There was blood. So much blood. Bodies littered the ground, and that was how I knew that not a single one of them had escaped. Abdomens cut, heads bashed, twisted limbs. The woman who had been attacking me was wrapped in plants, her neck twisted in an impossible direction, covered in purple. _

_But worst of all was that I was covered in it. _

_My clothes, dirty already, were splattered with the horrible liquid. My hands were dyed in the redness, and I could feel it on my face, my legs, everywhere. I could only shake in horror as I stared at my bloody palms. Caught red-handed, how fitting._

_I didn't realize I was crying until I saw something clear mixing in with the blood. Quickly, I tried to escape, but my legs were just as numb as my hands, and I could barely move an inch. Somewhere off in the distance, I thought I heard voices. _

_Again and again, I tried to rise, but could only fall helpless back onto the blood-soaked ground. I sobbed, like a sniveling child would when he couldn't reach something. Or maybe that was me. Either way, I continued to struggle, and the voices only got closer. _

_Was this the end? I kept asking myself that as I vainly tried to crawl away. Would I finally be caught, and finally pay for what I'd done? I didn't want to die. Survival had taken over. I knew I would fight if need be._

_But a part of me wanted it to happen. Because then, it would all end, this endless loop of pain, and I could finally rest in peace without the tears, the whimpers, the aching heart, the loneliness. So why, why was my body still moving? All I had to do was stop, and it would all be over. _

_Eventually, my body gave in to my subconscious wishes, and I collapsed, facedown. Please, let it me quick now, I prayed internally. I don't need any fanfare, no parting words. Just let this end. _

_I heard footsteps near me, and closed my eyes. _

"Aria?"

I shook myself out of my reverie at the sound of Hayashi-san's voice. He looked at me with a probing stare. I smiled, trying to sound nonchalant, despite the tight knot in my chest.

"Just reminiscing."

We continued to walk, but I didn't have the heart to start another conversation.

The person who I heard walking up to me wasn't a random person that might've killed me; it was Hayashi-san. He had seen me and had amazingly decided to help me. Part of me still wondered why he decided not to kill me, and my guess was that he initially thought I was one of the attacked, and not the person who had killed all those people. And another side of me felt angry at him for not killing me. That side is still here today.

After that, I was sick. I could barely move, couldn't think straight. In retrospect, it felt like I just lost the will to live for several days. Hayashi-san took me in and took care of me, bandaging my wounds and feeding me. There were other people there as well, but I can only remember them fleetingly, since they didn't appear as often as he did.

I didn't linger. After my wounds were healed, I stole away into the night without telling anyone. I felt bad since he had taken care of me so well, but I couldn't stand the thought of losing control while he was around and accidentally killing him. I left some herbs as a thank you gift, which eased a little of the guilt.

Ever since then Ikotsu Hayashi had a strange habit of showing up every now and then. He offered me several times to stay with him, but I refused every single time with the same reason as the first. Every single time he seemed to respect my need to be alone, and for some reason he would disappear before I would. I never really worried too much. After the first few times I knew I would see him again.

At last we stopped in a shaded area of the forest, though not so far from the path that I couldn't get back home.

"We're here," Hayashi-san muttered. He looked at me, and I stared back listlessly. Giving a sympathetic look he continued.

"Aria, I'm aware that you have certain skill with plants, is that right?"

I squinted my eyes. "Uh, sure, depends on how you look at it…"

"What I mean is that you know your way around plants so well that you can identify many just from looking at them, and you know their various functions and uses, correct?"

"S-sure. Not many though…"

"Okay, don't be so modest. I know about that garden you keep outside the barracks. I've heard it's filled with many different kinds of plants and you seem to be taking care of them quite well despite that."

Turning pink, I ducked my head. "If that's what you're getting at, then I guess I can agree with you."

"Well, Aria, there's something I'd like you to do for me."

"Eh? What's that?"

He turned his back to me and gestured to the darkness. From the bushes another person emerged, handing Ikotsu something. Surprised, I watched as they quietly exchanged a few words before the person withdrew and Hayashi-san returned his attention to me. His hand was inside his sleeve.

"A few friends of mine and I were out one day when we discovered something interesting," he explained, walking over and sitting on a rock. He paused there, and I couldn't hear anything besides the faint whistle of the wind and some distant rustles. I couldn't help but feel uneasy in the loneliness of the woods.

"A friend, against our warnings, ate something that didn't look very familiar, and later on became very sick. No matter what we did, he just couldn't get better. When we went back to investigate what he ate, we didn't know what the plant was, as it was something we'd never seen before.

"Unfortunately, that friend didn't get any better. Someone diagnosed him and told us that he had apparently ingested some kind of natural poison, found in that plant that he so stupidly took. That person asked us to gather all of that plant we could find and bring it back so he could make a cure. We did as he requested, but no matter what he did, he couldn't find one. We tried ourselves, but it still didn't work."

"Is that guy still alive…?" I asked, concerned.

"What? Oh yes, he's hanging on, just barely. Though, I'm not sure how long he'll last…" He looked down in what I assumed to be sadness, and I felt sorry for him.

"Is…Is there anything I can do to help?"

At my question, he looked up with a hopeful look in his eyes.

"Well, Aria, as a matter of fact, I think you can. You see, since this poison is a pure substance naturally found in the plant, I thought of you immediately and hoped you could help, since I know of your expertise with plants…"

From the hand that was within his sleeve, he extracted a small glass vial with a cork lodged in it. Inside I could tell there was some kind of liquid, but I couldn't see what it looked like from the dim moonlight.

"Here is some of the poison we managed to siphon from the plant… It's a pure substance, so it should be fairly easy to find a cure for you… Please, if you could find a treatment as soon as possible, I'd be very happy…"

He put his hand out, and I gingerly took the poisonous liquid. It swished around the vial almost like water, strange for something that had the potential to kill. I felt threatened just from holding it, as if its effects would bleed right through the glass. Hayashi-san looked at me with expectant eyes, something that made me uncomfortable.

"I'll… see what I can do…" I muttered. "I've never done this before though, so I'm not sure how fast I can get back to you… What are his symptoms?"

"Well, first he collapsed, then there was the fever and the vomiting… It looked almost like the flu, except when they told us his tissue was beginning to disintegrate. He can barely move anymore. He might pass any day now…"

I looked down at the vial, questioning myself on whether or not I could really procure a cure out of the poison.

It doesn't have to be very quick, but if it was soon then we would greatly appreciate it. My friend…"

"I know. I'll do my best." _I suppose that's all I can do… _

He made a thin smile. "That's all for now. Please come visit more often."

"I will."

He sank back among the trees as I began the trek home.

**

* * *

***This is kind of a bad chapter... Bah. Had to put this in sometime though. **

**Haha, so a new _Bleach _arc has begun! Yay! Everyone has gotten good-looking all of a sudden, ne? Orihime's hair is drool-worthy, Tatsuki looks...interesting with long hair, and Ishida is just...Just so... *goes off into fangirl land* Can't wait for the new character designs, as well as the new movie coming out on December 4th! YOU READY FOR THIS, _BLEACH _FANS? **

**So going back to the Vocaloid thing above, for those of you who have heard of it, then YAY FOR YOU! For those of you who haven't, GO AND LOOK IT UP AND FIND VIDEOS OR SOMETHING. I swear, those things are better singers than a lot of other people... Won't list my favorite songs by them here, because that would take too long, but my favorites are Rin and Len Kagamine. **

**Hopefully the next chapter will be up relatively sooner than the other one... If I can manage to squeeze an idea out of this dry brain of mine. **

**Oh, and another thing, I've been getting some music suggestions lately for this story, so if you have a song that you think would be suitable or you just want to share a favorite with me, go ahead and leave the title and artist in a review or message me! I've been trying to find theme songs for my OCs, but it's not going well because I'm such a music hermit. **

**Leave a review and tell me what you think? Ne?  
**


	32. An Older Sibling's Role

*****I'M BAAACK~ Bet you guys are so _happy _to hear from me again, ne? Yeah, just love seeing this lovely on the screen all the time. No, not really, you don't really see my face. You must be feeling really relieved now, haha. **

**Hey hey hey! You may be wondering, why did I update so fast? Or the better question would be, _how _did I manage to update so fast? Well, since I had no good ideas on how to continue the last chapter and I needed a bit of a time skip I decided to type up this little short thing up. This is a bit of a side story to _The Seed Shrouded by Night; _it was originally going to be inserted into the story much sooner in the story but I never finished it and I had better ideas. I didn't have a good follow-up from last chapter, so I pulled this, lost and forgotten in my harddrive, and finished typing and editing it. **

**This is a short chapter compared to other chapters; like I said, it's only a side story. But I wanted to give more air time to one character so I posted this. **

**One more thing before I let you go: this chapter is dedicated to all those older brothers and sisters out there, or to those who have older siblings or people like them who can relate to this situation. Enjoy.**

* * *

Aria strode through the halls of her barracks, looking about her. She had finished all her work, but her captain, instead of giving her more, had insisted she get some fresh air. He also told her that he needed some space to himself.

"I can't stay in a room with you all the time," he had teased. "I'll go crazy,"

"Gee, thanks," she'd replied dryly. But she knew he meant no harm.

So here she was, wandering around, looking for something to do. Aria listed off possibilities in her head. Perhaps she should go and check up on Rangiku? No, Captain Hitsugaya was pretty thorough with her the last time. She probably wasn't going anywhere soon unless she wanted to get him mad again… And Aria really didn't want to be around for that.

Spar a bit with Kozue, then? No, she was on a mission right now. It would be a few days before she came back. She would go work in her garden, except it was winter and everything was pretty much dead. Maybe she should go shopping for poinsettias and wreaths to decorate the barracks with.

As she continued her musings, the third seat passed by a door that was left just a bit open. She caught a familiar flash of blonde through the crack and stopped, peering through curiously.

It was Takumi Sawahata alright. But what was he doing? She couldn't see much, but it looked like he was reading something? From the looks of it, there weren't many words; every page was splashed with color and some shapes she couldn't quite identify. She heard him make a few sounds but still had no idea what he was reading. And…was he wearing glasses? Aria decided to find out.

Quietly like only she could, she pushed the door open.

"Sawahata-kun?" the girl called out tentatively.

"GAH!"

With a thunderous yelp, Takumi fell off the couch in surprise, landing on the cold, biting wood floor with a dull bonk. Aria winced before rushing over to him.

"I didn't mean to scare you!" she apologized. "Sorry! Are you okay?"

"Y-yeah, I'm fine…" the boy replied shakily. Takumi inhaled sharply as he rubbed his head, his other hand wrapped around the item he had been reading. And Aria was right; he was wearing glasses. They were rectangular with thick, dark frames. Because of the fall, they hung crookedly from his face.

"I didn't know you wore glasses."

"What? Oh, yeah, these are my reading ones… I don't use them all the time, but when I'm reading books and stuff… I can't see things well up close."

"Oh, I see… Hey, speaking of which, what are you reading there?" she inquired. He had looked incredibly engrossed in it; maybe it was a nice book that she'd like to curl up and read.

"Nothing! Just some book!" Takumi quickly dismissed. He held it behind his back, trying to back away from Aria. He couldn't let her see what he'd been reading, no matter what…!

"Really? What kind?" Her smaragdine eyes glinted. Aria was no bookworm, but she did enjoy reading a good story from time to time.

Takumi cursed mentally at having incited her curiosity further.

"Just one I found on the floor of the library once," he hedged. "I was really bored, so I just picked it out. It really isn't something you should read. Really bad book. No plot at all. Trashy. All the characters are bad and unrealistic. Really, Aria, you shouldn't be wasting your time with this."

"But you were so into it when I saw you! May I see it, _please_?"

Her well-known persistence showing through, Aria advanced upon the fourth seat, determined to see what he had been studying. Panicking, he backed away further, his fingers clenching even tighter around it.

"Ho-honestly, Aria, you're bright and smart and all that stuff. You shouldn't be reading garbage like this. There are probably a whole ton of other, much better books for you to read!"

"I'll be the judge of that. Now can I see it?" A whiny, pleading tone entered her voice. She tried to dash behind the boy, but he was too quick, whipping around before she could reach him.

"Really, Aria, I'm asking you to drop it. It's nothing, really!" He briefly considered burning the object with kidō right then and there.

The girl frowned and stopped. She looked convinced.

"Oh, alright…" she acquiesced quietly. His shoulders slumped with relief, only for him to snap up again, careful not to let her see.

Suddenly Aria's face lit up, and she looked around to the door that was behind his back.

"Oh, hi, Kozue!"

Takumi jumped for the second time that day, whipping his body around.

"Kozue? What? Where?"

Suddenly he realized that it was a trick, but before he could react Aria sprang forward, snatching the object from his hands.

_Ah, crap…_

"What is this thing?" Aria asked, her lips pursed. It certainly wasn't a book—more like a magazine she'd seen Rangiku read. The cover was large and full of color—a photograph of a woman in a rather… skimpy outfit.

"H-hey! Give it back!" the fourth seat cried out. He jumped forward, determined to retrieve the magazine. With surprising agility Aria pranced away and strategically placed herself next to the door, in case she had to make a run for it.

"This is… What is this?" She flipped through the magazine. The pages were thick and smooth, and all of them were large pictures of women. She noticed that they were all wearing the same thing, albeit in slight variations. They were all wearing things that resemble undergarments, and Aria wondered what woman in the right mind would let people take pictures of them in their underwear.

The other thing they all had in common—much to Aria's annoyance—was they were all rather _voluptuous _females. All of them had abundant busts (though very few came close to Rangiku's) and had curvaceous figures. They all struck flirtatious poses which she thought only revealed more of their bodies.

Then, out of the blue, it hit her. She looked up at the fourth seat, who was regarding her with mortification.

"Wow, Sawahata-kun, I didn't know you were a pervert," she remarked coolly.

He had broken out in a cold sweat and twitched. "I'm not!" he protested loudly. "It's research!"

"Of course it is… I mean, if you were doing research, it's so much better to look at a magazine of almost naked women instead of an actual _biology textbook_. Right, right, I totally understand where you're coming from." She closed the magazine and fanned herself with it. "No wonder Kozue keeps saying you're a pervert…"

"I'M NOT! NOW GIVE IT BACK! I… I HAVE WORK I HAVE TO DO WITH IT! And please don't tell her I was reading that…"

Aria held up her hand, indicating she wanted silence. "Just one question."

Taken aback, Takumi scrutinized her. "And that would be?"

Much to his surprise, the girl held up the magazine and pointed at the woman on the cover. She wasn't wearing that sly expression anymore.

"Why are these women in their undergarments?" she asked disapprovingly. "I mean, even Rangiku-san wouldn't let someone take pictures of her in _this." _

Takumi almost choked in an attempt to prevent breaking down.

_You've got to be joking… She's so cute!_

He found the innocent girl so amusing that it took him several seconds to compose himself. The white-haired Soul Reaper watched him warily.

"What?"

"Oh, I think Lieutenant Matsumoto would not mind in the least if someone did a photo shoot of her in that…"

_"What?"_

"Uh, nothing…"

She scrutinized the magazine skeptically. "And why are they at the beach?"

"Wait, so you know what a beach is but you don't know what they're wearing?"

"I've read about them, okay?" Aria retorted. "I've just… never been to one, or any kind of water, alright? I don't know what they're like." She seemed uncomfortable for a few moments, as if she was hiding something. Takumi was suddenly seized by the urge to ask a question.

"Say, Aria, do you know how to swim?"

Bull's eye. The girl twitched and flushed, crossing her arms.

"N-no," she stuttered. "What's it to you?"

The fourth seat again had to repress the urge to chortle.

"That's…just…funny…"

"Don't laugh! I've never been near open water in my life, so I never learned, okay?"

"Yeah, I guess you're right, but…" He snorted as his face turned red.

"Uh, so, anyway," Aria cleared her throat, "What are these things, Sawahata-kun?"

Taking deep breaths, he cleared his throat as well. "You ever heard of bikinis, Aria?"

"Um, no."

"Seriously?"

"Yeah…"

He didn't feel very comfortable explaining this. It was like he was an older brother about to explain the birds and the bees to his younger sister. Hopefully she wouldn't ask him about that either… Imagine how awkward that would be.

But then, he had the perfect idea. _He _might not explain this to Aria, but there was definitely _someone else _who could.

He began to laugh as he thought about said person's face, but stopped when he remembered Aria was watching him.

"Well… I mean, I'm no _expert _on them, so it might be hard for me to explain…"

"Um… Then who do I ask?" She sounded suspicious, but had to take his word for it.

Trying hard not to crack up, he replied, "Why don't you ask Captain Hitsugaya? I know for a fact that he's an absolute specialist when it comes to these things." He bit his lip to curb a chuckle that threatened to explode.

Aria thought about this for a few seconds. "Yeah, I guess you're right…" she mused. "He does seem like he'd know a lot. I guess I could go and ask."

It was hard, _so_ hard, for Takumi not to break down right then and there.

"Okay then… I guess I'll just go… See you later, Sawahata-kun." They waved, and Aria exited the room with a contemplative expression.

Once he was sure she was gone, Takumi stepped behind the couch and laughed uncontrollably. Oh, he really wanted to see the look on the captain's face when she asked… That would just be plain amazing.

When he finished, he steadied himself, taking off his glasses and stowing them in his pocket. It was then that something occurred to him.

"Oh _crap._ Aria still has the magazine… Kozue is gonna _skewer_ me!"

* * *

_A bikini? I don't think I've ever heard of that before…_

Aria wondered over and over what a bikini was. She speculated what in the world that had anything to do with the scantily clad women in the magazine. Oh well. She'd know soon enough.

She reached the entrance to the administrative office and knocked.

"Come in," a staid voice permitted. Aria pushed the door open.

Tōshirō Hitsugaya was standing next to a bookshelf, apparently arranging the books. It was almost amusing watching him reach for the high places, but she didn't dare say anything. Upon her entrance he turned towards her in an almost welcoming fashion.

"Miyamoto? I thought I told you we were done for the day." For once, all the reports and paperwork were finished and filed for the day. Tōshirō couldn't help but feel relieved.

"Well, yeah, I know…"

"Then why are you here?"

"I… I just wanted to ask you something…"

His aqua eyes blinked. "Ask me what exactly?" This was rare… Aria hardly ever asked him anything.

"Well, you see… I was walking down the barracks one day and passed a group of people…" She decided to keep Takumi out of this. "And they were talking about some things…"

Tōshirō's eyes narrowed. "What things?" They better not have been saying anything bad about Aria, or else he'd…

Seeing his mistrustful gaze, she shook her hand frantically. "N-n-n-nothing suspicious, really!" she assured. "It was just a bunch of…uh…girls, is all. And I couldn't help but overhear…"

While waiting for his subordinate to finish, Tōshirō was busy clearing his desk of any sorts of trash. Aria paused, pondering on how to phrase her question.

"What did you overhear?" he asked as he glanced at some papers. Tōshirō walked over to the shelf again and fiddled with some files.

"Well… I just wanted to know… Do you know what a bikini is?" Aria blurted out.

Tōshirō froze so fast it took her a moment to notice. His hand twitched as sweat dropped down his head.

"A…what…?"

"A bikini!" she said. Tōshirō winced, wishing she'd speak just a bit quieter. "You see, these girls were talking and I heard them mentioning this and I just wanted to know what they were talking about."

For a moment, the captain was completely speechless. He dreaded the thought of explaining this to her. This was one conversation he really did _not_ want to have.

"Well… Um…" Not knowing what to say, he meandered to his desk and sat on it, trying hard not to make eye contact.

"And also, what do bikinis have to do with girls and beaches? I mean, one time I saw this magazine with these women in these weird outfits. I mean, they looked like they were practically in their… you know, their underwear and stuff. What's _with _that?"

_Damn… Please let me find an excuse out of this!_

"I… can't really say…" he muttered.

"Eh? But you look like you know a lot, Captain!"

That didn't make him feel any better.

"Sorry, Miyamoto," he said huskily. "But you'll just have to… ask Matsumoto about this."

"What? But why?"

"Well… It's just that…"

"Just that what?"

"Just go ask Matsumoto, okay? I… don't really know much about this kind of stuff…"

"But he said—"

_"_Who said what?" He squinted at her. Did someone put her up to this? If that was true, then when he found that person, he would…

"Uh… I meant that _she_ mentioned your name…"

"Who mentioned my name?"

"Oh, just one of the girls…"

_What. The. Hell. If this is one of those crazy fangirls…_

"Matsumoto. Go ask her."

"But—"

"Go. Ask. Matsumoto." Tōshirō's voice lowered itself to a defensive growl.

"O-okay…" Aria backed away towards the door, which she had forgotten to close. She slipped out and peered around the frame.

"I'll just go and find her then… If you need anything, just call."

"Fine. Just go."

She went, the ends of her white hair flying up before she disappeared. Tōshirō sighed in relief.

"Wait, wait, can I ask one more?"

She suddenly appeared behind the door again. The captain jumped and cringed, wary of another question. Then again, she couldn't possibly ask anything worse besides asking him about _that_, and he was pretty sure Aria knew enough about it that she wouldn't have to ask.

"That depends."

"Oh, it's not a bad question or anything! And maybe you can answer this one instead of the other!"

_It probably can't be any worse than what she already wanted me to answer…_

"Fine. Shoot."

"Do you know what tampons do?"

_CRASH._

Tōshirō slipped and collided with the floor. Aria watched in horror as she approached him to help. However, he had grabbed the edge of the desk and was painstakingly rising.

"C-Captain…?"

"Go ask Matsumoto that too," he whispered, refusing to look at her.

"But…"

"Miyamoto. _Ask. Matsumoto. Understood_?"

The third seat wondered fiercely why he was so persistent, but seeing that he didn't feel like talking she decided to leave, slowly closing the door behind her.

Tōshirō sat in his chair with a flushed face. Groaning, he ran a hand through his spiky hair. His sympathies went out to all the parents and older siblings that had been asked questions like this.

"Geez… If this is what happens when you have kids or younger siblings… I feel so sorry for those guys…" he muttered to himself. Rubbing his hand Tōshirō tried to distract himself with something to do.

_I'm so glad no one saw this… I'll never hear the end from the other captains if word got out…_

* * *

In a secluded area, a boy with spiky blond hair had a laptop open. Images moved across the screen, and the mischievous boy grinned and chuckled.

"Ha… I knew this was a good idea!"

Lying next to the computer was a tiny device, an almost undetectable camera that could stick to nearly any surface and contained a feed that transmitted to any location within a five mile radius. He had retrieved it from the wall just outside the office, and it was lucky that Aria didn't close the door the first time she went in.

_"Do you know what tampons do?" _a recorded female voice chimed from within the laptop.

The video showed a boy falling to the floor, and the young man guffawed.

"I hope you weren't hoping anyone wouldn't see this, Captain… Because this is _so_ going on the Seireitei web!"

**

* * *

**

***Oh _yeah, _I went there.

So, what'd you guys think? Have you ever asked someone one of those awkward questions that you didn't really know was awkward but the atmosphere felt awkward? If you have, tell about it in a review, or you can just leave a review, or better yet, you can leave BOTH. I enjoy reading about your guys' lives. Not in a stalkerish way. No, really, I don't. *hides tracking device behind back*

And before any of you ask, _yes, _Aria does know how babies are made.

Aria: Yeah! Of course I do!  
Me: I would tell you to share, but-  
Aria: The magical stork flies overhead and somehow drops them down the chimneys without breaking those precious heads of theirs! Babies are MAGICAL!  
Me: ...

No, she really does know how they're made. I wouldn't make a character _that _innocent. Speaking of innocent, whatcha doin' hiding in the shadows, Takumi?

Takumi: I... I think Kozue's out to get me.  
Me: Ah... She found the magazine?  
Takumi: I think so...  
Me: Good luck with that, dear sir, and I hope you stay alive long enough for the next chapters to come.

Enough of my ridiculously long end note. Leave a review, and if you want, a personal experience of yours about awkward questions. Bye till next chapter, and be safe and don't eat the yellow snow. Because that's where the leprechauns store their gold for the winter and they'll be very cranky if they find it gone when springs comes 'round.


	33. The Bridge Between Hearts

*****Not dead. Just been focused on other things for the past... long... time... Aw man, this is awkward... So, for your sake and mine and to distract us all from my horrible social (internet?) awkwardness, here is the new chapter of that one story about that one thing that you probably all forgot about because I'm just so consistent like that.**

* * *

"Sentaro, you freaking idiot!"

"Shut up, you little bug!"

"Hey, guys, c'mon…"

There they went again. I couldn't remember a time when Kiyone and Sentaro didn't fight. No wonder Captain Ukitake wanted me to take them off his hands. The poor guy, always having to deal with this…

"Buzz off, you maggot-munching degenerate!"

"Oh, oh, gonna use big words now, are ya? How do you remember them all with that tiny brain of yours?"

"Shut up! I'm smarter than you! What do you say, Aria? I'm better than him, right?"

"Um…"

"No way is that batty midget better!"

"Who you callin' batty?"

"Guys…"

"You are, you old _hag_!"

"Hag? Why, I outta—"

"Will you two just SHUT UP ALREADY?"

* * *

"What's up with you, Aria? You seem kind of tense."

After everything had finally settled down, the two other third seats and I sat down and ate some nice snacks together. I had taken up the task of positioning myself between them, which meant I would pound them if they so much as thought about arguing.

"Really? Do I seem that way to you?" I said as I ate.

"I don't know. You just seem off, like you're thinking about something else," Kiyone voiced, sounding concerned.

"Don't listen to her, Aria. It's probably that time of month for her and she's hallucinating," Sentaro grumbled. Kiyone threw him a dirty look and was about to retort something back when my eyebrow twitched. Like magic, they snapped back to their places.

"Maybe… I'm kind of worried, actually…"

"Hm? About what?" This was Sentaro.

"I, well… It's Captain Hitsugaya…"

"Him again! You think too much about him, Aria."

"No, I don't! I have too many things to do to think a lot about him! And besides, I have a good reason…"

"What's that?"

"Well… He hasn't been around much, lately, and when he is he seems kind of moody…" They gave me a funny look, and I elaborated, "Well, I mean, moodier than usual. Rangiku-san seems like she knows why but she's not doing anything. It's as if she thinks it's some kind of phase or something."

The two third seats looked at each other, and I wondered what I was missing.

"Um… Am I missing something here…?"

"Er, not really. We don't know much about it either… We weren't there in person."

"In person for what?"

"We're not really allowed to talk about it… But we do know it has something to do with Lieutenant Hinamori."

"Who's that?"

"She's the lieutenant of Squad 5. She and Captain Hitsugaya have been friends since they were kids."

It was strange, hearing that. If they were so close, why hadn't I ever heard Captain mention her before?

"We don't know much beyond that… You might have to ask your lieutenant for more details."

"Alright then…"

"Beyond that I wouldn't worry too much. Kiyone is just being a drama queen, as usual."

"Who's the drama queen here? You hairy no-good!"

"Hairy no-good? That all you got?"

I sighed.

* * *

"I'm back!" I announced, opening the door.

Much to my surprise, it wasn't Captain Hitsugaya behind the door; it was Rangiku-san. She was crouched down on the floor, reaching for something in one of the lower drawers. She jumped when I came in.

"Aria-chan! It's only you!" Quickly the lieutenant withdrew her hands, wiping them on her uniform, as if clearing up criminating evidence. I made a mental note to check that cupboard later.

"Rangiku-san? What are you doing here?" As if I didn't know already…

"Me? Oh, I'm just finishing up some work like the captain ordered."

"In the cupboard?"

"What? Oh, well, you know, I, um, needed something from there but I couldn't find it so I had to dig around a bit…"

"What did you need? I can find it for you."

"Oh, no, I just realized that I didn't need it at all! Ahahahaha! Funny, huh?"

Of course it was. I tried to hide my suspicion as I went to the captain's desk and organized some papers. Speaking of which, I didn't see him anywhere…

"Rangiku-san?"

"Mmhmm?" By now she was sitting on the couch, not really working at all.

"Where's Captain Hitsugaya?"

"Captain? Oh, he went out for a while."

"Where?"

"Ah, he didn't say."

"Why?"

"I guess… he just needed some space."

Neatly I stacked the papers all in order, keeping my face steadily turned away from her. I was done with games.

"Rangiku-san? Where is he?"

"Huh? I just said—"

"You said he went out and that he didn't say. That doesn't mean you don't know where he went."

"I don't—"

"I can tell when you're lying, so don't even think about it."

She stared, somewhat flabbergasted. "Where'd you learn to do that?"

I shrugged. "Might have just picked it up from Captain."

"Of course," the lieutenant sighed. Pausing, she frowned for a few seconds before speaking again.

"Promise me that if I tell you, you won't tell him it was me, okay?"

"Sure. I promise."

"Captain Hitsugaya goes up to the mountains every winter for a bit. It's not that hard to find; there's a path you can follow at the southern end of the forest. It's in a secluded area, but you might be able to sense his reiatsu if you try hard enough."

"Oh. Why does he go?"

She fell silent, and I wondered if I had moved into a touchy subject.

"Why the sudden interest?" This was Rangiku-san's serious voice, and my suspicion was confirmed.

"I don't know. I just… get worried when he disappears without warning. You seem fine with it, though."

The woman chuckled. "Yeah. I would know…"

Nothing more was said, and I figured that I wouldn't be able to drag anymore out of her. I busied myself with other work when all of a sudden Rangiku-san spoke again.

"We all have our share of regrets in life… There isn't a single person in the world who doesn't have something they wish never happened, or something they could do over," she muttered.

That is definitely something I could relate to.

"Have you ever wondered, Aria, why the captain never talks about other people? People like his friends?"

"I thought that was just the way he was."

"Well… Sort of."

A strange feeling crept into the room, as if the past itself began to fill the room. Past emotions, memories, and desires manifested and for some reason I felt sad…

"It was about three years ago," she began. "I'm guessing you were still in school then, so you wouldn't know anything about it…"

I tried to think back three years, something I normally wouldn't do, since I wasn't too fond of my schooling days. But back then, I remembered that security had tightened significantly, almost as if a hush of fear had settled within the cracks in the walls and simply slipped itself in our daily lives. Back then, I remembered rumors of a war…

"I can't get too in detail, but Captain Hitsugaya had…No, has a good friend named Momo Hinamori."

"She's the… The lieutenant of the fifth division, right?"

"Yes. Captain Hitsugaya and Hinamori both grew up together as children with their grandmother."

I blinked. That meant that the two of them were practically siblings, weren't they?

"The grandmother is still alive, and they visit every now and then… Separately."

"Separately?"

"Yes. You see, something… happened between the two of them. They were in a fight…"

In my imagination, I heard the clash of swords, the cries of the participants, a flash of white hair…

"There was a group effort to defeat a certain enemy, and they had him trapped… Captain Hitsugaya went ahead and pulled the finishing move. Stabbed him right through the chest… Or so he thought."

This hung in the air for several seconds. I felt like a child being told a scary story.

"It was not the man they were originally after. The person he had stabbed instead was… his friend Hinamori."

My heart gave a jolting beat against my ribs, and blood pounded in my ears. Yet, I said nothing.

"It was purely by accident… He had replaced what we thought was his body with her instead… They didn't notice until it was too late."

Blood, ominously trickling to the ground. A moment of deep, shocked silence. My head continued to roar, so much that I felt like I was about to reel.

"He was so angry, he charged without thinking… It was a costly move."

I heard a cry of anguish. I felt blood on my hands.

"All cut down, in a single move. Captain lost an arm and part of a leg."

I didn't notice that all the blood had drained out of my face in these last few minutes until Rangiku-san was looking at me worriedly. At last, I found my voice.

"Sh… She's okay, isn't she…?"

"Oh, yeah. Had to go through organ regeneration for a while, but she was alright in the end."

"What did he do…?"

She looked to the side. "He got over it. Moved on. For a while she was in recovery he went up the mountains to train so he could protect her better. I thought he'd be okay. But…"

"He stopped talking to her even after she recovered, didn't he?"

"Yeah, that's right. How'd you know?"

It was really only a hunch, but I'd seen hints of this earlier. Sometimes the captain would have to come in contact with people from other squads, and every now and then I would go with him. At first I didn't think anything about it, but then I noticed that he always seemed to avoid the quicker path past the Squad 5 barracks.

"Why don't we go this way? It's faster," I had suggested after getting tired of taking the much longer trek around.

"No. This way's faster," he'd say stubbornly. No matter how much I pushed—I even drew a map for him—he would never go near that place. After a while I left it alone, although I stopped going with him because I didn't like going the long way.

"Just a hunch," I whispered to Rangiku-san. She nodded absently.

"He made an effort, I could tell. Went to visit when she was recuperating. Tried to see her when she got out. But for some reason, it just never worked. I think, over time, he couldn't get over his regret, and he felt ashamed about that as well as appearing so weak. So every winter, around the time that battle happened, Captain Hitsugaya goes up to the same place in the mountains on a training frenzy. He goes other times too, but I feel he does this every year as some way to pretend that he can fix what he'd done. I've tried telling to him to go talk to her so many times, but he never seems to have the courage…

"He hides it so well, so well sometimes I think he's completely fine. But just remember, Aria, that he really isn't so different from the rest of us. I put myself in his situation, and it just seems impossible to me that anyone could ever feel nothing after what those two have been through… It's not so hard to understand him once you figure out how to do it.

"It's kind of sad, seeing how lonely he gets sometimes. And yeah, he does get lonely. Everyone does. But you're kind of like a baby duckling to him, always following him around… It's so cute!"

Baby duckling? The way she put it, I felt more like a stalker…

"Anyway, to make a long story short, the hermit is up in the mountains training as if it was a war all over again. You can try to get him to come down before sundown if you'd like, but I'm not sure how kindly he'll take to being interrupted. Ah, what the hell, maybe not. He's been so moody these past few days I swear he's on a period or something."

I cringed and smiled and the same time. Captain would blow an artery if he ever knew she said that.

Still… To be up there all by himself… It seemed a bit too lonely, didn't it? I sort of wondered what it was like to hurt your best friend. That was something not even I had done.

I wondered if his regret was like mine. Deep and haunting, and it never really left you in peace for very long. It was a regret that sent you spiraling in despair whenever you thought about it, but whenever you tried to fix the mistake it would never work out like you'd want it to.

Mistakes we make continue to pile up behind us, and there are some obstacles that force us to look behind at the hideous stack. What did the captain see, upon looking at his own pile of regrets?

He was always the one to take care of others, like me. But who was there to comfort him when he needed it the most?

"Rangiku-san?"

"What's up?"

"Do you know what Captain likes to eat?"

"Why… are these places… so high…?" I gasped.

I knew I was out of shape, but not _this _out of shape. Of course, it _was _quite a ways up… Rangiku-san had said it wasn't a far walk, even quicker if shunpo was used… Lies!

The hike had been a torturous uphill climb for a good 15 minutes before it began evening out. I felt so relieved once I could get a decent amount of oxygen in my lungs, and my stride grew steadier. On the way up, however, I couldn't help but notice the lovely view this height provided. The canopies of barren, deciduous trees stretched beneath the mountain, encompassed by the rocky crags in a small valley. The Seireitei was still visible, a wide expanse of wood and stone, and the Senzaikyū looked like a majestic dollhouse from this distance. Strange, I never noticed the huge crack in the Sōkyoku Hill before. How did that get there?

I had heard that Captain Unohana would regularly hike up these mountains to gather medicinal herbs, and I spotted them everywhere here. I picked them as I walked, hoping I'd be able to plant some herbs of my own once I went home. I placed these inside a picnic basket that hung from my arm. Along with my katana, these were the only things I had brought along with me.

When I had first arrived at the foot of the hill, I was amazed that I could feel Captain Hitsugaya's reiatsu all the way down there. The higher I went, the stronger it became, even though I wasn't even close yet. Every now and then I would feel a stronger burst of reiatsu, and at the sheer weight of it I winced and stopped moving. What was he doing, bulldozing the mountain piece by piece?

But when I saw the mouth of the cavern Rangiku-san told me Captain was in, it was then that I felt a tremendous presence and I nearly collapsed, from both surprise and the weight.

Captain Hitsugaya's reiatsu never felt like this before… What kind of training was he doing?

Nevertheless I continued my trek up the hill, but it took a lot longer than I had thought because of the incredible pressure. The closer I got, the harder it was to breathe and to remain standing. At one point I remember breaking out in a chilly sweat that I had to wipe away.

At last I reached the entrance to the cave, and by now my entire body was shaking. I would have sat down, but I was afraid that if I did I wouldn't be able to get back up. Leaning against the rocky wall, I tried to breathe.

With the overwhelming reiatsu so close, I couldn't quite catch my breath, and decided it was just better to move. Painstakingly I staggered up the short path until I was just outside the mouth of the cave. It was a frigid gush of wind blowing out from the cave that woke me up and cooled me down a bit.

I shivered at the freezing temperatures and in amazement noticed the edges of the cave were coated in ice. Reaching out and touching it, I saw the ice continue its way into the cave and I peered inside. The sight that greeted me was awe-inspiring.

It was a fairly deep cave, yet every inch I could see of it was blanketed with so much ice I couldn't even see through it. Stalactites of frozen water hung precariously from the ceiling, looking both beautiful and menacing. Ice columns reached from the top to bottom, and the whole place looked like a huge castle forged out of ice.

But it was the figure standing in the middle that made my eyes widen the most.

I recognized him from the white _haori. _Two large frozen wings sprouted from his shoulders, and attached to the back was a long, serpentine tail. Claws covered his feet, and talons rested on top of his left hand. His right arm was a dragon's head and neck, and a long, glistening sword protruded from the mouth. Hovering above him were six purple petals formed in the shape of flowers, and as I watched carefully I saw one of the petals slowly disintegrating.

This was _not _the Hyōrinmaru I saw during my fight with Loly. This was something much more powerful and devastating, something meant to genuinely fear. This was the thing that set apart captains from all the other Soul Reapers from the Soul Society. This was Tōshirō Hitsugaya's _bankai. _

I had never seen a bankai before in my life, and being so close to one was earth-shattering. The reiatsu from that thing was incredible, and I now understood how I could sense so far away. The shimmering ice, combined with the amazing appearance of the bankai, put me in a complete state of awe that I couldn't budge out of.

"In…credible…" I whispered. My former plan had been completely forgotten, replaced by my sheer admiration of this powerhouse. I didn't even bother revealing myself to him.

He suddenly swung his sword, and what seemed like a waterfall of ice shattered against the wall of the cave. It sprayed nearly every inch of the area, and I flinched away as a small shard whizzed by me. And yet he came out of it unscathed, master of his own element. I was speechless.

Captain raised his arms again, swinging the sword, and I watched as another river of frozen water blasted from his sword. But suddenly I noticed the direction it was headed.

"AAH!"

Because I was just _so _well-known for my coordination skills, I fell backwards, dodging the killer attack, but ended up bouncing down the slight downward-sloping hill and hitting my head _really hard _against a tree.

I saw stars in my eyes as I sank to the ground, and my head completely blanked out.

* * *

Tōshirō was very much used to being alone in these mountains. In the beginning, he knew his lieutenant was always outside, but did not say anything. After a while she stopped coming up, something he appreciated.

So he nearly jumped out of his skin when he heard a surprised shriek from behind him.

"AAH!"

Then he heard something rolling in the dirt, and finally a crash with what sounded like something had collided with very hard wood. His nerves on edge from this shock, he gripped his sword tightly, ready to kill the trespasser if necessary.

But when he saw the familiar black and white mass lying dazed under the tree, he nearly dropped Hyōrinmaru and his jaw in disbelief.

"What the heck is she doing here…?"

He appeared at her side, staring at the sorry state she was in. Aria had an enormous bump on her head, and her eyes were glazed over from hitting her head so hard against the tree. He felt he could almost make out her spirit floating out her mouth.

Tōshirō waved his hand in front of her eyes, and she gave no sign she knew he was there. Kneeling down, he eyed her.

"What are you doing here, idiot?" he muttered. He reached down and touched her face briefly before shaking her shoulder.

"Hey, are you alright?" he asked sternly.

There was no response besides a blank stare. Tōshirō sighed and shook hard.

"Miyamoto, I know you can take more damage than a hit to the head. Wake up before I _make _you."

He felt some relief as she slowly blinked, the glazed look in her eyes disappearing.

"Get up, you'll get dirty if you stay there," he sighed.

Tōshirō saw the emerald in her eyes, but she had a dull expression.

"Whoa…" she enunciated. "Am I dead? Because I'm seeing angels…"

The captain looked at his subordinate as if she had gone completely insane, and then realized his bankai was still activated. He looked at the large wings at his side.

"Hey, Mr. Angel!" She sounded like she was drunk. "You look _awfully _pretty today~! So sparkly… Eheheh…"

He made a note to drop her off in the infirmary later…

However, as time went on she blinked some more and her vision grew clearer, and before long she saw the real person leaning over her.

"Cap…tain?" she slurred.

"The one and only," he exhaled.

Aria continued to stare up at him. "That's weird… You looked like an angel…"

Tōshirō cleared his throat and stood up. He extended a hand and Aria groggily took it. When he saw how unsteady she was, he held her hand tightly, noting how warm it felt in his.

The third seat slowly began getting her balance and rubbed her head.

"Ow…" She felt tears springing from the corners of her eyes from the large bump on her head.

"That's what you get for not telling me you were right behind me, foolish girl," he growled.

"I'm sorry!" She put her hands in an embarrassed manner. "I was going to tell you I was here, honestly, but then I saw your bankai and I was so impressed I forgot and stuff and just wanted to watch…"

Seeing genuine emotion in her eyes, he dismissed the apology. He was never really angry at her in the first place.

Aria at last noticed the form her captain has taken on, and again her eyes go wide with awe. Tōshirō was somewhat disturbed by this change. It looked a little too much like the looks fangirls gave him when he passed by…

"Wow, so that's a bankai," she breathes, impressed. Tōshirō's tail twitched and he shifted.

"Yeah…"

"Can… Can I touch it?" Aria held her hands together and a longing look appeared in her eyes. The captain had no way of denying this request.

"S-sure…"

Hesitantly, he repositioned one wing so that it was closer to her. Aria slowly reached out and pressed her fingertips to the feathery ice. A shiver ran through her body; this ice was colder than any other she'd felt before. And yet, as she stroked the wing reverently, she still felt in amazement at this incredible sight.

"Whoa… That's so cool…"

"I hope you're not trying to be funny," Tōshirō said dryly.

"No, it's just… _Wow." _

He could see pure admiration behind those emerald orbs and felt unsure of what to do.

"I hope I can get a bankai as amazing as yours, Captain," Aria breathed as she poked the ice dragon that encased his arm. She thought it was incredible how the hard shell of crystal could move flexibly with her captain's body.

Tōshirō felt somewhat uncomfortable and shifted, just enough so that Aria could tell. She backed away, hands up and expression apologetic.

"S-sorry," she apologized. "I didn't mean to be so touchy…"

Even now, she was just so _casual _around him. He couldn't quite understand it. Everyone else, even his lieutenant, spoke to him with the utmost reverence, and while he still heard it in her voice, there was something familiar in her tone as if she thought they had known each other for a long time. It gave him a strange, alien feeling in his chest.

Something hanging from her arm caught his eye, and Tōshirō noticed the picnic basket for the first time. Aria traced his gaze and held up the basket.

"Oh! So I forgot to tell you, I came up here to… Um…" Her fingers fidgeted over the basket, and, embarrassed, she took on a light shade of pink.

"Uh… I thought you might get hungry up here, so I made you some lunch…"

Something occurred to Tōshirō, and he asked, "Miyamoto, how did know I was up here?"

She jumped and grew sheepish, rubbing her head.

"Uh, well, um, you see… I just followed your reiatsu…?"

"…Did Matsumoto tell you?"

"What? No! Of course not, I don't know what made you think that…"

Tōshirō sighed and shook his head. "Neither of you are in trouble, so don't worry about it."

"Oh, well, that's alright then…"

"Why were you up here again?"

"Oh, right!" She leapt into action, digging around in the basket. "I thought you might be hungry, so I made you some lunch and stuff and came up here. It was a bit of a short notice, so I couldn't make anything super special…"

"You can cook?"

"Nothing super yummy. I usually go by the recipe. It sucks because cooking is one of those things you have to do over to get it right, and it's such a waste of food when it doesn't turn out nice…"

Aria found what she was looking for and pulled out an _onigiri _wrapped in plastic. She offered to Tōshirō.

"Here, eat this." She smiled encouragingly, yet he was still unsure. At his reluctance, the girl pouted.

"I didn't poison it or anything! And I'm not that bad at cooking! Geez!"

The captain smirked briefly and took the rice ball, unwrapping and sniffing it briefly before taking a small bite. He didn't think he was that hungry, but the food suddenly made him realize he was ravenous from his training.

"Here, have another one, it's okay. I made lots."

As he shoved another piece of food into his mouth, Aria set down a blanket and plopped down onto the ground.

"I'm glad that climb is over…" She looked up and patted a place next to here. "Why don't you sit down? I have a lot more food for you, don't worry!"

Enticed by a good meal, he sat down and watched as Aria delved back into the basket. She brought out a small box, and Tōshirō recognized it as a _bento_.

"I didn't have a lot of time, since I didn't know how long the hike would be, so it's a bit simple…" She handed him a pair of chopsticks and eagerly he opened the box. But he stopped once he saw the contents. There was a section for rice, some fish and noodles, some fruit to the side… And topping it all off were pieces of sushi with happy faces made out of seaweed. Tōshirō stared at them for a long time.

"Wh-what's wrong?" Aria asked worriedly. Tōshirō gave her a perturbed face.

"What… is this…?"

She peered into the box. "What? You mean the faces?"

"Yeah, the faces! Who puts faces on their food? I can't eat this!"

All of a sudden Aria's green eyes grew large and glistened.

"I… I thought it would make you happy…"

The captain twitched at her puppy-dog face.

"F-Fine… I'll eat it… Just don't look at me like that…"

The puppy-dog face immediately shifted into a grin. Toshiro shook his head. He _really _needed to stop falling for that trick…

The next few moments were spent in silence as Tōshirō indulged himself and Aria greedily chugged some water she had brought along. However, after several minutes, she noticeably winced and looked at her captain with a somewhat pained expression.

"Captain… Can I ask a favor from you?"

"What?" He had crammed his mouth with food so his voice came out a bit muffled.

"Could you stop using your bankai? The reiatsu is a lot to handle up close…"

Tōshirō remembered the large wings perched on his back and sheepishly released his hold on his bankai, noting the strained expression his subordinate was making. The ice disintegrated and showered the both of them with tiny shimmers. Aria was impressed. Tōshirō felt uncomfortable again. He'd never met anyone so fascinated by his bankai. Usually they either remained unfazed or cowered in fear. She was probably the first person in a long time to be impressed by this. Why was she so _different _than everyone else…?

"Miyamoto?"

"Yes?"

"Why are you here?"

"I-I thought I just said—"

"Feeding me doesn't sound like a good enough reason for you to take a huge hike up a mountain, Miyamoto."

"Are you saying I can't climb a mountain?"

"Don't change the subject. I know you have another reason for coming all the way up here."

Knowing she'd been caught, Aria gave a small, sheepish grin.

"To be honest, I just thought you needed some company is all…"

"Somehow, I highly doubt that…"

"No, really, it might sound simple, but…"

They had nothing more to say at that moment. Tōshirō was processing this as Aria was trying to come up with an explanation.

"I thought you might have been lonely up here…Training by yourself and stuff…"

"People train by themselves all the time."

"I-I know, but…" She remembered she had to keep her promise to Rangiku and not tell him about her.

Tōshirō had never thought of his training lonely. He was working for finer control over Hyōrinmaru; the way he was right now, he was cautious of letting anyone near him. Aria was the perfect example of this.

His fist clenched. He should have been able to sense her, before he attacked… If he'd been more careful, she never would have gotten hurt.

"Captain? Are you okay? You have a funny face on…"

"What? Oh, yeah, I'm fine…"

"_He hides it so well, so well sometimes I think he's completely fine. But just remember, Aria, that he really isn't so different from the rest of us. I put myself in his situation, and it just seems impossible to me that anyone could ever feel nothing after what those two have been through… It's not so hard to understand him once you figure out how to do it."_

She extended a hand, hoping to reach him, but for some reason changed her mind.

"Matsumoto told you about Hinamori, didn't she?"

"Eh?"

"You don't have to hide it anymore, Miyamoto… She's not in trouble for telling you."

Aria had nothing to say, so Tōshirō filled the silence.

"I'm guessing she told you about what happened… And why I come up here?"

"Y-yes…"

He couldn't help but smile a tiny bit. "She's a good lieutenant, that Matsumoto…"

"Yeah… She is…"

Silence once more. Yet in that silence Tōshirō could feel a connection between the two of them.

"Captain… Why do you train up here?"

He looked at her, surprised at such an easy question. "So I can get stronger."

"Stronger how? For what?"

"I need to have finer control over Hyōrinmaru… So I can protect."

"Protect who?"

He didn't say anything. There was no need to.

Aria looked at him for a long time, and he again noticed the sharpness of her eyes. She was young, for a soul, yet why did he feel she was so old when looking into those emerald depths? It was like she had experienced several lifetimes in her short life. It felt almost like she could see directly into his heart, as if she already knew what was there.

"It's not good to forget the ones you fight for," she whispered.

He whirled and stared. "What are you talking about?"

"You say you fight to protect, but who do you protect? Whose lives are you willing to fight for?"

Tōshirō continued to look at her as if she was insane. "Hinamori, of course," he replied indignantly.

She expected this, and already had a response ready. "If she's so important to you, why haven't you gone and seen her?"

He flinched, shocked at this inquiry. Growing angry, he looked away and refused to answer.

Aria looked on with a soft expression. She wasn't trying to lecture him. She was trying to get him to see that there were precious things in his life and that he should appreciate them.

"I… I know what it's like to make mistakes," she muttered, wrapping her arms around her knees. "And I know… that it's hard to look back on them and do something about it."

He didn't look back. He simply continued to stare off in the opposite direction. Around them, a quiet breeze blew, and nearby faint chirping of some birds could be heard. Together they sang a quiet melody, one that came from the soul and spoke of the past. Aria stared off, lost in the moment.

"We all have things we want to protect, and to protect them we attain strength," she said quietly, tracing a finger across the surface of the blanket. "But what happens when we forget about the ones we want to protect, but we keep fighting anyway? What do we become then?"

These were questions that he could not—or would not—answer. He was exasperated at his subordinate's questions, disappointed, even, at the lack of empathy. He knew now there was no way she could understand the crushing regret and the overwhelming urge to make things right. He would stop at nothing until everything was fixed. That was what he owed, this was his duty.

Aria was much more sympathetic than he thought.

She continued staring at the ground, lost in the times of the past. Irrevocable mistakes were not something new to her. Ones she had loved, ones she had lost, deeds she had done, whether good or bad, welled up to the surface, and the familiar feeling of her throat swelling shut threatened to suffocate her.

The last thing she wanted was for the person sitting next to her to feel this pain.

"Fighting without something to protect is just brutal violence," she stated. "Without that anchor, that guide almost, the urge to get stronger is nothing more than a greedy play for power. And…Eventually, we lose who we are…

"The ones we protect… Don't you think they're the most important thing? They're the ones who we want to fight for in the first place. To forget them… For them not to be there, it's like losing your purpose in life… Without those precious people around us, we are nothing more than just wandering existences…"

Tōshirō still had nothing to say.

"You regret doing it, right? You wish you had never hurt her in the first place?"

"What do _you _think?" he muttered in a low tone.

"You wish… that you had never done it… Every time you think about it, it just hurts you even more… You wish you could fix it but every time you try it never works out… And the only way to hide the pain is to shut yourself away from everyone…

"You know… deep inside… that you can never fix it. And it hurts…"

This grabbed the boy's attention. What was this melancholy, hollow feeling inside his chest? Aria held her knees up to her face, and loneliness was glazed over her eyes.

"It hurts, being lonely… When you're happy, no one cares, and when you're sad, no one's around to help you…Without friends and family, life is meaningless…"

He heard the pain behind those words, and wondered how she knew all this. What was in her stack of regrets? Tōshirō wondered even more about her unmentioned past, but couldn't bring himself to ask.

It was twice that he had failed to protect Momo. Both times, it was because he was blind, that he couldn't see what was really going on. And it nearly cost him the life of his dearest friend. How do you face a person you've let down twice? The poor, bloody body in his arms felt so fragile and delicate. How could this have happened?

So he vowed to get stronger, so strong that he would never repeat his mistake. He would get so powerful that people not only feared battling with him, but with his friends as well.

But underneath that desire for power, there was fear. Fear that until now, he didn't know existed. He was afraid that he'd never be able to really protect anyone. Before every strike he would hesitate, remembering the image of his sword through his friend's chest. He was afraid to hurt someone again, so much so that he couldn't even face Momo Hinamori.

Tōshirō had been training because he thought it was a way to overcome that fear, but he wondered if really he had only succumbed to it.

"Being alone… It hurts… It hurts a lot… You're lucky to have friends and family who care about what you're feeling. They drive you to excel, and they comfort you when you're sad.

"The ones you love always come first… Right?"

Tōshirō didn't understand her tone or her face. It was an expression of sadness and longing, something he was familiar with even if he didn't understand the cause. But what did perplex him was the sight of confusion, as if she was puzzled over the thought of having others to love.

_As if she doesn't know how to feel love… _The thought disturbed him enough that he grabbed her arm, hoping for the happier Aria to come back. She jumped at his touch, and he felt relieved at the precious life that rushed back into her.

"Ahaha, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to talk so much!" Aria smiled sheepishly and rubbed the back of her head. Tōshirō didn't fall for it, but decided not to say anything. He rubbed her arm reassuringly and she settled down.

"Are you finished eating? I brought dessert too!"

After more hunting through the basket Aria extracted a few slices of ripe watermelon. The captain immediately perked up.

"I heard you liked watermelon so I bought some. Here, you can have as much as you want!"

Tōshirō quietly thanked her and bit into one of his favorite snacks. Out of the corner of his eye, he watched Aria. Instead of eating something herself, she only stared off, and he saw a regular, sorrowful expression in those smaragdine depths. Irritated, he thrust a slice of watermelon into her face.

"Don't just sit there like a dope, eat something already," he grumbled. "You made a huge hike so you'll need the energy."

"What?"

"Just eat the damn fruit!"

"Y-yes sir!"

"Hey, Captain?"

"What?"

"Can I come up here from now on?"

"Why?"

"I-I don't know… I just like spending time with you."

"Well…"

"If you let me I can make you some yummy treats!"

"Um…"

"…Please?"

There was something in her eyes, a longing for company that made him grumble out a yes. He sighed at Aria's immediate excitement, but felt satisfied that he was able to make her happy.

As he was licking the leftover juice from his fingertips, Aria pulled out what looked like some yarn and a small stick with a tiny hook on one end from the endless space within the basket. He watched curiously as her hands twisted so quickly using the stick.

He was about to ask, but Aria beat him to him by asking, "Captain? If you don't mind, can I… Could I stay up here with you for a while today?"

"Wh… Why?"

"Oh, you know… I could use some company, and I don't want to do another hike anytime soon…"

"Won't you get bored?"

"Well, not really. I mean, I have this to do," she held up the items in her hand, "and I don't mind watching you. I was hoping I could learn something new."

Tōshirō remembered his inability to teach and wasn't so sure. Aria fumbled with words to try to persuade him.

"I mean, if it makes you uncomfortable I won't stay… I just thought you'd like someone up here with you… And I don't really mind being up here. I have stuff I can do, and watching you for a bit seems like a really good idea."

The boy could tell she liked this idea very much from the look in her eyes. Before he answered, he thought about himself a little bit. He'd never minded training alone before, yet now that Aria was here, the thought of being alone again didn't appeal to him.

"_Being alone… It hurts… It hurts a lot… You're lucky to have friends and family who care about what you're feeling. They drive you to excel, and they comfort you when you're sad."_

He really hadn't been connecting with his friends lately. Now that there was someone like that with him, he realized what he'd been missing. There had been a hidden void inside him that sometimes he wasn't aware of, formed from secluding himself, and Aria's friendly presence had slowly filled it. He never wanted to go back to that again. She was right—being alone was painful.

"Yeah… You can stay."

She gave him a happy, cheeky grin that made his face warm for some reason. Aria began making some fast motions with the tools in her hand and Tōshirō simply watched, having no incentive to do anything else. Noticing this, she looked up at him.

"Um… Are you going to stand there and watch me for the rest of the time?"

Coming to his senses, the captain jolted and grimaced. He muttered an apology and shuffled back into the cave, feeling somewhat self-conscious.

Tōshirō activated his bankai again, careful not to release too much reiatsu at once for fear of overwhelming his subordinate. But before he did anything, for the first time in a while he pondered over the reasons he was doing this.

"_The ones you love always come first… Right?" _

He trained like this so he could gain better control over his powers. So he could protect the ones he cared about better.

"_But what happens when we forget about the ones we want to protect, but we keep fighting anyway? What do we become then?" _

In time, the latter reason was forgotten as he realized what he _didn't _do overwhelmed what he _wanted _to do. Slowly but surely, his desire to protect in the future turned into a way to run away from what he had done in the past.

"_Fighting without something to protect is just brutal violence. Without that anchor, that guide almost, the urge to get stronger is nothing more than a greedy play for power. And…Eventually, we lose who we are…" _

His target had been lost. Momo Hinamori had been the "guide," the person that had always kept him on track. Now he had become a person who couldn't even come face-to-face with his oldest friend. The urge to safeguard had backfired on him, turning into shame and regret, turning into what he wanted to avoid this whole time: the fear that he _couldn't _protect.

If he hadn't seen it in time, where would that fear have taken him?

All this, grasped in only a few moments. Tōshirō had felt a lost, wandering feeling inside over time whenever he came up here. This made him train harder, more frequently, yet in turn spend less time in the company of others. And this lack of contact eventually made him lose his way.

The captain watched Aria as she continued the swift motions with her hands. Somehow, this girl who was hardly as old as he was had climbed up the mountain and put the secrets of his heart out in the open. It wasn't as though she actually knew what was there; it felt more like she knew the general feeling, and connected them together.

Looking into her eyes, Tōshirō always had the sensation of _age. _As if he was looking into a person who had experienced all of life's trials, as well as all of life's pain. Aria knew what pain was, and that was what allowed her to bond with others, like him, for example.

But he remembered the lost expressions he had seen in the past, and of the uncertainty she spoke with when she talked about protecting the ones you love. Those emerald eyes never looked _fulfilled; _they were empty, always searching, searching for something they clearly didn't have.

"Who do you love, Aria Miyamoto?" Tōshirō whispered.

"Did you say something, Captain?" she called from outside the cave.

"No, nothing."

"Well, alright then…"

Even with all this uncertainty, his being felt fuller than it had been in years, all thanks to that klutzy girl doing who-knew-what outside the cave. He had always trained up here alone, slowly forgetting his purpose, slowly losing his anchor. Well, now he found one, sitting outside. Tōshirō turned to face the cave, fully aware of the kindhearted presence behind him. He trained, and this time alone together, although quiet, brought them closer together, warding away the ghosts of their pasts that used to follow their every step.

* * *

*****Because you haven't heard from me in such a long time, I'm not going to pretend everything's alright and get into a huge speech and stuff. And plus, I'm sure you guys have better things to do than read something some chick in some place wrote on some computer about some excuses. So to cut right to the chase, be sure to leave a review by clicking the green button below and I will see you guys next time, whenever that may be... (5/14/11)  
**


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